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Spastic

by David Willis on November 15, 2010 at 12:01 am
  • 05 - NEWW 2010 comics

└ Tags: drew, ethan, singularikitty, spastic, transformers

Discussion (138) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. David Herbert
    David Herbert
    November 15, 2010 at 12:04 am | # | Reply

    Spastic is used down in Australia too. It’s pretty much the same as ‘retarded.’

    • frosgrok
      frosgrok
      November 15, 2010 at 3:42 am | # | Reply

      At least from my youth, here in the USA (west coast) it means the exact same thing, at least as an “insult”.

      It comes from the jerky muscle contractions from any number of conditions. So one can talk of a spastic colon (or other things) and it just means “twitchy”. But referring to someone, it means mentally defective (or at least awkward).

      As does spaz and a number of other words.

      Seems a bit odd to name a toy that. Mostly because I can’t think of any positive connotation. But compared to some of the advertisements I’ve seen – it is only mildly stupid.

  2. TheTurnipKing
    TheTurnipKing
    November 15, 2010 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

    I wondered if this might show up here. I now totally want him to be called Darwin, even more than Spastic.

  3. Misie
    Misie
    November 15, 2010 at 12:10 am | # | Reply

    Awesome! Just in time to revise Social Values with my Media class :)

  4. Dedlok
    Dedlok
    November 15, 2010 at 12:11 am | # | Reply

    So the cat is being called Singularikitty? At least for now? I approve.

  5. Dedlok
    Dedlok
    November 15, 2010 at 12:12 am | # | Reply

    Infact it gives me an idea for a City of Heroes character lol. Probably will never be made but still.

  6. Bryy
    Bryy
    November 15, 2010 at 12:13 am | # | Reply

    Love it. I want the book now.

  7. samuel
    samuel
    November 15, 2010 at 12:16 am | # | Reply

    Win.

    Alternatively, it could have been named “Any Science that Doesn’t Make Bombs, Fast Cars, and Neato Consumer Gadgets”.

    Or “Global Warming”.

    Or “Born Homosexual”. I never understood the issue over this one anyway.

    Or “Paleontology”. The devil put those Dinosaur bones there.

    • SC
      SC
      November 15, 2010 at 12:17 am | # | Reply

      Or “Sharing.”

      • samuel
        samuel
        November 15, 2010 at 12:37 am | # | Reply

        That’s Socialism, Commie.

        • Thoughtwanderer
          Thoughtwanderer
          November 15, 2010 at 10:45 am | # | Reply

          Two Captain Americas having an argument about communism? My rejected storyline pitch to Marvel has come true!

          • Liz
            Liz
            November 15, 2010 at 11:21 am | # | Reply

            Ditto.

    • electricmulch
      electricmulch
      November 15, 2010 at 11:29 am | # | Reply

      Atheist Lesbian Liberal Anchor baby. With Realistic Flag-burning action!

    • Jarekk
      Jarekk
      September 10, 2011 at 2:19 am | # | Reply

      No no no no no… -God- put those dinosaur bones there, to test our faith. We have to have enough faith that we disbelieve what we see, and instead believe what some guy wrote in a book.

  8. Ragnal
    Ragnal
    November 15, 2010 at 12:20 am | # | Reply

    I thought only the Christians were offended by Darwin’s theory of evolution.

    • Prior Semblance
      Prior Semblance
      November 15, 2010 at 2:07 am | # | Reply

      Being christian doesn’t automatically make you hate evolution, lots of people believe god created evolution. But of course the vocal group is the ones who hate it.

      • Malcolm
        Malcolm
        November 15, 2010 at 3:24 am | # | Reply

        Indeed. I’m Christian, and believe in evolution. I still believe God created everything, but that doesn’t mean he just snapped his ‘fingers’ and made it happened. Faith just fills the gaps of knowledge, and provides the extra support needed in life.

        Trouble is, I live in the bible belt, and there are people who believe ‘If Evolution is true, God doesn’t exist’ or ‘If God exists, evolution isn’t true’ I don’t see why there cant be central ground… I try to explain it to my family, who raise bulldogs. When they breed for certain traits in their dogs, THATS evolution. Just happening naturally, and over long periods of time.

        • Michael
          Michael
          November 15, 2010 at 5:21 am | # | Reply

          Sigh. The point of the evolution thing has nothing to do with natural science. It has to do with an arbitrary social order which can’t be enforced unless God Made It Happen. It’s not about bulldogs. It’s about women.

        • Thomas Wrobel
          Thomas Wrobel
          November 15, 2010 at 9:40 am | # | Reply

          Indeed.
          I’m agnostic myself, but It seems far more likely any hyper-intelligent devine being would use evolution in the same way we use a screwdriver.
          Or maybe not even that, maybe this being would just set the fundamental constants of the universe like a computer program, and watch it all play out like a fractal.
          Evolution doesn’t prevent a god existing, it just removes the necessity for one to explain how life got more complex. Those that believe the two are mutaly exclusive seem to either;
          a) Missunderstand what evolution means (“how are apes still here if we evolved from them”)
          or b) Don’t have as much faith as they think they have as they require “proof” by the virtue of their complex bodys.

