Shortpacked! by David Willis
Toys are serious business.
Convention appearances:
Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Multiplex
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
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©2005-2013 David Willis | Powered by WordPress with ComicPress | Subscribe: RSS | Back to Top ↑
Damnit Dan Hibiki!
This decision would probably be easier if Ken knew about the horse thing.
“She’s pretty AND she likes animals! Man, this decision is really tough.”
Ken you have to give up your man card
Ken is a Nice Guy, so he never had one of those to begin with
Man cards are a fiction invented by the Patriarchy and the jackasses in the media. No, Ken needs to give up his unhealthy obsession with someone who’s just not interested. There, fixed it for you.
Check last year worth of http://www.sinfest.com comics for takes on the patriarchy too. Webcomics: fun and educational!
The patriarchy story arc started off clever and insightful, but then it just kept going, non-stop, for the next year.
After a few months of strips, I realized that this was basically a religious conversion for the author, and he’s never going to stop talking about how awesome his new religion is. He has a message, and he must preach it!
He’s like the anti-Dave Sim of webcomics now.
Since I didn’t know who he was, I just looked up Dave Sim. Now I have to say:
Being the anti-Dave Sim is -so- not a bad thing.
Hey, even if a comic’s message is one I would agree with, if the comic itself is bad, it’s bad. And Sinfest is awful.
The thing about being an anti-Dave Sim is that, while you carry the opposite charge, you’re still the same class of particle.
That’s about the most insightful thing I’ve heard all week. Admitedly, it’s only Monday, but hey, you’re off to a good start!
Oh thank god I’m not the only one. It’s not even that I disagree with it, or whatever. He’s just running it into the ground!
Godamnit, I just want some hookers or something. Because that would actually change the pace!
(though, actually, I’m just in it to watch Fuchia and Crimmy. And the Jay-Z girl is funny, too).
You’re definitely not the only one. Sinfest has just about annoyed me into supporting opression.
(Of course, I still read it anyway. I wish he’d go back to being less single-issue.)
It appears the site is now dead anyway … shame … I haven’t caught up with Sinfest in quite some time.
Mind you, there always was a religious undercurrent to the thing, hence the name…
Sinfest still updates nearly every day! Tatsuya doesn’t update *his* status, though.
I think its just that the link has the wrong suffix (it should be .net)
Very true, my bad. (ps: I still like sinfest a lot – not as much as I did before, yeah, but that goes for every single webcomic around, including this one, so I thought I was the problem).
That link is one of the most beautiful things I have ever read. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go drink a Guinness, have hot, sweaty sex with my wife, and then watch My Little Pony with my daughters in the morning.
I have heard the phrase “man card”… maybe three times ever? Maybe that phrase isn’t used as much where I live in Canada…
Well written article though.
But they used Man cards on Scrubs. And it was wonderful.
That whole ‘Man Card’ thing always struck me as extremely sexist. Could just be me, though.
Women can have Man Cards too!
Are you sure that they’re not Donar Cards?
Not just you, it’s quite sexist!
(see linked item)
That was revoked two strips ago.
I really hope we get insight into why Ken actually likes Malaya. I don’t think we’ve ever seen her treat him as an actual friend.
Well it took a while to get Amber and Mike to make sense.
I actually have a habbit of not always falling for nice girls. =/
I have a habit of nearly always falling for not nice girls. Just I don’t realise they’re not nice until afterwards
I was about to reply to Wonder Wig. Then realised I had last time I was here.
They go to movies together, she confides in him, she talks about hot women with him. While she thinks he needs to “grow a spine” and stop crushing on her, she has a general interest in his welfare and he’s one of the few people she won’t really insult. When she wanted to ditch the job before meeting Les, it was the prospect of hurting his feelings that persuaded her not to. She is ABSOLUTELY Ken’s friend– and a much better friend to him than Ken is to her, because she doesn’t have an ulterior motive. (Being friends with him DOES make it easier to keep her apartment, but if she cared about that she’d be nice to Arnold.)
I think it’s a mistake to say the Malaya is a better friend to Ken then vice versa, until we see Ken’s reaction to Malaya categorically stating she’s not interested in him. If he turns into a douch cucumber over it, then you’re right. If he continues treating her like a friend and being decent to her anyway, you’re wrong.
TLDR: Falling for someone doesn’t automatically make you a bad friend to them.
There’s no ulterior motive in Ken. He never claimed to want to be Malaya’s friend. He wants her to love him like he loves her. Problem is he won’t take no for an answer.
Doubt it. We never really got proper resolve over Drew’s backstory, so I’m not expecting an explanation from Ken about crushing on Malaya either.
I just kinda assumed Drew was something like their world’s Catman and that was all we’d ever need to know ’bout him…
I’ve got a friend who comes to me with shit like this constantly. He gets laid and comes up with reasons why it’s a bad thing and I should pity him.
Arnold’s reactions match my own, naturally.
