Shortpacked! by David Willis
Toys are serious business.
Convention appearances:
Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Multiplex
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Tags
amber
animated
batman
botcon
conquest
conventions
dark of the moon
david willis
dinobot
drew
duncan
ethan
faz
galasso
generations
gijoe
guest strip
hamsters
homosexuality
jacob
jesus
joe
justice league
ken
leslie
malaya
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merch
mike
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optimus prime
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robin desanto
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shattered glass
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©2005-2013 David Willis | Powered by WordPress with ComicPress | Subscribe: RSS | Back to Top ↑
Ouch…?
Hidden depths, beaches! W00t!
Got to watch out for those hidden depths at beaches, especially where there’s a strong undertow.
Dammit Willis! See what your punchlines do!? SEE WHAT YOUR PUNCHLINES DO!?
Not while he’s drawing great racks, he doesn’t.
Helicopters are indeed sweet.
And Leslie just got emotionally punched in the metaphorical nuts.
Feeling sorry… for… Malaya?
System error, here.
It counts as a sign of the coming apocalypse.
The Mayans were right!
Mayan…Malaya… is there a connection between the two?
Nope, no connection at all. It’s just a coincidence.
omfg malaya has a soul
And I always imagined when we found her soul it would be clothed in soiled rags and shackled by the ankle in a drippy, old dungeon.
Apparently she also has a nice rack.
Aliens.
I’m not saying it’s ancient aliens, but…
…what? I said I’m not saying it.
It looks like an awkward silence, but actually Leslie can’t hear a damn thing Malaya just said. Helicopters are loud.
WHAT’S THAT MALAYA? I CAN’T HEAR YOU ON THE COUNT OF THE HELICOPTER.
CAN’T SAY “ON ACCOUNT OF” FOR THE SAME REASON.
Cue bitching about how Malya’s not allowed to be a likable person in 3…2…1…
Hey, haters gonna hate.
[as countdown completes he opens his mouth to complain]
I – I can’t – I feel bad for Malaya right now…
What Leslie said seemed to really hurt her – and we’ve gotten a few glimpse of genuine humanity from Malaya combined with her proving she really does care about Leslie which makes the impact all the more believable…
This feeling bad for her thing… It’s an odd feeling – similar to indigestion really, but a bit more bittersweet…
I don’t get it, though. She’s mean and unpleasant. She heard a rough truth about herself–the only thing that the only person who can stand her can think to complement her on is her chest size. If it sparks some character growth, that’s excellent. But I can’t really feel bad for her.
This. I’m all for giving her a fair shot if she shows some development from this point on, but up until now, we haven’t seen her be anything but horrible to anybody but Les, one customer, and MAYBE Ultracar.
That’s the thing, though. Malaya was already en route for character growth. She genuinely appreciated how nicely Leslie treated her, despite her flaws, and wanted to be a better person in response. That’s the most selfless feeling Malaya’s ever expressed. And in return for it, she gets “Nice tits.”
Still confused, possibly just by the phrasing. Malaya is an awful jerk to everyone. Leslie is nice to her. Malaya is nice to her–and only her (still says mean things where Leslie can here her too)–and up until this very moment, the only reasons we’ve had for this were a) Malaya thinks Leslie is hot and b) possibly to irritate Robin. So Malaya is pleasant to Leslie. And in response she gets more than “nice tits.” In response, Leslie is nice to her. The problem came when Leslie’s mother said, point blank: “What do you like about her?” Up until now, Malaya has done nothing worth liking aside from being interested in Leslie. Is Leslie supposed to say something about a beautiful soul? Or about Malaya trying to be a better person (something we haven’t seen any of)?
She gets what she gets. Leslie isn’t being callous–there is just genuinely nothing nice to say about Malaya at this point aside from the fact that she’s cute.
^This. Also, the other part of it. “I’ve had a LOT of failed relationships.” Well, Malaya – maybe that’s the point to take a look at the common element(s) there and make your changes based on that, not based on who happens to currently be around you that you might be interested in? (Just an idea, y’know.)
I don’t know that I agree 100%, but very well articulated.
Not understanding or having interest in Ethan’s geek hobbies doesn’t really count as being “an awful jerk”, -outside this comment forum, anyway.
Make a snide comment when your coworker (and the good friend of the girl you like) tells you, very happily, that she’s pregnant is pretty much a dick move, though.
