I feel he’s been a magnificent bastard. This was just pure Mike, not just ending the relationship, but completely and utterly destroying Amber’s self-worth as a person right at a point when she was at her most vulnerable and expecting something else entirely.
“I feel he’s been a magnificent bastard. This was just pure Willis, not just ending the relationship, but completely and utterly destroying Amber’s self-worth as a person right at a point when she was at her most vulnerable and expecting something else entirely.”
No, the official version has been and always will be “DAMN YOU WILLIS.” With a period. No superfluous exclamation points, and certainly no extraneous letters.
Not to mention that they’ve superimposed the Vader “NOOOOOO” onto Vader throwing the emperor when he’s torturing Luke, for the special edition thingy that’s coming out.
They also made the ewoks blink.
oh, that’s nothing. when lucas converts IV and V into 3D, he’s gonna add more “NOOOOOOOoooooOOOOOOoooo”s to them. one when they show vader hurtling through space in his TIE fighter and one when luke decides he’d rather jump into a bottomless pit rather than live in a word where vader is his father.
That’s probably because that’s what he heard the audience say every time he screened one of his new changes, so he thought they wanted more of them in the movies.
Yeah, I have to agree. One of two things has happened:
Either A: He has cured her of her unhealthy obsession.
or B: If she still wants him, she knows exactly who he is. This is the only way he would want it. Mike has never hurt her properly before and tragedy becomes comedy pretty easily with repetition and distance. His antics became cute to her, no matter how harsh they really were. She never would have understood who he really is if he hadn’t done something like this.
Wait… Which obsession? *confused* And yes, she’ll either break away from him, or realize that this is what it’s going to be and that she’ll either have to retaliate (which she can do, being one of the only ones able) or accept what he did as him trying his hardest.
Worst case scenario (for Mike) she breaks him in return and goes to Jacob.
Worst case scenario (for Amber) she breaks period, having all of her spirit finally broken in one fell swoop.
Best case scenario (for both) she gets her devious revenge and he calls a truce on severity, agreeing to keep it to simple things. I expect that it’s possible it could involve his parents and/or his fear implemented against him. And considering how long she’s been with him, I don’t doubt for a minute she doesn’t know that weakness.
Well, it IS only Thursday. This would have been one hell of a Friday comic; the fact that it isn’t means David has another DAMN YOU WILLIS Generator in the queue that might manage to top this one.
Actually… yeah, he does look kinda sad there. That’s not the usual Mike scowl. It’s almost a look of lamentation?
Maybe he realizes just how seriously fucked this situation is. While it seems like he put forth an honest effort, and was really reaching out here, he knows that, because of who he is and how he’s gone about doing this, he pretty much alienated someone he actually seemed to give a damn about.
Remember: Jason quite astutely pointed out to Amber, when she used to think Mike was only in the relationship because Amber could blackmail him, that Mike only does things because he WANTS to.
Mike WANTED to propose. So he did. But he did it in the only way he could. Which, as we see, has…. unfortunate results.
Or maybe Mike just WANTS to crush Amber emotionally. You can fake puppy dog eyes. You can’t fake a year long plot to get someone’s mom banged by a third party. That’s from the heart.
Actually, I’m forced to agree with Sam on this one… That look when she pulls the hand away looks like ‘worried’/'sad’ (when the brow curves up in the middle as opposed to straight across) pressing into that scowl, and after he gets up, the brow is lower than usual (a depressed low.)
I think it might be his personal failing that he can’t genuinely express anything without sadism of some sort. I mean, he wanted to ask her, and he wanted to suprise her since trying to get her to answer the question without asking wasn’t working. Admittedly, he was probably saving the tape for a different occassion, since he tried to not use it and tried avoiding asking originally.
Either way, I think Sam’s right, Mike does look something besides angry for once, and I find it rather eerie, but at the same time saddening.
I dunno if the expression is faked or not, but Mike knows what he’s doing, and he knows it very well. To steal a quote from Wolverine, Mikes the best at what he does, and what he does isn’t very nice. He knew this would be the one thing that he could be positive would get to Amber, and he did it anyways.
That said, I don’t think it killed things with Amber. I mean, I’d feel a bit ill if I heard audio of my mom having sex, edited or not. And she doesn’t look sad or mad, just shocked/sick. Once she calms down, she’ll remember who she’s dealing with, accept, and we’ll have a horrible terrifying wedding after a few more story arcs.
I was one of those people – something I apologised for the next day – and I’m intrigued by this. Was Mike sincere, trying to scare Amber away for her own good, or engaging (please pardon the pun) in a colossal mind-fuck? Was Mike crossing out the connection always his intention or his response to Amber’s reaction? Was Amber’s reaction a firm “no” or is she simply overwhelmed by everything she’s heard that morning? Will Amber discover the car park full of dead cats, also proposing? How I mine for fish?
Find out tomorrow.
Same Bat-time
Same Bat-channel
(Or maybe not)
P.S. I’m glad the last proposal in Shortpacked! was a lot more obviously successful than this one.
I want to know if Mike actually WAS being sincere in his proposal. Even if he did it in the most asshole way possible, was he sincere? Was he? I lean towards that he wasn’t, especially with how how nonchalantly dusts his pants off and then walks right up to Robin’s chalkboard to cross out his connection with Amber.
i didn’t even realize what he changed on the chalkboard. it’s so full of stuff! i was anticipating seeing what change he was going to make in tomorrow’s strip.
the worst? nah. it’s not like he’s genocidal or anything. i don’t even think he’s evil in slightest. he’s just the biggest asshole. you don’t have to be evil to be an asshole, just inconsiderate.
Robert, I wouldn’t stop just yet… There’s still one more day in this week… Do you really think this was just resolved? There’s one last thing that’s going to happen, and you do NOT want to miss it.