          It also seeems many people just lack so much imagination. By all means believe stuff, but theres a million possibility’s out there! Even within all the evidence and science we have toward, theres plenty of possibility’s without contradictions! :)

        • Stolen
          Stolen
          November 15, 2010 at 9:45 am | # | Reply

          TECHNICALLY, when they breed for certain traits in bulldogs, thats selective breeding. but i get the point you’re trying to make :P

          • Malcolm
            Malcolm
            November 15, 2010 at 11:36 am | # | Reply

            XD Thanks. I’m not really a science major, and I’m explaining it to my grandmother who barely got a high school education. So I use broad strokes, not only to cover for my lack of knowledge, but hers as well. :3

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          November 15, 2010 at 11:01 am | # | Reply

          The bot’s not named Evolution. He’s named Darwinian Evolution. As in, “Natural Selection”. It’s utterly and completely incompatible with godly direction at a philosophical level, in precisely the same way that any theory of natural law is incompatible with the belief that it’s only that way at some god’s whim and could change at any moment when it changes it’s mind.

          Directed evolution ain’t evolution. Actual evolutionary theory includes the part where it’s caused by natural processes (which the theory proceeds to explain in detail). The thing theists who don’t think the dinosaur bones were planted by Satan (or God) is, is called “breeding”.

          • Derik
            Derik
            November 15, 2010 at 11:59 pm | # | Reply

            Strictly speaking, since Atechnogenesis is incorrect internal to the TFU, this would make the Autobot named Darwinian Evolution WRONG.

            …as long as you put that in his tech-spec, I think you could get away with the name.

            (If anything Transformers could be said to display Lamarkian Evolution….)

    • Andrusi
      Andrusi
      November 15, 2010 at 9:14 am | # | Reply

      The sort of Christians who are offended by evolution are generally also the sort of Christians who say “THIS IS A CHRISTIAN NATION.”

  9. Jimmy
    Jimmy
    November 15, 2010 at 12:26 am | # | Reply

    How about “Christian”? Seems to be about as offensive to the other side as well (just playing devil’s advocate here).

    • David Willis
      David Willis
      November 15, 2010 at 12:36 am | # | Reply

      Don’t be ridiculous. Americans are overwhelmingly Christian.

      • Jon
        Jon
        November 15, 2010 at 12:52 am | # | Reply

        Unless you’re a right wing Christian, in which case, we’re being overrun by atheistic gay Muslims! Nooooooooo!

        • No0ne
          No0ne
          November 15, 2010 at 2:40 am | # | Reply

          This is why I hav a walk in closet entierly for my assult weapons. :O

          No not really… although it would be awsome…

          • frosgrok
            frosgrok
            November 15, 2010 at 3:28 am | # | Reply

            Closet shmozet

            I know folks with drive in basements for their weapons. I do think the fellow with the WWII anti-aircraft gun (plus ammo and carrier) was just a tad over the top, but this is AMERICA baby! Our little old ladies could take out some countries’ armies.

            Goodness knows Ma could’ve.

          • Richie9999
            Richie9999
            November 15, 2010 at 8:55 am | # | Reply

            Pfft. My neighbor has a room in his basement full of weapons including a .30 cal machine gun, a .50 cal Barrett, and a f*#$ing CANNON.

    • samuel
      samuel
      November 15, 2010 at 12:55 am | # | Reply

      I spent a few months in England a few years ago.

      Christianity itself wasn’t looked down on at all. Many people I met identified themselves as Christian.

      The difference is there’s a completely different flavour of Christianity over there. In the UK, it was a very casual, laid back thing. Very quiet, and deeply personal. Most people didn’t walk around with their Christian identity on their shoulder, and most didn’t expect their personal religion to have a voice in Government.

      It was also a very liberal thing, relative to us. Many Christians I met supported the many social programs of the country, and didn’t have the hostile attitude towards gay people that’s so prominent here. Additionally, identifying oneself as an atheist didn’t provoke the scorn and instant mistrust it does over here.

      What’s taboo is the hyper-politicized, ultra conservative, fire and brimstone Christianity we have. It’s viewed with much suspicion. It has a lot to do with the history of England. To sum it up, there’s been a lot of turmoil(THIS IS AN UNDERSTATEMENT) every time religion gets involved in government over there, and a lot of people I met would rather avoid it altogether.

      • LurkerAbove
        LurkerAbove
        November 15, 2010 at 1:38 am | # | Reply

        Indeed. The English have a long history (longer than USA’s 300 years). Sometimes it’s good to take some lessons from the past.

        I do hear that UK is as paranoid about child sex offenders as the US though. :P

      • Ejigantor
        Ejigantor
        November 15, 2010 at 1:52 am | # | Reply

        –cue Eddie Izzard ‘Church of England’ bit

        • samuel
          samuel
          November 15, 2010 at 1:54 am | # | Reply

          Exactly, Ejigantor.

        • samuel
          samuel
          November 15, 2010 at 3:52 am | # | Reply

          Also, Ejigantor, you’re avatar is made of win.

          • samuel
            samuel
            November 15, 2010 at 3:53 am | # | Reply

            Grammar fail for me.

      • Kamino Neko
        Kamino Neko
        November 15, 2010 at 3:17 am | # | Reply

        I think he’s talking about ‘the other side’ in the US’s debates on evolution.

