Shortpacked! by David Willis
Toys are serious business.
Convention appearances:
Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Multiplex
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Tags
amber
animated
batman
botcon
conquest
conventions
dark of the moon
david willis
dinobot
drew
duncan
ethan
faz
galasso
generations
gijoe
guest strip
hamsters
homosexuality
jacob
jesus
joe
justice league
ken
leslie
malaya
megatron
merch
mike
ninja rick
nipple
optimus prime
politics
religion
robin desanto
ronald reagan
roz
sdcc
sg ravage
shattered glass
star wars
tni strips
transformers
transformers prime
ultra car
©2005-2013 David Willis | Powered by WordPress with ComicPress | Subscribe: RSS | Back to Top ↑
That was quick.
(good job, Lucy!)
She is my ideal human being.
Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn
“Status report on that burn, ensign.”
“Sir, we’re looking at somewhere between ‘No Country for Told Men’ and ‘Knights of the Told Republic’.”
More sicker than cholera and typhoid together.
Owned so hard it violates the Thirteenth Amendment.
this made me choke on my cap’n crunch…
Yeah, I’d forgotten just how much I love Malaya too.
It’s funny because I’d forgotten just how much I don’t.
BUUUUUURN!
A Wild Lucy Appeared!
Malaya used “False Accusation”
Lucy used “Hell no!” It’s Super Effective! Lucy’s speed is increased.
Lucy used “FUCK OFF!” Malaya was BUUUUUUUUUURNED. Wild Lucy ran away out of disgust.
You earn a few points with Lucy, Willis. Good job.
Lucy has been earning points since her conception. She’s already beat out Malaya, Ninja Rick, and is Coming up on Galasso.
Malaya, do you need some lotion to help ease that burn?
Dude, that was a fifth degree burn. ONLY SURGERY CAN HELP HER NOW.
That was a chemical burn, she’s gonna need skin grafts
That was a supernova, there are no visible remains of her existance.
I’m now shipping Lucy x DoA Dina…
Where to?
Abu Dhabi. Like Nermal, they are both too freaking cute!
Also like Nermal, they are big jerkfaces, but are forgiven for aforementioned cuteness.
They are?
Yeah, Nermal’s kind of a little shit.
…How?
Thirding the “how”- I fail to see how Lucy is a jerkface thusfar. She’s been perfectly nice to everyone who’s been nice to her, Malaya was asking for a mean comeback- and Lucy didn’t even stoop low enough to insult her, just to put her in her place. That isn’t jerky behavior.
I misread it as Lucy and Malaya
I prefer to think of us nerds as fallen apples that rotted on the ground and are full of an assortment of bugs.
We’ve fermented into a proteiny cider of sorts.
And yet, for some of us, apple cider and a Wil Wheaton marathon makes for a damn good date.
They’re not bugs; they’re features.
LV: 12 BURRRRRRRN.
I take back what I said: Lucy is best at life.
Lucy is to crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women.
And this is where the ship WTF Lulaya’s hull cracks open and sinks into the Yuri Ocean.
Sounds sticky.
You are naive in the ways of shippers. This is just when the ship changes from the Love Boat to the HMS Hatebang.
WTF XD HMS Hatebang? Oh yeah I got to use that someplace some how.
Kismesistude makes shipping so much easier.
For his information, Lucy and Malaya pound each other every night in the most epic of hatefucks?
Shippers are indeed an odd sort. They’ll even disregard genuine character traits to get two to ,erm, become one
I was gonna come in and say “Burrrrrnnnn”
but I suppose enough people have said that. It HAS gotten a little hotter around there though.
Boy, you got that right. My monitor started to smoke before the page had finished loading.
Yeeeessssssss.
This is going to be a fun arc
That’s what Noah said…The feeling faded fast.
This
You have way with words, and can draw. Please tell me that you have a web comic.
It’s in the works actually.
You don’t just walk away from an argument about nerd stuff! This is Shortpacked!
It’s like if you didn’t respond when someone was WRONG on the INTERNET! It just isn’t done.
I disagree with you. I think you’re wrong, and I’m just going to walk away.
