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Hell

by David Willis on May 20, 2011 at 12:01 am
  • 02 - The New Girl

└ Tags: amber, arbys, mike, religion

Discussion (227) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Seerow
    Seerow
    May 20, 2011 at 12:03 am | # | Reply

    There is no arby’s.

    This is meme material I can feel it.

    • wnderjif
      wnderjif
      May 20, 2011 at 12:06 am | # | Reply

      arby’s is a lie ??

      never cared fo rit too much, curly fries was the only real draw for me, and thats only cause i couldnt fidn a suitable local pizza shop to do them well.

      my mother has spoiled me with her awesome pizza shop cooking skills.

      • Heavensrun
        Heavensrun
        May 20, 2011 at 4:35 am | # | Reply

        MOZZARELLA STICKS.

        • William
          William
          May 22, 2011 at 11:55 pm | # | Reply

          Jalapeno poppers.

          • MrUriah
            MrUriah
            June 5, 2011 at 1:15 am | # | Reply

            ONION PETALS!

      • Engelfire
        Engelfire
        May 23, 2011 at 6:57 am | # | Reply

        No, there is an Arby’s. But you can only get in via portal.

        • Kernanator
          Kernanator
          September 17, 2011 at 8:45 pm | # | Reply

          Now you’re thinking with Arby’s!

      • Calvin
        Calvin
        May 7, 2013 at 5:50 pm | # | Reply

        jamocha shakes

    • Michelle Alford
      Michelle Alford
      May 20, 2011 at 12:09 am | # | Reply

      I’m not sure I’ve ever eaten at an Arby’s, so I’d buy it.

      • meanderling
        meanderling
        May 20, 2011 at 12:13 am | # | Reply

        I have, but I’d like to forget about it, so I will convert to the Church of the Arbyless.

      • Seerow
        Seerow
        May 20, 2011 at 12:14 am | # | Reply

        What? Never had arby’s? This is something you really must remedy. Nevermind the naysayers. All you need to get is a regular (#1-#3) with Arby Sauce and curly fries, and you’ll be hooked.

        Then, when you suddenly decide you want arby’s, and for the next 2-3 hours can’t find one… you will know hell.

      • OldsVistaCruiser
        OldsVistaCruiser
        May 20, 2011 at 4:27 am | # | Reply

        Arby’s rocks! Beef & cheddar – make sure the sauce doesn’t drip onto your shirt. Curly fries and a jamocha shake…mmm – and they have PEPSI, not that Coke crap, either!

        • TsunamiJane
          TsunamiJane
          May 22, 2011 at 11:25 am | # | Reply

          THIS. Purely this.

      • Valdrax
        Valdrax
        May 22, 2011 at 3:23 am | # | Reply

        Arby’s was the reason that I thought I HATED roast beef until I got some real, deli roast beef. The only thing I ever liked was their ham & swiss sandwiches, which they don’t sell those any more, and curly fries, which you can get from dozens of other places now.

        You’re not missing anything.

    • QueenThomas
      QueenThomas
      May 20, 2011 at 9:51 am | # | Reply

      Yes. And there’s cake at the Arby’s. You can eat it with the spoon.

    • Lyze
      Lyze
      May 21, 2011 at 7:29 pm | # | Reply

      I think the meme should be ‘There will never be another Arby’s’ instead. Cause really that’s the point right? The thing you want will never come again.

    • SotiCoto
      SotiCoto
      June 20, 2012 at 9:54 am | # | Reply

      Who cares? Nothing at Arby’s qualifies as food.
      I have less than 10 regrets in my life, and trying to eat something from Arby’s when visiting america is one of them. I’ve eaten tastier and more nutritious aluminium foil.

  2. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    May 20, 2011 at 12:03 am | # | Reply

    Actually, the rapture is tomorrow, and the end of time is October 21. Until then, it’s PARTY TIME

    or Hell

  3. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    May 20, 2011 at 12:03 am | # | Reply

    So…does Mike know from experience? ‘Cause I thought that “purgatory or maybe not” thing from It’s Walky was the canon afterlife for everyone.

    • David Willis
      David Willis
      May 20, 2011 at 12:14 am | # | Reply

      He wouldn’t remember it. Walky didn’t. Tony and the Head Alien didn’t either.

      • David
        David
        May 20, 2011 at 11:42 am | # | Reply

        I’m pretty sure he would remember just to be a contrary asshole.

        I’m pretty sure that’s why he came back to life, too.

      • DCHorror
        DCHorror
        May 20, 2011 at 3:21 pm | # | Reply

        But we don’t know if he came back the same way they did either. In fact, it seemed like you specifically pointed out that he couldn’t be brought back the same way.

        • David Willis
          David Willis
          May 20, 2011 at 3:55 pm | # | Reply

          Memory loss isn’t a function of how a dude is resurrected/brought back/whatever. What the resurrection chambers read as “souls” were actually just the echoing of brain patterns bouncing around in the background of the universe. Once the brain stops working, that pattern stops being created. What we saw as “limbo” was just shadows of people who used to exist. We saw Mike in there, but he wasn’t creating any new material that he’d be able to draw upon later.

          • Diego
            Diego
            May 21, 2011 at 12:51 am | # | Reply

            There willis. There is where you killed the dream. The unknown of “Was it Purgatory?”
            Oh well, so be it.

            • Eugene
              Eugene
              May 23, 2011 at 12:32 am | # | Reply

              WHAT’S IN THE BOX?!

  4. deweese07
    deweese07
    May 20, 2011 at 12:04 am | # | Reply

    i wants an arbys now! but there IS NO ARBYS! curses!

    • Justme
      Justme
      May 23, 2011 at 2:13 pm | # | Reply

      There’s an Arby’s just 5 minutes from me! :3 It may not be roast beef, but it tastes great with a slice o cheese and ‘Horsey’ sauce :d

  5. captainswift
    captainswift
    May 20, 2011 at 12:04 am | # | Reply

    Now I want to eat at Arby’s. Damn you, Willis!

  6. Rognik
    Rognik
    May 20, 2011 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

    I don’t think a baptism would be enough to save Mike. I don’t think eyyven a holy ocean could purify Mike’s sins.

  7. TheDoctor
    TheDoctor
    May 20, 2011 at 12:07 am | # | Reply

    FIRST! Ah Well, Mike just described many a trip I’ve taken, and it never fails but then I like stopping at the places “Locals” like to eat.

    • Ragnal
      Ragnal
      May 20, 2011 at 12:27 am | # | Reply

      Honestly if I’m taking a trip, I prefer to eat somewhere, even a fast food place, that’s not recognized in my area.

      It’s why I have little knowledge of Hardee’s and Carl Jr.’s outside of an X-Men toy promotion and Paris Hilton’s ridiculous commercial, respectively.