        It’s a ridiculous strawman, of course, since anti-Creationist arguments don’t have jack to do with Christianity, the majority of non-Creationists in the US are still Christians.

        • samuel
          samuel
          November 15, 2010 at 3:48 am | # | Reply

          Kamino, there’s a mild pronoun reference error there.

          This comment system can be unclear at times, so I try to use specific names for clarity.

      • Ethan Shuster
        Ethan Shuster
        November 15, 2010 at 8:49 am | # | Reply

        I’d like to point out that I have found that many, many Americans treat religion in the very same way you’re describing. It’s just the loudest ones that get the press. In some regions and some kinds of Christianity, it is more obvious, but there are many Church-going Americans who keep it to themselves for the most part.

      • gwalla
        gwalla
        November 15, 2010 at 11:49 am | # | Reply

        and most didn’t expect their personal religion to have a voice in Government.

        Except, um…it does over there. The highest ranking clergy in the Church of England automatically get seats in the House of Lords.

        Of course, the House of Lords really doesn’t do much of anything anymore, but still.

      • Jason
        Jason
        November 15, 2010 at 12:00 pm | # | Reply

        Oh my. Thank you very much for posting that- I’ve never really had a comparison of the way Christianity is in our two countries.
        It was very spot on. Especially the way we view the fire-and-brimstone type of Christianity which is too common in America. In fact, that basically shapes the majority of the views on America, over here.

        (Yeah, sorry guys. We basically hate your country because of the fundies etc. Well, that and McDonalds.)

        • gwalla
          gwalla
          November 15, 2010 at 4:55 pm | # | Reply

          It isn’t really that common in America. It’s just louder, and politically useful to certain groups, who’ve found that those types will reliably vote for them if pandered to, and can be used to guilt-trip a lot of less in-your-face believers.

    • Michael
      Michael
      November 15, 2010 at 1:52 pm | # | Reply

      Ah, the Eternal Conservative Victimhood Complex. Nobody understands the pain of the man who cannot be happy unless everyone else bows to his every whim.

      • gwalla
        gwalla
        November 15, 2010 at 4:57 pm | # | Reply

        Not to mention the Modern Christian Martyrdom Complex, the firm belief that despite overwhelming numbers and a great deal of political power, they’re still the ones getting thrown to the lions.

        • Michael
          Michael
          November 15, 2010 at 10:02 pm | # | Reply

          Same story — because they are so superior to all of the rest of us, any constraints on their ability to dictate our behavior are totally morally wrong.

    • Jimmy
      Jimmy
      November 16, 2010 at 12:15 am | # | Reply

      My point is that something deemed to be offensive can be spun any way you like. I have friends and family on both sides of the coin that take the other side’s viewpoints too personal. I think it’s okay to have a healthy debate on issues, but when the left and right become paranoid about the opposition (which is where it seems to have gone) they just become caricatures and no real value is gained. Maybe this isn’t the place for my soap box but that’s just my opinion.

  10. John
    John
    November 15, 2010 at 12:34 am | # | Reply

    I think Fag Smoker would work better, if you remember the British meaning of the word anyway…

    • Trevor
      Trevor
      November 15, 2010 at 1:24 am | # | Reply

      Yes! Win!

    • Brendan
      Brendan
      November 15, 2010 at 8:07 am | # | Reply

      Yes… but that wouldn’t have been funny.

  11. Milosh
    Milosh
    November 15, 2010 at 1:28 am | # | Reply

    Since when is something taught in pretty much all American schools supposed to be unspeakably offensive to America as a whole?

    It’s just a joke, blah blah blah. I just don’t get how it’s supposed to be funny.

    • Cholma
      Cholma
      November 15, 2010 at 1:54 am | # | Reply

      Congrats! This means you don’t live in Kansas, and that you don’t know any of the proponents of “Intelligent Design” *gag* who are pushing for it to be taught in schools.

      These people forget that:
      Public Schools = Truth & Science (but unfortunately, Politics often overrides the teaching of some things; such as History and Economics)
      Church Schools = Religious beliefs

      One shouldn’t be taught in the other, except as impartial study (like the World Religions class I once took. It didn’t judge or claim any were right; it just familiarized you with the history and basis of each)

      • Milosh
        Milosh
        November 15, 2010 at 2:01 am | # | Reply

        I know all about the people pushing to not teach evolution in public schools. I just don’t get how insisting that “Americans” (spoken as a whole) would find evolutionary science to be “unspeakably offensive” is funny.

        • Michael
          Michael
          November 15, 2010 at 5:23 am | # | Reply

          Right, because you don’t understand how grossly offensive the conservative “We are the only Real Americans” schtick is. That’s one layer of the joke.

          • JesseJanitect
            JesseJanitect
            November 15, 2010 at 11:31 am | # | Reply

            Exactly! It’s so frickin’ irritating how those McCarthiest blowhards insist that disagreeing with them is a sign of dangerous un-Americanism. Walking through the creationist museum is pretty hilarious (if a little scary) if you’re one of the “unreal Americans” who, y’know, possesses common sense though.

