Shortpacked! by David Willis
Toys are serious business.
Convention appearances:
Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Multiplex
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
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©2005-2013 David Willis | Powered by WordPress with ComicPress | Subscribe: RSS | Back to Top ↑
OH NOES SHARKS
(are they from a lake in Indiana?)
Galasso’s just crazy enough to know DoA exists?
he moonlights as a pizza chef, of course.
except….not.
He kidnapped them from the lake. A lot of kidnappings happen involving that lake, I’ve been told
Um… sharks are salt-water fish. Unless there is a salt-water lake somewhere, there are zero live sharks in a lake.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freshwater_shark
So what are the sharks gonna eat now?
Presumably a shelf and a couple of cash registers.
And two counters.
And various assorted impulse items which is good since that’s where the candy is usually at.
Hey, at least they’ll get sugar and maybe some protein.
Yeah, but giving sharks a sugar rush is not good idea.
Who cares about those sharks. I don’t see them armed with frickin’ laser-beams!
And they’re not even swimming in acid or anything! *sadface*
If the Transformers ailse at my local TRU is any indication… Electrostatic Jolt and DOTM Sideswipe. Maybe a couple of ‘bees and left over Tuner Skids.
Each other?
Aspergic asian girls?
Now I want a shark pit to feed my enemies to.
whatever you do, DON’T GET IT FROM IKEA! trust me, they leave out 1/3 the parts now it opens from the bottom.
You know, I really want to be surprised…
But all I can think is “Just a shark pit? That’s all?”
Actually, I think I might’ve felt better about being laid off this way, like BECOME ACTION HERO IF YOU WANT TO LIVE
I know, they don’t even have any fricking lasers.
Exactly! Everybody knows they aren’t really evil sharks if they don’t have frickin’ laser beams attached to their foreheads!
FEED THEM TO THE SHARKTICONS!
Oh no there go the . . . Super rare transformer toys everyone is looking for?
I’m sorry, I don’t know current toys, so just assume I said the current hard to find toy went into the shark tank and picture Ethan diving in after it.
Transformers Prime Voyager Bulkhead? Thing is packed one to case with THREE friggin’ Optimus.
beanie babies. i think that’s the new thing right now.
That answers the question why we don’t see the old seasonal employees.
Though it does raises a question: When do Galasso feeds the sharks?
whenever someone does not buy a CPR.
Oh so THAT’s where those River Sharks come from…
Where are the frickin’ laser beams on their heads?
The lasers were replaced with underslung grenade launchers.
You put the grenade launchers under their bellies?
That seems dangerous….
And it might chafe horribly.
I believe that is the point of adding the grenade launchers.
Chafing? That’s pretty evil.
Does this mean the whole series has Jumped The Shark?
No, I don’t see anyone jumping over them.
They were given the opportunity, but did not jump at the call.
I think that the trope Voodoo Shark is more applicable here.
It did that long ago, I’m afraid.
In webcomics, the shark jumps woo!
This just made me think of:
“Guilty or innocent?”
“Innocent.”
“Feed them to the Sharkticons.”
So Galasso is actually a Pretender Quintesson?
But where is his other four faces?
Well, there’s the one that demands fealty, the one that scorns fools, the one that commands fear, and the general purpose confused one.
A shark pit? I thought Galasso’s more of a “release the man-eating lion” type of guy.
Harder to store under the fur.
I would think it was much easier to store a lion under fur than a shark.
I totally wasn’t going to apologize for my spelling error cause I didn’t think anyone would point it out.
I meant floor. Fur only works the other way around.
You mean “fear the wrath of my panthers!”
But… that’s really more of a Kim Jung-il thing.
“Feed them to the shark pit!!”??? So what the pit is hungry and not the sharks? By the way it cant be a pit since it’s filled with water. It should say “Feed them to the shark tank!!” “If you’re jokes aren’t going to make sense anyway, then the least you can do is use proper grammer.
Dude, just relax. BTW, you misspelled grammar.
(not aizat)
Huh?
Spelling has nothing to do with grammar. I’m off the hook.
You have a problem with grammatical error, I have a problem with spelling error.
You forgot to add an ‘s to the word error in each case in your last reply. We’re going to be at this all night aren’t we?
Nope.
Children! Don’t make Willis put you both in the shark pit!
Oh the humanity – part timers screaming and scrabbling, sharks flopping and gasping – is there any way to save them?…..
….
Please note that by normal definition a pit is a hole or deep indentation in a surface. If it is filled with something it becomes a pool. If it is some thin walled structure that contains a liquid or powder then it is a tank – not to be confused with the military hardware consisting of a mobile armored artillery platform.
