Last we saw Conni, she had grown some figurative balls.
You can watch me draw this strip on uStream.
Shortpacked! by David Willis
Toys are serious business.
Convention appearances:
Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Multiplex
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
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Dinosaur Comics
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Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
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Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
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©2005-2013 David Willis | Powered by WordPress with ComicPress | Subscribe: RSS | Back to Top ↑
Huh, haven’t seen Conquest in years. Does this mean Ronnie’s coming back soon as well?
Nope!
Well, that sounded final…
No it doesn’t. Ronnie might come back just fine. Willis’ comment merely stated that such an event, should it happen, would have no connection with Connie’s reappearance today.
I miss Ronnie… (Hey, first time I’ve said that when it wasn’t random!)
Yeah. Or, he could be lying. Much easier to believe
Your Gravatar works with damn near anything, and I applaud it for being able to pull that off.
So I see you’re back to using the custom avatar again. I find it interesting that for a while you used a figurine of your (in-universe) mortal enemy, especially when he’s usually a stand-in for your personality while Willis (in-universe) is a stand-in for your socio-political self. WOnder what that says about you.
This is the only avatar I have ever used on the Comicpress version of this site.
Perhaps you are getting confused with my Twitter avatar.
In the first few pages of comments for the strip your avatar is toy-Ethan. At least it claims to be you.
and in the first few pages of comments I mean from the april 2010 pages right after the comments were introduced.
And thus my comment of two days ago! KEANU WHOA
I think it was established a while ago, Ronnie left the world of the living lol….. I think….
Nah, he just kind of vanished.
He left the world of the living a long time ago. He simply remained behind as a remnant, a spectre, with unfinished business. Once his business was completed, he continued onward to a higher stage, and was forgotten.
Or he just had to go to the bathroom…
It’s really weird re-reading this, I haven’t seen him in about 3 hours.
What convenient timing!
Almost as if it was all planned out months ahead by some omniscient being from outside their world.
Hooray! The return of Conquest!
Wait…I thought she refused to keep sleeping with people to produce a heir for Galasso. Why is she so okay with sleeping with Jacob?
actual physical attraction on her own terms masquerading under her old personality?
I guess, but after making such a big deal of not fucking random guys anymore deciding to fuck a guy she met mere seconds ago would be a bit…odd, I guess is the word.
Well, she’s back in store for something.
It’s easy to fall back into old habits.
technically she said she no longer wanted to screw 30 guys a day that still leaves plenty opportunities for a quickie in the backroom
Note how enthusiastic she isn’t.
Perhaps her proposition for her father is “I’ll go back to trying to make you an heir, if you pay my bills. Living on my own with
no marketable skillsonly one marketable skill, is HARD!”You forgot her first statement where she says shes there to see her father for a business proposition, which thats usually the only business her Father has with her.
Between a closet full of hot librarians, a porn star, and, well, Connie, poor Jacob just can’t catch a break.
LMAO! Oh, this is so wrong…there has to be more. Roz/Conni catfight? Or is there enough Jacob for everybody?
Or they might end up sleeping with each other instead. Probably the best solution all around.
If I’ve been understanding the situation correctly, there isn’t enough Jacob for anybody.
This is a really good one.
HEY IT’S YOU
Hi you =D
(9 months too late)
Jacob seems to be rapidly falling into ‘cursed with awesome’ territory…
Not from his perspective. For anyone else it would be awesome, but if his issues are actual sex addiction rather than just being horny, it is a bad thing.
that would be the ‘cursed’ part
Except that ‘Cursed With Awesome’ is a supposed curse that turns out better for the ‘cursed’ than not being cursed would.
This is more Blessed With Suck – he’s blessed with raw animal magnetism…but it turns out to be a major problem for him, because of his addiction.
This feels like the prologue to an epic Conquest vs. Roz battle. Jacob can only pray that a deux ex machina save him, because otherwise HE IS DOOMED!
He needs some kind of…like…last minute, poorly-set-up dues ex machina!!
Stop! Vegan Police!
Isn’t a “parmesan” like a rodent or something?
HAH oh man this one is awesome! After such a long, unexplained sabattical om Connie, THIS is the absolute perfect timing for a dramatic return.
And tbf reminds me that despite all the sympathy being thrown at Jacob for being tried so much as a recovering addict, I really ough to be angrily jealous at his ass for gettig so many more sexy opportunities than any one man should be allowed.
Forgot to mention how much I also love the “s’arrête!” sound. Skidding to a halt actually sounds kinda like that, doesn’t it? There should be more onomatopoiea in French.
Also forgive my awful typos. New computer. New keyboard.
there are plenty of other onomatopeia in french:
Plic! Ploc! Ouaf! Miaou! Meuh! Pan! Pouf! Poum! Pim! Pam! Clac! Aïe! Ouille! Euh! Tac! Tic! Toc! Clic! Pfff! Chut! Ouf! Ah ! Eh ! Oh ! Ha ! Hé ! Hi ! hi ! Hue ! Aïe ! Ouille ! Atchoum ! Berk ! Blablabla ! Bof ! Brrr ! Glouglou ! Han ! Hem ! Hum ! Hop ! Hou ! Miam-miam ! Ouste ! Peuh ! Pouah ! Pouih ! Patati Patata ! Pschitt ! Psst! Scrogneugneu ! Sniff ! Zou ! Schbloing! cocorico, coin-coin, coucou, cui-cui, hi-han, wouh-wouh, Badaboum! Boum ! Clac ! Crac ! Patatras ! Plouf ! Paf ! Vlan !Couac ! Pin-pon ! Tut-tut ! vroum! piou-piou!balouza, kwika, woga chtonga, azlok, gouzi, han, hin hin, arf, bêêê, bzzz, chtac, drelin, crii, oups, ouin, glop, gruik, hop, ron, ratatata
I’ve read Astèrix too
Well your keyboard hasn’t then, it’s an “é” an not an “è”. Plus most of these come from Franquin (a bit later), and those from Astérix did eventually come from older comics like Bécassine, Les Pieds-nickelés, Quick et Flupke…
The return of Conquest is AWESOME. I hope she’s here for more than just to taunt Jacob for a few strips before vanishing again.
