This is as good a time as any to mention that Amber and Mike (and Leslie) have met Joyce and Walky and Joe and Danny and the rest. They met them at Joyce and Walky’s wedding, which you can read by purchasing the J&W! members-only pages in the store.
The J&W! wedding happened nearly three years ago, but I’m still trying to finish drawing it, so the last page remains a work in progress. But I’ve drawn… twenty pages in the past few weeks, in a mad scramble? So it’s very close to completion. I’m just wrapping stuff up now.
And, yeah, that means that, coupled with Shortpacked!‘s current storyline, I’ve been drawing two weddings at once, both consisting of the entirety of my living cast of characters. Oof.
Commando is the way to go.
Just ask Joe.
I dont’t need to ask, I just know.
Of course you do, you’re not slow.
So now we’re all talking in rhyme? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
And Bingo was his name-o.
We were rhyming? WHOA!
Better warn Robin Desanto
This back and forth continues to grow!
Where will it all end, I don’t know.
Don’t worry about it, just go with the flow.
Yeah. I’m. . I’m just going to go.
And now the comments are starting to slow.
Anybody want a peanut?
Ah, the age old question–running gag or pop-culture reference.
Ah, the age old answer-yes.
lordphulish: Are there rocks ahead?!
I wonder when Roadblock is going to show?
should I be the breaker of this combo?
Considering how many pairs of Amber’s underpants he made off with it’s only fair.
Why don’t they have Jason tie the bow tie?
That’d take too long to fit in the Wardrobe! sound effect.
True enough, we’d need Montage Man for that!
No super-speed.
Jason’s proven to be pretty super speedy in the past, especially in a certain ‘members only’ strip. He was faster taking down Head Alien II than Joyce was rocketing she and Walky to him.
Yeah, Mike really has no right to be accusatory. Hell, I’m surprised he’s not more impressed than angry.
Maybe he is, seeing how he’s going along with it, no questions asked.
He may not be going along with it for the reasons everyone else assumes/expects/desires, however.
After all, once you’re married, you can then get divorced, and/or commit adultery.
Mike only likes dressing up if it is part of a scheme, not like this.
…But this is part of a scheme, just not his.
Details schmetails…
Mike – “That’s okay. Bow-ties AREN’T cool.”
And then Jason goes off to cry in a corner.
I shall join him there.
Bow-ties are cool on the right people.
Like Barry Allen and Bill Nye?
Blasphemy!
Blas for me! Blas for you! Blas for everybody! Cha! Cha! Cha!
CAKE OR DEATH?
Pope-man, Pope-man and alter-boy!
“Look out, Pope-man, Vampires!”
Wait, Agatha survived?
Huh. I just sort of assumed that if I didn’t know their names pre-Dumbing of Age they died in battle.
She works at McAwesome’s. (Click the tag.)
So she does. Funny how the memories come flooded back once I’m reminded.
So all of Mike’s McAwesome’s co-workers are about to experience the real Mike Warner?
That should be interesting.
Oooh!
That begs the question, do you think they already know? I mean he does liquor up pretty hard for the job, so it must be obvious something is off with him.
At the very least Agatha knew. They were on a squad together.
Hold on a minute, that begs another question: I didn’t think anyone except Amber knew he had a second job?
I mean … that would run the risk of someone from Shortpacked! going into McAwesomes sometime he was on shift, and seeing him… happy. O_O
Oh wait – maybe if they DO know (perhaps from him saying, on purpose), they’ll AVOID it because they don’t want to spend more time with him than absolutely necessary?
I could be getting it all wrong, and misunderstanding things from having missed a storyline or three.
Does that mean FDR/The Penguin is here, or did he disappear when Reagan did?
@Willis. This does bring up one question that’s been gnawing at me something fierce. I know that Mike’s two jobs are probably time consuming, even if the latter (McAwesome) is likely fun, but… What does he do with the extra money from a second job? He doesn’t seem to be living luxuriously, but at the same time I’m pretty sure he isn’t exactly paying off legal fees from boxing babies.
Child Support. There’s a lot of moms out there who had nickles to spare.
They live in San Francisco. You need to work two jobs just to be able to afford Muni fare.
She’s the Robin clone of McAwesome’s
Looks like she’s already planning her wedding reception hookup.
Also, to everyone yesterday wondering why such-and-such didn’t show up–*thtthththtbbbbbptttt*
No Reagan, though.
Reagan showed up… in our hearts.
He’s still waiting for the bus with Aslan.
He wants Robin to continue thinking he’s magic, remember?
The wavering “Wait, what?” cracked me up.
Any guesses who?
Joe
Joyce?
I’d have to say Amber’s mom. She’s in the right position in the first panel for it, and she would probably be thrown by such a revelation.
And…that remark re: Jacob and her Mom reminds me once again why she is so right for Mike and his perpetual faccceeee is why he is so right for her. Happy marrige and a long and interesting life.
