Shortpacked! by David Willis
Toys are serious business.
Convention appearances:
Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Multiplex
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
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Delicious babies…
… Okay, I’ve lurked long enough to know you change your gravatar every so often. What comic is this from?
She’s Gertrud Barkhorn from Strike Witches.
Keeping the world safe from pants!
Well pants are a threat to testicles, they can cause them to overheat and thus adversely affect sperm production, therefore they are true enemies of mankind.
That actually kinda looks like an “I EAT BABBIES” face… o-O
Leslie: I just like babies… specially with barbecue sauce.
The best way to prepare babies, just shake then bake.
I personally prefer kids in the 6-7 range. Old enough to have some muscle, but still nice and tender. Put them on the grill, add some salt, maybe a bit of lemon juice. Nice and tasty.
Well, that sounds like a modest proposal to follow
*GAG*
Sorry, sometimes my imagination is just too vivid.
As a certain personage who went all viral used to say… “I just love children, but could never eat a whole one.”
Whoah Leslie, calm down.
Leslie adores children….but she could never eat a whole one.
Winter from Girly could.
Well, she was a special case.
Which is too say she was a very special nut case.
Thank goodness for Tupperware and refrigeration.
Cut them up and divide them up to the whole family
Bleurgh, the milky aftertaste…
Babies. Boil em, Mash em, Stick em in a stew.
Get in mah belly!
I swear, some of Robin’s personality must be sexually communicable, because I could totally see her doing that. And she was able to make Leslie put on a catsuit and try to force gay guys to hook up. She’s contagious, I tell you!
We DO know she can give off a contact high. This is just the result of long-term, intimate exposure.
So Robin is a living, breathing STD?
WHOA!
There’s…probably another reason why Robin was able to convince Leslie that they should both put on leather catsuits. I don’t know if Leslie was aware of it, though.
*cue Mordin Sex Talk*
/\ This.
Don’t… *ahem*… ingest. *awkward silence*
(my FemShep romanced Liara)
Same chemicals, actually.
Babies are evolutionarily designed to be adorable, it’s a fact.
Not just human babies either. It’s the reason babies of many species make you want to hug them to pieces. Apparently wild animals instinctively appreciate cuteness too.
So why do I want to cuddle other animal babies, but not human ones?
The same reason hairless kittens are nowhere near as cute as fluffy kittens, human babies lack fur.
By way of demonstration, puppies.
I think my own personality might be a combination of Amber and Leslie’s. I know on one level my recent baby fever is just hormones and evolutionary instinct and all that but at the same time “BABIES!”
So Leslie has the baby fever huh? Well there’s nothing stopping her from going the single mom route.
Well that’s part of it, but I think Leslie wants the whole family deal and considering the legal circumstances not to mention cultural obstacles she can’t have that.
Not to mention the difficulty of getting David Crosby to donate some sperm.
Babies cause cuteness overload fever like puppies. But at least after a puppy grows up into a dog and stops being cute, it dies at age 10 and you can get a new puppy. With a baby it takes way longer. Get a puppy, Leslie.
To paraphrase Amber, it’s evolution’s way of ensuring that even after watching a mother struggle through the pain of delivery, and watching the parents run themselves ragged caring for it afterward, childless friends and family members will still suddenly find themselves wanting one of their own, so overwhelmed are they by the cutness.
And Leslie already has a cat.
Dogs never stop being cute!
I believe I’ve been too damaged/desinsitized by puppies wrecking my stuff and having 3 younger siblings (and teaching work) to get a big “cute” reaction from either.
Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t want any children of my own, but cute doesn’t factor into it at all.
It’s so PINK.
Yeah, newborns have that. Their circulation systems are still getting worked out and their skin’s all thin and newborn-y.
She looks sort of grayish purple to me.
She’s blueberry smoothie colored.
Its skin is probably normal colored under the bloody uterus slime that newborn babies come out coated in.
Dude, they wash that off before they swaddle them.
They do, but I held my son for a bit first and he came out clean except for a few smears under his armpits and stuff. That whole dipped-in-jello is Hollywood shorthand for “This baby has just been born.” They’re damp, but not gross.
Cuteness proximity. Works for everyone with SOMETHING.
Also, NO AMBER! Only have this one! You can’t give your secondborn to Galasso if you never have a second child!
Yes, the concept of Galasso getting another child to ruin worries me THAT MUCH.
So you think being raised by Mike with Uncle Faz is the better option?
Yeah, these kids are going to be pretty screwed up. So they’ll fit right in!
Well do we want a Conquest 2 or a 3rd Mike?…hmmm… no brainer…
Not just Mike, Mike with elements of Faz.
It’s like if 4chan took human form. That’s gotta be in some book of dark prophecies somewhere.
Wait, that’s my nightmares. “And the cloud became darker, heralding the herald of the apocalypse as she brings for countless troll from under the bridge to wreak untold havoc and destruction to mankind. However, one man will ascend to a higher plane and the whole world look up and yell save us and he will whisper “No!” and ascend along his merry way” and then clowns burst through my front door.
Eh, they’re getting Faz and Mike either way. At least this way they won’t have to deal with Ninja Rick.
Good point, though.
Donna’s so pink she’s almost a light purple of Leslie’s shirt… coincidence of her namesake’s color being purple
That’s so babies.
That’s so babies, it’s Donna Mae Warner!
There’s a good idea for a spin-off.
Is that… Is that Shortpacked! Babies? Because I would read that. RELIGIOUSLY. Holy cow, Donna and then the Leslie-baby (since she seems to want one) and the Galasso-baby and maaaaybe a Jacob or a Ken baby? Running around doin’ baby things in nappies, like Jump Start? YES THIS PLEASE.