Sooo, here’s the question: he said before that he loved Amber. Was it ALWAYS the long con, or perhaps did he overhear the conversation Amber had with Jacob and agrees with him that she deserves better than him?
I’d lean toward the latter, myself. Mike’s had plenty of opportunities to crush Amber’s spirit before now. And he could have done it back when Amber first realized how out of character her blackmailing him was. Then she would have hated herself. Instead he did it in a way that made her hate him.
It could have been more painful if he had wanted it to be, is what I’m saying.
I was actually considering that too. As much as I dislike their relationship maybe Mike was just trying to, I don’t know, protect her in the long run by momentarily destroying her? Mike seems to know EXACTLY the kind of guy he is and the kind of husband he would be. He shouldn’t be anyone’s husband and there is something seriously disturbing about the fact that Amber would have been willing to stay with him forever. However he has been apparently planning this for a year…
i think he was definately trying to protect her, but not by hurting her. i think he honestly wanted to marry her but knew that he’d always be mike, so he had to try his hardest to make as fucked up a proposal as he could so if she could still say yes afterwards, he’d know she’d be able to take whatever else he could throw at her.
I don’t think he’s been planning it that long, if I had to guess he was hoping to use this for something else. I mean he -did- try to ask her in others ways, this was literally the last of at least 3 shown (and probably many unshown) attempts to get her to say yes without him asking it directly to her. I’m not saying Mike did the right thing, I’m just saying he tried to avoid this specific conclusion to that event. If I had to guess I’d say he was using it for her birthday, like he was hoping to do with the Faz thing.
I don’t think it’s either. I think he genuinely loved her, but had no intention of stopping being himself on her account. So he proposed to her by being as “Mike” as possible – if she couldn’t handle it, then there was no point in staying together, from his perspective.
From Mike’s Bio: “Mike is just an asshole. Claim anything else, and you’re reaching.” I like the theories, but I don’t think they hold water. We’ll see in the days to come though!
YES! YES! YES! Mike is awesome! Mike can NEVER be controlled!
Seriously though, I’m sooo glad about this. Ever since they got together, I suspected Mike was in for a long con. This is just perfect. I don’t think I’ve ever been this emotionally invested in a comic strip, heck, in any work of fiction. David Willis, you are now my favourite artist/author/creator. Congratulations.
And I think Mike was being sincere about this. I don’t think he would go through this entire relationship for the sake of this one moment. I think he did this to make Amber look who he is, so she would break up with him and not end up with her father. Her asking about marriage was pushing the button that it was time to end it.
Yeah, their relationship was founded on unhealthy behavior, better it collapses now than they try to build a life around it. That’s like building a city on swampland.
She needs to get revenge by spilling the beans on Mike’s other job. That was the original deal: He would be his girlfriend and she wouldn’t rat him out.
He would be “her boyfriend.” Or alternatively, she would be his girlfriend or they would date. And I’m guessing you’re forgetting about the strip where she said it was off and he said that he had never cared about that deal and she could tell everyone whenever she wanted to, if she wanted to. Also, he didn’t break up with her here, as fucked up as it was, he proposed. So her revealing his secret because of this would technically be her breaking the deal when he was still keeping it in good faith.
Amber slowly gets over (not over it completely, but better about it) this on her way home. She calls Faz, tells him she’ll give him something of hers if he dyes his hair brown and comes to her apartment. Mike comes home and lays in bed. And wakes up spooning a naked Faz.
Amber, why didn’t you head Jason’s warning back when he warned you about Mike when he made a cameo a while back. How long ago was that? like 2 years? I’m losing all sense of time these days.
No, see, that drawing she did of Amazi-Girl started coming to life and trying to make her lazy. She’s going home to drive a pencil through it before it gains more power.
On a not-obscure-reference note, Mike does look kind of sad in panel three. Same with panel seven, actually–not sad, per say, but kind of soft compared to his usual demeanor. I do think he did kind of hope it’d work out. And him being nonchalant about crossing out the arrow might just be him being a realist about it.
Maybe he’s in on the whole drama-tag thing and is just trying to reduce the couplings before things get out of hand?
Translation:
Mike: I am asking you to marry me, but you have to know who am I, and that I might hurt you. If you aknowledge this, I want to be your husband.
Amber: Let me think about it.
That is exactly what I’m reading about this. Amber doesn’t make spur-of-the-moment decisions. Well, she does, but just as often she’s likely to really think about them. And while she had herself convinced that she would marry Mike, this was a big dose of reality.
I’m guessing it’s not over. Amber’s just taking a step back because she needs to remind herself that she won’t always find Mike’s brand of evil to be “charming.”
Also, yeesh, why are folks happy that Mike “isn’t being controlled” anymore? The relationship hasn’t been blackmail for ages now, and there’s plenty of evidence to suggest that he set it in motion in the first place.
The look on his face, man. He wants her to say yes for his sake and wants her to say no for hers.
I think that’s just Mike misjudging Amber. He doesn’t think she’s coming back, so he’s not going to hope. And if, in the process, he can make his asshole image even better, he’ll do it.
If I follow this, Amber is horrified that Jacob had sex with her by proxy (via her mom) AND that Mike used the sound of that to propose marriage without actually saying it.
About goddamn time. I was wondering when something like this would happen. That relationship needed to end. There was no way there wasn’t all kinds of emotional abuse going on there.
I don’t know if it’s the actual drama or the way it’s conveyed in the comic that I think is brilliant. I’m leaning for the latter. That moment with the chalkboard. Pure amazing.
I’ve come to believe that even if Mike actually ever attempted to do something good, the Universe would be forced to morph it into something evil and assholish.