I knew a dude like that in college. He was incredibly popular with the ladies, but of course the one girl he really wanted already had a boyfriend. So he went through like seven different girls while waiting for this one to break up, and always whined to me that she totally deserved someone who’d appreciate her more. Like the guy who was banging his way through half the campus directory out of frustration, apparently.
Well…I guess there’s experience on his side.
Just like Love in the time of Cholera!
Ken, here’s a clue. Would you like to take this yourself, or should I administer it to you with the clue bat?
Nah, don’t bother. He’ll probably make his saving throw.
Sadly, clues are only truly effective when self-administered.
He might benefit more from a Bat Clue than a clue bat.
Arnold. I request more Arnold.
And you’re not the only one.
AND YOU HAVE MY BO
AND MY NUNCHUCKS!
AND MY AXE!
There, just for you.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0115200/
AND MY PENIS, FOR A NICKEL!
AND MY WIG!
AND MY SONIC SCREWDRIVER
AND MY CYBER-SLASH TAIL WEAPON
AND MY FLUFFY BUNNY!
AND M-m-m-MY SHARONA!
AND MY-TOSIS!
Actually, I use deodorant.
I like him. He could be as potentially bad as some of the regular losers we see shopping at Shortpacked, but since we don’t see him there giving anyone a hard time he must be cool.
Can’t you see he’s much to busy playing insert game here?
insert game here requires a lot of attention and focus.
Even without my remembering his name, I imagine his dialogue in Pat Morita’s voice. (No, not Keye Luke’s.)
I, personally, am waiting for Rebecca Ground to show up and put the soda cans on the counter into a recycling box then disappear without saying a word…
<__>…
- a_o_t_8.
I kind of want to stab Ken in the brain with a spoon.
I want to spoon Ken in a brain
SPORK!
Ken would rater spoon with Malaya.
Why a spoon, Bekah? Why not a fork?
Forks are pointy. It would hurt less.
You also need a microscope to find said brain first.
Damnit Ryu! You know what are the odds of actually getting to do it with a very, very hot woman on the first try is in one lifetime? 0.0000000000000000000001% and that’s counting the odds that she’s not spoken for and doesn’t have a very, very jealous ex or practicing black magic and a bunch of other variables that I possibly made up.
Actually, in this location, the odds are pretty damn high. The fact that he hasn’t gotten laid by now is just poor timing and Galasso’s increasing douchocity driving Conquest away.
And that Ken just prefer to chase Malaya like Pepe Le Pew chasing a cat with white paint on.
I hate you so much right now Kazuya.
Love your Grav Mikey
Don’t you hate it when hot chicks wanna nail you but mean chicks don’t?
I don’t mean to sound “stupid”, but why is it such a big deal to people that Ken doesn’t just wanna jump into bed with Conquest? I mean, yes she is an “attractive” women and so forth and completely willing, but Ken would obviously feel bad about it anyway.
But hey – he’s a man and they should want to have sex with every pretty girl… Maybe she’s just not his type… or maybe he hates one night stands?
For example – Conquest isn’t really my type of girl. I probably wouldn’t want to sleep with her – is that really so shocking?
Also he wants to sleep with her because he wants to make another girl jealous which is sleazy regardless of Conquest’s approval (okay, outright suggestion) and Ken’s a fairly nice guy… with really poor tastes…
That being said – why would Malaya be his freakin’ type? Did she (unintentional) save his life at some point and she doesn’t remember and he‘s suffering from a case of subconscious hero worship? Unlike some I don’t hate Malaya per-say (as in I find her amusing and don’t think she’s irredeemably evil), but she’s a total bitch!
This could lead to Conquest/Ken – Kenquest I believe someone proposed? Malaya should hook up with Ultra Car too (OTP!!!) – Perhaps we can call it the Multra pairing? Or the Totes Bitch(y)in’ Car pairing? Or something…
Ken is contemplating having sex with someone who isn’t the object of his affections for the sole purpose of manipulating the emotions of the object of his affections. That’s shitty person-being right there. That’s why it’s a big deal to me.
Arnold removes the emotional manipulation from the equation and says “do the hot girl”. While that’s not great person-being, it’s one hell of a step up from Ken at the moment.
But still quite a fall down from Mike. ‘s all about perspective.
I believe Arnold is saying that shouldn’t be Ken’s “sole reason,” he should enjoy a beautiful woman on her own merits, not merely as a means to seduce someone else he likes.
Not all men are wired for casual sex.
Exactly. If he’s already going through the trouble of being a horrible person by trying to make Malaya (another horrible person) jealous, he might as well go full force and sleep with the attractive woman who wants him.
Honestly I think Ken’s problem isn’t that he won’t sleep with Conquest because he’s not attracted to her. It’s because Ken is so super into Malaya that he’s doing it to get her attention. His love for her is blinding him to better opportunities because even Conquest, who has only slightly better social skills than Galasso, treats him better than Malaya. The problem isn’t that he doesn’t want Conquest…It’s HOW MUCH he wants Malaya
If he doesn’t want to do her, that’s fine. It’s just that no one wants to hear him whine about it.