No, but it very much is adding insult to injury to add a snide comment to the same coworker that she took one of his few pleasures from the job away from. So yes, that one is an “awful jerk” move.
See, that’s the thing about Malaya. Yes, it is good that she recognizes Leslie’s good points. But until she finds some real good points of her own, it in no way redeems the ways she’s acted to her coworkers and housemates.
Trying to be a jerk and being a jerk are not the same thing. It seems that Malaya doesn’t mean to be a jerk, she just comes off that way.
That is what she said. I don’t think she comes off as a jerk, I think she is a jerk but want to own up entirely to Leslie.
…Oh god damnit. I just figured out where this is all going.
This is going to show two things. First, Leslie is going to realize/ admit that Malaya is just a rebound. That she doesn’t REALLY like her in a romantic sense, and is still holding a torch for Robin, and is just using Malaya to forget Robin.
Second, she’s going to realize that she understands Robin’s position better, having Mal crushing on her and she being unable to fully reciprocate the feelings. She’ll realize that she kind of forced herself onto Robin, and though it worked out at first, she should have been more understanding of Robin’s unease. That Robin didn’t really mean to hurt her.
This will all result in Robin and Leslie getting back together.
I have no idea of where Malaya will end up in all of this.
Damn you, Willis, I like Leslie/Malaya!
Why, exactly? Malaya is basically pinning the majority of her hopes to improve herself on a relationship with Leslie. She is making her self-improvement dependent on the emotional health of a relationship. Do I need to point out where that is generally very much Not a Good Idea? =\
Give me a relationship in this comic that isn’t based on very much Not Good Ideas.
Well, Drewthan wasn’t a bad couple for a while there. It just got bad when Drew made Ethan feel like he was trying to change him further and further.
Oh my god, is that CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT?*Dramatic music*
Dun Dun Dun
Here, use THIS!
As long as it is a button and not a tag
I was right. Fallout is interesting.
My comment was blocked by SOPA, as referencing the
Comic constitutes copyright infrigement. I’m going to be
Indefinitely detained under that other new law now.
Though that was nice of them to allow you to post the comment.
Yeah, they said it was fine as log as I didn’t mention Candlej
And that’s very nice of Mr. Jack to post it for you. Hah, try and get me now, Candle.
At least you didn’t mention the HypnotALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD
You’re doing it wrong. First you say Candle Jack and th
What a nice guy that C.J. Hah, try and get me now, Candle Ja
Candlejackcandlejackcandlejackcandlejackcandlejack!
I did it! I finally did it! I ESCAPED CANDLEJA
Y’know, it’s weird. This whole thing has made me think long and hard about what exactly Leslie sees in Malaya. And I can’t think of anything. I mean, Malaya’s been nice enough to Leslie, but nothing about their interaction stands out as something to found a relationship on.
On a side note, if Malaya’s treated her past relationships anything like she’s treated….well, everyone but Leslie, than the “mutual respect” bit’s kind of her fault.
Yep. I think Leslie’s fooling herself into thinking she likes Malaya for any other reason than being attracted to her. And pushing herself into the relationship with Malaya isn’t doing either of them any favors.
Of course her temperament could be a product of failures as opposed to a cause…
Or it could be a chicken-and-egg scenario. They mutually reinforce one another.
On the one hand I call shenanigans – Malalya clearly liked Les before she knew anything about her, therefore a relationship based on physical attraction thing is mutual.
Then again, she’s since gotten to know her a lot better and clearly finds other things she likes about her than the physical aspect. I think some of today’s rebuttal is of the ‘guilt trip’ nature, but I also think it’s also genuine.
So I must applaud you Willis, you have done what 6 months ago I would have thought impossible. You have made me sympathize with and even actually start to like Malaya, without utterly degrading and humilliating her (ala Faz). Well played sir. Well played.
Yeah, same here. Maybe my memory’s gotten fuzzy, but I seem to recall her blowing off everyone else who might have been nice to her and zeroing in on the cute blonde.
HUG HER. Wait, not immediately, I mean… Well, crap. Now they’re both dead.
Now you have done it! *tsk tsk*
Worst date ever!
I could probably think of a few episodes from “How I Met Your Mother” that had worse first dates. But then I have to remember Ted plots and he’s the least appealing character on that show.
I meant worse dates, not just first dates. Stupid lack of an edit.
YAY! Character development!