      • taekwondogirl
        taekwondogirl
        May 20, 2011 at 12:30 am | # | Reply

        You do that at your destination, not during the traveling part. It’s a good way to go through hell in a different form. Also, never eat at road-side diners in Nebraska. Trust me on this.

        • Valdrax
          Valdrax
          May 22, 2011 at 3:25 am | # | Reply

          Just don’t stop in Nebraska is my advice. Keep driving. Fricking black flies.

  8. wnderjif
    wnderjif
    May 20, 2011 at 12:07 am | # | Reply

    why does mike say “your mom”, does he enjoy the long taxi ride to his mom’s house?

    • Chrisby
      Chrisby
      May 20, 2011 at 12:08 am | # | Reply

      Because he banged your mom.

      And everyone’s. For a nickel.

      • DCHorror
        DCHorror
        May 20, 2011 at 3:40 am | # | Reply

        Collectively?

        • wnderjif
          wnderjif
          May 20, 2011 at 2:51 pm | # | Reply

          they call those Mikebangs

        • Chrisby
          Chrisby
          May 20, 2011 at 9:02 pm | # | Reply

          It was a mom buffet.

          All the moms you can eat for a nickel.

        • Sephiroth144
          Sephiroth144
          February 5, 2012 at 2:00 am | # | Reply

          Mike’s Nickelbangs operate simultaneously across the multiversal stream at all space-time points.

    • ryan
      ryan
      May 24, 2011 at 8:01 am | # | Reply

      he isn’t visiting his mom. he’s visiting YOUR MOM. with mike, it’s always your mom.

  9. Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
    Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
    May 20, 2011 at 12:09 am | # | Reply

    Now I’M thinking Arby’s

    • agent_of_the_8
      agent_of_the_8
      May 20, 2011 at 1:00 am | # | Reply

      It’s Good Mood Food. :)

      - a_o_t_8.

  10. Ragnal
    Ragnal
    May 20, 2011 at 12:10 am | # | Reply

    So, does anyone really believe this? That Jesus is really gonna rise from the dead, point at us and go, “You’re good, you’re good, you’re good, you’re boned, you’re good, you’re dead, you’re dead, seeya in hell, you’re good…”?

    • Anon
      Anon
      May 20, 2011 at 12:14 am | # | Reply

      It’s a very small sect of people. Even a lot of the religious right is calling this stupid from what I understand.

      • Ethan Shuster
        Ethan Shuster
        May 20, 2011 at 12:44 am | # | Reply

        Yeah, pretty sure it’s just a small group saying this. It’s not like church doctrine, or anything. Now, I’m just referring to this May 21st end of the world date. Many people do actually believe that there will be some kind of judgment day one day.

      • Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
        Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
        May 20, 2011 at 12:48 am | # | Reply

        Yes, as Bible Believing Christians, we are. Even God didn’t allow Jesus’ human form to know what day or time He was to return, so what makes this guys so special? We believe He will return (Also He has already raised from the dead) but we do not know when so we must live each day like Christ as if it is to be the day of His return. The Bible also says that if a man prophecy the date that Christ will return, it will be made sure He doesn’t return on that day.

        • David Willis
          David Willis
          May 20, 2011 at 1:19 am | # | Reply

          According to the guy’s website, he claims that according to his reading of Scripture, no one can know the time or date of his return.

          Until you figure out all of the other important dates, like the Creation and the Flood. Once these things are revealed to us, we can totally figure it out. And this guy said he figgered out when those dates are, so, woo. He’s specialer than everyone else.

          • Ridureyu
            Ridureyu
            May 20, 2011 at 1:21 am | # | Reply

            He’s done it before, too!

            • Pat
              Pat
              May 20, 2011 at 12:59 pm | # | Reply

              So he enjoys predicting the end of the world. It’s good to have a hobby.

          • FirstReality
            FirstReality
            May 20, 2011 at 1:40 am | # | Reply

            Oh, sure – like I’m going to believe some nerd who says he’s calculated the end of the world on stupid MATH. Next he’ll be telling me there are clues buried in the Holy Trilogy that point to the coming of Jar Jar Binks way back in the 1980s.

            • Rayri
              Rayri
              May 20, 2011 at 11:10 am | # | Reply

              There TOTALLY ARE. :O

              • Pagannerd
                Pagannerd
                May 20, 2011 at 12:57 pm | # | Reply

                They were called Ewoks. They were the “Comedy Relief Character Test Phase”. But they were still awesome on account of their unstoppable tree-trunk technology.

                • ryan
                  ryan
                  May 24, 2011 at 8:06 am | #

                  the only thing that beats wood is fire. i learned this from battle beasts.

            • Thomas
              Thomas
              May 22, 2011 at 12:56 pm | # | Reply

              Personally, I think the world’s going to end because of these reasons:

              The Harry Potter Series end this year.

              There’s a Scooby-Doo Tv show with an actual, over-arching plot.

              Donald Trump becomes President.

          • Roborat
            Roborat
            May 20, 2011 at 2:54 pm | # | Reply

            The funny thing of it all is, even though they are predicting the end of the world, they are still soliciting donations, yet they have about 100 million in the bank already. Why do they need more money???

            • James
              James
              May 20, 2011 at 11:35 pm | # | Reply

              It’s so they’ll have money to trade in for God Bucks after the Rapture. What, you thought stuff in Heaven’s gift shop was FREE?

              • Kaj
                Kaj
                May 21, 2011 at 11:31 pm | # | Reply

                You sir, win.

            • LockeZ
              LockeZ
              May 20, 2011 at 11:36 pm | # | Reply

              Ostensibly, for advertising, so they can draw more people to the Lawd before the fated day.

              Realistically, for a yacht full of crack and hookers.

          • Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
            Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
            May 21, 2011 at 12:57 am | # | Reply

            Which also means that he’s ignoring when Jesus said in the Bible that we can not use numbers to figure out when He’ll be back.

        • me2
          me2
          May 20, 2011 at 11:26 am | # | Reply

          So, does this mean that if I keep predicting it will be tomorrow, then changing my prediction to the next day when it doesn’t happen, then I can postpone Judgment Day forever?

          • Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
            Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
            May 21, 2011 at 1:06 am | # | Reply

            No, Jesus said to expect His return at any day and to live each day serving Him each day to the best of our abilities (now that’s not going to happen to everyone as I’d be ashamed if He came back and I were committing a sin, but we’re not perfect) He will come like a thief in the night to take His children home (Notice I didn’t say followers, because not all who say Lord, Lord, will enter the kingdom of Heaven. Because even the demons and Satan believe and tremble at the mention of His name. People are just, as nicely as I can put this, ignorant, meaning that oh they may believe in God (Yaweh), do all the right things like going to church and giving in the offering, but they aren’t willing to serve Him and His word daily, they’re just in it for the feel good and try to do good works in order to enter into Heaven. And on the other side of the spectrum, some so called Christians are hypocrites calling themselves Christians, putting on a good show at church, but turning around and living like the world, cursing, swearing, and some killing in the name of God (Which He does not condone), and all this is done on purpose! And that is dangerous. That’s why feel good churches that do not preach the WHOLE gospel, taking out certain parts and twisting the rest, are dangerous.

