I was talking about the way she’s staring aimlessly at her device and only making a token attempt to acknowledge anything going on beyond that tiny screen. I concede that, overall, Malaya is nothing like Gaz.
For some values of the word “sacrificed.”
Virgin or not, though, I think Ken sacrificed his innocence as soon as he came up with his “make Malaya jealous” plan.
What a like about that boob window is that it actually looks possible (seriously boob windows and cleavages that make wonder where did their nipples went have really become so common it’s annoying) Hell, you can even wear a bra with that one!
So I can understand Malaya’s complete ambivalence towards Seth there, but she’s not even looking at the hotness that is Conquest? What the hell, Malaya?
I’m betting it’s an iphone- I’ve seen my sis with that posture over hers sooo often playing a game, not to mention it’s an in thing for people like her.
Nah, the placement of the little black dot for the camera looks off. My bet’s still on phone- maybe one with a keypad or something. She was using one almost the exact same color in her first appearance, though that one didn’t seem to fold out. *Has officially put way too much thought in this*
Also, her not knocking video games is probably a good survival instinct in this house. She was unemployed for six months, remember?
You know, not that I want to give Ken ANY excuse to keep going down this somewhat self-destructive path, but I would expect Malaya to register a little more surprise at this, assuming she actually heard him correctly despite her divided concentration.
Light socket ….. where is that?
All I see is what is supposedly a badly drafted duplex electrical outlet.
Also there is no such thing as badly drawn when it comes to “modern art”.
If it takes a panel of experts a couple of hours to determine whether a piece was produced by a famous zoo animal, a famous modernist artist or what was left after the dog that ate the kids paints.
I know I’ve been ragging on Ken for the last few updates, but I don’t think ANYONE deserves to have “equipment” sprung on them when they aren’t expecting it.
Sure they can; she has an entire network of Ken-wannabes who wish they could be him and she goes through them everyday and tells them they’re pathetic and to get over her, but like Ken; only less Ken-like, they continue to cling on to some small and deluded hope that she gives to shits about them. Occasionally some of the less worthy fall away and she deletes them…
Soon it will be revealed that when she’s not around the spectacularly strange and maladjusted normal cast of the comic, and not working retail, Malaya develops a bright (if somewhat shallow) personality and has scores of somewhat shallow friends among the popular caste of her age group.
Leslie died in a car crash with/in Ultra Car who is also completely wreaked and effectively dead meaning Malaya has lost the two people she was pretty much closest to at the Toy Store… she will effectively lose her will to live…
This proposal seems really tasteless for some reason, but I can’t quite put my finger on why…
That would just cause Robin to devour all the Skittles in the world and run so fast backwards it reverses time so she can save her lesbian and her car friend.
It would be a bit of a twist if Conquest and Ken actually become an item.
Ken becomes the “Heir” for Glasso so that Conquest can finally move on past all his previous abuses.
While in some ways I’d like Ken “to get some”, not like this. While it was Conquest’s idea to have sex, it was Ken who stooped to the low tactic of trying to make Malaya jealous and asked Conquest for help. That’s just morally distasteful.
Prediction: Ken does actually go through with it, and then he becomes the manager at Conquest’s store. We find out right after Amber says yes to the offer, which is hilariously no longer on the table.
Ken’s newfound wealth is then used to continue to thwart Ethan’s toy collection, as per the running gag.
This then actually pisses Malaya off, as she’s tired of being a peon at Shortpacked and thinks she somehow deserves a better job. She starts sucking up to Ken, who is by now wise to the fact she doesn’t like him.
…Ok, couldn’t say that with a straight face. Really, he gets her a job in hopes of winning her love, and she gets even more pissed when she learns that he’s not getting her a manager position: it’s just another peon spot.
Malaya reminds me an awful lot of Gaz from Invader Zim in this comic.
I can kind of see that. They have similar people skills.
Gaz has people skills, she just works through intimidation. Malaya doesn’t have that ability. I’m sure she would like to though.
/\ This guy. Gaz is borderline evil mastermind. Malaya… Not so much.
I was talking about the way she’s staring aimlessly at her device and only making a token attempt to acknowledge anything going on beyond that tiny screen. I concede that, overall, Malaya is nothing like Gaz.
He’s not going to go through with it.
Maybe Arnold will step up to the plate?
Why would Arnold having sex with Ken make Malaya jealous?
I think this calls for Joe’s intervention. Shame he hasn’t been introduced in this continuity yet.
um…he was introduced about 14 years ago in this continuity
Yeah, Joe is in literally the first comic of this continuity. At least, his feet are.
And has even appeared in this comic, at that. Robin, Ultra Car and Jacob have all seen him for storylines.
He’s Ultra cars dad even. Maybe the beard threw people off?
http://www.shortpacked.com/tag/joe/
Captain Studly sounds like the best superhero ever.
Unfortunately, they got the wrong person to play the role.
Unfortunately Robert Downey Jr. already plays a character in the Marvel movie canon
For a man like Captain Studley, you want Nathan Fillion.
