Shortpacked! by David Willis
Toys are serious business.
Convention appearances:
Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Multiplex
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
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©2005-2013 David Willis | Powered by WordPress with ComicPress | Subscribe: RSS | Back to Top ↑
HAHA WITH THE EPIC HATEFUCKS!
*so beautiful*
I cried a little.
XD
I laughed, I cried, I learned, I loved.
I’m not ready to move on yet though…
Dude’s got balls to say that when the woman’s right there.
I’m willing to bet that Amber’s mom, now seeing what Mike is like sober, will express concern for Amber’s well-being and conflict will arise.
Given the fact that she stayed at their place right after Donna was born, I’m sure she’s seen the real non-drunk Mike ad i either okay with it or has had that talk with Amber off-screen.
Give it up, Mike, you’ve lost control of the moment.
He’s lost control of his anger. He’s sober… and almost happy. It’s clearly very distressing for him.
“For a nickel!”
I know it’s like he’s trying too hard. Maybe he’s said it so many times it’s lost all meaning.
I love how hard he’s trying. It’s soo adorable. He’s just like spitting out gross and awful things and everyone is ignoring him. Poor dude.
Note he gets more nasty when as good things happen. This is how he shows his love!
I think Mike is trying to justify his emotions here. That his “happy” “feelings” that he usually “feels” are manifesting through the attempted insults threw his perspectivly “cheap?/awesome” wedding at the expense of his mother in law.
In addition to that he now has to explain what he means about the whole mom nickle deal
He’s just trying to provide context for the kids. It’s educational!
I’m more thinking “Stop explaining the joke! We all get it already…”
Best. Wedding. Ever.
If it’s on a space carrier with giant robots, it will be the best wedding ever.
Nah, I believe Robotech did that already & it was fairly boring from my recollection.
Now having a wedding during skydiving would be cool, if only things worked like Point Break. But they don’t, so neither party could hear each other during the dive. It’s true, I saw it on Mythbusters.
Technically they did it twice if you include The Sentinels movie as well as the episode where Max and Miriya get married. I always felt bad about the Sentinels movie though. Hey Minmei that dude you’ve been chasing for years is getting married to his CO, oh yeah and since there are no other music acts in the world you’ve been hired to play at the reception.
Eh, let her rot. I always disliked her anyway. But I really hated Lynn Kaifun, that jackhole can go jump off a bridge for all I care. Reflecting back, I guess I know one of the reasons why I hate Lacus Clyne. Popstars should step away from politics.
Minmei wishes she was half as level-headed and politically savvy as Lacus Clyne.
true facts. Lacus stole a friggin battleship
Does “The Sentinels” ever count?
I think the movie is still considered canon for the sake of the Shadow Chronicles movie. Now the comics I don’t think count for anyone except this one guy I knew in Colorado that thought the stone warriors were the awesomest thing evar.
Sentinels counts continuitywise because most Robotech chronology goes off the novels, & novels 13-18 (19 is the wrapup novel) are set in the Sentinels end of the Universe. Shadow Chronicles can be wormed into that mix as a precursor to the actual hunt for the SDF-3.
only thing that really bugged me about the Sentinels arc is the fact that they took out the Transformable aspect of the SDF series… granted it was not part of the original design, but it was just so much fun that it seems like a waste.
By “the movie”, are you talking about a The Sentinels movie (I thought there was only an episode or so of an incomplete series), or the “Robotech: The Movie” that was Megazone 23 with some random Southern Cross battle scenes spliced in?
I’ve only ever seen Sentinels as one like hour tenish short movie thing. While I am vaguely aware it was made from the footage that had been produced for the kaiboshed new series I always think of it as a movie since I never saw it in individual episodes.
That Megazone 23 thing doesn’t exist as far as I’m concerned.
It really could end no other way. Let there be memes.
Now you’re just trying too hardf Mike.
Oh bite him, it’s fun.
Amber will bite him during one of the most epic of hate-fucks
So epic in fact that it cause earthquakes and typhoons. (Apologies to victims of natural disasters everywhere.)