    • RaijinK
      RaijinK
      May 20, 2011 at 12:45 am | # | Reply

      The part of me that’s still a somewhat faithful Christian believes that the second coming and end times will eventually happen…but not this weekend. Simply by virtue of the date being expected, which contradicts Jesus’ own prediction in Matthew 24:36 “No one will know the day or the hour”. It amazes me that some people must think there’s some kind of loophole there. You can’t second-guess an all-knowing guy.

      I believe that the end times will only occur when no one is expecting it. Incidentally, if someone expects it every minute of every day for the remainder of human history, we can guarantee that it will never happen.

      • mickeyten
        mickeyten
        May 20, 2011 at 1:28 am | # | Reply

        That’s brilliant, in a zen kinda way.

      • AgentAdam
        AgentAdam
        May 20, 2011 at 1:40 am | # | Reply

        So I guess as long as someone thinks that the Rapture will be tomorrow, for the rest of their life, it will never happen.

        • AgentAdam
          AgentAdam
          May 20, 2011 at 1:40 am | # | Reply

          ..which you already said. Way to go, reading the entire post you are replying to, me!

        • Aslee
          Aslee
          May 20, 2011 at 7:02 am | # | Reply

          Actually, I have a friend, and almost everytime we see each other, we remember our owm personal meme. “Hello, Sebrina. The world is going to end today.”

          We’ve been doing that for two years now.

          You’re welcome.

      • Carlos Futino
        Carlos Futino
        May 20, 2011 at 6:24 am | # | Reply

        So if it’s gonna happen when nobody is expecting, is monday a possibility? I mean, everybody is expecting it this weekend, come mondya we’ll be all thankfull we’re still alive… Then, surprise, rapture…

        • Random Webcomics Junkie
          Random Webcomics Junkie
          May 20, 2011 at 2:09 pm | # | Reply

          Monday a possibility? Not anymore. Thanks for posting that comment.

      • Bill M.
        Bill M.
        May 24, 2011 at 2:47 pm | # | Reply

        There’s also the scripture from 2 Peter 3:9 that says that God is basically waiting for everyone to hear and have a chance to repent.

        Right there is a key. Sure we’ve got people going all over the world, but until everyone has had a chance to hear the gospel message and repent, Jesus isn’t returning. Basically that means those Christians sitting on their butts in church are delaying the return of Jesus.

        • David Willis
          David Willis
          May 24, 2011 at 5:05 pm | # | Reply

          So what about the people who died without hearing it?

          (The answer being that God’s Scripture is made clear in the world itself, and thus nobody has any excuse for not believing in God and following his will, even if they’ve never been talked to about it. “For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.” Romans 1:20)

          • Bill M.
            Bill M.
            May 24, 2011 at 10:26 pm | # | Reply

            Well, I was told a while back by people more well-versed than me that the people who haven’t had a chance to hear the message of the messiah are the “spirits in chains” that Peter spoke of Jesus preaching to, but I know from my own research that that particular notion is highly contested among scholars.

          • sjosten
            sjosten
            May 25, 2011 at 11:21 am | # | Reply

            Wow. That was really philosophical. Now quit being smart and go back to drawing lesbians and homosexuals. It’s much more entertaining.

    • Kamino Neko
      Kamino Neko
      May 20, 2011 at 5:45 am | # | Reply

      The Rapture is believed by a minority of Christians. It’s not an Orthodox, Catholic, or Anglican belief, though I can’t say much about its prevalence in Protestant denominations that stray further from the older branches.

      Judgement Day will happen. Eventually. According to most denominations. The Rapture, however, is not part of most denominations conception of the end, and the idea that it can be predicted is at best wrong, and at worst actively heretical, in most views.

    • Thenodrin
      Thenodrin
      May 20, 2011 at 8:30 am | # | Reply

      If Jesus does that, he should do it like Madeline Khan in History of the World part One. “Yes, no, no, yes, no, no, yes, no, no, no, no, no, no, yes, no, no, yes, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no … wait a minute … YES!”

      Theno

      • Shade
        Shade
        May 21, 2011 at 6:02 pm | # | Reply

        How about a game of Duck, Duck, Goose instead? We could all sit in a circle and he could go around tapping people on the head going “Damned, Damned, Damned, Saved!” Then the person has to catch him to get into heaven.

    • Jabberwocky
      Jabberwocky
      May 20, 2011 at 11:44 am | # | Reply

      Sometimes, I wonder about my fellow Christians.

    • Laura
      Laura
      May 22, 2011 at 5:48 pm | # | Reply

      Um. Yeah. Most Christians believe that Jesus will return (Christianity also believes he won’t be “returning from the dead” because he already did that, so he’s not dead). In the Scriptures, he talks about the Rapture in terms of “Two women will be grinding at the mill, one will be taken, one will be left” and compares it to a shepherd separating the goats from the sheep, etc.

      He also says you shall not know the day or the hour and says the Son of Man will return “like a thief in the night.” Meaning…yeah, mathing out the exact date of the Rapture is kinda pointless, from either standpoint.

      Unless the point is to get a boatload of money. Sadly, religion is a pretty good way for the unscrupulous to do that.

  11. Inara
    Inara
    May 20, 2011 at 12:12 am | # | Reply

    And suddenly, for no logical reason, Amber and Mike are the most adorable couple ever…

    • meanderling
      meanderling
      May 20, 2011 at 12:15 am | # | Reply

      They are, aren’t they? *clasps hands* Oh, and if your username was a Firefly ref, high five! If that’s your actual name, I may or may not steal your identity.

      • Kaylee
        Kaylee
        May 20, 2011 at 6:11 pm | # | Reply

        It’s probably just a coincidence.

    • Lesharo
      Lesharo
      May 20, 2011 at 11:02 am | # | Reply

      I know I thoroughly enjoyed the fact that Amber didn’t even try to correct Mike’s idea that he’s going to hell. She knows him

  12. Bekah
    Bekah
    May 20, 2011 at 12:14 am | # | Reply

    Every time I eat at Arby’s I poop liquid for 3 days.

    I feel you Mike. I feel your pain.

  13. Cholma
    Cholma
    May 20, 2011 at 12:18 am | # | Reply

    Arby’s is love.

  14. Sephiroth144
    Sephiroth144
    May 20, 2011 at 12:24 am | # | Reply

    Wow, so Amber’s that delusional… Although, Mike’s finale made me laugh for two solid minutes, so bravo Mnsr Willis.

    • Heavensrun
      Heavensrun
      May 20, 2011 at 4:41 am | # | Reply

      I rather doubt Amber actually -believes- the RV.