This is indeed literally SO babies.
Is she foaming at the mouth?
She’s got lesbies.
Or babies
BAAAAAABIES. Yeah, my reaction to babies is pretty much the same as Leslie. Complete with the slightly manic look. They’re jut so cute!
My sister did a similar monologue after her twins were born. Only she ended it with “Well, in your face Evolution, I’m fucking done with this shit.”
if Leslie had twins, one of them would be Gallasso’s
If Leslie had twins, that would be a whole storyline in and of itself…
The Joevatar works well for that comment. It’s like he’s seriously considering the possibilities.
Leslie is me.
Admittedly, I get all “Babies! Eee!” myself even though I never plan to have any ever and fully intend to stick to raising kittens while doing pediatric nursing, but I like kids just fine. I fully intend to spoil any future nieces and/or nephews shamelessly.
For some reason your gravatar and your comment seemed fitting.
Well, considering how she takes care of the Cake twins, you may be onto something there.
Well, considering how she takes care of the Cake twins, you may be onto something there.
I hope that’s face isn’t the baby’s first memory.
This is so babies…
Babies indeed, good sir.
Had one. Love her dearly. One is enough.
I think I’d keep Leslie at a distance just for a while. She looks a bit demented. Then let her babysit, give her a chance to change diapers and do round the clock feedings, every 2 hours for the first couple months till she actually sleeps for 4 hours at a time. Till you have one you never realize how nice it is to finally be able to go to the bathroom by yourself after 2 years of ‘where are you mommy, whatch’ doin? And yes it is worth it. Every minute of it. (just that I am easy to satisfy, once was enough).
Yea, my wife originally wanted four kids, after two she decided that was enough, probably because each kid was getting bigger, second kid was over 10 pounds, no problem finding her in the hospital nursery. I think she was afraid a third kid would have been a potential Guiness world record holder. Never had the night feeding problem, both kids would eat about ten, then sleep until 8 the next morning. Our friends with kids hated us.
Her torso? I guess it counts, but I imagine more her upper torso whenever anybody says that word. I’d go with “lower abdomen” LOL
Or maybe even “pelvic floor”?
Then again, I’ve never given birth to anything, so I don’t know exactly WHAT hurts. I would imagine the parts the baby squeezes through hurt the most? :p
Pregnancy effects everything from the breasts on down, including breaking your back. Especially considering how freaking huge she was.
Love how you both have the Doctor Rachet gravitar.
Frankly I’m surprised that she was able to keep her composure that long…
i would love that foaming, rabid leslie as my gravatar, so much win
Willis, every timeI read ‘Dumbing of Age’ and ‘Short Packed’ I think of ‘Ninja High School’. You even remotely look like Ben Dunn. Hopefully, you heard of Ben or NHS, otherwise I am senile, ranting abour the past. “THE WORLD WILL BE SAVED BY STEAM!!”
Jesus, it’s been YEARS since I’ve heard about Ninja High School. The days when being a weeaboo was a novel thing…
Why, he’s not shamelessly ripping off Rumiko Takahashi constantly.
Heh. This is the opposite of what I usually see in world — parents being all hormon-crazed and thinking the baby is oh so cute and special and they’re the first people to’ve had one, and then acting all uncomprehending and offended when other people aren’t impressed enough to put on a Busby Berkeley dance routine in praise of the newborn.
Give me a kitten any day.
What I’m learning from this is Leslie vibrates at the sight of babies. Wouldn’t that make her more desirable as a lover if not for the terrible implications that 1) a crib must be present in the bedroom, and 2) the baby is definitely not going to be her’s?
Also: Plasma…what comic is that Gravatar from?
Time for Leslie to break out the turkey baster?
“Less rapey, more drunky.”
“That’s still pretty rapey.”
What is that from? I recognize it but I honestly have no idea as to its origin.
http://www.shortpacked.com/2006/comic/book-3-is-totally-gay/03-when-amber-met-nathan/meredith/
huh…. being a mom makes Amber look a bit like hers…
It’s the drugs and lack of glasses.
BABIES! Courtesy of Nutrigrain breakfast bars
…and to think that in Oz, Nutrigrain is advertised as “Iron Man” food.
But…I feel GREAT!
Leslie, that was seriously creepy.
I am extremely meh about all babies except my nephew. Furthering my theory that my lesbianism is nature’s way of giving my nephew more toys. JOHN-JOHN NEEDS ALL THE TOYS.
*spazzes, shrieks, and flails about* omfggggg ; v ; <3
I KNOW YOUR FEELS, LESLIE.
Leslie raises an excellent point.
It’s probably possible that Robin could get Leslie pregnant, y’know. Give her enough sugar and she could totally do it.
Maybe it’s because I’m male, but babies do nothing for me.
I feel like I’m missing out on a free hormone high.
I guess I’m just several levels of wrong..because I hate babies and children, specifically *other* people’s children/babies.
I know I’d love my own if I had any, but I positively go “ew ew gross gross” when I see other people’s babies. I find them cute and yet at the same time revolting. I feel the same with small children. I don’t even want to *touch* them, much less a wailing tiny pink *thing*. (shudders)
I pretty much have Leslie’s reaction to most kids, but I really don’t want one of my own. I think I may adopt somewhere down the road, many years from now.And I like how Amber is aware of the memory-killing hormones. I just found out about those last year…very interesting. Explains so much.
Hey What’s that ticking sound coming from leslie?
So has Robin imprinted yet?
Here’s somethin’ wierd: I’m not even sure that I want one and it’s a bit too early for me to be thinkin’ about this stuff (only just got into college, so I have school to worry about instead), yet I already know what name I’d want for a theorhetical son (it’s Isaac).