Wait, fuck.
Lucy has broken the comic.
Prepare to be sucked into the event horizon.
Malaya isn’t a nerd, so there can be no argument.
Only anger, and then pity.
This applies to both sides, oddly enough.
Seems to me, you don’t wanna talk about it
Seems to me, you just turn your pretty head and Walk Away!–The James Gang
AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Give it up, Malaya. You’re in a world of nerds and bitching about it’s not doing you any good.
Awesome! Love ya Lucy!
So boys are allowed to be nerdy/geeky even if it makes them pathetic but a girl who show interest in that kind of thing are just fake desperate for attention?
Malaya how did Leslie appeal to you? At all?
Malaya is secretly young David Willis righting Amber’s past-whoops- Did I say that out loud?
I was never clear on whether or not Malaya was aware her sorta-love-interest was a nerd or not. Always thought that would be an interesting reveal when Malaya found out, but she had to go and find out she was straight first.
How often did they hang out though? They seemed to be “dating” for awhile. Did Leslie’s interests/hobbies not come up once?
Well Leslie doesn’t strike me as being particularly interested in anyone’s interests and I always got the feeling it was more pf a physical attraction/rebound thing for Leslie so…maybe not.
I mean to say: Malaya doesn’t strike me as being particularly interested in anyone’s interests.
My theory is that Malaya is one of those girls who thinks that giving her attention to someone is a gift in and of itself, like those popular girls who think they’re being charitable by talking to you. Obviously other pretty girls who work at the store are the same way, because everyone is exactly like her, unless they’re a nerd.
And now for Malaya to realize that the “low hanging fruit” she’s kept around herself to keep her own ego buoyant has moved on to crush on her new rival. And, with luck, has a chance to score an adorable and generally amazing girlfriend.
Hopefully it’ll convince Malaya to stop being so obsessed with maintaining her spot in whatever high social caste she imagines herself in and she can work on developing interests and hobbies of her own. =x
You do realize that you’re basically suggesting that a crazy person can figure out their crazy, right? Malaya is self obsessed and even with all the things going on around her, she may be confused by it, but she’s set herself on a pedestal so she can look down.
Until something happens that makes her loosen her grip on her ‘high and mighty’ throne, no amount of shaking’s going to get her off of it. It’d obviously have to be something that matters to her for it to happen, but the only thing that matters to her is… Well… Her.
This is probably true, but I’d say that Malaya getting called on her bullshit, and being told she’s not even worth ARGUING with, is a step in the right direction.
And I must say, I’ve been waiting for somebody to finally come along who can hold their own against Malaya. Mike could have done it, but it seemed like he never really bothered with her at all, not even on Amber’s behalf.
I kind of liked having Mike never stand up to Malaya on Amber’s behalf. Mike is not a knight in shining armor. Having Amber ticked off that Malaya called her fat, but not really doing anything about it except maybe blow it off, seemed more true to their characters. Mike does nice things for Amber and has beat up people for her, but at the end of the day Amber fights her own battles.
She probably didn’t do anything about that incident because she’s a manager and needs to basically let that sort of shit slide unless it can become an HR incident.
Some day it’ll come out that she likes/believes something truly lame/awful, reveal herself in no uncertain terms as a neckbeard, and all the geeks in the store she so looks down upon will stand around her in a circle, openly mocking and deriding her for it.
The experience of having even Ninja Rick and Faz looking down upon her as contemptible and beneath them will either shock her out of it or make her quit in righteous anger.
Either way we won’t have to listen to her bullshit anymore, but I suppose then Willis will just have to replace her with a new antagonist, who will doubtless be even more annoying.
HA. It’s time for Faz to save the day by finding her contempt for anything she doesn’t get deeply attractive. Malaya won’t change how she feels, but she’ll be forced to not display it openly because every time she does: Faz. XD
Speaking of Faz, she sounds about equally clueless as him.
Malaya was only initially interested in Leslie to spite Robin. After that, Leslie is such a sweetheart that how could she not like her?
This is the first time I’ve truly been disappointed/annoyed with Malaya. Shame on you, girl!