  15. Dierna
    Dierna
    May 20, 2011 at 12:36 am | # | Reply

    It’s not the end of the world. It’s just the rapture where some 200+ million folks will be taken to heaven or whatever. And the time of the rapture is apperantly at 6pm LOCAL TIME. Which means each time zone gets raptured one at a time. Which means if this is all true we should be seeing something effect Australia/New Zealand first. *lol*

    Meanwhile everyone left behind. The world apperantly ends Oct 21st.

    • David Willis
      David Willis
      May 20, 2011 at 12:41 am | # | Reply

      Yes, I am aware. But Amber is responding appropriately to what she’s reading on the RV, which says on it exactly what FamilyRadio’s real RVs say.

    • Rick Sivart
      Rick Sivart
      May 20, 2011 at 9:40 am | # | Reply

      This could be complicated. What if you are one of the chosen ones and you are traveling East at 5:45 and you cross into the next time zone making it 6:45? Did you miss your chance?

      • Pagannerd
        Pagannerd
        May 20, 2011 at 1:00 pm | # | Reply

        If thou art amongst The Chosen, The Rapture shall wait unto thine earliest convenience.

    • gwalla
      gwalla
      May 20, 2011 at 2:34 pm | # | Reply

      Camping actually has said that it will sweep across the world like that. He’s a crackpot, but at least he’s somewhat consistent.

  16. Ridureyu
    Ridureyu
    May 20, 2011 at 12:39 am | # | Reply

    Stupid Harold Camping. Stupid cults.

    But anyway, I checked the World Wide Church of God’s radio site – they have schedules set up for Saturday and Sunday.

    …Oops?

    • BlueNight
      BlueNight
      May 20, 2011 at 2:46 am | # | Reply

      Taped repeats?

      Anyway, this guy is easy to refute:
      1. He claims only his church is going to be raptured. That’s a sure sign of a cult.
      2. He says he knows the date and time. Bible says only God the Father does, and Harold Camping is not God the Father.
      3. The world ends on Oct. 21? That’s not seven years after the Rapture, or a thousand years of Jesus reigning on Earth later.

      Also, there are multiple interpretations of the verses of scripture that have been interpreted as being the Rapture. Another is Post-tribulation Rapture, where after seven years of the worst times the world has ever seen (plus the Anti-Christ being declared Messiah by Israel and a meteor or comet that kills a third of the world’s population), the Rapture is Christians meeting Jesus in the air.

      Also (totally serious here) nobody deserves to be saved, because everyone has hurt someone else. But God will save anyone who asks Him to save them. Not necessarily save them from pain, suffering, death, anguish, evils, or murder in this world, but upload them to Heaven instead of Hell upon death, to spend forever exploring a world created by someone with infinite imagination and who wants to see everyone have infinite personal growth over eternity. (Other phrasing is equivalent, but not poetic.)

      TL;dr. Harold Camping is a troll, and if he and his flock disappear on Saturday, it’s a CIA black ops job.

      • Cybersnark
        Cybersnark
        May 20, 2011 at 8:22 am | # | Reply

        to spend forever exploring a world created by someone with infinite imagination and who wants to see everyone have infinite personal growth over eternity.
        God is Jim Henson!

      • Abjuron
        Abjuron
        May 20, 2011 at 12:39 pm | # | Reply

        Hah! Oh wow, I hadn’t heard yet that he said it was ONLY his church that would be worthy of Rapture…

        I do hope that the FBI is keeping an eye on these guys to ensure we don’t have another Branch Davidians/Heaven’s Gate kerfuffle.

  17. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    May 20, 2011 at 12:44 am | # | Reply

    I can honestly say that I have never heard of this Arby’s before. Is it a burger shop or something else?

    • David Willis
      David Willis
      May 20, 2011 at 12:45 am | # | Reply

      Arby’s is a fast food chain that specializes in sliced roast beef sandwiches served on hamburger buns. They have a sauce. It is delicious.

      • agent_of_the_8
        agent_of_the_8
        May 20, 2011 at 1:06 am | # | Reply

        They also have a turkey, bacon and ranch sam’mich that is AWESOME! And their Reuben is tasty, too.=)

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        May 20, 2011 at 1:16 am | # | Reply

        So Arbys is a type of carvery with secret recipe thing going for it? Sounds nice enough.

        • Bekah
          Bekah
          May 20, 2011 at 1:42 am | # | Reply

          If by carvery you mean “fancy” fast food, then yes. That is precisely what it is.

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            May 20, 2011 at 1:47 am | # | Reply

            Carvery: A restaurant featuring cooked meat is freshly sliced to order for customers ranging from sandwish, rolls to roast dinners.

            • Bekah
              Bekah
              May 20, 2011 at 2:13 am | # | Reply

              Then no, that’s not what it is.

              Arby’s roast beef comes to Arby’s pre-sliced in bags.

              Or at least it did when I worked there 8 years ago.

              • David Willis
                David Willis
                May 20, 2011 at 2:42 am | # | Reply

                As long as I’ve been alive, Arby’s had had meat slicing machines behind the counter, and I’ve seen them use them. Maybe you worked at the ghetto-est of Arby’s?

                • DCHorror
                  DCHorror
                  May 20, 2011 at 3:45 am | #

                  It depends on the Arby’s you go to. Some Arby’s are nice, and then some aren’t. It’s generally a good idea to hunt down the nice ones.

                • Bekah
                  Bekah
                  May 20, 2011 at 7:53 am | #

                  I’m Canadian?

                • Thenodrin
                  Thenodrin
                  May 20, 2011 at 8:35 am | #

                  I’ve never been, but I’ve been told that Canada is a nice place.

                  However, Bekah claims otherwise. As, how can a place who harms Arby’s continue to be considered “nice?”

                  Theno

                • Kaj
                  Kaj
                  May 21, 2011 at 11:39 pm | #

                  Yeah, it’s pretty nice up here… except that time my entire school was frozen in time for a while…

              • Roborat
                Roborat
                May 20, 2011 at 2:58 pm | # | Reply

                I generally like Arby’s. the problem is that they are inconsistant, some locations are good, some the food is terrible.

                • Kitsuki Noriyuki
                  Kitsuki Noriyuki
                  May 20, 2011 at 4:54 pm | #

                  You know you just described every chain restaurant in existence right?

              • Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
                Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
                May 21, 2011 at 12:52 am | # | Reply

                I know that all the Arby’s I’ve ever gone to, all have the meat slicers. I guess the ones in Ohio, below the Columbus line at least, are different from the rest in America. I haven’t been to Arby’s in so long, I think I’m going to get some tomorrow.

              • Valdrax
                Valdrax
                May 22, 2011 at 1:43 pm | # | Reply

                Your avatar is the best ever for the topic at hand.