      • No0ne
        No0ne
        November 15, 2010 at 2:37 am | # | Reply

        and now… you know my pain…

      • Michael
        Michael
        November 15, 2010 at 5:24 am | # | Reply

        I support Intelligent Falling. Gravity is just a theory.

    • Ejigantor
      Ejigantor
      November 15, 2010 at 1:55 am | # | Reply

      It’s not offensive to all americans, but it would be to the portion who insist that the subject NOT be taught in schools.

      Of course, that segment of the population is smaller than most people think, but they make so much noise they seem bigger than they are. Those who yell loudest and longest get the most attention, and those of us with reason don’t have the energy to match their “conviction”

  12. Aesir
    Aesir
    November 15, 2010 at 1:33 am | # | Reply

    This is one of the rare comics that actually made me literally laugh out loud :D

    I’m British, but I don’t actually find Spastic an offensive name, it just depends on which people you talk to really, but the majority would find it offensive of course

    • LiamKav
      LiamKav
      November 15, 2010 at 5:30 am | # | Reply

      Hang on, how can you be British and not find “spastic” offensive? I mean I can understand if you use as an insult, because if delivered carefully it can be very funny, but that doesn’t make it unoffensive.

      (Out of curiousity, what IS the meaning of it in the US?)

      • Malisteen
        Malisteen
        November 15, 2010 at 6:27 am | # | Reply

        In the US, “spastic” means “hyper, overexcited, or overstimulated, to the point of being jittery or twitchy”, like a person who’s had too much caffeine.

        Least, that’s how I’ve heard it used. What does it mean in the UK? earlier in the thread someone said it was an epithet for the mentally disabled. Would that make Spastic the first cannon ‘retardicon’?

        • Aesir
          Aesir
          November 15, 2010 at 8:12 am | # | Reply

          Basically it means a mentally retarded person, originally it was just a medical term (there was even a “spastics society”) but some kids decided to make it a “rude” word on day and it stuck basically

          I don’t find it offensive because:
          1) I’ve been personally called it because of my speech, and showing that it offends you makes things worse
          2) if you encourage the reusage of a word as a negative term it just ruins the original meaning

          • LiamKav
            LiamKav
            November 17, 2010 at 5:29 am | # | Reply

            Spastic I thought specifically referred to people with cerebal palsey, and more generally to anyone with speech or movement related issues.

            “if you encourage the reusage of a word as a negative term it just ruins the original meaning”

            I do applaud thesentiment, but that boat sailed long, long ago. It’d be like starting a campaign to get the original meaning of “idiot” back. Or “negro”.

            • tahrey
              tahrey
              October 15, 2011 at 11:47 am | # | Reply

              Glad to see someone brought that up, even if a ways down the page. It’s not that it’s slang for “retarded” in a joking sense, it LITERALLY was the common term for a form of hereditary mental handicap. One that doesn’t get used much in this politically correct era because it’s seen as quite a derogatory label.

              It’d be a bit like calling a transformer “cripple”, or “mongoloid”. Really not a good idea.

        • Felinephoenix
          Felinephoenix
          November 15, 2010 at 7:21 pm | # | Reply

          Actually, whether or not spaz is used as an ableist insult depends on where you live in the US from what I’ve heard. No one ever used it to mock me for my cerebral palsy (for being a nervous wreck, though…) but I have friends who’ve had it used against them that way.

          I suspect it’s also an age thing. I didn’t even learn about the negative connotations until I was older.

    • TheTurnipKing
      TheTurnipKing
      November 15, 2010 at 7:27 am | # | Reply

      Actually, most probably _don’t_ care that much, but as always, there is a vocal minority, and in fairness to the people who make up that vocal minority… people who actually live with spasticity or people who live with people who live with spasticity, none of us really want to be the one to tell them that they’re overreacting to something like this.

  13. Malcolm
    Malcolm
    November 15, 2010 at 1:52 am | # | Reply

    … the UK name should be Tea Bag. XD

    • DCHorror
      DCHorror
      November 15, 2010 at 2:06 am | # | Reply

      But that’s not offensive.

  14. DCHorror
    DCHorror
    November 15, 2010 at 2:09 am | # | Reply

    I don’t think that it’s funny cause the new name was offensive. I think it’s funny cause before you read the name, you ran through a list of names that you thought every american found offensive.

    His name should be Politician.

    • Someone
      Someone
      November 15, 2010 at 2:36 am | # | Reply

      You’re just being silly, now. We love our politicians. Just as deeply as they love us. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m sore and can’t remember where I left my life savings. :/

      • Thenodrin
        Thenodrin
        November 15, 2010 at 8:40 am | # | Reply

        “We love our politicians. Just as deeply as they love us.”

        Truer words have never been spoken.

        Theno

  15. No0ne
    No0ne
    November 15, 2010 at 2:46 am | # | Reply

    OH NOEZ I HAVE TO STOP READING SHORTPACKED NOW CAUSE MR. WILLIS USED D******** E********. HE IS TRYING TO USE HIS STATUS AS A MAN OF THE MEDIA TO RUN OUR CHILDREN’S RESPECT FOR GOD!