Er…nope. Sorry, Malaya, you really don’t get to treat the wide world like crap and then complain that nobody appreciates your “good qualities.” You haven’t actually shown any “good qualities” so how can you make Leslie feel bad for not being able to come up with any? The best anyone can list is “well, she speaks her mind,” but if nine times out of ten, it’s in the most hurtful way possible and only serves to make other people feel bad, it’s not really that good a quality, is it? Certainly not one that makes people, even Leslie, want to be around you.
It’s a shame that your past relationships sucked, but that’s not Leslie’s fault. Not a whiff of sympathy here.
That’s just how some people act. When shit happen to them, they treat the world like shit. I recall a guy said to me “When the world give me shit, I give shit back to the world”.
So you have to have good qualities in order to be hurt when feelings you thought were mutual are revealed to be unreciprocated? News to me.
No, but if you treat people like crap and are then upset to find out that nobody likes you for who you are, well…you can be as hurt as you like, but I don’t understand why I’m supposed to feel sorry for you.
That’s just because you’ve never been hurt so badly so consistently that it ruins your outlook on life and other people, and you start treating the world like it has treated you.
See me after class. I can fix that.
No, I don’t think you can presume that. Laura just might be better at taking personal responsibility for personal responses.
and yet you like Mike (probably). a guy who is an absolute asshole to everyone he meets unless he is drunk.
just playing devil’s advocate here…
Who the hell feels SORRY for Mike?
Laura’s saying she doesn’t have any pity for Malaya, and that she’s getting what she deserved. Isn’t that…true?
I mean, hell, nobody throws a fit when the characters state the very true fact that Mike is an asshole. I don’t think anyone’s said that he’s [i]pitiable[/i] or [i]sympathizable[/i].
That is the unmitigated truth and get this, even Mike knows Mike is an asshole.
As for Malaya (plus the rest of the cowpat+Fan crowd) there is no excuse for “giving the world shit when the world gives me shit”. Why? Because its not the world doing it. It is one or two people, who may deserve comeuppance or not (heck YOU might be the cause), but not the old lady across town or the kid in the stroller or your coworkers at your new job.
I prefer the smile and keep moving forward. To give a helping hand to those causing me pain, including handing them the rope to hang themselves. I’m such a helpful person *smiles*
Well Malaya, it seems we have a conflict of interests.
Inspired to be a better person?
When and where did she put this into practice? Because I sure don’t recall it.
She had four pages before the introduction of the alleged source of inspiration. I doubt we’d be able to identify improvement if we saw it.
Does that mean she was an even worse person before meeting Leslie? Yikes.
Always the glass half-empty, Malaya. She should be, “Someone likes my rack! WOOHOO!!!!”
_Robin_ would’ve taken it as a compliment…
Leslie now gets to feel guilty about not being a better, more forgiving person and thus has to forgive Robin…
This may be off topic somewhat but why did you change the links from red to dark blue?
They are really hard to see, especially for someone with terrible eyesight such as myself.
Now they have turned dark red… what is going on?
Looks like a site redesign. Do not adjust your monitor.
We control the vertical.
Unfortunately, Starscream controls the horizontal.
STARSCREEEEEEEEEEEEAM!
Now it’s back to bright red.
MUCH BETTER!
And Dinobot controls the z-axis. =D
Yea I have always wondered why Malaya was interested in Leslie so much. It wasn’t kinda nebulous the first time they met.
I do feel really sorry for Malaya, she may not be nice but there is a past there that is worth exploring. I like her.
The nitpickers are going to say that the helipad should be marked with a letter H inside a circle, not an X. But I’m not one of those. I’m just wondering why the new header has thrown all the formatting out of whack.
Here’s hoping Leslie has dainty li’l feet if she’s gonna put ‘em in her mouth like that.
See? And nobody believes me when I tell them flavored toenail polish is THE FUTURE!!
Not character-related, but the website looks really out of wack on my end (blog box covering up part of the comic, ads all on the bottom, etc). I’m using chrome.
I had that problem too on Chrome. Then I set the page back to 100% viewing and reloaded. Problem solved.
Am I the only one for whom the page layout is screwed all to hell?
Me too. I can’t read what Malaya’s said because there is now a big white box over it that contains the comic title.
If the layout looks wack, just refresh! (Or possibly ctrl-refresh or shift-refresh or whatever tells your browser, no, really, please stop using the cached copies of this site’s style files.)