Why? Clearly it’s Amber and Mike who need to apologize.
I wonder if he blurts out his favorite words during sexy times. “MOMS! … NICKELS!… MOMS! … NICKELS!… EYEBROWS! …. NICKEEEELS!”
…what about… eyebrows?
*seaweed*
That remark about eyebrows and seaweed reminds me of City Hunter somehow.
Eyebrows….now I wanna see a Shortpacked/Fancy Adventures crossover. Dear god…..
Fooly?
Cooly?
And thank you, won’t you?
This is the happiest moment of Donna’s life. It’s all downhill from here.
What’s the worse that could happen? Her parents getting shot right in front of her when she was 8 or something?
Mike’s survived worse.
“You call this tentacle violation? You’re mom’s better than you at this. That’s because she’s a prosta
“You call that breaking my spine? You RED team ladies wouldn’t know how to break a spine if-”
Nice one, but my quote? Mike’s actual last words. (Roughly.)
http://www.itswalky.com/d/20041002.html
GDI, I just ended up rereading the ending to It’s Walky.
Right there with ya buddy.
Indeed, this was a Pyrrhic victory.
I love those final strips of It’s Walky.
Oh my God, where did the last three hours go?
She’s a baby. She’s probably happy whenever she gets milk. Babies are cool.
I like to imagine that the confetti appeared Ace Attorny style
Just off screen: Dick Gumshoe throwing confetti.
I like to imagine that Galasso’s got a trap door in the ceiling usually full of snakes that Robin convinced him to empty out for the occasion.
I like to imagine that they were too broke to buy confetti and are throwing big ice cream sprinkles.
Those’re some bigass sprinkles.
Which means there’s some bigass ice cream scoops out there somewhere! Or a bigass soft serve machine!
Seen that first and the second.
First was awesome.
Second was lame, due to it’s size being very inefficient.
Death never did them apart. He was dead before they met and hasn’t died since.
(/semantics)
Mike is trying so hard to be Mike.
Almost as hard as he fucked your mom.
(For a nickel.)
Let the hatefucks begin!
Thank you for saying “I do” Mike. Was glad this wedding didn’t go south.
Well, he said it in his own way but yeah glad there wasn’t any Legion of Evil going to crash the wedding or anything.
The Walkyverse has already kinda been there.
He didn’t have enough time to plan ahead. He left his tape recorder with “I do” orgasmed out by Ambers mom at home.
But the Legion of Something could always show up.
I would truely pity them if they ruined this. The ass kicking they would recvieve would eb a beautiful thing to behold.
It’s–what? Four normal folks? Breaking up a wedding where the groom and like 80% of his half of the wedding party are superpowered? Yeah. Awesome asskicking.
I don’t know…we still have a friday comic to read
and lets not forget Willis loves giving us Cliffhangers
…so things could “still” go south.
Looks like Friday will be fairly mellow, if this one panel is anything to go on…
http://itswalky.tumblr.com/post/31288336945/a-sneak-at-fridays-shortpacked
Receptions.
Best part about going to a wedding.
Believe me, I’ve been to many
Receptions.
Best part about going to a wedding.
Believe me, I’ve been to many
Sorry for repost. bad internet is bad.
OHHHH Mike gives your mom a nickel? I thought it was your mom pays Mike a nickel to have sex with him.
Yeah…took me a while to figure out which it was, honestly.
It feels good to not be alone.
Really, it depends on if Mike is feeling generous or not.
And perfect wedding. Robin is Robin and Mike is Mike, and Amber is beautiful and ignoring his ‘mom comments’, and the air is full of confetti.
You have to take Mike with a pound of salt.
And just a sprinkle of oregano.
And also a teaspoon of Cardamon(sp?)
and a pinch of nutmeg can really enhance the flavor…
wait, what were we talking about?
Awww seems so inappropriate and yet so right. Awww.