I think she’ll be going to Jacob’s too. But that will soon be followed by a call to Mike as Amber screams “YESSSSSSS!” on the phone while in Jacob’s bed.
It would be incredibly awful of her to lash out at Jake for something she knows Mike manipulated him into, specifically taking advantage of what Jake has openly stated to be an illness which he struggles to control.
Oh no, it wouldn’t be revenge sex, it would be proposal acceptance sex. It would be her finally turning dark enough to hit Mike back as hard as he did to her. The final step to being the perfect screwed up couple.
To me, that expression says: “If I anyone could be The One, it would be you. But only someone who could take this and give back just as good would actually be The One. Can you ta- …. …. Ah. It looks like you can’t. Well. So much for that.”
…Is it a blush I see on Mike’s cheeks ? Must check on latest pages if it’s only a change of drawing style…
It’s a blush. Or a very recent change. Like, 3 days old change. Must be that, ’cause seriously, Mike, Blushing ? Naaaah…
To be honest, I didn’t expect Amber to react like that. She seemed so well adapted to Mike’s behavior… Congratulations, Mike, you just found her limits. -__-
OR she just have a shock because he really, actually, officially asked for her hand in marriage ? I wish it would be something like that, but the situation seems pretty hopeless. It makes me a bit sad.
Never commented before, but… I went back a bit, and there is a new arrow pointing at Amber, coming from what’s-his-name, or so it seems. Here’s what it looked like before:
Ooopsie, nevermind… I didn’t read the last part of that comic I linked… I thought Mike drew that new arrow just now… *crawls back into the hole she came out of*
Tomorrow’s surprising twist: Amber’s didn’t walk away because Mike horrified her. She walked away because the little Mike in her belly took this beautiful moment between them as an opportunity to kick her in the bladder.
That depends. Sometimes it’s just nausea, sometimes it’s “I’MGONNAPUKERIGHTTHISSECOND!!!” Been through it myself. It varies.
That said, I’m not leaning toward the “she’s pregnant” theory, personally. First, she jerked her hand out of Mike’s, so she’s obviously horrified by what he did. Also, I don’t see her as being careless with the birth control. Of course, if she were on the pill, Mike could have switched them out somehow… he would be the sort to do such a thing…
Although, for a while, I thought Mike was progressing from Amber’s influence, I can’t say I’m surprised… Mike has always been an ass. His character has *always* been an aaaaaaaaaaaaaass.
I honestly have to agree. I don’t think Amber deserves Mike, and I don’t think their relationship is healthy in the least. Maybe Mike is actually trying to do her a favor, in his own twisted way. Or maybe he’s just trying to get himself out of the blackmail she put him under.
I feel really bad for Amber, but at least she isn’t marrying an asshole. And hey, Mike actually looks pretty miserable throughout this strip! That’s nice.
Mike’s gaze, for whatever reason, has softened considerably in panel 3 from the previous page.
He seemed to grow more and more frustrated with her imperviousness to his shock tactics, and with her increasing unwillingness to go as dark as he’s gone. (The way she acted nicer to Faz seemed to trouble him a lot.) So… was this his ultimate plan? To cure her of him?
Or was there some small part of him that hoped she could rise (or sink) to his level once and for all, so he wouldn’t have to go through the rest of his life essentially alone?
Or both?
Meanwhile, Malaya shows evidence of compassion for her fellow human beings for her second consecutive appearance. No one will notice.
Wait… Did mike just take one for the universe? The only times he’s really shown vulnerability was when Walky nearly beat him to death, and with Amber. Did he lessen the drama tangle on purpose? Damnit Mike… or Willis… just GAH!
I know! I might be giving Willis too much credit as an artist, but look at mike’s expressions. Yesterday it’s a look of pain at having to do this, and today it’s a look of pleading remorse.
I’d say that’s always been Mike’s question, from the very beginning of their relationship. And he probably honestly and truly wishes the answer could be yes.
I really didn’t want Mike and Amber to end up together, there’s just something toxic about it. I had actually resolved to stop reading Shortpacked and stick to Dumbing of Age if they ended up together.
Hah… that would still fail. The reason Mike doesn’t like people meeting his parents was because they fight so hard to keep the classic definition of normalcy despite it being plain and clear that Mike is anything but. If his mom banged some sex addict, it’d give Mike the satisfaction of knowing that finally changed.
This storyline is getting better and better, and Friday is coming. What kind of cliffhanger will Mr. Willis have for us then?! This is going to be so epic!
Ok, I’m just gonna quote myself from yesterday’s strip.
Amber, I am disappoint. This is MIKE.
What the hell did you THINK was gonna happen?
You straight up told him that you wanted to date him at his dickish best, and now that he pulls off the ultimate stunt of his very successful trolling career, NOW you flinch?
Also; Mike looks… afraid in panel 3 of what she’ll do. Panel 6 is a sigh of… expectance? And 7 is a definte pissed look.
I don’t think he wanted her to do that, but he knew he had to be true to himself.
I dunno, I think maybe she’s more horrified at the fact that Jacob slept with her mom than the fact that it was MIKE who orchestrated it. But who knows?
ya know… thinking about it, amber might be less sick about the method of proposal and mikes evil, though im sure it contributes, and more from thinking about, and hearing, her mom having sex w/ jake.
i dunno bout you guys but even the thought of my mom having sex with a friend of mine is almost enough to make me vomit.
A: Who does Amber ALWAYS run to when she can’t handle a situation?
B: Who else is having issues with their significant other right now?
C: What was the very first strip in this storyline about?
I believe that Mike has the obsessive Compulsive need to be the dominant Asshole for so long, that he cannot stop himself even if acting this way ends up driving away someone he loves.