    Which brings me to this laughable point about Amercians and media. People always complain about how the media always slants their stores in a way to futher their potical goals right? Well I hate to pint this out but the whole reason people started newspapers was because they wanted to tell people about how greaty their political party was, or they had a message to be heard. So why is it that people complain about media being pro one party over the other? Don’t they bother to read a histroy book at all their entire lives?

    • Stephen
      Stephen
      November 15, 2010 at 12:07 pm | # | Reply

      Your post + that icon = WIN!

    • Wizard
      Wizard
      November 15, 2010 at 1:20 pm | # | Reply

      No, they don’t. Although in fairness, some people’s biggest complaint isn’t media bias in itself, but the media’s collective hypocrisy about their bias. That is, reporters like to brag about their independence and objectivity, even though they definitely have a point of view and any observant reader or viewer can easily see what it is. I for one have no problem with reporters and commentators having opinions or trying to advance their own beliefs, I just wish they’d be a little more honest about it.

      • Doom Shepherd
        Doom Shepherd
        November 15, 2010 at 7:44 pm | # | Reply

        It’s not their bias which gets to me, it’s outright LAZINESS.

        It’s when “journalists” fabricate stories out of whole cloth, because they’re just too lazy to do real work, or to check their source’s credibility, or check any facts at all.

        But heck, that goes all the way back to Duranty’s puff pieces on the Soviet Union (that he won a Pulitzer for), to the “Bush said God told him to invade Iraq” story, and shows no signs of slowing.

  16. Carapace
    Carapace
    November 15, 2010 at 3:12 am | # | Reply

    Yeah, Spastic is as offensive as Retard. Since they are both actual words that have actual meanings. They describe medical conditions. As an actual practicing Spaz, I resent the heck out of all you normal-nerved jerkheads using it as an excuse for your own pathetic failure. It’s *my* excuse for pathetic failure! Can’t Normal People just blame booze or something?

    Actually, I would adore this bot if he turns out to actually be prone to seizures. And he can turn into a Short Bus! His power is being Inspirational!

  17. Mel
    Mel
    November 15, 2010 at 3:30 am | # | Reply

    This is true, the word “spastic” is really offensive here, although I have no idea why o__O
    (yerr I’m a brit reader 8D)

  18. frosgrok
    frosgrok
    November 15, 2010 at 4:12 am | # | Reply

    Looking over the posts, I was trying to come up with something that would be offensive to “all” (say 97% + ) Americans.

    Evolution (while a bit funny) isn’t really. I doubt even a majority of Christians have a big problem with it.

    Ditto most of the above. Most of the minorities have grabbed the derogatory names for themselves and ran with them. Gays using “fag” is pretty common. And the “N” word (that none dare print) is so common among black youth that I’m pretty sure they would have to stop and think hard not to use it.

    So for real: What would it be? (bonus if other countries don’t find it, or its translation, offensive)

    Pedophile is the only one I could come up with. And, given the number of jokes about it I’m not even that sure on it.

    A Transformer named PedoBear! I just KNOW somebody is going to do a mod of that last panel with it.

    • Ristar
      Ristar
      November 15, 2010 at 8:27 am | # | Reply

      If mike was naming it, it would have been named “Nickel Mom”

      • Just Random
        Just Random
        November 19, 2010 at 10:06 am | # | Reply

        “God Fucked Your Mom”?

    • Thomas Wrobel
      Thomas Wrobel
      November 15, 2010 at 10:08 am | # | Reply

      Thats quite hard.
      Maybe something political like “progressive” or “socialist” which in europe is just a descriptive term, but seems to be used mostly in insulting ways in the US. (allthough the web isn’t a particularly good benchmark, I got a chuckle out of someone commenting about Apple patent-trolling and calling them socialist….a socialist patent troll? :P )

      Still not 97% though, but probably a lot more then evolution related terms.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      November 15, 2010 at 11:03 am | # | Reply

      Easy. “Nigger Fucker”.

    • MrGBH
      MrGBH
      November 15, 2010 at 12:06 pm | # | Reply

      To achieve 97% of Americans taking offence, he should be called Atheist.

    • gwalla
      gwalla
      November 15, 2010 at 12:09 pm | # | Reply

      It’s not uncommon for derogatory terms to be reclaimed by the populations they malign. That doesn’t mean they’re not offensive when used by a person in the out-group though.

  19. palaeomerus
    palaeomerus
    November 15, 2010 at 4:16 am | # | Reply

    Saying “spastic” in the UK is sort of like saying “cunt” in the USA in terms it being regarded as a very distasteful word that brings shame on the person who uses it publicly.

    • Jason
      Jason
      November 15, 2010 at 12:08 pm | # | Reply

      …To be fair, “cunt” is hardly considered a pleasant word over here either. But yes, the word “spastic” is very much frowned upon. It was a cruel insult that became commonly used, disregarding the difficulties of mental health. (Basically, the term is most commonly used to describe someone, well… mentally retarded. Except in a very cruel way.)

      It’s been compared to the word “nigger”, except that is just… not said here. It’s not really that big a deal because nobody says it- if it was slipped into a conversation, it’s possible the listener would need half a second to realise what was said before they had any other emotional reaction.

      I was going to keep explaining but it turned rambly and I expect most people will go “tl;dr” anyway.