@ Thrudd, exactly. A pit is not the same thing as a pool or a tank. Just in the same way that a ball is not the same thing as a bubble.
Where in the comic is it claimed that Galasso is particularly smart, or language concerned? Keep in mind, you’re not getting on Willis’ case, you’re getting on Galasso’s case. Character writing = hard work, especially with you have a universe with literally hundreds of characters available to draw from.
HEY, how about you shut up.
GALASSO CARES NOT ABOUT YOUR GRAMMAR! GALASSO DEMANDS ROBERT BE THROWN INTO THE SHARK PIT!
it’s a TANK….if you were to throw me into a pit, that’s just a huge hole. You know, like you’re mom’s?
That should be “your mom’s,” not “you’re mom’s,” unless you’re saying The E-man belongs to your mother, in which case he has presumably fucked your mom. Possibly for a nickel.
RRRRRRRUMBLERUMBLERUMBLERUMBLERUMBLERUMBLE is blue!
What the hell? This wasn’t supposed to be a reply.
1) You are going to be less of a jerk in the future. You will, or you will not be here anymore.
2) You’re chronically bad at correcting: http://www.shortpacked.com/2011/comic/book-13/04-remedial-adulthood/halloween/#comment-55961
Willis for the win and drains it with minimal effort.
I see that Willis is still Master of the Links.
If correcting a (nonexistent) grammar mistake whilst misspelling grammar was not enough, you said “you’re” instead of “your”, “cant” instead of “can’t” and your syntax is terribly lacking some prepositions…
But for further deconstruction…
“Feed them to the shark pit” and variants is correct. When you say that you are having a cup of milk you are talking about the milk, not the cup used to store it. In this case, they are sent to the pit with the purpose of being eaten by the sharks that inhabit it…
A pit can be, in fact, filled with water. We have not seen the rest of the pit to see whether it is a pit or a tank. If the walls are made of glass and it is artificially made then it is indeed a tank, if there is somehow a natural cave(mand-made or not), though unlikely, it is a pit. You can still call it a pit, though, for dramatic purposes.
And what he misuses (though he is not misusing them) is vocabulary/syntax-related, not grammar…
I have fed a troll. Woo?
“When you say that you are having a cup of milk you are talking about the milk, not the cup used to store it.” Unless you’re Discord, of course!
I’m really sorry, I couldn’t help it.
I’m not normally one for jabbing about grammar, but if you’re gonna be all “holier-than-thou” you should take note that your whole rant is a minefield of grammatical failings:
1. You’re missing a comma after “so what” and “by the way”.
2. “It’s” should be “its”.
3. You have an extra quotation mark.
4. “You’re” should be “your”.
I find grammar snobbery to be a sorry case in the first place but if you’re gonna jump down someone’s throat at least do it flawlessly.
In Galasso’s self-defense, he doesn’t really know a whole lot of the world. He didn’t know what a penis what, what gender it belonged to, and how to mate.
Any trap where the floor opens up under you and you fall in is a kind of pit trap. A pit trap filled with spikes is a spiked pit, and a pit trap filled with sharks is a shark pit.
Come on, didn’t you ever play rpg’s?
I’m now pretty sure Galasso has seen It’s A Wonderful Life. Everyone keep him far away from Arsenic and Old Lace, Bringing Up Baby and Harvey. Escpecially Harvey, I don’t want to think what a 6 foot tall invisible rabbit would inspire in this man. Basically, do not allow Galasso anywhere near TCM.
When the hell did he install that?
about two years prior to the 10th anniversary of 3 weeks ago, today.
Next Sunday, A.D.
So Galasso’s going to be shooting Ethan into space then? Will his robot friends all be made of Transformer toys?
Tell me that doesn’t have the makings of BEST THING EVER.
I mean, Galasso sitting there in his castle, trying to take over the world. Upon failure, he falls back on his other sinister plan to take over by finding the worst movie ever.
Mike should puppeteer one of the robots.
Mikebot: I fucked your motherboard
I’d watch that. Hell, I’d love to see Willis do something as a one day gag strip about it. I wonder how the theme song would go…
Oh the horror! I didn’t even get a single word of dialog and Galasso’s ready to toss me to the sharks? Such a cruel Taskmaster! I didn’t even get paid. Hmm, now that I think about it… *I* paid to work there! Oops.
Truly, you want to see this store survive.
Such is the genius of Galasso, that people pay HIM to work there and get one line about cleaning bathrooms.
Not only did the not get eaten, they also have names (I just noticed)
Once in a while, Galasso reminds you why he is an awesome character.