That doesn’t really matter, people with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder should and are still held accountable for their own actions.
That would be the reason why he does something, not a sign that it’s okay for him to do it and it wouldn’t make him sympathetic.
It would be sad, but it would still something he needs to get help for; not something should people use to excuse his behavior (which if he had OCD he‘s probably be aware was inappropriate anyway; heck it would probably explain his attitude towards the world).
I tire of seeing people hold Mike to a different standard than everyone else and treat him like he’s good when he’s being slightly less of an asshole than usual.
That being said: Mike with OCD would be speculation, he could just be an asshole…
When I said Mike has a compulsive need to be an asshole, I didn’t excuse his behaviour, afterall, no decent person would devote their life towards being a total prick to everyone from an early age unless they either had one hell of a Freudian Excuse or just a Bad Seed.
The fact that he is a better person when drunk shows that he has chosen to devote his life to be the ultimate asshole, which he has for so long, he cannot/will not quit even if it hurts him.
Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t assume you tried to excuse his behavior. It’s just that people try to use those kinds of things as an excuse for their favorite character.
Sorry if I offended you by making it seem that I thought you thought that way.
Maybe Amber’s more sick at the idea that she forced Mike to make a proposal… like she saw his face from the previous comic, and how much he was obviously trying to make her regret wanting to get engaged to him with his mean proposals. Maybe she’s “sick” over what she thinks she’s forcing Mike to do… Not that I think so, I think they have a very healthy relationship, in their own way.
Cut to tomorrow’s strip of Mike in a bar, trying to drown his sorrows for destroying the only positive thing in his life. Last panel: Amber pouncing on Jacob.
This can’t be the end. Mike reads people incredibly well, and I think he was sincere about proposing and wanting Amber to say yes. His entire life has been dedicated to hurting people in the most painful ways possible (or at least available), but he’d use that power for good if he wanted, which I think he did here.
Do we notice that the people who love Mike and whom Mike (ostensibly) loves seem to end up hurt or dead? Granted I never got the unreleased It’s Walky or Joyce and Walky strips but I noticed it with Dina as well. Mike constantly told her that he didn’t like her, critized her when displaying signs of the opposite feelings (going with her to the museum, checking up on her before she had sex, engineering her break up with Walky). She continued to “love/obcess” over him until her just before her death which Mike seemed uncharacteristically upset about. Maybe he is trying to protect Amber from a similar fate and/or marriage with an asshole (as Mike undoubtably is an asshole and unable or unwilling to change.)? Maybe I’m just trying to rationalize so I can still root for my favorite pairing.
Also (assuming Mike and Amber are truly over). there seems to be a Joss Whedon level of horribly sad break ups recently. All that’s left is Ethan and Drew…
Did Mike actually propose tho? he just got down on one knee and played a recording of her mom having sex with the dude who has a crush on her. The intent was to make it LOOK like a proposal, but I don’t think this counts as that.
no.. that was a proposal. he was looking for the most horrifying way of doing it, but I think it was meant. I wonder if perhaps he was trying to give her true insight into the black void where his soul would normally be. I assume this is why liquor makes him happy, the lack of inhibitions makes him feel free to be a nicer person vs the hard work of fucking everyone’s mom in the ass at all times. can you even imagine how many mothers there are on earth at this moment? the man is a saint to keep up all that fucking.
I loveses it. I’ve never been able to understand any kind of fan-support for this relationship – it came about as the result of blackmail from an emotionally-damaged character, and one-half of it is a character who has been an unrepentant monster for over a decade of comics, whose original character profile back in the day made a point of stipulating that there was no *reason* he was this way, and not to look for any good or rationale in him. I’ve always been very twitchy when strips seems to portray Amber and Mike as being in anything resembling a healthy relationship (the Honey-Bun story springs to mind), but now? To believe that the entire thing was a long con by Mike leading up to this point? Fuck and yes.
Wow; I mean yeah you are right, but wow! Looking away from the idea that this may have been used to give Mike some development so he’s not just a cardboard cutout or a flat character. Ignoring that the possibility that the original profile may or may not still be canon…
The pairing?
It’s because Mike is cute.
Sure the fans might get mad. They might come up with excuses or claim I’m flaming them or say I’m being a jerk or any number of things. They might say I hate Mike even though I like him.
But in the end that is what it comes down to. THEY KNOW that is what it comes down to…
Mike is hot and let’s be honest – Amber! Is! Hot! This is all they needed.
Combine that with fantasy fulfillment (people wishing that once in awhile they could act like Mike) and you’ve got Mike/Amber shippers.
Sure after they started dating people got some nice moments that established them as workable to some extent, but these moments are grossly overshadowed by Mike’s personality and consistent actions. Said fans chose to ignore those factors and rationalize Mike’s behavior – coming up with absurd reasons, blaming others, and so forth.
Even if Mike is developing emotions that resemble normal humans (as in the possibility that he really liked Amber) this is not a sign that he is good!
However I’m shocked that you aren’t aware of the common effect in which people brush away villains and bad peoples evil actions (especially if it’s a good looking villain or bad person) so they can fawn over them. It’s common in fandoms.
This often includes
Demonizing nicer characters (Jacob is bad for questioning Amber‘s judgment. Amber is bad for walking away!)
Using logical fallacy to justify a characters behavior (Mike is honest so it’s okay! Amber is happy so it‘s okay!)
Double standards (Anyone else and it would be bad, but with Mike it’s fine)
Coming up with (misused) mental disorders and neurosis that must be influencing the character and totally justify everything about them.
Bringing up (or just making up) tragic back stories for said character that still wouldn’t justify their actions.
Cherry-picking events well ignoring contrary events.
And much much more!.