    • Derik
      Derik
      November 16, 2010 at 12:09 am | # | Reply

      Saying “spastic” in the UK is sort of like saying “cunt” in the USA
      No, saying “spastic” in the UK is sort of like saying “slag” in the UK.

      …which Ethan really should be bringing up, as the counter-point to this. (Mostly since his white liberal guilt demands he give Hasbro grudging belated Kudos for that decision, even though slag is a perfectly cormulent word and no sane person would think it was being used in that context.)

      • tahrey
        tahrey
        October 15, 2011 at 11:53 am | # | Reply

        Difference being that Slag is a perfectly acceptable industrial word that’s merely been adopted as a bit of simile-slang, but the original term and meaning HASN’T gone away. Like “Flange”… which is a slang term for the vulva, but is still a part you will find on an automobile transmission. We could probably talk examples of the same all night.

        When we were being taught about the basics of blast furnaces and other forms of secondary industry in my early years of high school, we learnt all about what slag was and what to do with it. Particularly if you had to deal with some dirty slag – the most common kind. ;)

        Besides, a woman’s promiscuity is partially her own choice, rather than being a debilitating genetic condition.

  20. McMoose
    McMoose
    November 15, 2010 at 4:49 am | # | Reply

    Oh, jeez! REALLY??

  21. TexasNinjaBuzzard
    TexasNinjaBuzzard
    November 15, 2010 at 5:02 am | # | Reply

    This thing needs to have the necessary pegs and tabs to form a combiner-bot with Slag.

    • Kamino Neko
      Kamino Neko
      November 15, 2010 at 8:59 am | # | Reply

      Don’t forget Slapper!

  22. Mike Mihalopoulos
    Mike Mihalopoulos
    November 15, 2010 at 6:38 am | # | Reply

    It’s funny because it’s true.

  23. sean martin
    sean martin
    November 15, 2010 at 7:11 am | # | Reply

    Very good one, Willis. Very good indeed.

    And it was nice to see the boyfriend back. He’s been missed.

  24. Jabberwocky
    Jabberwocky
    November 15, 2010 at 8:26 am | # | Reply

    Nononononono, it should be called Gay Marriage :p

    A large portion of Americans believe in Darwin’s theory of evolution.

    • Rick Sivart
      Rick Sivart
      November 15, 2010 at 2:41 pm | # | Reply

      Me thinks the people that believe that cavemen rode dinosaurs are the same people that fear and thus are offended by gay marriage.

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        November 15, 2010 at 3:23 pm | # | Reply

        Young earth creationists are rare. People who want to oppress gays are a lot less rare. So while all of the former may be the latter, there are many of the latter that aren’t the former.

        • Rick Sivart
          Rick Sivart
          November 15, 2010 at 3:50 pm | # | Reply

          I’m just glad I live in Massachusetts where the former and the latter are both fairly rare (yet they are still the ones yelling about it) and where evolution and gay marriage can both flourish. Viva Le Fabulous!!!

  25. Kumata
    Kumata
    November 15, 2010 at 8:29 am | # | Reply

    ahahahahahahahahaha

    there’s seriously going to be transformer named ‘spastic’?

    ahahahahahahahahaha

  26. Slothful
    Slothful
    November 15, 2010 at 8:50 am | # | Reply

    :( , Willis, :(

  27. Liz
    Liz
    November 15, 2010 at 11:25 am | # | Reply

    Lol, I love when people over analyze the jokes.

    • Cassidy
      Cassidy
      November 15, 2010 at 1:21 pm | # | Reply

      where is Demoncat_4 when you need him LOL

      • gwalla
        gwalla
        November 15, 2010 at 4:47 pm | # | Reply

        Still fully contained on TNI. No signs of a breach yet.

        • Semysane
          Semysane
          November 15, 2010 at 11:09 pm | # | Reply

          in this comment gwalla pointed out that demoncat was still only on tni and hadnt started commnting on the shortpacked blog yet by comparing it to the naval term “breaching”

  28. MrGBH
    MrGBH
    November 15, 2010 at 12:03 pm | # | Reply

    I was going to say something along the lines of “Ooooh, Burned America!”
    But on closer inspection I notice that the Transformer in question is a Decepticon. Are you trilling to say that Darwinian Evolution is a tool of the Devil?

    (I know you’re not, but a lot of people would conclude that. Especially if the media noticed.)

  29. Rick Sivart
    Rick Sivart
    November 15, 2010 at 2:33 pm | # | Reply

    Let’s see… a name that would offend 90% of Americans and has a similar meaning to ‘spastic’… easy… Sarah Palin.

  30. Mugen
    Mugen
    November 15, 2010 at 2:48 pm | # | Reply

    Funny thing is that Transformers are Creationists themselves…

    • Rick Sivart
      Rick Sivart
      November 15, 2010 at 4:04 pm | # | Reply

      And yet they also show signs of evolution. In G1 cartoon continuity they evolved from simple worker robots into sentient beings. And in all continuities it is survival of the fittest in the Transformer universe and adaptability is key to survival.

      So Transformers truly is a blending of the 2 beliefs.

  31. Aesir
    Aesir
    November 15, 2010 at 3:23 pm | # | Reply

    On a Drew note actually, whenever he appears I get a bit of a Joyce vibe from him, is he maybe one of her brothers?