      • Linkara
        Linkara
        May 20, 2011 at 2:31 am | # | Reply

        Dude, don’t forget the potato cakes!

      • OldsVistaCruiser
        OldsVistaCruiser
        May 20, 2011 at 4:38 am | # | Reply

        MMMM!!! Roast beast!

    • Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
      Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
      May 20, 2011 at 12:52 am | # | Reply

      You have never HEARD OF ARBY’S?!?! AAAACK!

      • Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
        Digidestined of Trust/Megaligo Ranger-Silver Dragon Knight (Tim)
        May 20, 2011 at 12:53 am | # | Reply

        I suddenly have the urge to yell, WITCH! For not knowing what Arby’s is.
        Okay, I’m done.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        May 20, 2011 at 1:18 am | # | Reply

        I am an Australian and as far as I know, this particular American chain restaurant doesn’t exist here.

        • Dierna
          Dierna
          May 20, 2011 at 6:18 pm | # | Reply

          Arby’s is definatly not in Australia. There’s Arby’s in 48 states (Vermont and Rhode Island don’t have any for some reason), Canada, Russia, Qatar, Turkey, United Arab Emerites and the UK.

          Wendy’s and Arby’s are basically sister restauraunts. Unfortunatly tho Wendy’s is no longer in Australia. *L*
          http://www.wendysarbys.com/

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            May 21, 2011 at 6:40 pm | # | Reply

            We do have Wendys thou.

    • Ridureyu
      Ridureyu
      May 20, 2011 at 1:39 am | # | Reply

      You know, guys, Harold Camping already tried this in 1994. He’s just recycling his old material!

      • David Willis
        David Willis
        May 20, 2011 at 1:41 am | # | Reply

        But back then he had a QUESTION MARK! He wasn’t sure yet!

        • Ridureyu
          Ridureyu
          May 20, 2011 at 1:49 am | # | Reply

          He’ll find a way to sneak a question mark in, just wait!

          If only I could find where I wrote that article on his group for one of my old jobs. Dangit.

  18. Aleekatt
    Aleekatt
    May 20, 2011 at 12:48 am | # | Reply

    This is the BEST EVER Explaination for hell I’ve ever heard. I’ve been in this situation too many times to count. Substitute Arby’s for whatever travel food place you like. McDonalds, Burger King, Roy Rogers, Sbarros, etc. It all works out. Best Ever.

    • David Willis
      David Willis
      May 20, 2011 at 1:07 am | # | Reply

      In my personal experience, it’s Taco Bell, but for the sake of not overmentioning Taco Bell in my own work, I substituted Arby’s.

      • Shecky
        Shecky
        May 20, 2011 at 8:25 am | # | Reply

        There is a reason is gets nicknamed Taco Hell, but to each their own of course.

        • Wackd
          Wackd
          May 20, 2011 at 9:05 am | # | Reply

          Taco Hell? Didn’t some wacky guy massacre a bunch of people with a spork there back in the late 90s?

          • Patrick McGraw
            Patrick McGraw
            May 20, 2011 at 9:20 am | # | Reply

            Hell is discovering that every Quiznos in your city has closed down. And then you discover that no, there is still one left, but they no longer offer their Black Angus with onion and mushrooms.

            • Kit
              Kit
              May 20, 2011 at 7:23 pm | # | Reply

              THIS.
              Except they don’t have carbonera sauce where I live now. D:

          • CZ
            CZ
            May 20, 2011 at 10:36 am | # | Reply

            Wow, a JtHM reference. Now I’ve got the urge to dig them out of my comics box and read them again. Damn you.

          • agent_of_the_8
            agent_of_the_8
            May 20, 2011 at 12:27 pm | # | Reply

            Including all the cockroaches in the kitchen. ;)

      • MarkReed
        MarkReed
        January 5, 2013 at 10:56 pm | # | Reply

        Yeah, this comic sounded like Mike was being your author avatar. You certainly take enough road trips for this to get pretty annoying.

  19. Chrisby
    Chrisby
    May 20, 2011 at 12:50 am | # | Reply

    Hey David (or anyone else who knows)….what kind of shirts are those that Mike’s been wearing recently, with the differently colored sleeves/neck? Like are they called something specific or are they just a particular style of t-shirt?

    • Lane
      Lane
      May 20, 2011 at 1:09 am | # | Reply

      They’re called baseball tees, I believe.

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      May 20, 2011 at 3:01 pm | # | Reply

      I have always called them baseball shirts. I went through university wearing them. I would just buy more from my faculty club when they wore out. I am sure some of my classmates thought I wore the same two shirts for 4 years.

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      May 20, 2011 at 3:01 pm | # | Reply

      I have always called them baseball shirts. I went through university wearing them. I would just buy more from my faculty club when they wore out. I am sure some of my classmates thought I wore the same two shirts for 4 years.

    • Chrisby
      Chrisby
      May 20, 2011 at 9:01 pm | # | Reply

      Cool, thanks for the info guys.

  20. Dean
    Dean
    May 20, 2011 at 12:55 am | # | Reply

    I’m guessing that if Mike were ever baptized, the water would flash into steam before touching his skin. And then the church would burn down.

  21. Rikushadow5
    Rikushadow5
    May 20, 2011 at 1:04 am | # | Reply

    I can satisfyingly say, having heard the reports from friends over the years, that I have never eaten, nor been compelled to eat, at Arby’s.

    …but I get where Mike’s coming from. It’s happened before.

    Also, I’m not of the opinion that Mike was actually brought back to life. I think he just pulled some BAMF junk and crawled out of Hell/The Cheese/Whatever else happens to dead people in this continuity.

  22. Tekkactus
    Tekkactus
    May 20, 2011 at 1:16 am | # | Reply

    …Damnit Willis, now I’m hungry for some Arby’s.

  23. Darby O'Gill
    Darby O'Gill
    May 20, 2011 at 1:21 am | # | Reply

    Arby’s makes a tasty sandwich.

  24. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    May 20, 2011 at 1:22 am | # | Reply

    I for one am looking forward to the coming of the raptors, I am curious as to what the meat tastes like.

    • DCHorror
      DCHorror
      May 20, 2011 at 3:47 am | # | Reply

      Like fish, according to K.A. Applegate.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        May 20, 2011 at 6:04 am | # | Reply

        Like salmon, cod, whiting or shark?

        • Lesharo
          Lesharo
          May 20, 2011 at 10:52 am | # | Reply

          Like pollock. Simple, but sturdy.

  25. Crack-A-Toe-A
    Crack-A-Toe-A
    May 20, 2011 at 1:22 am | # | Reply

    All I know is that those Arby-Q sandwiches are delicious.

  26. agent_of_the_8
    agent_of_the_8
    May 20, 2011 at 1:25 am | # | Reply

    So, I’m totally calling firsties dibs on Tony Robbins mansion and all the items (cash, vehicles, food, weapons, etc., et al…) because he’s sure not gonna need ‘em, right?