A similar thing is ignoring good characters bad traits if you relate to them and demonizing those who point out said bad traits. (Calling Drew abusive for being worried that Ethan‘s collecting is getting out of hand)
I blame Disney, or rather i blame the brothers Grimm first then Disney for prettying it up. we have beauty and the beast to blame for Amberike shippers. we see the horrible monster before us, and we want to believe love can change him. we see the aloof and bookish beauty loving the beast for who he is and cheer. here’s the problem… the prince is a pussy, no-one likes a pussy. I don’t think anyone really wants mike to reform, and unless amber can accept her bestiality fetish that ship is going down faster than a virgin on prom night dosed with Gamma-Hydroxybutyric acid.
The original Grimm fairy tales were not so nice, but you are correct in a sense. They took existing folklore and repackaged it into stories which they published as their own. Disney just took it one step further and dumbed it down more. The original folklore actually was surprisingly close in the main theme of the adaptation in this case, major difference being the beast basically curled up and died before belle got back. Disney would prefer you to be near death or offscreen when you die. I don’t blame Disney for the stories, I blame them for massproducing them and making them pretty.
Actually the Disney version seems to get misremembered (I blame the horrible mid-quel) or the point missed; it actually avoided the originals issues for the most part. Belle only started getting along with the Beast when HE stopped acting like an ass and tried to shape up. Before that Belle acted like someone who desperately tried to escape and hated her situation. (Unless you count the scene where he saved her from the wolves so she brought him back to the castle and tended to his wounds which I don’t see as particularly bad given that Belle leaving someone who just saved her to die would be callous at best sociopath at it’s worse)
But yeah those “love redeems” relationships tend to get glorified (The original was basically Stockholm Syndrome and/or love makes everything GOOD automatically depending on the ending).
Also as for dumbing them down; depends on the story. I’m not really a Disney fan (Although I love Beauty and the Beast and… well that’s it really), but a lot of people are quick to defend the originals because they came first ignoring that they had like millions of different versions and Disney just made one more which isn‘t all the much more stupid than the original – although they do tend to be less dark (I don‘t like the general assumption that dark = smart).
Although some of the original stories are better or more intelligent.
Mike/Amber does seem to be born for the general assumption that “bad boys” are “cool”.
Just a note. The Brothers Grimm made a lot of the tales nicer. Using the phrase grimmification is a malapropism mostly because people generally came across the darker Grimm stories afterward. Most of the stories were actually darker before they published them. The same can probably even be said of Charles Perrault and so on and so forth. But laying blame to anyone is ridiculous on something that is so ingrained in several cultures.
Actually, hun, some of us just like the pairing because in FICTION we like messed up relationships. They’re interesting to read about. I’ve always been a sucker for “evil love”–Xanatos/Fox, Drakken/Shego, that sort of thing, where the folks in the relationship are pretty awful and often to each other, but still stick around. In real life, no, that would suck. But in real life I wouldn’t really want to know most of the SP cast anyway.
Get off your high horse. Not everything is as cut-and-dry as “the squeeing moronic fangirls are distracted by hotness!”
You see, I don’t care if they’re ship sinks or meets. I can see their relationship working because…
AMBER IS A JERKASS.
Not 100% by any means, of course. But a good amount of the time, she is far more caustic and petty then she ever realizes. In her mind she’s a victim, but she’s really quite a bully most of the time.
Let’s remember that Mike confessed his love for Amber after she punched him, knocking him on his ass and cut his lip.
It would work if Amber wants a relationship that is intentionally abusive.
Sorry guys, but that’s a double-ended arrow Mike’s crossed out. Look at the first strip the chalkboard was in. He’s not crossing out just Amber’s attraction to him, or just his to her, he’s crossing out the relationship.
oh the humanity! the Amberike is sinking but the shippers refuse to stop playing their tiny violins… the cynical bastards over on the newly christined Leslaya continue to laugh and party as if there is not a care in the world! the iceberg is coming people! willis spares noone!
I’m sure someone has noticed this before, but Mike’s had pink spots on his cheeks ever since like, 2 or 3 posts ago. And he’s not drunk. That we can see. He may actually be sincere about this…
You know, even though I’ve started to like Amber again, and I do feel some sympathy for her (which would have been impossible a couple months ago), I still feel she had this coming. I mean, she blackmailed Mike of all people, basically the equivalent of playing with matches in a gas station. So I’m not the least bit surprised that it blew up in her face. I am surprised Mike took this long to exact his vengeance, but obviously he knew the right time to act. And even if Mike did have genuine feelings for Amber, there’s still no way he could let the blackmail go unpunished. It’s just not how he works.
But Ethan’s going to have a heck of time putting her back together after this. But that’s what a best friend’s for.
I don’t think everyone understands how Mike works (possibly including Mike).
Judging by his past behavior, Mike wants to physiologically torture Amber, then take it as Amber beats the living stuffing out of him, and then they get mushy.
If my take on this is correct, it would help if Mike just came out and explained the f$#@ed up way he likes it, but I suspect he’s one of those idiots who thinks his ‘true wuv’ will just know. I suspect he thought of Amber as this type of person. Like most people, he has an immature expectation that a good partner will read his mind.
Of course, Amber might accept all of this. It depends if she either wants to try to change him, break up, or accept him. It’s all in her court.
I actually think she is going to get it and accept him. She’s a bit of a jerk-ass herself, and I could see her coming to love pounding Mike to keep him in line.
I don’t get why Mike did this. I mean, the obvious answer is “It’s Mike, this is what he does” but… He said in an earlier strip that he loved Amber, and she obviously something that makes him happy, even if he doesn’t show it. So why would he hurt her in such a terrible way? Is his own happiness worth a horrible prank that will only make his life worse? Mike’s relationship with Amber despite his apparent horribleness was giving him real depth, but with this, he’s starting to look like a more shallow character. He’s always been my favourite, but this just seems even more awful than his usual behaviour.