I agree, usually i find her at least interesting, and her cruelty has some basis in a way you can still see a good time. Now it is just plain mean
Why is Malaya being such a bitch?
It’s a day that ends in y?
Because that is all she has ever been and ever will be.
Because noone loves her and she can’t express her hurt in any other way.
Because it’s her primary character trait?
This. Malaya has less redeeming qualities than Mike. MIKE, PEOPLE.
That’s not true. Malaya is honest. Perhaps the most honest and genuine character in the strip, other than Faz.
Generally there’s a reason people aren’t honest all the time – it makes people dislike you. Faz is an equally good example – if he didn’t speak his mind all the time about wanting to fuck people, he’d be a lot more tolerable. So honesty is an extremely virtuous character trait, but also an extremely unlikable one. What’s right and what’s popular rarely overlap, though.
I am Malaya, and I don’t mind that you hate me. I know you need to be told when you’re being a fuckwit, even if you hate me for it.
It isn’t the honesty that’s the unlikable character trait, it’s the lack of tact. Tact does not mean dishonesty, it just means letting acknowledgement of other people’s emotions as human beings filter what and particularly how you say things.
It’s that inability or refusal to empathize with others, and a constant willingness to put their own merest whim above the personal safety and emotional well being of others that makes these characters unlikable, not their honesty in expressing those horrid traits, and their utter lack of redeeming qualities that makes readers and other characters feel justified in hating them.
The honesty then is not the kind of honesty that’s respected as a character trait – after all, they aren’t honest with themselves or others when it gets in the way of their desires. Faz was quite willing to lie to customers in selling them BS toy insurance policies, and Malaya was willing to lie to herself and Leslie about her own sexual preferences in pursuit of a potential relationship there. Ho, their ‘honesty’ is more about wallowing in their other unlikable character traits, like a dog taking a poo on the carpet, then rolling in it.
Of course, these aren’t actual people we’re talking about. These are fictional caricatures created by an author, and while Faz is quite blatantly fictitious, Malaya is less so, and that’s problematic.
There are no ‘real’ Malayas any more then there are ‘real’ Fazs. There are certainly people who display similar narrative traits, but not people for whome those traits are the entirety of their being the way they seem to be for this character.
Genuine in what regards? Says what’s on her mind? Sure.
There are a ton of issues going on in her head that she can’t even recognize when confronted with it. Also, Malaya isn’t just “honest”, she refuses to acknowledge that other viewpoints exist. Yes, people need to be told they’re acting stupid sometimes, but amazingly, these “honest” people need to be told that as well.
Because she was bitten by a werewolf.
There wolf.
There toy store.
“Why are you talking that way?”
“I thought you wanted to!”
“No I don’t want to”
“Suit yourself. I’m easy!”
She is every bitch as she is no bitch, and therefore she is…A GOD!
Malaya, the mistress of bitching, that’s what they should call her. Seriously, five ancient sages of bitchdom all gathered together one day on the peaks of Mount Bitch to proclaim her birth. And a hundred years later, when all the bitch stars had aligned, she was born and made everyone’s life around her a living hell because she is such a bitch!
that’s a quote from something, but I can’t remember where at the moment. That will likely bother me enough to google it shortly
One of Malaya’s defining character traits is that she hates “nerds.”
To her, geeks are inherently awful, and there’s no reason a girl would like geeky things, so she must suspect an ulterior motive, because nothing else makes sense.
I think this is probably the biggest reason Malaya is so hated by the fandom. I mean, the comic is largely about fandom and celebrating it because of the good and despite of the bad.
that and cause shes a woman. just sayin :3
Allow Faz to demonstrate why people on the internet cannot possibly be misogynistic.
What? No. This comic is largely about making fun of fans. Almost every single time a customer comes in the store and says something, it’s retarded.
I suspect that is a case of insider vs outsider humour. When Malaya attacks an aspect of the fandom it is done from outside of the community, while when Ethen attacks it is is from within.
Its the difference between you laughing at your self and other people laughing at you.
“I personally have no interest in it, therefor it’s stupid, and if you like it you’re stupid too.”