Thanks Ryan.
The current site format is messing with the comics
I never understood why people disliked Malaya. Actually I have never disliked her and she is one of my favorite characters. Furthermore, how can people criticize her for being rude when they like characters like Mike and Faz who are infinitely worse. And I like both of those characters!
I don’t see why this should be trouble for the relationship either. Leslie should just explain that her relationship is stressed with her parents, and she was so frustrated trying to deal with them that she couldn’t think up something intelligent on the spot. It’s the truth and it makes complete sense. And then maybe come up with a few positive qualities that aren’t so shallow. That would be more than enough to make up for this flub.
This comes up every Malaya strip, and I think the big difference is that in Mike’s case, it’s comic sociopathy–he’s unrealistically cruel to the point that it becomes funny, like a Looney Tunes short. No one knows a guy who would fly hundreds of miles just to see a girl’s face when she finds out her online boyfriend cheated on her. He’s stretched to the limit, and that’s hilarious, because it’s not realistic.
In Faz’s case, he gets what’s coming to him almost every time. Mike beats him to a pulp, Amber screams at him, whatever, some kind of karmic justice happens. Faz is a little more realistic in that there are guys who approach women with that kind of attitude, though possibly not such cartoony guys, and even better, seeing him get his comeuppance is positively therapeutic.
Malaya. Willis did a fantastic job creating her, because she could have walked straight out of real life. Most people know a person, or people, who act like Malaya. People who are so wrapped up in themselves and their “cool” attitude that they don’t see or care about what makes other people happy. People who hear someone excited about a hobby or an upcoming event who have to make some kind of disparaging remark about how lame it is. They suck all the joy out of a room just by being in it, either by saying whatever carelessly hurtful thing they’re thinking, or because after a certain point everyone knows that person is going to be carelessly hurtful, and so everyone else makes it a point not to talk about anything they enjoy anywhere within earshot of said person.
Mike and Faz always felt like one-note characters, gags not to be overused, though Mike has had some character development. Malaya felt like a well-rounded person from the get-go, not a joke, so it’s less easy to just think “Oh, that wacky Malaya!”
On the subject of Mike, I’m of the opinion that he doesn’t get kicked in the balls nearly enough.
Actually – and this is quite frightening – some people actually do act like Mike. I know a few.
Maybe, but it’s more likely that someone like Malaya exists, rather than someone like Mike.
And besides that, when she acts like an asshole, it’s only rarely funny, whereas Mike is a human punchline. When he’s a jerk, it’s funny almost every single time, so that does make a difference in how we think of her.
Not to the point of setting to blaze others that act like that, surely?
Sorry, but I never thought of Mike as funny, just more a-holy.
This might be why more people are feeling bad for her here, then – because she’s more realistic than the other characters of her ‘ilk’ in the strip. I’ll be honest, I don’t necessarily like her (yet), and I don’t think this sole moment of emotional injury makes up for her attitude up to this point, but that doesn’t mean I can’t feel bad when life, specifically a part of her life that she’s shown some genuine appreciation for, takes a dump on her, in a sense.
I mean, outside of those who truly earn some kind of karmic retribution, I doubt a lot of people wouldn’t feel even a pang of ‘ouch’ when someone gets an emotional gutpunch.
Goddamn, Malaya has the cutest little face ever.
The fact that Malaya is now included in the banner suggests that she is going to become a member of the main cast for quite a while.
Ryu’s not in the banner! Does that mean he’s going to go away? OH NOES
FATALITY?!?
HUMILLIATION! *dances*
Malaya’s pointy booms aside does anyone notice that Leslie’s face in the last panel reminds them of someones art style? I cant pin point it but I’v seen it before. Pooch Cafe, maybe?
MAN this seems really unfair, you dont ask someone just getting into a relationship why they like someone, you get in a relationship with someone to find out why you like someone.
Could it be her mother assumes house-sneaking and helicopter-borrowing is generally a prelude to sexy-times? If that’s the case, it’s not quite as out of order for a parent to assume (hope?) that their kid actually has a relationship with the person they’re trying to get with?
If you’re getting into relationships with someone you can’t think of any reason to like, you’re probably doing it wrong.
Nah that has pretty much no bearing on whether you’re doing it right or wrong.
LADIES AND GENTLEMANS
WE HAVE
LIFDOFF
You are the first homestuck I’ve ever seen who’s read this comic. Props, man.