So who’s saying “Wait, what?”? I’d guess it’s Stacy, but could also be Jacob. I know that he knows that Amber knows he banged her mom, but I don’t know if he knows about the tape.
Stacy is probably the simpler explanation.
I assumed it was her mom.
Snrk.
You misspelt SNKRS.
You mispelled Snorks.
You misspelled snrk.
Snikt.
SKRONK.
THAT’S RIGHT HOAK HOGAN, THE TUPPERWARES OF VICTORY HAVE BEEN FILLED! AND THE PUMA GOD AND THEIR HOLY SPACESHIP, HAVE SENT THE POWER OF THE WARRIORS TO FOKE AT ARBY’S!!
(It’s comments like these that make me wish there was a Like button for everything on the Internet) XD
WILL YOU NOT MEET THE CHALLENGE OF THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR!? I WILL PARACHUTE IN FROM THE WATERS OF THE SUN TO WRESTLEMANIA HOAKOGAN! AND THERE I WILL UNITE THE POWER OF THE HULKAMANIACS WITH THE POWER OF THE WARRIORS AND TOGETHER THEY WILL BE, DESTRUCILICIOUS!!!
Schenectady.
Schadenfreude.
Samaflange
What the fuck is a samaflange?!
Y’know, I always wondered that too. I’ve only heard it in one skit on MAD on Cartoon Network about ThunderLOLcats.
I was quoting the outtakes audio clip where the line came from.
Look at Malaya, she’s Beaming with joy.
/sarcastic/
which beg the questions…
1. who the hell invited her to the wedding?
2. Why the hell did she even show up?….aren’t weddings and general happiness beneath her?
I’m just hoping all the positive energy makes her burst into flames.
Leslie set the whole thing up. Malaya is vulnerable to Lesbian.
And has a rather long neck, to boot.
Robin, put away the Bible. It’s probably going to start shooting bolts of Indiana Jones lightning at everybody.
Especially Ken.
Wait, are those Joe’s boxers, or did she snag Mike’s by accident during the *WARDROBE*?
The latter, methinks.
She’s simply helping Amber along with part two of ‘destroy Mike’. You see one child will slow him down, but TWO will break him.
Doesn’t Galasso have dibs on the second one?
Only if it’s a male.
Like he can tell! Just tell him the other child is a chick.
I like to imagine that guy behind mike’s parents just came in for some late night shopping and is pleasantly surprised by this gathering.
That’s Gustavo! He runs McAwesome’s!
That’s Gustavo! Is Willis’ next comic based on It’s Walky!
I approve of this idea.
I endorse this message, and moreover, I can totally see it happening in about five years’ time.
And he’ll follow up It’s Walky! and That’s Gustavo! with Who’s Ken?, Where’s Reagan?, I’m Batman, and Is Ethan Gay In This Universe?
And finally Yes, Ethan is Gay in Every Universe, so Stop Asking.
Ethan-Gayness on Infinite Earths?
The plot is Robin traveling from universe to universe, using her super-speed to traverse Hypertime like The Flash. Her goal is to find a universe where Ethan isn’t gay, so they can hook up.
At last she finds a straight Ethan, but in a universe that is gender-swapped, so she still can’t win.
…This had better not become fanfic anywhere, or I will facepalm so hard that my head is smacked right off my neck.
It already did. You see, you just wrote it!
*cue Rod Sterling*
*SMACK*…ow.
I can only imagine what the vows will be like.
“Amber, I vow not to fuck your mom. Probably.”
Cue Stacy: “oh my!”
Mike: Amber, I vow that I will destroy the world, just for you.
Crowd: D’aawww.
Mike: Amber, I vow to not be unfaithful to you for the duratio of this wedding.
*duration. Curse! The joke, it is ruined!
*Curses
*foiled again
More like “I promise not to fuck your mom again.” Once it’s done, that promise is kinda meaningless.
No one’s remarked on how wrong seeing Mike decked out in white is.
I always saw him as kind of a red suit guy…maybe some horns and a pitchfork.
White can be pretty diabolic.
Think stereotypical corrupt Southern small town politician. Or Colonel Sanders.
The former is redundant …. as for the Colonel? He’s hanging out with Ron.
Most non-oldschool depictions has the prince of lies in a white suit, he is an angel after all. The red suit thing is nothing but spin by the competition or just another lie.
Or Sam Winchester when Lucifer was wearing him. He was rocking that spotless white tux.
It could also be dramatic irony. Mike and Amber in white, the colour of purity, while they are pretty dark characters inside.
At least he’s not dressed like Karen Allen again… (shudders)
Sal.
In a strapless dress.
In combat mode.
*seizure*
Man. I gotta buy that J&W box set. Somehow. Unemployment sux.
Not a box set if there’s no boxes! You just get sent a list of links.
amber curves plus strapless wedding dress = very gorgeous!
Waitaminute–whose pants are those anyway?