I hate people like this. What is she, five? Hell, I think my three-year-old has outgrown that stage.
That’s not what she said, though. What she said was “Oh, I see, you don’t really like it, you’re just trying to get in Jacob’s pants.”
Unless what you meant by “it” was “Jacob’s pants” in which case… you’re wrong. I mean, Malaya’s right about that, it really is the low-hanging fruit and Lucy really should have better standards. That’s not a matter of Malaya’s opinion; on average, nerds really do objectively spend less effort making themselves attractive, and are objectively easier to seduce.
All else aside, you have a logistical problem here. Lucy IS a nerd. This is the entire point of this strip. By your own argument, therefore, non-nerds ought to have to have “better standards” than to date her. So why shouldn’t she seek among the nerd population if she has an interest in romance?
*Insert Krillin’s speech from Dragon Ball Z Abridged where he tells Bulma why she’s a bitch.*
A salute from the Bitch Sages upon the top of Bitch Mountain to you!
OOOOOOOOOOOH SNAP!
YAY FOR WILLIS! SOMEONE STANDS UP TO MALAYA’S HORRIBLE ATTITUDE!
…Not that I dislike Malaya or think she is wrong to have her own perspective, but still, has anyone at the store really talked to Malaya about her attitude? Besides ultracar?
Sorry I mean “YAY FOR LUCY”, I guess. Well Willis writes her so it stills works. Sort of. I’m stupid.
Malaya and Ultra Car are a mutual enabling society. Why ask for better when horrible is adequate?
I know you just mistyped, but seeing “YAY FOR WILLIS!” is just… wrong. It’s like entering a mirror universe.
Goatee’d Mirror-Willis is determined to make everyone sing his praises, and takes no delight in enraging his readers.
Consequently, Mirror-Shortpacked is much less interesting.
I have seen the occasional ‘Bless you Willis!!’, typically follows by confusion on the part of its writer.
Lucy has taken a level in awesome. o.o
Lucy ate 10 Rare Candies made out of Awesome. I just hope she’s EV Training.
Nice Buuuuuuuurn. Point goes to Lucy
I Love Lucy and this is the first time I ever wanted to punch Malaya.
With her attitude, Malaya had it coming.
Lucy – 1000
Malaya – ya suck.
Is it possible for a character to be too likable? I feel like I need to see Lucy do something besides making me like her, or else I’ll overdose on good-feelings-for-Lucy-ahol and probably die to death. And that would be bad.
But Lucyahol gives the best high!
Please only take Lucyahol as your doctor recommends. Too much Lucyahol may result in an overdose of nerdness or awesome, forever changing your outlook on the world and fandoms.
Owned
ooooooh catfight impending
That’s illegal, as is dogfighting.
But pudding fighting has precidence in the Shortpacked!-verse
Obviously I adore Lucy, but is she really taking the job that seriously? Is working at a toy store that much of a statement? Still, good job, Lucy, cutting right to the heart of the matter, sticking up for yourself and living up to your principles. I still adore you.
Statement? I thought she’s working at the toy store because she wanted to, not to prove that she can.
I do not dislike Malaya. That said I’m beginning to wonder what’s keeping her here. Is she still here for Leslie? Because that’s the only reason she decided to stay. You could argue it’s for money, but is she looking for another job? One would expect her too since she openly loathes this one as well as the people she must deal with, let alone her limited understanding about the items and fanbases which she caters to. If finding another job is too impossible for her I can understand, but I’m wondering if the magical magnetism the store seems to posess over it’s employees has gotten to her too. (Sorry…mostly unrelated. Just something that’s been on my mind.)
No, I think it’s a good question to ask, especially since Malaya herself is asking a similar question to another girl in this strip.
If I had to venture a guess, a lot of pretty girls who are insecure tend to seek out those they think would worship them simply because she acknowledged their existence, basically “gifting” them with the attention of a pretty girl. It adds to their vanity but not their self-esteem. This ego-growing (real or imagined) combined with a paycheck might be enough for Malaya. Certainly she’s shallow enough to think that of herself.