What, noone’s told you about the stairs?
Whaaa? There’s probably a billion homestuckers here. Just not the annoying ones who put references in where they don’t make sense, like most sites do.
This reference was fucking beautiful
That is precisely what I thought.
My word! Leslie is staring at Malaya’s rack mighty hard in that last frame.
This is where I do not like Malaya as a “person” 1: She was given FREE booze 2: She was complimented on by someone she likes 3: Gets an awesome helicopter ride as a date with Leslie
And what does she do she complains about how Leslie couldn’t think of something better on the spot when asked point blank by her mom in the middle of the night “why do you her”
Why can’t she wait until the ride home to drop this question instead of the midnight helicopter flight.
… you’d really prefer someone that smiles and pretends they’re completely happy and then throws a hissy fit once they get back home, making you wonder what the hell you just did in the car ride home to upset them so much?
uh, yeah? FREE BOOZE. You can at least wait till later, or tomorrow. It’s free booze!
But to be serious for a moment, I think Malaya SHOULD feel this way, and respond this way. I would. But still… how much of it is Leslie’s fault, and how much did Malaya bring on herself by having no redeeming qualities? I dunno, this is complicated stuff.
You know, I’ve actually ALWAYS like Malaya. Sure she’s a bit off an asshole, but unlike the others she’s never horribly broken someone’s heart. She’s just rude.
I do find it odd how strongly people are reacting to her poor social graces. I mean yes, she’s a crude, lewd dude. She’s got a skewed perspective so she eschews. She gets excluded and secluded for being rough-hewed. She obtrudes and stews because she got chewed for pursuing and wooing despite her sour moods from which she concludes that she’s been misconstrued, but since when was it such a crime to be rude?
Nice. Very Dr Seuss.
I still can’t see the bottom two panels of the comic…Hopefully this gets fixed sometime as I quite enjoy Shortpacked! and am missing it.
To quote Ryan above: “If the layout looks wack, just refresh! (Or possibly ctrl-refresh or shift-refresh or whatever tells your browser, no, really, please stop using the cached copies of this site’s style files.)”
It worked for me!
I just checked the website again now and it works. Yay.
Aww. And Malaya shows a human side at last…
I feel, Willis, that you’re trying to make us like Malaya. It’s not working. But you’re getting very close to it.
UI am not so sure liking is the operative word here. She is still very unlikable, even if she is physically cute, due to that possible birth defect. An inflated ego with a side order of nasty. I have a sister that I love from afar but moved closer very like her. Lucky, for my sister, she met someone who can put up with her way of interfacing with the world.
As dysfunctional families go, at least we are still talking to each other =P
Poor Malaya… ;~;
I get the impression from Leslie’s face that she was kinda hoping for something a bit more shallow and this sudden revelation of depth from Malaya is as throwing for her as it was for many of us.
… this comic hits me A BIT TOO CLOSE TO HOME. Except for the lesbian part.
So… Ladies who you fancy get upset when you compliment them on their homerian chestaffixations or you don’t like it when a gentleman compliments your chest area?
Of course, I guess it could be the part of not finding anything likeable about a person you hardly know besides physical attributes. That hardly seems likely though.
Maybe a helicopter fell on her/his house because the lesbian flying it was too busy looking at her girlfriend’s rack. Happens more often then you think.
Just a heads up, the site has been broken on my iPad in safari since yesterday. Comment’s and blog post cover the bottom half of the comments.
It’s not just you. Apparently Willis upgraded his web site software or something, and there were complications.
If you’re still seeing problems, it’s because your iPad Safari still has the broken style sheet cached. If there’s a way to ditch it and refresh, that’ll solve everything.
Comic
Heh heh heh.
It Begins!
The Helicopter has it’s own tag, it must be spidercar!
Helicopter is going to become the new main character of the comic. Brace yourself for wacky slapstick adventures!
I would enjoy that. Slapstick involving Ethan, Blades(the helicopter), Ninja Rick, Galasso, Faz, and Ultra/Spider-Car. Perhaps even a frustrated Robin. But neither of these two. Leslie’s lost her wacky adventures privileges for a year. =P
Leslie is almost straight-up Doug Funnie in that last panel.
She always did remind me of a more subdued Patty Mayonaisse.
So Leslie, the nicest character, is now being unfair and insensitive to Malaya, one of the meanest and most unlikable characters. Role swap!