@HarrietRants: “I don’t get why Mike did this. I mean, the obvious answer is “It’s Mike, this is what he does” but… He said in an earlier strip that he loved Amber…”
He admitted this after she punched him hard enough to knock him on his ass and make him bleed. She did this after he heckled her into a rage. He loves to psychologically torture people. I’d bet money he likes being punched. Mike loves abusing and getting abuse. His definition of love is probably not yours. (This is a good thing.)
Mike liked it that Amber blackmailed him into dating her. He liked she razed him by dropping the ‘M’ word out of no wear. Mike is not nice and loves what is not nice about Amber.
@HarrietRants:”Mike’s relationship with Amber despite his apparent horribleness was giving him real depth, but with this, he’s starting to look like a more shallow character. He’s always been my favourite, but this just seems even more awful than his usual behaviour.”
I never assumed Mike was better than he’s been set out to be, and I certainly don’t have a case of Draco in Leather Pants. I just thought that when Mike said he loved Amber, he actually meant it.
I think he does mean it. I just don’t think he shares your sense of what love is, or how to show it. This is probably how Mike shows his deep, deep love. It’s scary. Mike’s a scary guy.
He’s really not the guy for Amber unless she decides she wants to be as abusive as him.
You know what’s sad. I didn’t know he proposed until people started saying it today and I had to go back and read it. At first I was like “Who the hell makes those sex noises?” Shame shame.
Lol! It’s way too early to write this relationship off as dead.
Remember that Amber’s role-model for a husband will be her dad. Mike at his worst might still be better then her father. And yes, I have been paying attention to Mike at his worst.
I’ll place a bet that she’ll come back, beat him down, and then go off to celebrate.
This is karmic punishment for Amber mocking the power of the Drama Tag.
Prediction for tomorrow’s strip:
Mike walks out the door to go home for the night and finds a parking lot full of dead cats spelling out the word “YES”.
Now to be serious for a moment: I’m not sure who I feel worse for – Amber or Mike.
Just curiosity… Mike managed to break up with Amber in just exactly the way that would prevent her from getting together with Jacob, right after Amber and Jacob finally admitted their mutual attraction to each other. Is this just typical Mike being as asshole to them both or is Mike actually jealous?
I’m confused, lots of visual symbolism, the patting down & using the chalkboard. With Mike’s non-emotive face and from his declaration of love earlier I’m not sure if he wants to hurt Amber or is in love with her. Too much ambiguity,
After all this time with Mike, I’d have thought Amber would have said “Pfft, Yer gonna have to do better than that. Get working on those cats.” and went back to work.
I’m confused by everyone’s reaction to this. Isn’t this how a guy normally goes about breaking up with a crazy chick that originally blackmailed him into a relationship and then expected a marriage proposal? It’s how I usually do it and I make it as public as possible. Because, you know, I’m constantly being blackmailed into relationships with head cases.
Why are the love heptagon and nonagon missing in the graph? Also, how on earth can the blackboard still say “pentagon” after all this time? It has to be months since Robin found out emotional relations in Shortpacked! are more complicated.
And poor Amber… (almost) like it is written in the book: “Ah, distinctly I remember, it was in the bleak December and each seperate dying Amber wrought its ghost upon the floor.” :’(
Thinking about it today, I find it interesting how vocal people are about Mike and Amber.
I never liked or disliked them. They’re fictional, if it’s a little unrealistic, that’s okay long as it made for an entertaining story. Fiction means it can be unreal. I don’t know if I can understand.
I…..I honestly don’t know if I want to keep reading this comic. The two reasons I read it are gone now. And my faith in Willis is almost gone. I’m so broken hearted. Why does he have to ruin everything?
I think Willis has a tendency to eventually bring things around to a happy ending, he just does it over a very long period of time. I’m pretty much 100% positive at this point that we’ll be back to Robin+Leslie after a while. Maybe a year or two, though.
Because it’s his? Not that I agree with you that he’s ruining it. Because I don’t. At all. But considering the fact that Shortpacked came from his imagination he has every right to take it where he feels it needs to go. Because it’s his thing. He owns it.
He keeps you guessing, he brings people together which seem to be interesting pairings, has said pairings pay off for a bit, then chips at the foundation so we can watch the building crumble. He is a cruel cruel god. By next year Robin will be in an epic hatefuck relationship with Sydney, Amber will be with Jacob, Mike will be with Faz, and Ethan will be with Reagon. Why? because he is Willis, and he will write it so well you will cheer for them.
Thank you, I hate Twilight. But keep the assumptions going.
Also, some of us happen to think the relationship was not as abusive as you think. Amber didn’t find it abusive. And frankly, as long as the person is happy, there isn’t a problem. If she’s no longer happy, than there is. But as it’s most likely over, the problem is moot.
Start off with a comic that makes the commenters think that Ethan and Drew are headed to Splitsville… leading up to this.
And yes, I do realize that this is my 3rd comment on this strip, shut up. >_> It broke my brain badly enough that it took me this long to put everything together.
Oh thank goodness, finally!
It might be kind of stupid, but I always hated them together. I love Mike as a character and Amber is pretty cool, too, but the way she tricked him into that relationship was just… meh. I guess I like him when he’s cool and an asshole and Amber kind of made him soft.
*crosses fingers and hopes they won’t get back together* =)
Here’s my thing though. If Mike is JUST an asshole, then he doesn’t make any real sense as a long term character. He has to have an underlying interest in the well being of others in at least a general sense. He didn’t need to fight as hard for SEMME as he did, he didn’t need to push Joyce out of the way as effectively as he did to get the crack in he was making, and there was no asshole reason to fight the Honeybun in Manhattan, or, more importantly, save Amber from falling to her death. Who could seriously argue that that was in his self interest? If he doesn’t have some underlying interest in other people, and Amber, then I don’t get him at all.