That is some truly impressive formalwear. Boob window, leg-slit towards the front. Fits her.
Also reminds me of her original outfit, only… less revealing.
It’s like a sexy summoner’s robe or something. Also DEM HIPS.
hard to believe there was no heir siring with those babies.
Well, she tells Ethan she uses birth control.
Looks more ceremonial than formal to me…
And I kinda dig it. I’ll have to see if I can get one for my wife.
That would be why it reminds me of the distinctly ceremonial outfit she was wearing in her first appearances.
If you find one let me know please, I’d like one for my own significant other.
Dress looks ceremonial… Ken’s a virgin… Oh crap, he’s gonna get sacrificed isn’t he.
For some values of the word “sacrificed.”
Virgin or not, though, I think Ken sacrificed his innocence as soon as he came up with his “make Malaya jealous” plan.
Wouldn’t those ones be red, so the blood stains aren’t so eye-catching?
for my *self*
Fixed it for you.
Well, it’s for me in the sense that I’m the one who will enjoy it the most…
What a like about that boob window is that it actually looks possible (seriously boob windows and cleavages that make wonder where did their nipples went have really become so common it’s annoying) Hell, you can even wear a bra with that one!
Soon Ken and Ethan will have one more thing in common.
two more if he feels guilty afterwards.
Three more if he didn’t remember the prophylactic.
Four more if someone abruptly tells him he’s gay.
Five more if he sprays his crotch with Lysol after hearing what else she’s had sex with.
So I can understand Malaya’s complete ambivalence towards Seth there, but she’s not even looking at the hotness that is Conquest? What the hell, Malaya?
Remember, she figured out that she’s not gay.
She either has seen her already and doen’t care or she’s just too hooked on that Gameboy thingy.
It’s a phone grandma
Aint most smartphones held in a portrait way, she’s holding it landscape style.
I suspect that it’s an iPhone in a pink case-thing.
A Phone Grandma? They make those now?
and/or pa
If I wasn’t even-tempered, I would bop you with my white-cane.
It’s a Ds isn’t it? and funny, videogames are the only thing I haven’t hear her think is “lame” unless my memory fails.
I’m betting it’s an iphone- I’ve seen my sis with that posture over hers sooo often playing a game, not to mention it’s an in thing for people like her.
I doubt it, that thing has most definately two levels… could be a phone though XD
Nah, the placement of the little black dot for the camera looks off. My bet’s still on phone- maybe one with a keypad or something. She was using one almost the exact same color in her first appearance, though that one didn’t seem to fold out. *Has officially put way too much thought in this*
Also, her not knocking video games is probably a good survival instinct in this house. She was unemployed for six months, remember?
sometimes I am not sure if Malaya would prefer survival to insulting…
You know, not that I want to give Ken ANY excuse to keep going down this somewhat self-destructive path, but I would expect Malaya to register a little more surprise at this, assuming she actually heard him correctly despite her divided concentration.
But why would she care?
Because Malaya secretly loves Captain Studly…
…she thinks of him like he was her dorky, but still loved brother.
But does she have the capacity for love? Note, narcissism does not count.
Because she had the hots for Connie? Admittedly, anyone would.
Oh Connie, you’re prepared for everything aren’t you?
No, she’s not. That’s the problem, she doesn’t have the equipment she needs.
Is that frame on the wall supposed to have a poster in it?
that is the best purple painting I’ve ever seen! You take that back!
Oh, it’s one of those modern art pieces. I apologize for my boorish sensibilities and lack of artistic… something.
(David could auction it off as adspace!)
I kinda like the idea that Arnold is just into abstract modern art. Explains why that light socket is drawn on the wall with crayon.
Light socket ….. where is that?
All I see is what is supposedly a badly drafted duplex electrical outlet.
Also there is no such thing as badly drawn when it comes to “modern art”.
If it takes a panel of experts a couple of hours to determine whether a piece was produced by a famous zoo animal, a famous modernist artist or what was left after the dog that ate the kids paints.
I… I’m afraid to see what Conquest’s room looks like.
I’d be afraid to walk in there without shoes on.
…and a bio-suit.
“Nuke the site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.”
Game over man, GAME OVER!
“Hold on a minute … This installation has a significant dollar value attached to it.”
screw it, they can bill me!
Ken just won first prize for biggest fail of the week….a several levels.
Yeah, he’s officially a douche now.
I dunno, there’s a couple days left of ther week, he could still fail harder than this.
I like to imagine Conquest has a stock room of stuff for just such an occassion and a rack to transport it.
One doesn’t have to imagine the aforementioned transport…
Ah, so that’s what the chest window is for – access to the Victoria’s Secret compartment.
I know I’ve been ragging on Ken for the last few updates, but I don’t think ANYONE deserves to have “equipment” sprung on them when they aren’t expecting it.
Sprung? It’s spring loaded?
I can’t imagine a time I would be expecting that.
Clearly you should never go out with Haruko Haruhara
It’s a shout out to Lupin III who did it decades earlier.
I know…I didn’t think it mattered really.