I think Malaya secretly IS into toys, but is ashamed to admit it. Kind of like a dudebro who is secretly gay.
She was freeloading before this job. Gotta wonder what skills she has to be working in any other.
Once you’re in, you can never get out.
Like a Giant Chinese Finger trap.
Unless your Sydney Yus, then you get forcibly thrown out.
Probably because she needs a job. And the economy is still kind of sucky.
Also Shortpacked! is probably the only place with low enough hiring standards to accept her. At least in terms of jobs where you have to actually interact with other human beings.
I think she might be angling to get herself fired. Slightly more beneficial then quitting.
I think it’s mainly that she’d despise ANY job, so she keeps working at Shortpacked(!) because she’s A: Too lazy to bother looking for another job and B: They haven’t just fired her yet.
It may be worth noting that we haven’t seen too much of Malaya interacting with customers. I’d imagine she’s here to represent the stereotype of the typical young retail worker: Doesn’t wanna be there, barely does the job, yet somehow remains employed nonetheless.
Well, she did deck that motherfucker who thought she looked like she knew what a Bakugan is.
So… one instance of her working with customers, and she beat them up.
Not as bad as Mike, I guess?
I don’t think they’re gonna fire her. This is a toy store that tried selling “protection plans” along with the toys, after all. A toy store where they locked the owner in the basement for a while. A toy store that has a talking car working the stockroom. If they can put up with all that, they can handle a bitchy twenty-something.
As for why she hasn’t quit yet, it probly is just that she’s too damn lazy to do anything different. She was too lazy to find a job on her own. When Ken got her this job, she was to lazy to walk out. She doesn’t try to change her life, she expects it to change to suit her.
I must point out, the “protection plans” are something Toys R Us actually offers.
Yeah, but usually not while holding a hammer and saying “You wouldn’t want anything to happen to your toy, would you?”
You go Lucy!
Is it me or does Malaya needs some peanutbutter for all of her Jelly(ous) she got for Lucy
I LOVE this girl. BATMAN HUGS!
Batman trained for years to be the best at hugging.
You have to approach the person with your arms down, then quickly jet them up like you were opening your cape to glide. Then you put your arms around them and whisper harshly into their ear, “MYPARENTSAREDEAD!”
Malaya seems to have never grown past high school.
Or elementary school.
Growing up is for nerds and losers.
Well said.
Nerds: the TRUE Peter Pans of the world.
Dammit Lucy, how’d you get so much cooler in just three days?!
Lucy could be pissed because she may feel dissed by our sex fiend since he couldn’t just point out where the ladder was and has to go all manly on her like she couldn’t do it herself.
Well to be fair, it’s not like Lucy knows Jacob and Ken are crushin’ on her. And it’s up for debate if Jacob’s doing it because he’s a nice guy or he’s crushing on her.
Or possibly Jacob is going to save time and just get whatever it is with his at-least-a-foot-taller self. As a five-foot tall person who’s worked retail, sometimes it’s just faster to go that route and find the ladders later.
Reminds me of the place I worked at. One of the managers was about my age and he was gigantic he basically got everything down for us. We’d often joke (he was in on it.) that they made him a manager for this top shelf reaching skills.
BOOM! Fuck you, Malaya!
Lucy, seriously. I love this girl.
Lucy, stop making me like you so much, it’ll just make me all the more sadder when the drama kicks in for you.
I REALLY like Lucy now. She’s the only one I’ve seen so far that actually calls Malaya out on her bullshit.
Gonna be a shame when we find out her flaws…
Why? Discovering a person’s flaws does not negate their positive aspects.
Lucy has no flaws! She is Willis’s only ever perfect character. She has been in shortpacked from the start, as Amazi-Girl
Lucy is my new favorite character.
And here comes the Event Horizon, cause everyone knows us nerds are not that cool. Good shot Lucy.
BUUURN…FOR THE COLONY!
And because inferno was the best ever predacon…you win the internet
And then the Fallen, G2 Forestonite-infused Inferno, G2 Firecracker, and Flamewar show up and everyone dies of heatstroke.