Kind of harsh, but I like the Shark Pit idea.
Considering all the problems he’s had with former seasonal employee Sydney Yus this solution makes sense.
^This makes much sense.
Does that mean sharks have been under Shortpacked this ENTIRE TIME!? Talk about Fridge Horror! O_O
Those aren’t sharks!
THEY’RE WALKYS!!!!!!
Oh, then they’re all safe…. provided they each have a case of 50 nuggets to appease the Walkys…
As long as they’re quick with getting the McNuggets away from their person, and they don’t get any McNugget residue on their hands, they should be fine.
…should we expect a 16 ton weight up in the ceiling, insane fresh fruit assailants, and perhaps a fiery pit below the employee meeting room that Galasso can send his (former) employees into via various buttons which will make the chairs dump them into aforementioned fiery pit?
Also, Galasso looks extremely disappointed he did not get to feed his holiday employees to the shark pit. I know I would be, if I had a shark pit hidden somewhere…
I really would have loved to see the conversation Galasso had with the contractor when they started the rebuilding the store.
How did Gelaso afford sharks? Wouldn’t piranhas be more cost efficent?
Added bonuses is that they are less fussy eaters depending on the variety as well that that taste great fileted, diced and soaked in lime juice with a little onion.
One year, for my birthday, my ex (when we were still married) decided to surprised me with shark steaks for dinner. Unfortunately, it turned out they weren’t fresh, and the ammonia-like smell coming off them made me unable to eat. :’(
Is that why you aren’t married anymore?
He watched that episode of “Penn & Teller Tell a Lie” where they show that piranhas aren’t actually man-eaters.
Tell that to River Monsters
Depends entirely on the feeding schedule. If he doesn’t feed them that often, pirhanas are better, as almost starving them and then suddenly giving them food is how you kick-start the famous feeding frenzy. But if you feed them regularly, just drop some blood and then a whole person and bam. Although shark fins also have the added advantage of visibility, so you can vary a fast and slow drop…
Willis knows about the shark pit! Throw him in the shar-…err the conveniently hidden swimming pool under the toy store that’s totally NOT full of sharks! >.>
So, nobody feels like saying anything about the Iceberg Lounge? Okay.
Batman punches sharks in the face.
There.
…Bat-Shark-Repellant…
…repells bat-sharks only.
I am surprised you avoided the obvious Starscream “ow my foot” joke with the closing of the pit doors
“Faz’s foot is in pain.”
I read that as Faz’s penis is in pain
I prefer my misreading over your foot version
All I can think of reading this is 1. how did he get the permits approved, 2. who the hell did he hire to build this, and 3. where did he get the sharks?
Next time he bitches about Shortpacked!’s financial shortcomings, I don’t want to hear it, because clearly this is the reason for it.
Do those Shark’s have Friggin Laser Beam’s Attached to they’re Heads?
Nope, just normal laser beams, not friggin ones.
so all the stuff that fell in the pit gets marked down as shrink right?
Hahaha, yes.
Mark it as damaged on delivery for accountable expenses!
I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me.
For more shark fun go here: http://www.slagoon.com/
Galasso is always looking for new revenue streams, how about selling the naming rights to the shark pit? My vote goes to Taquitos! Now new and EXTREME!
I wonder if sharks can be considered a tax write off?
No tag for the tadpole?
I wanna wipe that smug smile off Cholma’s face so desperately right now.
I think he should be in every strip, just standing in the background, with that exact expression on his face.
Better yet, have him stare down Ethan’s Roadblock poster. That would be a battle for the ages.
Discount for damaged merchandise. XD
Well that kind of explains why the store was in financial trouble a while back.
I’m working as a seasonal employee for a florist, so I’m getting a kick out of this. At least until after Valentine’s Day, anyway….
Is that when they have you all lined up for the final meeting up against the pockmarked wall out back?
We don’t have a bullet-pocked wall out back.
The bullet-pocked wall is in the parking garage.
“Have you reached a verdict?”
“Yes. They are innocent. FEED THEM TO THE SHARKTICONS!”
one year into the future: NONE OF THEM WANTED TO WORK THERE AGAIN.
i know i wouldn’t xD
I just realized Galasso’s the only one on this page not wearing glasses.
My readers are a seeing-impaired bunch.
I wanted him to feed the sharks!
When did even have that installed.
It’s good to see sometimes that Galasso’s still there… I loved his Ra’s al Ghul-like characteristics. (I wonder what his daughter is doing…)
Having a baby with Amazi-Girl.
Having read a vast majority of the archives, I can surely say at this time that if I introduced someone to the comic, I’d tell them to start here.