And then Mike removed his mask and said, “Amber, I fucked your mom.” And lo it was revealed that Mike was Amber’s dad and he had, indeed, fucked her mom and lo it was also revealed that he did so to her for a nickel and that she was, indeed, a woman of the night.
That’s got really disturbing implications for Donna’s genetic well-being. Among other things.
Wait, did Robin just call Donna a bastard spawn?
Harsh but accurate.
No it’s not…since her father never left her and just got married. If anything, she’s an anti-bastard.
A bastard is just someone born out of wedlock. Doesn’t matter if the dad sticks around.
:C darn…
I’m a bastard…
Meh. Not like anyone really cares in the 21st century.
That may or may not be true. Under English common law, it didn’t matter, but under the law of Rome (and therefore most of Europe in medieval and early modern times), a bastard whose parents married was no longer considered a bastard, although they couldn’t claim military parentage if their father had been a slave at the time of their birth.
So…many…memes…
“Oh my gods. It’s full of memes!”
Memes….my God.
Including, if you notice, a reference to Mike’s final words in the last panel.
So…little….time…..
It’s Memeageden!
I’m pretty sure Amber’s mom didn’t charge Jacob when they were bangin’
She did, with her tongue.
I’m loving every moment of this. No matter how hard Mike tries to ruin the moment, and how ridiculous Robin’s speech is, it’s all STILL incredibly heartwarming and awesome.
It’s awesome in the Walkyverse way.
Happy Donna is happy.
I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop. Something like, oh, I don’t know, Faz inserting his name in the marriage license or something.
I think I’m going to cry.
A good title for this strip would be “cluster fuck”
I like how Mike’s just really not putting too much effort into being antagonistic here. It’s just some very token sniping from him.
You everything is going off the rails when you have to explain the joke.
If I intended on ever getting married, and lived in the fictional universe of Shortpacked!, I would totes have Robin officiate my wedding.
Assuming of course you knew her.
Why does everyone talk about living in a fictional universe assume they’d be a protagonist?
Oh come on, Robin would totally turn up to perform a wedding for perfect strangers if they asked. Especially if they promised she could stay for cake.
I assume I’d know of her (because she’s a war hero and former congresswoman) and I assume I’d still be me. Also, I’d pay her for her services in Skittles.
And let’s be honest, if Shortpacked! (the store) existed, most of us would probably have found a way to shop there (and complain about Transformers/Batman/Ponies/sci-fi/toys-in-general).
Oh, man. Forget seasonal help, a donation reward should be to get a comic written in which we lose an argument with a Shortpacked! character of our choosing.
Or, for a truly epic donation, we actually win and get to be smug about it forever…….
or for five cents Willis posts a NSFW picture of Mike and our moms on his tumblr!
You, sir, just won the internet!
Aww, Mike always knows just the right things to say! My heart melted when I read that last panel.
Whow, the only wedding I could think to be more disturbed to be at is that one on Girly, and they did a hale mary pass on that one.
What an awesome wedding.
Mike always has his eye on the prize, specifically on nickels
It’s nice to see Mike happy, seriously
Oh Mike. Now you’re just trying too hard.
Hooray!
Mike’s trying so hard to reassure everyone that he is still, in fact, a jerk. So insecure in his assholeness.
Sniff, I always cry at weddings.
And laugh at funerals?
Yes Janet, Mike’s a lucky guy!(or are we not quoting RHPS?)
Lucky hell, Betty’s got the clap!
Comments section drinking game: every time someone mentions Mike overcompensating in dickishness, take a shot.
…thats a death sentence.
Hell, if you’re anything like Mike, by the time you’re halfway done you’ll have donated your life savings to charity and given your house to homeless people.
Hopefully if/when I get married, there will be less cussing.
Aw. At least have the vows include the phrase “licky-style the bride”
YAY.
Mike is tasteless as always. Yeah Mike, I do your…dad for a…penny! (I was going to make a joke that, if it’s flipped, Amber can claim she “does” Mike’s Mom or Dad for a nickel, but that might be too mean-spirited.)