Wow … that’s one hell of a chasity belt!
Malaya seems unnaturally entertained by that cheap digital camera.
I’d guess she’s texting people, but that might suggest she has friends.
Perhaps she’s going through her address book and telling everyone what nerds they are.
They can’t be that nerdy, they have somehow acquired her phone number
Sure they can; she has an entire network of Ken-wannabes who wish they could be him and she goes through them everyday and tells them they’re pathetic and to get over her, but like Ken; only less Ken-like, they continue to cling on to some small and deluded hope that she gives to shits about them. Occasionally some of the less worthy fall away and she deletes them…
This is her hobby…
Soon it will be revealed that when she’s not around the spectacularly strange and maladjusted normal cast of the comic, and not working retail, Malaya develops a bright (if somewhat shallow) personality and has scores of somewhat shallow friends among the popular caste of her age group.
And Willis rides off chuckling into the night.
I assumed it was a portable console.
That’d be nerdy!
I bet 10 Locknar’s Ken does not get laid.
I’ll take your 10 Locknars and Raise you 20 Rupees
30 quatloos on Conquest being intrigued by these human “emotions” and studying them with Ken.
DILBERT: That’s less than a penny!
ELBONIAN HEAD OF STATE: You are mistaken, sir. It is MUCH less than a penny!
I see your 30 quatloos and raise you 10 emerald broams
He’s gonna wimp out at the end, guaranteed.
You mean Quatloos? I think there was only one Locknar. And a martial arts Stripper with a bird and a sword killed it. Because of a Pact.
She was wearing nothing but a bra, some boots, a thong, some…belts?..straps?…and middle thigh boots at the time.
I’m reminded of Woody Allen’s movie Sleeper in which the female lead tells her boyfriend, “Well, we could have sex but there’s only the two of us.”
“I was hoping we could have sex but we didn’t get enough people [at the party].”
I have a feeling that Malaya is being distracted with horrible news she’s receiving via text.
“damn, just got a promotion”
The Text?
Leslie died in a car crash with/in Ultra Car who is also completely wreaked and effectively dead meaning Malaya has lost the two people she was pretty much closest to at the Toy Store… she will effectively lose her will to live…
This proposal seems really tasteless for some reason, but I can’t quite put my finger on why…
cuz it spontaneousely kills off two characters that have huge fanbases.
or just the impossibility of Ultra Car ever giving Leslie a lift.
Unless he was crashing into her. Then he’s just a dick.
That would just cause Robin to devour all the Skittles in the world and run so fast backwards it reverses time so she can save her lesbian and her car friend.
Honestly I think Conquest and Ken would be good for each other. She needs a figure in her life who she doesn’t have to prove anything towards.
And Ken needs someone willing to actually accept him.
Yes! I was starting to feel like I was the only one shipping Kenquest.
It would be a bit of a twist if Conquest and Ken actually become an item.
Ken becomes the “Heir” for Glasso so that Conquest can finally move on past all his previous abuses.
“Transformers Ninja” is almost sorta kinda a similar skillset to “Batman.”
Kenquest! I’ll ship it just for the namesmush.
Let it go Ken! Just get jiggy with Connie! Your pipes will be clean and you’ll be a man!
I wouldn’t describe myself as feeling particularly “clean” after an encounter with Conquest, myself.
Just like Chris Elliott!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxxNvfVfDB0
While in some ways I’d like Ken “to get some”, not like this. While it was Conquest’s idea to have sex, it was Ken who stooped to the low tactic of trying to make Malaya jealous and asked Conquest for help. That’s just morally distasteful.
Stupid Malaya, looking like a girl I like in real life. >_>
I am in AWE of how unsympathetic Ken is in this storyline.
But he’s still timid
OMG, Ken is starting to sound like Faz! O_O
Er… what sort of thing?
“Knock yourselves out.”
Prediction: Ken does actually go through with it, and then he becomes the manager at Conquest’s store. We find out right after Amber says yes to the offer, which is hilariously no longer on the table.
Ken’s newfound wealth is then used to continue to thwart Ethan’s toy collection, as per the running gag.
This then actually pisses Malaya off, as she’s tired of being a peon at Shortpacked and thinks she somehow deserves a better job. She starts sucking up to Ken, who is by now wise to the fact she doesn’t like him.
…Ok, couldn’t say that with a straight face. Really, he gets her a job in hopes of winning her love, and she gets even more pissed when she learns that he’s not getting her a manager position: it’s just another peon spot.
Or even better, he gets her a job and Conquest fires her for her attitude/language on the job.
Even better yet, she makes Ken do it.
Is Conquest cosplaying as Emma Frost?
I was wondering, her outfit does look familiar. But I don’t think it was Emma Frost…
Why am I flashing back to the 70s Buck Rogers show?
Well…the hole in the chest showing the cleavage suggests Power Girl.
Mmmmmm… Princess Ardala…
My guess is Ken will not go with it. But if he does it will be hilarious!!
I hate her…
Who? Guess who
Ken?
I’ll say this for Connie, she’s very considerate.