OH THE WACKY HIJINKS. One of the funniest strips in awhile, I have to say (not that the others weren’t funny, but this is hilarious). “S^arrete” is a bit highbrow, though, as measured by the fact that I had to google it.
You mean you don’t remember it from Pepe LePew Looney Tunes?
Well… I guess that strong independent woman thing that Connie was/is going for, only goes so far…
Poor Jacob – only Joe can save him now-!
That was beautiful. Especially Jacob’s last word balloon.
Yep, that about sums it up. The look on his face, combined with the word balloon, is PRICELESS.
Best. Word Balloon. EVER!
DEUS SEX MACHINA.
(I want a nickel every time someone uses that phrase)
You’ll have to call your mom, then- she has all the nickels now.
The return of Conquest! Because this strip didn’t have enough chicks, obviously -_-
This comic? Too many chicks?
Hahahahaha go look at QC
I was actually semi-quoting something Jeph said the strip he introduced…either Penelope or Marigold. Can’t remember right now.
There are more women in the strip? Horrors! The more women there are, the more likely it becomes that they’ll talk about things other than men! No webcomic should ever pass the Bechdel Test! It’s just not natural!
Enter the worst possible thing that could happen.
Glad she is back, even though it may be for a short while. Was hoping Nathan would inadvertently still give Glasso an heir…that would be awesome. Not sure how he would explain it to his man, but still…the hijinx that would ensue…
Oh my god. This strip was uber-uber funny.
Thank you.
What happened to Glasso anyway? I forget.
I could go back and review I suppose.
Alright! I’ve been hoping for Conni to re-enter the strip even before Jacob was introduced. Hopefully she’ll stick around.
Hey… Connie isn’t wearing a belly shirt…
So Robin’s identical twin is “super hot”. Good to know.
I think Jacob’s resolve is breaking down. It’s like a gambling addict trapped in las vegas, everywhere he turns there is a new temptation. Poor Jacob.
‘So Robin’s identical twin is “super hot”. Good to know.’
I’m not sure how you turned “younger sister” into “identical twin”.
Not sure if I like the cheek blush thingies on Conquest. Her skin is just a bit too pale for them.
Admittedly, I don’t care for them on any of the characters, but they seem to stand out more on Connie. Here’s hoping that they go away, like how Mike doesn’t have them either.
Agreed. Conquest was hotter without the blush and it looks totally out of place on a large number of the characters.
Well Jacob. it’s time for you to just give in to your primative instints and jsut band the holy hell out of all the women here already. I’m sure mike will take it and sell it.
No Jacob, be strong man, be strong! Use your willpower! use Hal’s oath if it helps! Do not give in!
CONNICONNICONNICONNI
I KNEW she’d be coming back the instant we learned that Jacob had a sex addiction. It’s just too good a match to pass up.
Although, I figured she might have changed somewhat since we last saw her… since she had started standing up to her father, I guessed she’d be done with the “sex with random strangers” thing.
Huzzah! Connie is back!
Gallaso did not hire back his own daughter? Does he even remember that he has a daughter?
Hasn’t she been undercover at McAwesome’s?
Yay! Connie’s back!
This comic was severely lacking in hot blondes.
-airfox
That poor BASTARD.
Mildly off topic, but as I’m reading this, I’m hearing Donald Faison for Jacob’s “voice”
You know, it occurs to me that if Jacob could manage to explain himself before Connie loses her clothes, she might be one of the characters more likely to be sympathetic about it. I mean, its not the same situation, but she certainly has experience in the more-sex-than-is-healthy-or-particularly-pleasant department, and the last time we saw her she was trying to get out of that pattern of activity…
I didn’t know Conni bothered to WEAR a bra.
I don’t care about Conquest. Not anyone else who humped a horse on instructions from a parent.
C’mon, give her a break. She was only 12. She didn’t know any better.
And now I’ve just ran out of brain bleach.
Don’t worry I hear WalMart is having a sale.
This is even more horrifying because it means that either Conquest was 12 when she slept with Ethan, as she says the centaur incident happened a week before that, or it has happened MORE THAN ONCE. Way to induce fridge horror through a comment, you monster.
Wh..what? How old is she?
Working at shortpacked! must be the best job ever!!
Connie! I was wondering when she’d show up again.
Oh god, the torture continues. Poor, poor Jacob.
I thought Conni had had enough of being a slutbunny for her daddy?
Okay, that sounded creepy. And sexy.
Another comic formatted with a full-body introduction to a character that’s two panels high. Nice structural consistency, Willis!
So far this storyline, of characters introduced this way, we have: Stacy, Roz, Conquest.