I suspect that part of the reason Malaya is continuing to work there is because Shortpacked! is the one workplace where she can be her misanthropic, bitchy self without repercussions. It took effort on Ken’s part to persuade her to apply for a job instead of just sitting around at home all the time.
That being said, I really like Lucy so far. I hope we’ll get to see some of her flaws soon.
There’s just something odd about Malaya’s hand in panel three. :/
This comic resonates with me, so often we hate enthusiasm for something and try to deride others by saying it’s ‘attention-seeking’ or something like that. I guess this also shows how much Malaya doesn’t really fit in with other SP employee’s general obsessive fandom for some beloved franchise!
FINALLY someone put Malaya in her place
Lucy is amazing. A fitting replacement for Amber. Her eventual assumption of the Amazi-Girl identity will be EPIC.
Yes! Yes! Yes! Thank you for that wonderful rebutal to the people saying a girl who likes nerdy things is just looking for attention!
You know it is ironic how well this matches your recent Tumblr post XD.
There is so many ways Lucy could’ve been done wrong and yet she’s quickly become a favorite. I just hope Jacob wants to be with Lucy for who she is and not as an Amber surrogate.
Trivia: Low-hanging fruit is also slang for testicles.
I was again purport: Sarah’s daughter.
Not unless Sarah had a kid when she was 13.
Or she’s a Time Lord.
Or both!! :O
Oooo! Is her Tardis shaped like the Batmobile?
Well she does look kind of like Sarah’s sister Liz…
Well, it’s not a complete impossibility. She could have had her VERY young and given her up for adoption.
Not saying it’s likely, or even remotely going in my head-canon, but a slim rationalization is there, if anybody wants it.
OH SNAP!!
…Lucy, why are you so awesome?
Ladies! Gentlemen! A CURE has been found!
About Lucy…
Well first thing I need to say I can honestly say I am one of the few people who thinks Malaya is “entertaining”. And by that I mean I love to find her an obnoxious jerk and don‘t think she‘s incapable of any form of human kindness like some. Although she is a a huge jerkass…
That being said – Lucy – thank you. You are friggin’ awesome! I only grow to love you more and more with each passing moment!
I was telling myself you’re almost one of my top favorite Shortpacked! characters, but now I’m saying screw the wait – welcome aboard!
Can I hug you?
I…I don’t understand. Every comic makes me love Lucy even more. It’s like, just when I think I’ve reached Critical Lovin’ Mass, she gets even better.
And I feel so…at peace. I’ve been waiting for someone to tell off Malaya for her douchey ways since she started, and finally, someone has.
Lucy plushies are needed so we can have something to hug.
“Lucy plushies are needed so we can have something to hug.”
My God, that’s brilliant.
And they would be so adorable!
Squeeeeeeee!!!
Can they wear little capes with cowls that can go up? Because I would buy those. I would buy ALL of those.
Let the battle be joined!
Aaaaand it’s official. Lucy is the best character.
Well, she’s a little miss perfect, alright. Hope whatever hidden personality flaw she has is gonna explode in our faces soon.
Her hidden flaw is that she makes faces explode.
The more awesome Lucy gets, the more I worry that something terrible is about to happen to her.
This isn’t Something Positive, you know.
I don’t understand?
There’s a webcomic called Something*Positive that has crossed over with this one (and with a whole bunch of others). In that comic, anyone this perfect is probably going to end up a quadriplegic. Because life is not a happy little fairy tale.
No, it’s worse. After all, something good was about to happen for Robin and then she got Joe’d instead.
Her father was an abusive alcoholic that has driven her mother to suicide and DC cartoons were the only things that kept her same and let her grow up to be a good person we should all sympathize with.
She also turns out to be a lesbian and gets with Leslie, gets Malaya fired, cures Jacob of his erotomania, makes the fat strawman (forgot his name) know better, outlaws cancer and famine and gets Gabe Newell to become slim and fit and release Half Life 3 next week, free to play for everyone.
NOW I finally find out it’s Duncan.
And she gets Robin reelected and legalizes gay marriage for the entire world.