Mike is by far more mean than Malaya. By far. He’s just more likeable than she is – because he’s funny to us readers, and in-comic presumably he has godlike pheromones or something, since there’s no other explanation.
Leslie’s always had something of a superficial eye when it’s come to her romantic pursuits, but how is she unfair? Beyond physical appearance, what makes Malaya attractive?
It’s true. People deserve to be acknowledged for more than where they keep their spices.
The question here is whether to take Malaya’s statements at face value (she is feeling bad that Leslie is reciprocating her honest admiration and respect with “nice rack”) or whether she is trying to manipulate our sweet Leslie with crocodile tears and a guilt trip designed specifically to make Leslie want to prove Malaya wrong.
I am very interested to know how we got from “Leslie’s fun to mess with” to here. (http://www.shortpacked.com/2011/comic/book-13/03-fishin-chicks/namebadge/) Either end of this timeline can mean a lot more than it seems to mean.
I’m gonna guess that her initial reasons for flirting with Leslie gave way to genuine affection somewhere along the line. It happens a lot.
If so, it sure would be nice for someone (MALAYA) to acknowledge that.
If Leslie can fly a helicopter, what’s she doing working at a grocery store / toy store?
I suspect it isn’t a high demand skill set. You see a lot more want ads for people that can drive a stick than people that can fly a helicopter.
Why do I want to hear “Ground Control To Major Tom” playing softly behind panel 5?
something broke when i look at the page through firefox. the blog entry is overlapping the comic.
They should be talking through the intercom system. All the helicopters I have been on are too noisy to talk without electronic help.
Is the helicopter a sarcastic robot? That might help.
Or maybe the helicopter can blow up and Leslie and Malaya are lost in space and time and they have to punch out dinosaurs and survive for millions of years before they find Galasso dressed in furs in the Pleistocene era trying to start a toy store in a cave so he can rule the whole plateau… then…I dunno…maybe he pees on the 2001 monolith or something and it shocks his pecker?
Damn you Willis! Now I’m sympathizing with Malaya more than Leslie? Nooooooooooooo!
Leslie has always been a sucker for looks. According to Robin (as she angrily told Malaya) Robin’s hot bod was a deep temptation to Leslie – and then she went and proved it.
I don’t buy that this Malaya is the same character as the previous Malaya. Not literally – I don’t think she’s been body-snatched or is a good twin or whatever – but I have a hard time feeling any sympathy for her because in a heartbeat she went from being an insulting, unlikeable douche to being the same emotionally aware, self-analytical, expressive communicator that many SP!/IW! characters become when they they’re in drama-land.
I can buy that she’s had “hidden depth” all along, and maybe the appearance of shallow douchiness was her way of protecting her vulnerable inner core or whatever. But what I don’t buy is that she has the emotional vocabulary and perception to say what we just heard.
On the other hand, maybe this is exactly how real-life abusive partners work – their ability to switch between uncanny depth and mindless hurtfulness is what keeps their victims around despite their better judgement. (Not that Malaya has abused Leslie, but looking at the broader pattern of her behavior.)
She’s still as shallow as she ever was; she just has those emotion thingies. Which she’s always had. It’s just that “I’m annoyed to be here and annoyed to have to put with you” were predominant in her mind in many of her prior scenes, whereas she cares about the person she’s with now.
And Malaya has always been nice to Leslie. If you see any variance in her treatment of Leslie then it’s entirely in your own mind.
Right through the heart!
I am kind of like Malaya and it’s hard to read these comments with people calling her a bitch and a terrible person.
She’s been hurt, people. A lot. I’m actually the opposite of her. Instead of a series of failed relationships, I’ve had no relationships. But I’m just as bitter toward the world and hurt as she is.
For this reason, I will always like her, no matter what anyone else decides to say about her.
People who call Malaya a bitch just have no sympathy and are guilty of the very same thing they accuse her of.
I’ve had failed relationships and have some calluses on my heart. I still do my best to keep my reactions to things in the proper perspective, not as a reflection on my own character, but on the failings of the other person, where appropriate. Doesn’t change that Malaya is a bitch and gets no sympathy from me. If she’s bitter about it, she chose to be that way. It always comes down to personal choice. If Malaya chooses to be a bitch to others, and only nice to this one person (and said person’s mother, to try to impress her) – that speaks volumes about her lack of character. I feel bad that she’s had failed relationships, not at all that she’s chosen to be bitter for it.