  32. Rasputin Varez
    Rasputin Varez
    November 15, 2010 at 3:24 pm | # | Reply

    Spastic means Physically retarded.

  33. Doom Shepherd
    Doom Shepherd
    November 15, 2010 at 3:32 pm | # | Reply

    It’s so hard being the only conservative atheist. I’m lonely.

    • Michael
      Michael
      November 15, 2010 at 4:48 pm | # | Reply

      Heh, what was the name of that atheist blogger who was super-misogynist, and eventually had to convert to Christianity in order to justify it? Anyways, that guy was a dick.

      • Doom Shepherd
        Doom Shepherd
        November 15, 2010 at 7:36 pm | # | Reply

        Meh, I wouldn’t know. I avoid blogs, as other people’s thoughts are usually of little interest to me. (Some people, like Willis, are the exceptions, because they can be both thoughtful AND funny.) I’d rather listen to a funny person I often disagree with than a dull person who shares my opinions.

        For myself, I could never me a misogynist. I could never discriminate like that.

        I’m a misanthrope.

  34. Sili
    Sili
    November 15, 2010 at 3:34 pm | # | Reply

    Now you’re just trolling for a Pharyngulation.

    (Good job!)

  35. Chad from Canada
    Chad from Canada
    November 15, 2010 at 3:35 pm | # | Reply

    As a Canadian, neither Spastic or Darwinian Evolution are at all offensive here. Nor is Gay Marriage, or the vast majority of other things mentioned in anything above… Save maybe the Notorious N word… There’s even a semi-socialist party…
    Gay Marriage is legal everywhere in the country. Evolution is taught in the 7th grade, comparative religions in the 8th. Unless, of course, you attend one of the religious schools, but they’re not publicly funded (except in Alberta I think) so that’s your own prerogative.
    But… We still have the loud and obnoxious minority… The group that hangs around in our main intersection with signs and hands out pamphlets… The JW’s… They’re annoying, but they don’t actually hold any power other than their one vote a piece.
    I think if there has to be a Canadian version of this bot… Possible names include: Bacon Hater, Stockwell Day (Anti-gay Politician), Quebec Separatist, Ben Mulroney (Our Ryan Seacrest… Hate that guy)… And a few others I can’t think of right now.

    • Rick Sivart
      Rick Sivart
      November 15, 2010 at 3:59 pm | # | Reply

      Would the term Hoser work in Canada as being offensive. I remember watching SCTV and the McKenzie brothers saying that.

      What about Canuck?

      That concludes all my knowledge of Canada. Yes, all from the McKenzie brothers and Wolverine.

      • Semysane
        Semysane
        November 15, 2010 at 11:14 pm | # | Reply

        Well, my local hockey team is the Vancouver Canucks, so if it IS offensive, it’s our word, and you can’t use it honky. And hoser… is kind of a non-word. I think I’ve only ever used the word hoser or the phrase “take-off, eh?” when doing a Mackenzie bros. impression, lol.

      • Just Random
        Just Random
        November 19, 2010 at 10:19 am | # | Reply

        “Canuck” = “Yankee” = “Limey” and not at all derogative. Hell, we used to have a super-hero named Captain Canuck! Also we had Johnny Canuck during WWII… Not remotely offensive.

        “Hoser” was a term the MacKenzie Bros made up to have some kind of an insult they could call each other that didn’t actually mean anything, so as to not offend anyone by using it. Never heard a Canadian say it in any way except ironically. “Oh, take off, you hoser, eh?”

        If we’re actually ticked off at someone we pretty much tend to use the same insults as Americans (asshole, jerk, dickwad, etc etc). Damn you and your ubiquitous culture! XD

        • quietdevious1
          quietdevious1
          December 16, 2011 at 12:17 am | # | Reply

          Way, way, way late… but I just learned this past year that “hoser” refers to the losing side of a hockey game that has to maintain the outdoor hockey rink on account of having lost.

    • gwalla
      gwalla
      November 15, 2010 at 4:45 pm | # | Reply

      CanadianBaconIsn’tRealBaconblast

    • Derik
      Derik
      November 16, 2010 at 12:13 am | # | Reply

      Oh fine, blame the JW’s. They’re an easy target.
      How original

    • Just Random
      Just Random
      November 19, 2010 at 10:14 am | # | Reply

      “Ben Mulroney”?! Brian Mulroney!!

      Hell, the guy actually even SUED THE COUNTRY a few years ago for hating him so much. XD What an ass.

    • Sir Rat
      Sir Rat
      February 9, 2011 at 10:30 pm | # | Reply

      Whoa, whoa, whoa.

      Back up, a couple of errors there my friend.
      (sorry if the following sounds like an insufferable smart-ass – not my intention. I’m merely trying to keep the record straight).

      We actually do have a Socialist Party, a Communist Party, a Marxist-Lenninist Party, and probably a Trotskyite Party too. I believe you are referring to the New Democratic Party, who are, as you suggested, socialist (not really an offensive word here).
      Catholic Schools are, in fact, publicly funded and we are bound by agreements made long ago (to appease French-Canadian Catholics) to continue to fund them.
      So yeah, the record has been set straight… you got the rest right by the way.