Mike wrote his own vows, apparently.
The meme returns!
Last panel’s lines could not have been more memetastic had they been fanmade.
I was totally expecting “this isn’t blackmail, it’s love” to slip in somewhere.
Mike’s having trouble maintaining the angry-eyes.
This makes me hopeful for marriages everywhere
This is seriously such a great story line! Mike looks content and this is the happiest we’ve seen Donna ever!
You know you’ve got good characters when that is somehow beautiful.
Uh oh … the universes are bleeding into each other! The multiverse is losing stability. That or it’s just a strange moment of synchronicity.
Dumbiverse Mike: In a church … saying he’s there because he gave Joyce’s mom a nickel.
Walkyverse Mike: In a toy shop acting as an ersatz church … working the fact he gave Amber’s mom a nickel into his vow of acceptance.
And we can’t be 100% sure the two buildings aren’t in the same spot in the different continuities … subtle knife style…
Hopefully the timelines will diverge again soon and the danger will be over.
That can’t be good when two universes started to bleed in to each other. It’ll create a catastrophe so huge that the two universes could be wiped out. This also the reason why you should never screw your alternate universe counterpart.
When worlds collide, heavens tremble. When heroes collide, heavens crack. When universes collide, heavens become a hell…called Deathmate.
I’ll go with synchronicity. We have at least another 16 years in this universe before stuff potentially goes all to hell… well, maybe sooner but I somehow doubt Willis would do that at this point without it being fairly obvious in advance.
Dumbing of Age takes place at Indiana University.
Shortpacked! takes place in LA.
So unless Joyce, Ethan, Mike and Sierra went way out of their way to go to church, no, the two buildings are not located anywhere near each other. Even assuming the Earth rotating and revolving at different rates in the universes to allow the overlap, the latitudinal lines don’t line up. Sorry!
However, this would be a cool way to make the Crisis poster fit into Willis’s whole “EVERYTHING MUST BE CANON” thing.
LA? You mean SF.
Yeah if it was LA there’d be more Vampires with Souls Running around.
And how lame would that be?
But you’re right, my mistake. Nevertheless the theory doesn’t work.
Is it just me, or are the nickle jokes getting old?
Really old?
It feels more like Mike has a mental disorder or early dementia rather then just being a prick.
(Shrug.)
No, see, he’s desperately trying to hold onto his dickishness in the face of this incredibly happy time. And failing.
Are those Mike eyebrows I see on Donna?
Yeah.
Look at that last panel!
She’s such a happy, ugly baby!
I would punch my spouse out cold if they called my mother a prostitute, whether it was on our wedding our not.
But Mike is a comedy character in a world that is comedy/drama.
The juxtaposition of the different tones/themes is strangely amusing.
See, if I’d just married someone, and he insisted that my mother was a prostitute, I’d turn to him, shocked, and say, “But who’d pay to sleep with THAT?!”
Then again, my mother wouldn’t be at my wedding, largely due to her being hateful and homophobic and having done the traditional “I HAVE NO SON” so… yeah, parallel kinda shattered. Still.
And then the awkward moment at the reception when Danny strikes up a conversation with Historical Jesus.
Danny? What about how Joyce is gonna react?
What I was wondering:
Who are their maiden of honor and best man?
My bet:
Jason and Leslie
Given the cast positions on September 10th, I’m going to say Leslie and Ethan (Though Ethan changed positions during subsequent strips, so it’s hard to say).
He did? Where?
September 12th – where he was suddenly in Amber’s Field of Vision.
And here comes the Friday twist…
Very nicely done, you are the master Willis. loved the “illegitimate bastard spawn” line.
So that’s what that joke meant…
Since my wedding was this saturday, I would like to thanks Willy for inspiring the biggest of hatefucks
Congratz on marrying!!
Oh Robyn, this is why we love you! Also Malaya was added to make her seem more likable. DON’T DENY IT- its the only reason for her needing to be in this comic.