Mike is everything you don’t want him to be, those things include deep nuanced compelling and interesting. Noone wants the guy who makes doing your mom jokes to be anything more than a one note asshat. Mike laughs at your perceptions. He had a damn good reason for doing your mom, you won’t find out until much later why. It will shock and amaze you when you find out. You will thank him, but wonder if he was just being an asshole at the same time.
Panel 6: Mike looks happy with himself.
Panel 7: This panel needs to be read from right to left. Mike’s entire expression in response to the shock is simply, an unquestioningly…
“What.”
As if to say, “You were expecting maybe Edward Cullen?”
Mike actually looks unhappy in that third panel. I wonder if a part of him regrets this. As for Amber… I’m a bit disappointed. I can’t say this couldn’t happen, but I really did expect her to be ready for something like this. After all, its Mike.
Although I have to wonder if Amber will accept this as a break-up. After all, she just left. She never said it was over with them.
I have two sides to this.
My male side: Great Job Mike. You just got a pushy girl off your back. Now all you need to do is make sure that this doesn’t lead to any big problems. XD
My female side(since I am a girl): WTH MIKE! I know Amber was…well annoying, but that took is a little to far. You know that Amber is suppose to be the one to push forward with her feelings, and when she took it to far you decided to break off literally the whole thing…unless it means that Mike likes her back, but wants her to go at his pace. Either way we’ll find out what happens in a little.
In all this is just one huge mind fudge! >.<
I love Mike for the same reason I love the Joker – they’re both insane and evil and make life miserable for other characters I like. I’m the kind of person who enjoys platonic hurt/comfort fic because seeing my favorites in pain and working it out makes me all happy inside.
That said, I can’t decide whether I love this or hate this. It is a true tribute to Mike’s ability to make life miserable… but I can’t help but think it is also making HIM miserable at the same time.
I just want people to be happy. But this is fiction, and conflict is the root of all fiction. Just as long as it eventually settles onto a happy note, please? A little angst and drama is all well and good for a little while, but then I get depressed.
See, while everyone else was either noticing or not noticing the “drunk Mike” tag, I decided to click on the “chalkboard” tag. And that was when I noticed what Mike was really doing there: Scratching out the arrow connecting himself and Amber.
And leaving in the arrow connecting Jacob and Amber, which Mike himself drew last October.
So Mike has figured out that, in the long run, Amber would be happier with Jacob (who, sex-addiction aside, seems like a nice guy) than she would be with him. Plus, it seems that Jacob is an obsessive collector like Ethan. Who Amber kinda wanted to be with before he came out.
So Mike figures that Jacob, being basically a hetero version of Ethan, is the best fit for Amber.
But sober Mike can’t break up with her, because his asshole-ness is too deeply engrained to let him do something genuinely good. The only way he can do what’s best for Amber is by doing it while drunk, because Drunk Mike is a nice guy.
And since he really does love her, drunk or sober, we kinda have Sober Mike and Drunk Mike working together to do what’s best for Amber.
I think I lucked out when my real life got in the way of my web comic habit just long enough to miss this arc, go back and read it quickly just to catch up and get my WTF moment, and then go back again when I really had time so I could thoroughly enjoy this without having to wait until tomorrow.
DAMN YOU WILLIS
No! We Need to be more emphatic!
DDDAAAMMMNNN YYYOOOUUU WWWIIILLLLLLIIISSS!!!
I feel he’s been a magnificent bastard. This was just pure Mike, not just ending the relationship, but completely and utterly destroying Amber’s self-worth as a person right at a point when she was at her most vulnerable and expecting something else entirely.
“I feel he’s been a magnificent bastard. This was just pure Willis, not just ending the relationship, but completely and utterly destroying Amber’s self-worth as a person right at a point when she was at her most vulnerable and expecting something else entirely.”
fixed it for ya.
Will this result in Amber’s self-esteem crashing back to the level she was when SP! started?
Maybe she will change her look again.
No, the official version has been and always will be “DAMN YOU WILLIS.” With a period. No superfluous exclamation points, and certainly no extraneous letters.
As Vader would say “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”
Now I feel worse for Amber, but I still feel bad for Jacob too.
I thought it was Luke who said “NOOOOOOOOOOO!”
Both, but Vader’s at the end of episode 3 is more memetic.
Not to mention that they’ve superimposed the Vader “NOOOOOO” onto Vader throwing the emperor when he’s torturing Luke, for the special edition thingy that’s coming out.
They also made the ewoks blink.
NEVER. MENTION. THIS. AGAIN.
oh, that’s nothing. when lucas converts IV and V into 3D, he’s gonna add more “NOOOOOOOoooooOOOOOOoooo”s to them. one when they show vader hurtling through space in his TIE fighter and one when luke decides he’d rather jump into a bottomless pit rather than live in a word where vader is his father.
/inside source
That’s probably because that’s what he heard the audience say every time he screened one of his new changes, so he thought they wanted more of them in the movies.
Bleh.
Something tells me I’m the only person who thinks that’s a great idea.
And also more retarded.
I SECOND THIS.
Also, Avvi+Comment=AMAZING.
DAMN YOU, WILLISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
That Mike. Always defacing Robin’s chalkboard.
The question now is…is he right?
OOH OOH WHAT IF…
…guess I’ll see in about five minutes here D=
I hope she’s Preggers, Mike would make a wonderful father.
“I did your mother for a nickel”
See? Teaching lil Mike Jr. about numbers and money early on.
he will grow up to be an accountant.