      PS: Sorry about the unnecessary nit-picking, I just pride myself on knowing all sorts of random nonsense about my country. But again, sorry. I promise not to do this again…much.

  36. Cattleprod
    Cattleprod
    November 15, 2010 at 4:11 pm | # | Reply

    Aren’t we all glad Hasbro stopped using ‘Slag’ as a character name so as not to offend British sensibilities?

    • MrGBH
      MrGBH
      November 17, 2010 at 4:03 pm | # | Reply

      Slag is also a technical term to do with smelting metal. I don’t think Spastic, although also a technical term, has much to do with machinery.

  37. ColdFusion
    ColdFusion
    November 15, 2010 at 7:23 pm | # | Reply

    When are people going to realize that -every- insult is named after a legitimate medical disorder.. there’s nothing wrong with the comparison.. @_@ you can’t.. ban comparisons.. otherwise it’s impossible to say anything negative..

    aaand once again I suppose I’m the only person around that objects to darwinian evolution on scientific grounds <_< yeah probably. I'll just shut up.

    • Semysane
      Semysane
      November 15, 2010 at 11:16 pm | # | Reply

      I don’t think wetback is a medical disorder. Some insults and slurs are just rude.

  38. kingleon
    kingleon
    November 15, 2010 at 10:51 pm | # | Reply

    This paleontologist who studies evolutionary processes approves.

    By the way, the Creation Museum is one scary freakin’ place. Quite interesting seeing (in a diorama no less!) how your science is the reason that SOCIETY IS BROKEN.

  39. Derik
    Derik
    November 15, 2010 at 11:51 pm | # | Reply

    Hey Walky! I find it annoying that all the old links on your livejournal don’t work.
    Kindly fix this. (By which I mean “kindly add this javascript to your master file.”)
    You could do this in .htaccess too, but I think comicpress mucks with it, so there’s a risk of wiping out the fix in the future if it’s done that way…

    var uri = window.location.toString(); //Convert the current URI to a string

    //Test it see if the URL matches “shortpacked.com/d/########.html”
    if (matches = uri.match(/(www\.)?shortpacked.com\/d\/([0-9]{4})([0-9]{2})([0-9]{2}).html/i)) {
    //Change page to “shortpacked.com/d/####/##/##/” (archive page for that date)
    window.location = ‘http://www.shortpacked.com/’ + matches[2] + ‘/’ + matches[3] + ‘/’ + matches[4] + ‘/’;;
    }

    • Derik
      Derik
      November 15, 2010 at 11:53 pm | # | Reply

      …also kindly fix the double-semicolon on that last line. (It’s semantically null, but distasteful.)

    • David Willis
      David Willis
      November 16, 2010 at 12:09 am | # | Reply

      I don’t know what a master file is! I know what a style sheet is, but I don’t think that’s what you want.

      • Derik
        Derik
        November 16, 2010 at 12:22 am | # | Reply

        Pfft, your master Javascript file is… is…
        …you don’t have one. You have a dozen lesser includes, but no master script file. *sigh*

        …just add it between <script> tags like your google analytics code. *grumble*

        • Derik
          Derik
          November 16, 2010 at 12:28 am | # | Reply

          Also– your comment script has converted my dumb quotes to smart ones!
          …really, you might want to just test the code first.
          (Here’s a Greasemonkey version.)
          http://rapidshare.com/files/431138739/fixoldshortpackedlinks.user.js

        • David Willis
          David Willis
          November 16, 2010 at 12:44 am | # | Reply

          Google Analytics code is added using a plugin feature. I don’t touch this site’s HTML.

          • David Willis
            David Willis
            November 16, 2010 at 12:56 am | # | Reply

            Because I am smart, I found a plugin that adds such code to the header. Your script now works.

  40. Astragali
    Astragali
    November 16, 2010 at 5:10 am | # | Reply

    The history of “spastic” being an insult in the UK is riddled with irony, if Wikipedia is anything to go by. According to the article there, the term became a general insult amongst children after the airing of an episode of Blue Peter (a popular children’s magazine programme), which was trying to put a positive light on the condition.

    The insult came to be regarded as being so offensive that The Spastics Society changed its name to Scope in 1994 – and the ever-inventive British public changed the insults to (amongst others) “Scope”, “Scoper”, “Scope Head”, and “Scopie”.

  41. Rezzy
    Rezzy
    November 16, 2010 at 9:36 am | # | Reply

    http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lbyb4tLQUU1qzr3bdo1_500.jpg I feel that this picture might be relevant?

  42. Tomas
    Tomas
    November 24, 2010 at 12:09 pm | # | Reply

    The British already put Darwin on their cash.

  43. Will the MiniGeek
    Will the MiniGeek
    January 3, 2011 at 9:09 am | # | Reply

    Spastic is used in the same way a retard.Though many people don’t no it, it actually refers to someone with Cerebral palsy.

  44. quietdevious1
    quietdevious1
    May 12, 2011 at 1:04 am | # | Reply

    I had a ferret named Spaz once. He was so named because he played all crazy-like, and all you’d see was a white blur darting around the room. The other ferret was named Tempest, because he would throw tantrums.

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