If you’ve had no relationships, look at it this way – you don’t get to carry around annoying relationship issues. What’s there to be bitter about there?
The fact that nobody wanted to be with me comes to mind…or are you pretending to have the IQ of a rock?
Nice! Veiled insults to someone who was just asking a question.
A stupid question.
In case you forgot, you asked: “Why would someone who’s never had a relationship be bitter?” Really? REALLY?
NO. What I said was:
“If you’ve had no relationships, look at it this way – you don’t get to carry around annoying relationship issues. What’s there to be bitter about there?”
In other words, hey, congratulations! You’ve gotten to miss out on the stupid self-doubt, the regrets, the self-recriminations, the scars and the terrible feelings that never fully go away, only lessen with time, that only another person can make you feel after you’ve had the chance to open your heart up to them, and they just treat it like it’s nothing. That is what I was angling at.
I said I never had a relationship. Never said I was never in love with someone.
Look at it this way: at least you got to be with the person you loved.
Ha. Tell that to the unnecessary damage she did. Yes, being alone can cause damage too. I went through that side of it when I was a teenager. I’ve found though, that when I compare the two times, the “I’m alone and dateless because I’m trying way too hard at this”(my personal hang-up at the time), and the time of “ugh… why am I bothering at this, again?” – the one without the scars was generally the happier one. =\
I’m more disturbed by the hypocrisy.
I see a lot of Mike vs Malaya arguments…
Yes Malaya’s a bitch.
But Mike is an asshole and the people who hate Malaya tend to love Mike.
Almost everyone loves and tolerates Mike and hates Malaya…
Why? [Insert justification that honestly doesn't work here]
I like Mike, but he’s still an asshole. Apparently it’s okay because he DOESN’T feel bad about it at all and fesses up to it. Sure he’s not even all that nice to the girl he plans to marry, but whatever…
Malaya is unpleasant so she’s – somehow worse?
I think there is a bit of a double standard going on…
Mike has no reason to be the way he is yet apparently he’s fine…
Malaya may or may not be the cause of her own problems, but has problems that make her the way she is… The complaint seems to boil down to “she chooses to be a bitch” which doesn’t make sense in the Mike vs Malaya comparison because Mike is an ass for no reason.
Unless they think Mike makes no choices…
Then again he is a force of nature, but pretending he is on a normal human’s emotional range for a moment…
Honestly though – I don’t know if I like Malaya and I know I like Mike, but I find the fact (and I hope this is just a coincidence) that the guy can be an asshole and everyone cheers him on well the girl who is an asshole and everyone treats her like she’s scum.
Although she is more realistically mean which may be why it is harder to swallow and why Mike is considered funner to watch. Plus people have known Mike longer.
My biggest issue myself is some people are basically : I will NEVER like Malaya; EVAR! She deserves no redemption – ignore any human emotion she shows!
That’s where I get mad – besides my guess is Leslie and her will break up with Malaya in a way that totally has you sidin’ with Malaya…
No – I don’t think Malaya is nice, but I also don’t think she is some demon incapable of redemption either…
I think some of the hate also comes from Robin/Leslie shipping too – I won’t say where I fall on that issue…
Everyone’s worrying about Malaya/Leslie or Robin/Leslie when there’s a third option.
It’s possible Walky’s got plans (he has PLANZ!) to have all three in an open relationship and that way no one has to feel like they they ‘lost’. I can see all three of them living together in a relationship.
It’s a stretch, but it’s possible…
… YES.
This is written by David Willis, not T. Campbell. XD
There’s a line in ELFQUEST about threesomes. “Such an arrangement can only work if all three parties like each other… very, very much.”
In Fans, Rumy and Ally spent a year before the marriage, and more time after it, slowly building to the point where that relationship was a true threesome. But even in their early history, when they were actually physically threatening each other, there was a grudging mutual respect between them.
Malaya and Robin don’t even have that. They wouldn’t last thirty seconds, even if it turns out Malaya’s bi after all.
The new layout does not agree with my computer
I think the real funny part is the fact that without Malaya having a microphone this conversation couldn’t happen. Helicopters are LOUD. The only way to talk to each other is via an intercom.
Last thought before today’s comic posts: Nope still don’t like Malaya.
Awwwwwwwwww-kward D: