This weekend (March 30-April 1) I’m going to be at Emerald City Comic Con in Seattle! You’ll find me with Blank Label Comics at booth 210! Come see me there! I’ll have books and posters and doodling abilities at the ready.
Shortpacked! by David Willis
Toys are serious business.
Convention appearances:
Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Multiplex
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Tags
amber
animated
batman
botcon
conquest
conventions
dark of the moon
david willis
dinobot
drew
duncan
ethan
faz
galasso
generations
gijoe
guest strip
hamsters
homosexuality
jacob
jesus
joe
justice league
ken
leslie
malaya
megatron
merch
mike
ninja rick
nipple
optimus prime
politics
religion
robin desanto
ronald reagan
roz
sdcc
sg ravage
shattered glass
star wars
tni strips
transformers
transformers prime
ultra car
©2005-2013 David Willis | Powered by WordPress with ComicPress | Subscribe: RSS | Back to Top ↑
WHOOPS
The look on Amber’s face in that last panel is priceless
that’s the universal sign for everything going downhill
You know, in some ways it’s even harder to deal with the death of an unloved one.
But wouldn’t that spill the beans on the fact that Amber and Faz are related?
It’s starting to seem like there isn’t anyone except Faz who doesn’t know already.
even all the customers, and people who don’t know faz. Heck, we’ve never been to ShortPacked and we know
I think that’s kind of the point. Amber’s character wouldn’t willingly tell Faz for the reasons she gave earlier. So now she’s in a situation where she feels she really has to.
Thing is, though, why?
Faz didn’t know him before; he has no idea if the guy is alive or dead, right? Because if he knew who his dad was–or did he already know, and just didn’t know that he was Amber’s dad, too? Oh now I am confused.
But if he didn’t know who his dad was then telling him now that he’s died, when you’ve known for a long time who he was, is kind of a dick move, isn’t it? “Hey, uh, so yeah, I know who your dad is. And he just died. So now you have no chance whatsoever of meeting him, getting to know him, or dealing with any issues with him directly with him. Happy Easter.”
I now predict that that is exactly what Mike will do.
I guess if he did know the guy was his dad then osmeone ought to let him know, but if he didn’t then let that sleeping dog lie. I suppose finding out who was your father and that he’s dead is one thing, but finding out that all of your co-workers knew who he was for a pretty decent stretch of time and didn’t tell you until after he died is something else, to my mind. OTOH Faz might be so angry at that information being kept back until he died that he no longers desires Amber’s lady-parts.
Yeah, but what if somehow he found out on his own somehow and that everybody knew but didn’t tell him? Would that be a bigger dick move than telling him when he did’t know?
That’s the fun thing about secrets like this. After you stall for a certain period of time your window to tell the person expires and then you’re a dick no matter *what* you do. This sort of conflict has done a very effective job of driving plots for decades.
What would Mike do?
Would he tell Faz about his Dad including the fact that Amber and everyone else knew about his father for ages in a classic dick move or will he trick/force Amber to do it?
I think you shouldn’t tell Faz. Yes, his father died but remember it’s thanks to him that we have this creepy guy hanging around and hitting on his own sister.
When did it get definately, 100% confimed that they’re definately related anyway?
Robin had their DNA tested about a year ago.
Robin had their DNA tested. Robin. I would be willing to believe she screwed something up.
You’re not suggesting that due to a mixup it turns out that it is Robin and Faz who are related to each other?
WHAT A TWIST!
Ethan: “No one pays attention if everything’s going well. There needs to be drama.”
*Galasso ponders*
Galasso: “I have brought back Amber’s dad.”
Ethan: THE BIGGEST SPIT TAKE EVAR
*sound of Amber’s brain breaking*
Willis, now that you have mentioned the wolverine option you MUST draw it. The Gods of the Internet demand it.
Really, we don’t need Wolverine hijacking this comic… as awesome as it could be.
and here I was just going to post that link… guess I got beat to the punch with the reference.
Ah well.
Now I’m picturing Wolverine getting hired at the store (all it would take is somebody mentioning ‘Wolverine Publicity’ around Galasso, and he’d show up in panel six) – and then having arrived do nothing but be a store clerk. A grumpy surly store clerk, sure, but no fighting or killing or the like; just clerking. That would seriously be hilarious.
Logan: “I’m the best at what I do – and what I do, isn’t very nice”
Amber: “You keep saying that, but you’re still under your CPR quota. You should take lessons from Mike. And put out that cigar while you’re at it.”
This. I want this, very much. *cracks whip*
“Faz, I don’t know how to tell you this but…your father’s ship was sunk by the Neptunian Space Navy. His last words were ‘Tell the many virile and mighty sons I have left throughout the galaxy that I love them, and they should honor my memory by never hitting on anyone named Amber. Because I was totally smuggling a boatload of amber when I was attacked, so it would be a little rude.’ “
“Faz is saddened by his departed father. Faz would also like to illustrate by this chart that Faz is not “hitting on” Amber, as we are soul mates and destined to be together.”
Oh
SHIT.
Amber seems to have a lot of disdain for her dad…In those first few panels she looks like she wishes she had a hand in it…but that’s just me.
Well, her dad is an abusive son of a bitch.
Was.
Abuse is gift that just keeps on giving … like having to talk to Faz about getting time off to go to the funeral and meeting all his relatives.
You don’t stop being an Olympic swimmer when you get out of the pool; you don’t stop being an abusive son of a bitch when you stop breathing.
You do stop being a Vegan when you start eating meat but you don’t stop being a cannibal even if you haven’t eaten human flesh is years, how is that fair?
Because being vegan is a phase, being a cannibal is an *identity*.
Tell him Amber. He might feel so upset that you withheld this information until it was too late he’ll never hit on you again.
Or the news might convince Faz that they must immediately conceive a child together to preserve their father’s glorious dynasty …
Better not tell Faz.
And suddenly it’s not just about you and your feelings anymore…
erp
That is what Amber should have said in the last panel. To go along with that “erp” face.
Tell him. He should know regardless of being a complete … whatever he is. Amber has had alot to deal with and she does already know that he is her brother, not like that little fact will be dumped on her. Who knows, Faz may recognize the fact that she is married and pregnant and not to or by him. And therefore will ride off into the sunset. Yeah right.
A complete Faz.
There’s really no other term to do him justice.
Sorry, not ‘married’. Anyway, most normal people would back off as soon as they found out they were related to their love object…well most anyway.
And normal and Faz should not be in the same sentence.
Well you could say that the “Normal Faz” is an outlier on any other statistical distribution.
The question is… when he’s told will he show genuine human emotion, or somehow try to use this information to his own ends?
*plays George Michael’s “Father Figure” on the Muzak*
Well, he did act normal enough the last time he and Amber talked about him not knowing his father. Normal for Faz, anyway.
And what will happen to the smug grin on his faaace?!
It will be bludgeoned off with a femur to the face. His fathers femur.
YEEEEAAA-ah shit. . .
Wait, who is gonna tell Dorothy her dad died?
Dotty isn’t in this universe as far as I am aware.
She is, she’s just in a different state, closer to where Joyce, Walky, and Sal live. She’s nowhere near San Fran.
Dorothy’s dad died a long time ago in this universe.
She exists in this universe? I don’t recall her here offhand.
She’s in the Joyce & Walky strips, which cost $35 total.
http://shortpacked.bigcartel.com/
How did I know that was coming?
So not only do you find out your abuse, violent asshole of a father died, you also get to tell Faz his father’s dead? Wow. This almost compensates for the turtles thing.
It’s twin-win!
Don’t do it, Amber. It’s a trap. He’ll demand sympathy sex.
Why are people so good at using a poker face while saying one of their loved-ones died? Its so hard to tactfully scope out the situation to find out if you should provide sympathy or offer a traditional truism.
Because often the alternative is bawling your eyes out, which may not be socially acceptable at work, or in a grocery store, or…
I’d say that if they’re calm they probably don’t care too much, but if they’re fairly stiff and clipped and distant, they’re trying to hold it together.
You’re probably not going to go wrong with “I’m sorry to hear that,” though. They may always answer, “Yeah, so am I because now I can’t kill them myself,” after all. And that will be your hint.
Usually “I’m sorry to hear that” would be a line I’d only use if they weren’t close to the deceased. If they were close, I’d usually offer up one choice expletive along with a heart-felt admission my inability to relate, possibly followed by a hug or an offer of assistance.
I don’t see why they’d have any obligation to tell him. Is the information somehow relevant to him? I mean I could’ve seen a case for being obligated to tell him who his father is since there’s medical applications for that information. Good to know if your genetic predecessors have a history of heart conditions and such. The death though? So a guy he never met died. I’m sure another few strangers died while they were having this conversation.
…oh yeah…
Welcome back to the Awkward Zone, Amber. Your usual seat is waiting for you.
The look on her face at the end is priceless.
Okay, I get that her dad was not a very grand person, but this is ridiculous. You don’t act like this toward a recently deceased family member, abuse or not. Realistically, the pain would be greater because children will still care about their parent and despair because they couldn’t have a happy end to the relationship. It’s a psychological hangover, no one would be this blasé even as an emotional act.
You forget that not only is Amber pregnant and very emotional, but that her father was a person she didn’t like. She’s putting on a front to keep herself from losing her cool over a man she hated.
Huh. I’m not gonna go into my gf’s life story again, but…
Yes, yes you CAN be happy a parent is dead. You can even be amused by the fact that the last thing you said to them in life was “drop dead.”
It’s RARE, but it can happen. Therefore, any response can happen.
I knew a girl who was in Amber’s approximate situation. Her abusive, pill-popping mother finally OD’d about 15 years too late to make a difference.
And by “too late” I mean it was 15 years after the girl had turned 18 and gotten the hell out of there. She told me in all that time her mom never once expressed regret for what she’d done or tried to reconcile. The only contact they had is that every now and then she’d get calls or emails trying to guilt/blackmail/threaten money out of her.
She told me that there were a few family members who tried to get her and her siblings to go to the funeral, but pretty much everyone else knew why it was better they didn’t. At some point it was healthier to Not Care, because being emotionally invested in such a train wreck was almost as bad as living with her.
Kind of in the middle here. When my mother OD’d about 10 years after I ran across the country. Everyone else in the family mostly came to understand why. (Hell Dad was pissed at some family members who didn’t stick around for the burial) However, up to the last time I saw her, mom was still in denial trying to get me to “come home”
When I first found out about her death, I was more concerned for my dad than anything else. I flew down to be with family and that’s about it. I didn’t even really have much of a reaction at all until the funeral itself. I cried and going through that helped me finally move on in some ways. So I’m personally glad I went both for myself, and my Dad. Well, also to help get some legal stuff done that kept my sister from screwing over our dad, but that’s another story.
However, I can definitely see several situations where someone either wouldn’t want to go, couldn’t go, or hell even sort of celebrated such an event. I know damned well that, compared to others, I’m lucky. I even have a very good friend I grew up with who considered the couple who later adopted her to be her real parents.
How can you assert this confidence? Some people have extremely shitty relationships with their parents, to the point that when one of them dies, their only response is “good”.
Blood relationships mean nothing. If a person is an abusive jerkhole, then that person is an abusive jerkhole and you cannot force his or her natural children to love or care for this jerkhole just because they’re biologically related.
“Okay, I get that her dad was not a very grand person, but this is ridiculous. You don’t act like this toward a recently deceased family member, abuse or not.”
Sure you do. If he was an abusive prick and you care nothing for him, then why not treat him like that? Why do people think a person’s death magically takes away all the horrible stuff they had done in life?
Love isn’t magic either you know. You don’t have to love your parents. If you love anyone who abused you through most of your life, there is something wrong with you.
@Steven: Just because you are closely related to someone doesn’t automatically mean that you will be sad with their passing.
In fact there are plenty of cases where the only tears they shed are crocodile-tears because they either hated that person or their deaths benefited them in some way eg: gaining an inheritance from a will.
“Okay, I get that her dad was not a very grand person, but this is ridiculous. You don’t act like this toward a recently deceased family member, abuse or not.”
Oooooooooh, yes people do.
Oh, it can happen. For some people who’ve been in Ambers situation, they can even be happy when the parent is dead.
DOesn’t happen every time obviously, but people are complicated and different people react to things differently.
OK, not to stir the pot in here but I’d like to ask the following question. How the heck do you know Faz and Amber are really related? Was a DNA test done? Do we have actual proof of relation or are we just basing this BS on idiotic assumptions like “they look alike due to height and hairstyle”.
And for the record, I was thrilled to hear Amber’s dad bit the green burrito of death. The way I see it, its one less buoyant turd polluting the human gene pool.
They look nothing alike, but there was a DNA test done about a year ago I believe.
Robin tested their DNA while they slept…like forever ago.
And holy crap, now I’m all caught up. Feels weird.
Don’t worry. You’ll get used to it.
And then the daily withdrawal will start kicking in. Sometime around each lunchtime, usually.
…..Now I’m confused. Am I you, or are you me?
Or are we all, together, connected somehow, in the greater scheme of things.
Yes, so says the living force. Master Qui-gon Jinn was truly wise
Oh this is not going to go well at all.
I predict Faz’s eye’s will actually show when Amber tells him and then he’ll think of more way’s to try and get her to sleep with him.
Man I like Fazz, I hope one day he achieves his dream of making it with a woman.
You mean an actual flesh & blood woman or does inflatable count?
Okay woah, why exactly do they need to tell him? For one, I don’t remember Amber ever getting definitive evidence that Faz is really her brother. And either way, I think the emotional consequences of telling him “You’re actually my half-brother; we didn’t let you know because our dad is a total scumbag but now he’s dead so you’ll never find that out for yourself” are much worse than just keeping him out of the loop.
Never mind on the first point, but I still think it’s an awful idea.
Can I tell him? Can I? Can I?
“Dude, you know Amber’s dad just died? Well before he did, he banged your mom. Later!”
at least amber will get the thrill of finaly maybe crushing faz with the news his father is dead for throwing the wolverine into her dads casket would be a waste of a perfectlly good wolverine
GOD DAMN IT!!!Oh man why did this image have to end up being on Friday!!!
This makes me think fondly to the future, when I get to find out MY abusive piece of crap father dies. I’d shout it from the freakin’ rooftops and damn the consequences because WOO!
It was great meeting you yesterday. Thanks again for all the great work. Cheers!
- Satyros Phil Brucato
arpeggiothecomic.com