    And Mel Gibson’s, too! Just in case…

    Lol!

    *Eagerly waiting for the battles between Hell’s Legion and Human’s Resistance.*

    *Ya’ know, if it happens.*

    *Kinda.*

  27. Erector
    Erector
    May 20, 2011 at 1:26 am | # | Reply

    Arby’s is no Jack in the Box.

    • DCHorror
      DCHorror
      May 20, 2011 at 3:50 am | # | Reply

      Is that really a good comparison? Isn’t Jack in the Box more akin to Hardees than Arby’s?

  28. Sonzilber
    Sonzilber
    May 20, 2011 at 1:47 am | # | Reply

    Now I am craving Arby’s

  29. brasca1
    brasca1
    May 20, 2011 at 1:48 am | # | Reply

    I don’t know why Arbys gets a bum rap. I guess it’s an acquired taste and gastro intestinal tolerance. I’ve never had any problems eating there. I’ve heard bad things about White Castle, but having never eaten there I cannot say whether their food is as bad as people say. Interesting that Mike likes Arby’s. Wonder if that makes me evil?

    • PeaceInOurTime
      PeaceInOurTime
      May 20, 2011 at 2:58 am | # | Reply

      I threw up for three days, starting right after eating lunch at an Arbys.

      Of course I had the stomach flu when it happened, but the association is still there…

      • Pat
        Pat
        May 20, 2011 at 1:16 pm | # | Reply

        The only time I got real sick while I was at college happened on a weekend right after I’d eaten some stir fry in the cafeteria.

        It was a make-your-own station, and I cooked it myself. I ate it like once a week. My friend saw me cooking it, commented on how it never came out right when she did it, and asked me to make her some, so I threw more ingredients in the pan and split it with her; despite the fact that she got sick all the time and had a weak stomach, she did not get sick after eating.

        So I was entirely certain that the food didn’t actually make me sick, but the association was still strong enough that I never made it again.
        It was pretty much the only thing in the cafeteria that was remotely healthy, too.

      • wdwillis
        wdwillis
        May 21, 2011 at 1:18 pm | # | Reply

        i used to live in oregon, and that happened to me everytime i ate at jack in the box. minus having the flu.
        i contracted food poisoning no less than 6 times at various jitb’s in the pacific northwest region. never will eat there again.
        i used to have the same problem with KFC, but apparently the corse moved to JITB since i haven’t gotten food poisoning from a KFC in over a decade.

    • DCHorror
      DCHorror
      May 20, 2011 at 3:56 am | # | Reply

      It’s definitely an acquired taste. I know people who love and hate White Castle. I don’t really care as much for it, but I grew up eating Krystals and there’s just that sort of difference.

    • Doctor Endy
      Doctor Endy
      May 20, 2011 at 2:23 pm | # | Reply

      The last time I ate at Arby’s, I was so sick to my stomach and nauseous for the entire following weekend that all I ate for the entire two days was a bowl of cereal and some macaroni and cheese at the end of the weekend when the symptoms were much less severe. That was it.

  30. Ridureyu
    Ridureyu
    May 20, 2011 at 1:51 am | # | Reply

    I fell asleep in an Arby’s once.

    I like to think of it as a low point in my life.

  31. Confuzor
    Confuzor
    May 20, 2011 at 1:52 am | # | Reply

    Wow…Mike feels emotions. That’s new ^_^

  32. Dahlia
    Dahlia
    May 20, 2011 at 1:53 am | # | Reply

    TONIGHT. WE DINE. IN HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    But tomorrow, I’m thinkin’ Arby’s! 8 D

    (omfg I can’t belive I commented here wtfwtfwtfwtfwtf…)

    • wnderjif
      wnderjif
      May 20, 2011 at 2:58 pm | # | Reply

      !

  33. Linkara
    Linkara
    May 20, 2011 at 2:30 am | # | Reply

    Mike, as Arby’s is my favorite fast food restaurant, I can assure you – I’ve been there, man. I’ve been there.

  34. Ancestral Hamster
    Ancestral Hamster
    May 20, 2011 at 3:12 am | # | Reply

    In the last panel, Mike looks weary, almost defeated, as if the relationship with Amber is wearing him down. Perhaps Amber is like water; eventually drop by drop, it will erode a mountain away.

    • Citysqwirl
      Citysqwirl
      May 20, 2011 at 10:28 am | # | Reply

      I was thinking the same thing — either Amber is sucking the life out of Mike . . . or LOVE is.

      • Ancestral Hamster
        Ancestral Hamster
        May 20, 2011 at 9:17 pm | # | Reply

        It’s probably LOVE, which is a pretty alien emotion for Mike, and so hard for him to cope with.

  35. John Biles
    John Biles
    May 20, 2011 at 3:26 am | # | Reply

    1) I like Arby’s.

    2) This reminds me so much of our old family vacations, except Mike didn’t mention poking each other every five minutes.

  36. Heavensrun
    Heavensrun
    May 20, 2011 at 4:36 am | # | Reply

    I think all of us non-crazy people should hide out on the 22nd, just to panic the gullible into thinking the rapture left them behind.

    • G.S.Mercs
      G.S.Mercs
      May 20, 2011 at 12:54 pm | # | Reply

      But…. I’ll miss my birthday :(

  37. OldsVistaCruiser
    OldsVistaCruiser
    May 20, 2011 at 4:42 am | # | Reply

    From 2003-2007, I organized the “Vista Cruise to Hell and Back”, where a bunch of owners and fans of the Vista Cruiser (yes, “That ’70s Show”) would camp out in the town of Hell, Michigan. There are three Arby’s somewhat near Hell – all are between 11 and 12 miles away. One is off of I-94, the second is off of I-96 and the third is off of interstate-grade US 23.

    When I used to live in Bucks County, PA, there was just one Arby’s on the way to my mom’s, and that was in Quakertown, PA. You had to drive 80 miles to her town and then go 4 miles further to the one in Palmyra, PA (the next town east of Hershey, PA).

    • wdwillis
      wdwillis
      May 21, 2011 at 1:26 pm | # | Reply

      i remember the scarcity of arby’s in the area… when i lived in chester county, the only arby’s i remember were in ephrata, off 272, and in the park city mall (both lancaster county)

  38. tiggerpete
    tiggerpete
    May 20, 2011 at 5:37 am | # | Reply

    yay, my archive diving is over, granted I had already read everything before, but now I read everything in context having gone back to Roomies! IW! and J&W! some things actually made more sense and I noticed a lot more foreshadowing and easter eggs that you notice on repeat readings

  39. Kamino Neko
    Kamino Neko
    May 20, 2011 at 6:00 am | # | Reply

    I notice the 2012 strikethru on the van…

    Which supports my belief that he’s come up with this date simply to take the wind out of the sails of the Mayan Calendar end of the world…

  40. Chaz
    Chaz
    May 20, 2011 at 6:10 am | # | Reply

    Hell is living 1 block from an Arby’s for 30 years, then finding out it burned down in the middle of the night. Now you crave Arby’s, but the nearest one is 10 miles away, and you have no car.