Actually, I would respect him a lot more if he didn’t want to do it for other reasons, like just not being into her or not liking empty one-night stands. However, his reason is that he’s blinded by obsession with a girl that has made it extremely clear that she will never like him, and the only reason he’s contemplating it in the first place is to use her to manipulate said girl, treating both of them as tokens to be played or won.
Plus, he comes off as the kind of guy who’d turn down a free lunch because it has pickles on it and then complain to a homeless guy about it, which, depending on Arnold’s love life, he may actually be doing right now.
The 40 year old virgin crew would say he’s putting pussy on a pedestal.
I tried that once. Cat got pissed and scratched the hell out of my forearms.
Wow! Arnold must have shown restraint not to give Ken a dope slap.
Keep yo’ dope hand strong.
Like your post OverlordMikey, I agree with you that there are guys/girls out their that don’t really want to jump on an offer of sex just for the sex. However, a lot of people feel the need to be perceived as fitting into the current scene. So, maybe Ken is fitting in, he dosen’t strike me as a free-thinker. Apparently he has no common sense whatever, or he would not be chasing Mayla. As far as Arnold seems to be concerned, the problem dosn’t exist, but maybe not for the ‘I should be so lucky so why are you complaining? as maybe go away your interferring with my gametime?
dang no editing button…shouldve been ‘go away you’re…”
Sounds to me that Ken might not be in a state of mind where he’s ready for someone like Connie. For reals, he shouldn’t go if he’s not comfortable with it. :-/
Is there such a state of mind?
I can see Ken’s point here. He never wanted to sleep with her, he just wanted to do a fake-out make-out in front of Malaya with a girl that Malaya said was attractive, in order to get her attention in a, “I can get girls this pretty but I prefer you” kind of way and now she’s all,”Sleep with me” and Ken doesn’t particularly want to, especially since Malaya wont be able to see and therefore care. So what’s the point? I can see the problem.
And that problem is kind of compounded by the generic assumption that “if you can get laid by a hot girl, you should, what the hell is wrong with you.” That sort of society expectation that makes it hard to figure out what he really wants from that situation.
Granted, what he really wants is just to make Malaya jealous, which isn’t the most noble of goals, but, well…eh.
I dunno, if Ken’s the sort of guy for whom an emotional connection is more important than just some sex, it’s kind of…well, not quite a “go to my roommate” conundrum, but maybe not that cut-and-dry.
Poor Ken. You are such a Nice Guy, toying with your first truly shallow act.
I’m really hoping he gets to not be obsessed with Malaya for much longer.
I can completely understand where Ken’s coming from. There are guys like us who just can’t jump into bed with a random stranger, no matter how hot she/he is. We need there to be some kind of emotional connection, perhaps even love, to be there first before we can press slimy, mucous-covered body parts together.
First time I’ve wanted to reach through the screen and strangle a fictional character in awhile. And yet it’s quite understandable that he’s just not into Conquest. So yeah, you’ve scrambled my brain Willis.
Arnold really is the wise one in that household.
You know what would really impress Malaya? A threesome. Everybody wins(except Leslie).
Hey Arnold! (Sorry couldn’t resist.)
Classic “nice guy” behavior here. Passing on the hot chick for the chance of getting with the girl he really wants that doesn’t want him.
And told him she doesn’t want him.
EPIC FAIL.
But “nice guys” always go for these hardass bitchy chicks in the hopes that they’ll fix them and make them the girl of their dreams. People don’t know that about them.
Watch as he works harder and tries the same thing again with Malaya.
Not knowing the bridge has been burned already.
Dude, man up and move on.
‘s the best thing he can do.
That’s a good point. A “Nice Guy” tends to see his actions in terms of relationship points (as in, “I bought her a present, she should like me. I helped her move, that’s worth a kiss” etc). Passing over no-strings sex with a hot girl, but torturing yourself over it* can make him feel like a martyr (“Look at what I gave up for you!”) who is earning his boy-gets-girl happy ending when really…the girl of his affections just does. Not. Care.
*(Again, unless his reasons for passing it up are wanting a genuine emotional connection. But more and more I think that’s not the case, especially given…y’know…Malaya.)
I’m really having a hard time seeing him as “expecting” payback from Malaya; he certainly hasn’t hinted at it in any way to her.
Sometimes guys just legitimately don’t feel like being wanton, guys.
At last! More Arnold! Thank you, Mr. Willis, I needed an injection of sanity!
Willis! Why haven’t we moved to a Arnold-once-a-day-every-day-forever! format yet?!
Because the strip would then also be all about Ken and/or Malaya.
Every day. FOREVER.
Because we need to get to Ninja Rick killing spiders first.
Giving that Ken does not really want to sleep with Connie I think it would probably be a bad idea…
I always like when Arnold is around. He amuses me.
Poor Ken. Although, I’m not entirely sure that he an Conquest would be a good pair. He’s not exactly the alpha male type that she seems to be suited for.