Put my down in the pool for, “Lucy dies suddenly, violently and senselessly. Willis then takes his mask off, Scooby-Doo style, to reveal that he has actually been George R.R. Martin all along.”
No z-snap? I am disappoint.
The Fire department will be needed for that burn.
What is that huge, long, rock hard thing, erecting itself above the mountaintops, towards the outer atmosphere? Why, it’s Lucy’s Like-O-Meter!
Lucy is the opposite of Malaya she is nerdy fun kind and likeable!
I’m starting to believe that Malaya was secretly created in order to make us accept Lucy as Amber’s replacement.
And now the New Awesome Girl has to put the Designated Terrible Character in “her place”.
I’m starting to actually dislike Lucy.
Though that last panel and the previous page make me wonder if this isn’t all just a ploy to develop Malaya.
If so, yay, Willis!
Aye, same here. Glad to see I’m not alone
BOOM!
I jizzed my pants.
My god, get this woman to a burn ward immediate-
Oh wait, never mind, she’s been immolated.
Somehow, the burn is all the better for coming above a toy review entitled “FACE VOLCANO”.
heh well Lucy’s role Model was Cartoon Network’s Teen Tittans Starfire. So I guess shes the Comics (Cartoon) Starfire.
Only Lucy is an awesome character and not annoying at all so she’s nothing like cartoon Starfire.
Agreed Cartoon Starfrire while cute, felt like she was trying tohard to be Bubbles from PowerPuff girls but more innocent with often cringe worthy results. Lucy might have been inspried by cartoon Starfire, but she so far, way out wins her.
Malaya, I didn’t mind when you were a bitch to everyone, when you hurt Leslie, when you whine constantly about everything around you. You were at least entertaining.
Then you brought Fake Geek Girls into it.
Now it’s on.
And not the fun “on” like Marvin Gaye sang about.
The Donkey Kong On.
With A fictional character.
Okay, until this page I actually haven’t liked Lucy at all. She keeps seeming too perfect, it bores me. (but my favourite character is Malaya so there you go). But I’m liking this? I can see her being good for getting Malaya out of her hate zone or whatever you want to call it and their interactions will be more interesting than “oh gosh cute nerd girl who also embodies feminist nerd values OUR MESSIAH HAS ARRIVED” (not that I don’t appreciate that)-
… Okay, quite frankly, I just ship it.
I feel like we’re really being told we should like Lucy, which makes me think there’s some trick to all of this. I’m not falling for it!
To all the people thinking Lucy’s flawless–remember how long it took for Jacob and Ken to reveal themselves as flawed. Hell, for a long time Leslie’s only identifiable flaw was being obsessed with Robin.
Lucy has been in what amounts to a week’s worth of comics. I’m sure her debilitating personality flaw will show up soon.
Shh… just let them believe for now… they’ll learn eventually.
Has anyone said “flawless?” Or were we just banking on “loveable.” Lucy’s probably got some serious character flaws (or she could be like Leslie, with less blatant, but still present, character flaws). But she’s also pretty nifty.
Malaya is the best, and she is absolutely right. Just a cavalcade of sadness.
I was afraid Amber leaving would leave me with ambivalent feelings towards Lucy. Worries averted.
I am calling it.
Lucy will turn out to be Evil!
*Ring* Here that Phone Malaya? It’s Lucy Calling you on your Bullshit.
I am thankful that we have Malaya around; even if she is a total bitch of a scrappy. We all need a vessel with which we can fill our hate and that enables opportunities for awesome-er characters to become even MORE awesome.
Who talks to their supervisor like that?
I don’t think there’s any supervisors in this strip.
Well, it’s been generally agreed that Lucy is God (since being funny and/or insightful for eight consecutive strips is apparently enough to earn that title) and I’m told that makes a person superior. somehow. So maybe that’s it?
Plus it kinda seemed like amber gave her the assistant manager position when she left, along with the corn popper. Guessing that’s not what happened after all?
I think Leslie would be the logical choice to replace Amber as assistant manager.