    • Doctor Who
      Doctor Who
      May 20, 2011 at 8:16 am | # | Reply

      This exact thing happened to me with the Taco Bell down the street.

      The funny thing is that they had just remodelled about a month before, but put up a sign to tell people. And when the place burnt down, the sign stayed up.

      I still have a photograph of the burnt out shell of the place, next to a sign saying “Check out our bold new look!” :)

      • agent_of_the_8
        agent_of_the_8
        May 20, 2011 at 12:57 pm | # | Reply

        That. Is. Epic. Lol!

        Had the same thing happen to a Burger King about 1/2 a mile from the apartment I rented in Las Vegas. They had redone the seating area, put in a sky-light, repainted the whole place, expanded their bathrooms… Hells, I even think they changed some of the kiddie play area… and had a sign similar to what you’d just said. Wish I knew which of my SD cards has the pic I took…

        Not like it was the only BK around Vegas, but it was my favorite because the peeps knew me (tried to stop in every other Wednesday night after my security surveillance shift ended) and they’d hook me up with an extra Whopper.

        *Sigh* :’(

      • Valdrax
        Valdrax
        May 22, 2011 at 1:38 pm | # | Reply

        That picture is just made for the Fail Blog. Post it now.

  41. palaeomerus
    palaeomerus
    May 20, 2011 at 8:04 am | # | Reply

    Arby’s is both a roast beef sandwich and a gentle, effective, natural laxative.

    • Lesharo
      Lesharo
      May 20, 2011 at 10:57 am | # | Reply

      “Gentle”? “Natural”?

      ((I have to give you “effective”))

  42. Silver C.
    Silver C.
    May 20, 2011 at 8:50 am | # | Reply

    Did my birthday just happen? Been re-reading the archive lately to satisfy my Amber-Mike fix and it happens today! ♥

  43. ziggy78eog
    ziggy78eog
    May 20, 2011 at 9:07 am | # | Reply

    Wait, what? How did Mike’s Arbys analogy of Hell turn into his love for Amber? The Mariner Valley on Mars is not even wide enough to encompass that gap.

    • Phes
      Phes
      May 20, 2011 at 11:40 am | # | Reply

      Re-read what Mike said, remembering that “you”=”Amber” and not a nonspecific person.

    • Clare Claymore
      Clare Claymore
      May 20, 2011 at 12:14 pm | # | Reply

      Mike’s Arby Hell (which would be a great name for a song) turned into his love for Amber because the whole analogy seems to have come out of a car ride that he and Amber took back from Amber’s mom’s house, therefore making it seem that he has suffered through his version of hell for her. Not a big gap to bridge, actually.

  44. Doom Shepherd
    Doom Shepherd
    May 20, 2011 at 9:28 am | # | Reply

    I have two Arbys within 10 minutes drive. Heaven.

  45. ADHadh
    ADHadh
    May 20, 2011 at 10:39 am | # | Reply

    No Arby’s in this part of the world; is it hell or blissfulness of ignorance?

  46. amurana
    amurana
    May 20, 2011 at 11:38 am | # | Reply

    There are no Arbys in England. I miss them more than I miss some of my stateside friends.

  47. Jabberwocky
    Jabberwocky
    May 20, 2011 at 11:38 am | # | Reply

    I do believe this is the funniest thing I have ever read.

  48. Paul
    Paul
    May 20, 2011 at 12:19 pm | # | Reply

    Wow, hell is surprisingly similar to real life… wait a second.

    • Kamino Neko
      Kamino Neko
      May 20, 2011 at 2:27 pm | # | Reply

      You often have occasion to visit Amber’s mom?

  49. taekwondogirl
    taekwondogirl
    May 20, 2011 at 12:26 pm | # | Reply

    I’ve never been an Arby’s fan. I remember my parents going there a lot when I was a youngin’ and getting Babar toys. That was my favorite part about it. But then again, I’m not a big fan of roast beef. :|

    • Valdrax
      Valdrax
      May 22, 2011 at 1:36 pm | # | Reply

      Unless you don’t like meat (or red meat) in general, I highly recommend going to a deli and getting some roast beef there before passing that final judgment. What Arby’s serves is to roast beef what squeeze cheese is to real cheese.

  50. Kamendae
    Kamendae
    May 20, 2011 at 2:55 pm | # | Reply

    Am I the only one who immediately thought of this?

    http://cheezburger.com/Asset/View/?ciid=2036476

  51. airfox
    airfox
    May 20, 2011 at 3:20 pm | # | Reply

    Arby’s is fantastic. Sadly I only get to eat there if one happens to be nearby when I travel to the U.S. … and there doesn’t seem to be a single one nearby from the Pasadena Convention Center. :(

    -airfox

  52. izzatrix
    izzatrix
    May 20, 2011 at 3:43 pm | # | Reply

    I think he’s off by 4.5 billion years myself.http://library.thinkquest.org/27930/stars.htm

  53. minimus-minor
    minimus-minor
    May 20, 2011 at 3:43 pm | # | Reply

    Are we to assume, since this is the Walkyverse, that if Arby’s (never heard of it till now) is Hell, then Taco Bell is heaven?

  54. Slade
    Slade
    May 20, 2011 at 4:10 pm | # | Reply

    Oh thank god! 6 years of archives, DONE! And just in time for the end of the world. Great read though, can’t wait continue reading ShortPacked!, really hit home being a former TRU employee.

    Now, time for some Arby’s…

  55. SolegitRR
    SolegitRR
    May 20, 2011 at 5:51 pm | # | Reply

    I love Mike. I just wish he didn’t remind me so much of myself sometimes…

  56. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    May 20, 2011 at 6:59 pm | # | Reply

    It is the 21st here in Australia and there are no reports of large numbers of missing people, so suck on that Family Radio.

    • David Willis
      David Willis
      May 20, 2011 at 7:30 pm | # | Reply

      It doesn’t happen until 6pm local time, starting at 6pm on the International Date Line and going west, hour by hour.

      • Silver C.
        Silver C.
        May 20, 2011 at 8:32 pm | # | Reply

        !

        This means I have time to get old clothes and shoes that I plan on getting rid of and scatter them across the city in ways that makes people think that their human body has up and disappeared leaving their clothes..

        • taekwondogirl
          taekwondogirl
          May 21, 2011 at 12:28 pm | # | Reply

          That is awesome except I’m not certain if people would get it. :(

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        May 20, 2011 at 11:12 pm | # | Reply

        I jumped the gun did I? That explains why there was no outcry over missing people.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        May 21, 2011 at 6:48 pm | # | Reply

        This time I know the end of the world didn’t happen as it is the 22nd over here.