Robin undressed and dressed somebody in the top row, man, figure it out. /:)
Leslie’s? XD
Ultra Car’s, obviously lol
I always wondered in anime if they always dressed in layers or they can just dress really quickly, then throw the clothes up in the air.
Robin, though, needs to slow down a little. If she took his underwear off, what other parts of his body did she accidentally brush against.
He’s an abductee; he can handle the friction burns.
Remind me, how is Robin legally entitled to perform marriages again?
In the amount of time it would take to answer this, I could become legally entitled to perform a marriage myself.
You have no idea.
http://www.themonastery.org/
But I assume you mean the more traditional way.
I think the better question is “since when has Robin been able to perform a marriage?” We know she can, but just not which church.
Relatively serious question? Are we (the USA) seriously still not at the point where your pet schnauzer can officiate over a wedding yet? Who ‘officiates’ shouldn’t matter; the wedding itself is just a ceremony, for the benefit of the participants’ sensibilities and maybe getting their marriage rubber-stamped by some religion or another; as far as the government should be concerned all that should matter is a piece of paper with about four signatures on it; two participants and two witnesses.
Do we seriously still need some stupid priest? That would suck. If I ever got married I’d expect myself and my wife to co-officiate and marry ourselves to each other, since I don’t consider anyone but ourselves to have the right to declare if we’re married or not.
No you don’t need a priest. The officiate is just a person who signs the marriage license. In fact, in California (I did this not long ago), the marriage license needs to be signed by the officiate, the people getting married, and one witness (though you can have two, I did.)
You don’t need a ceremony. If you just want someone to sign the paperwork, that’s fine.
In addition to priests, people can be married by judges, members of the state legislator, or members of congress. Heck, the judge doesn’t even need to be a judge still. The person can be a retired judge or one who’s resigned.
Oh, or forgot that there’s a position called Commissioner of Civil Marriages. Guess what they can do?
So, was all of this secret wedding stuff just to stop Mike from projecting a video version of his proposal for everyone at their wedding? Amber really IS perfect for him. She knew if they actually planned a wedding there would be dead cats’ heads on the tables as wedding favors. Wrapped in tulle, of course.
I knew Robin would be able to effect a quick wardrobe change! With appropriate sound effects, no less.
OK, seeing as a/ I did it for the previous comic, b/ someone’s likely to ask sooner or later, and c/ some confusion is already floating around, here’s a frame-by-frame cast list for this comic (as far as I can tell):
Frame 1:
George (Mike’s dad). He is awesome. And profane.
(Also, checking him in the archive landed me in late october 2009, which is also awesome)
Harriet (Mike’s mom). She is an unstoppable baking machine.
Gustavo, John Gustavo. Owner/manager of McAwesome’s.
Stacy (Amber’s mom). Ahem.
Mike himself.
Frame 2:
Robin, Mike. You know these people. Or at least, you should if you want to have any hope of understanding what’s going on.
Frame 3:
Ninja Rick, in rear-right 3/4 profile.
Mike again.
Agatha. Blonde McAwesomes Leslie-analogue.
Ultra Car, being stroked by Agatha.
Malaya. Duh.
And behind Agatha I presume we have her co-workers Rose (pink dress, Amber-analogue) and Zaph (orange shirt, Faz-analogue).
Frame 4-6: Amber, Mike, Robin.
Actually tiny nitpick but I’m pretty sure Agatha is their Robin.
Indeed. Former SEMME agent and all that.
Which raises the question of whether McAwesome’s keeps up with the Shortpacked’s staff changes.
Possibly unintentionally.
Looking at the wedding picture and uh … did Jason bring a gun to a wedding?
Given what happened the last time he attended a wedding I don’t blame him.
OH. The Joyce and Walky! page.
Jason’s just genre-savvy like that, I guess. And besides, Walky was abducted before the wedding. (Heh. Funny using that word outside of “taken by the Aliens to get augmented.”) So he had every reason to think further shit might go down.
Ah…
Poor Robin gets ret-coned out of competent, wedding planing credit.
Who but Leslie could keep Robin so focussed and sane enough to pull it off? The evidence was in front of us all along and we missed it!
Bah!
The only thing I want to see Leslie keep Robin focused and sane about is their relationship. I wan’ts my Lesbin (or Rolie?) couple back, yo!
Yeah, I only just saw this and I’m pretty sad. I think I could have gone without knowing that it was Leslie and not Robin. I was pretty excited for her
I wonder if it’s Jacob or Amber’s mom who’s saying “wait, what?” in the 4th panel. Either way, I laughed out loud.
Jacob isn’t tagged. Ergo, Ambermum.
True true
I TOLD YOU! I told you all that Amber was actually planning this, and that explains why she wasn’t at all surprised by the dress or any of the rest of it.
So…
Mike wears boxers, not briefs.
Good to know.
Oh, man. My gravatar makes that comment a hundred times worse.
There’s blonde robin!