Yeah, and it’d be kindof a dick move to give the assistant job to a new hire when there’s a current employee there who is your best friend and has been doing the job for you while you were on maternity leave.
Why hasn’t anyone promoted Jesus then?
You know, for someone who claims not to be a geek, Malaya’s got the geek social fallacies down pretty cold. =P
(In this specific case: “I do not like this thing, therefore no one actually likes it, and everyone who claims to like it is lying, deluded, or part of a massive global conspiracy to create the false appearance that this valueless thing is actually popular. This is clearly a more plausible theory than the idea that someone, somewhere might actually like this thing.”)
Geeks don’t have a corner on that market, just look at politics.
Lucy becomes with every new strip even more awesome. That’s incredible.
Oh no. I just realized why Lucy is so awesome…she the good twin. Lucy yus!
There is a family resemblance. And with the elections……
maybe Lucy is a sleeper agnet of Sentetor Yus
She better watch out. If she keeps up burns like that they will nerf her next patch.
I was sad when Amber left, however Lucy is rapidly becoming my favourite character. She is not afraid to display her nerdiness, and she has the (figurative) balls to not only stand up to Malaya, but to slap her down so hard her future children will be feeling it.
Oh, a continuation of this? Okay. If this keeps up, and Mayala actually has character growth, I’ll take back what I’ve said about her. Though she seems like the kind of character where zero growth is the entire point. She’s the designated hater. Problem is haters generally aren’t very entertaining when they are this one-note.
Lucy here seems like a prop to show what an unpleasant person Malaya is, just like Leslie was used during that one storyline.
NEXT WEEK: Robin cleans out the kiddy pool and orders a truckload of pumpkin pudding from Yo To Go.
TONIGHT THEY SHALL POUND EACH OTHER IN THE MOST EPIC OF HATEFUCKS!
T_T I’m so happy. Lucy is the best. TAKE THAT MALAYA! >:D
I’m on to you, Willis. Now that Fans! has ended for the second time you’ve decided to fill the void!
Lucy is the best. THE BEST.
I LOVE LUCY.
Lucy is almost TOO awesome. I’m waiting to see what’s wrong with her. 0_0
Aw, how sweet. It’s Mike and Amber meeting all over again.
I was about to file the low hanging fruit comment from Malaya under “general unpleasantness” and not take further issue with it, but then I remembered her thing with Leslie, who is a nerd by any stretch of the imagination. That is a genuinely awful thing for her to say.
Malaya’s always been rude, ignorant, hypocritical and self-centred, but I didn’t actually hate her because she made a good foil. Now I loathe her. I suppose I catch on late.
Ok, fine. You win. I like Lucy.
*ZING!*
I’ve caught up
I’ve been reading your comics for so many years, Willis, and somehow having avoided the latter half of Shortpacked because I don’t like toys all that much meant that I always had more to read, if I really wanted to. Now what do I do? There’s absolutely nothing like the first read through a Willis archive 
AWESOME!
Not pictured here: the microphone dropped at Malaya’s feet.
Haha yes! Go Lucy!
AW, SNAP!
Pretty sure I’m like the 30th person to make some comment like this, but I literally said it out loud while making the hand gesture after reading her last line.
I LOVE LUCY! heh.
She’s the kinda girl I’d want in MY friendzone.
besides, Who the hell wants someone who thinks that you’ret the lowest kind of guy? Anyway, I’m sure at some point, we’ll find the third dimension to Malaya.
She has guts Malaya, deal with it.
Lucy is totes my new favourite
She gon’ get this work. She gon’ get this work!
That kinda accusation coming from someone who pretended to be gay and actually HURT people by pretending to be something she wasn’t? God, I HATE Malaya. I’m so glad Lucy isn’t afraid to put that b—- in her place like others seem to be.
Right?! And she tries to pull off defending Lesley to her Mom to make HER look like the good girl? Bull shit.
LONG LIVE LUCY!
Catching up on old strips; this made me so happy, I had to comment. A lot of nerdy/geeky girls get this accusation, especially if they’re attractive. Thank you so much for pointing out how incredibly insulting and wrong it is.
May we all aspire to be more like Lucy.