  57. J.P.
    J.P.
    May 20, 2011 at 7:46 pm | # | Reply

    You know, I was about to go get dinner at Taco Bell, but Arby’s is a block closer. See what you’ve done Willis? You’ve caused me to doubt my faith in the Bell!

  58. Allie
    Allie
    May 20, 2011 at 7:52 pm | # | Reply

    Oh Mike, I love you.

  59. BrokenProducts
    BrokenProducts
    May 20, 2011 at 10:59 pm | # | Reply

    I wanna see Mike drink Holy Water and see if he burns.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      May 20, 2011 at 11:20 pm | # | Reply

      We already know that alcohol can temporarily ‘purify’ Mike, maybe if he had some Holy Water, he will become like Drunk Mike all the time.

  60. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    May 20, 2011 at 11:17 pm | # | Reply

    There is one restaurant I miss and that is Sizzlers, especially the All You Can Eat Buffet.

  61. optimus paws
    optimus paws
    May 21, 2011 at 2:58 am | # | Reply

    Damn. We don’t have arby’s (with or without apostrophe? arbies? arbi for plural?) or Wendys in New Zealand. Well, we do have a wendys but I don’t think it’s the same. It only does milkshakes and icecream. Also I will stay by the computer all night so if we get raptured here first, I can hit enter and send a message to warn you all.
    You’re welcome.

    • gradoc
      gradoc
      May 22, 2011 at 6:48 pm | # | Reply

      I think we do have a non-icecream Wendy’s in New Zealand, or at least used to. It’s in Auckland somewhere. There’s rumours that one may be opening in Porirua but I haven’t seen anything concrete. We do get ads on TV here in Wellington sometimes which is rather frustrating.

      • gradoc
        gradoc
        May 22, 2011 at 6:50 pm | # | Reply

        Oooh here is evidence: http://www.wendys.co.nz/#/locations/
        Plus there seems to be one in Christchurch too

  62. lost_limey
    lost_limey
    May 21, 2011 at 3:26 am | # | Reply

    Arby’s (at least the ones in Richmond, VA) are easily the grossest of the fast food chains. I can eat just about anything fast food and choke it down with no ill effects, but Arby’s roast “beef” is just awful.

    Popeye’s Chicken & Cajun Fries though, pure calorific bliss…

  63. Cope
    Cope
    May 21, 2011 at 5:13 am | # | Reply

    Just letting you guys know that the east coast of Australia is still here.

  64. The Aussie Bloke
    The Aussie Bloke
    May 21, 2011 at 7:39 am | # | Reply

    As is the west coast of Australia.

    Hell is spending 18 months getting a Large Mega Choc Sundae from Wendy’s Ice Cream during your work break every shift, only to move away and discover that the mega choc sundae is only available at that particular store.
    Seriously. I’ve checked Wendy’s in another town and three seperate suburbs. No mega choc. Sadness.

  65. Sili
    Sili
    May 21, 2011 at 8:02 am | # | Reply

    I’m mildly surprised that Mike’s an atheist – I’d have thought he could be a bigger arsehole as a fundie.

    • Touchfuzzy
      Touchfuzzy
      May 22, 2011 at 8:59 am | # | Reply

      You obviously haven’t met some of the atheists I have.

    • Valdrax
      Valdrax
      May 22, 2011 at 1:31 pm | # | Reply

      Please, you get atheist zealots which are just as obnoxious too. Just substitute “delusional and stupid” for “evil and damned to Hell,” and the intent and rhetoric are mostly the same. (See the writings of Richard Dawkins, for example.)

      Mike just probably doesn’t spend too much time mocking people’s religions because it’s really, really hard to make funny without sounding like the writer is an ass IRL.

  66. Fata Morgana
    Fata Morgana
    May 21, 2011 at 12:28 pm | # | Reply

    You know, I just realized that Catholics have an idea (a non-canon idea, in the literal meaning of the word “canon”) that is pretty much the exact opposite of the rapture, called the three days of darkness. Three days of (supernatural) darkness in which devils will roam the earth killing people. Only blessed candles with give light, nothing mechanical or electronic will work, and anyone un-righteous will die. Even the righteous will die if they are outside when it happens or look outside. It will be a severely horrifying thing to endure, and the only way to survive it is to hide at home praying continuously with your blessed candle lit, having holy water sprinkled around your doors. At the end of it, the population will be severely reduced and only good people will be left, after which will follow 1,000 years of peace.

    • airfox
      airfox
      May 23, 2011 at 9:00 pm | # | Reply

      Catholic here. Haven’t heard or read of that until now.

      -airfox

  67. Ridureyu
    Ridureyu
    May 21, 2011 at 12:48 pm | # | Reply

    Well, it’s after 6 PM in Jerusalem.
    I dunno, I’d expect that they would kinda be at the front of the line for this.

  68. taekwondogirl
    taekwondogirl
    May 21, 2011 at 6:15 pm | # | Reply

    If I lived in Australia I would have made fake news reports to screw with the rest of the world.

  69. quietdevious1
    quietdevious1
    May 21, 2011 at 9:01 pm | # | Reply

    Well, it’s now 6 pm on the west coast of Canada, and as I look outside I see… hey, it stopped raining!

    <3 Mike's cheeks are flushed

  70. KiZeR
    KiZeR
    May 22, 2011 at 12:16 am | # | Reply

    Looks like I didn’t make the celestial guest list. Is it October yet?

  71. XLR
    XLR
    May 22, 2011 at 7:05 am | # | Reply

    The next day We’re still alive!
    What a shock!

    • SilentSooYun
      SilentSooYun
      May 22, 2011 at 8:36 am | # | Reply

      This is a triumph.

      • Zem
        Zem
        May 23, 2011 at 7:43 pm | # | Reply

        I’m making a note here: “huge success”.

  72. Macker
    Macker
    May 22, 2011 at 9:27 am | # | Reply

    That is certainly one interpretation of Hell. Here’s another.

  73. Shameless
    Shameless
    May 25, 2011 at 4:15 pm | # | Reply

    I’m so hungry, I could eat at Arby’s.

  74. SheWhoGames
    SheWhoGames
    August 19, 2011 at 10:20 am | # | Reply

    OMG. I *totally* did that Arby’s thing the last time I drove from the East Coast to Texas. Went through three states before I found one.

  75. Black Ice
    Black Ice
    December 29, 2011 at 7:59 am | # | Reply

    God are they cute.

  76. Doug Puthoff
    Doug Puthoff
    January 21, 2013 at 11:48 pm | # | Reply

    Hell is Westview, OH, setting of the comic strip FUNKY WINKERBEAN.

  77. Beastlybro7
    Beastlybro7
    February 25, 2013 at 5:26 pm | # | Reply

    I can relate to Mike on this one

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