An accountant of women.
Actually he’s about to draw Amber’s mom (or Amber since he could presume she’d end up falling to him) and Jacob on the board to Robin’s horror.
Well… shit.
what a perfectly placed gravatar
I’m…actually really liking where this is going.
Yeah, I have to agree. One of two things has happened:
Either A: He has cured her of her unhealthy obsession.
or B: If she still wants him, she knows exactly who he is. This is the only way he would want it. Mike has never hurt her properly before and tragedy becomes comedy pretty easily with repetition and distance. His antics became cute to her, no matter how harsh they really were. She never would have understood who he really is if he hadn’t done something like this.
That being said: Damn you Willis!
I love you for saying this. You hit the nail on the head!
Indeed, well done.
Wait… Which obsession? *confused* And yes, she’ll either break away from him, or realize that this is what it’s going to be and that she’ll either have to retaliate (which she can do, being one of the only ones able) or accept what he did as him trying his hardest.
Worst case scenario (for Mike) she breaks him in return and goes to Jacob.
Worst case scenario (for Amber) she breaks period, having all of her spirit finally broken in one fell swoop.
Best case scenario (for both) she gets her devious revenge and he calls a truce on severity, agreeing to keep it to simple things. I expect that it’s possible it could involve his parents and/or his fear implemented against him. And considering how long she’s been with him, I don’t doubt for a minute she doesn’t know that weakness.
Mike? Call a truce?
….
seriously?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
although, i’m somehow still hopeful. almost optimistic, but that might be going a little far
Well, it IS only Thursday. This would have been one hell of a Friday comic; the fact that it isn’t means David has another DAMN YOU WILLIS Generator in the queue that might manage to top this one.
I didn’t think she would be able to handle that. Maybe Amber is remembering who the hell Mike is.
Well damn.
Well this is going to be interesting
And we have our answer. Love Robin’s horrified face in the second-to-last panel.
actually, after yesterday, i can’t look at robin (when she’s not talking) and not think that she was included afterward…
the fiend
she was never there, man! and han shot first!
What the hell was she expecting?
Why the hell am I talking about her as if she’s a real person?
she is real. in your heart.
Oh, God.
Mike looks…
…sad. :C
…it’s extremely distressing.
MIKE looks sad?
Check out panel 2. Look at his eyes. He’s got that puppy dog look. It’s disturbing to see Mike like that.
Actually… yeah, he does look kinda sad there. That’s not the usual Mike scowl. It’s almost a look of lamentation?
Maybe he realizes just how seriously fucked this situation is. While it seems like he put forth an honest effort, and was really reaching out here, he knows that, because of who he is and how he’s gone about doing this, he pretty much alienated someone he actually seemed to give a damn about.
Remember: Jason quite astutely pointed out to Amber, when she used to think Mike was only in the relationship because Amber could blackmail him, that Mike only does things because he WANTS to.
Mike WANTED to propose. So he did. But he did it in the only way he could. Which, as we see, has…. unfortunate results.
Or maybe Mike just WANTS to crush Amber emotionally. You can fake puppy dog eyes. You can’t fake a year long plot to get someone’s mom banged by a third party. That’s from the heart.
Actually, I’m forced to agree with Sam on this one… That look when she pulls the hand away looks like ‘worried’/'sad’ (when the brow curves up in the middle as opposed to straight across) pressing into that scowl, and after he gets up, the brow is lower than usual (a depressed low.)
I think it might be his personal failing that he can’t genuinely express anything without sadism of some sort. I mean, he wanted to ask her, and he wanted to suprise her since trying to get her to answer the question without asking wasn’t working. Admittedly, he was probably saving the tape for a different occassion, since he tried to not use it and tried avoiding asking originally.
Either way, I think Sam’s right, Mike does look something besides angry for once, and I find it rather eerie, but at the same time saddening.
I dunno if the expression is faked or not, but Mike knows what he’s doing, and he knows it very well. To steal a quote from Wolverine, Mikes the best at what he does, and what he does isn’t very nice. He knew this would be the one thing that he could be positive would get to Amber, and he did it anyways.
That said, I don’t think it killed things with Amber. I mean, I’d feel a bit ill if I heard audio of my mom having sex, edited or not. And she doesn’t look sad or mad, just shocked/sick. Once she calms down, she’ll remember who she’s dealing with, accept, and we’ll have a horrible terrifying wedding after a few more story arcs.
Honestly didn’t see that coming. Though I feel I’m in the minority because I think this is more interesting than Amber just saying yes.
I agree, it’s more interesting this way. I wonder how Amber’s going to cope with this.
So, um, hey. To the people who a few months back were like, “Hey, can bad stuff happen to Amber? Her having nice things is annoying me”.
Thanks a lot and fuck you.
Agreed. This was clearly in the works for a long time. Wouldn’t have been half as effective if we didn’t have to wait.
Are you kidding? I love this!
I also flat out admitted back then I’m not happy unless everyone is miserable.
Wow. The sheer pessimism here.
Someone needs to go the cave of gumdrops and ice cream.
You mean Candy Mountain?
Yeah, that always ends well.
Do you get there in a windowless van by chance?
Actually, no, I was making a reference to Dragonball Z Abridged.
but the gumdrops and ice cream was a lie… like the cake
The cake is real. Or at least it was until Hibiki ate it.
Valid references that nobody will understand are often effective ways of killing meme feedback loops.
/signed
I was one of those people – something I apologised for the next day – and I’m intrigued by this. Was Mike sincere, trying to scare Amber away for her own good, or engaging (please pardon the pun) in a colossal mind-fuck? Was Mike crossing out the connection always his intention or his response to Amber’s reaction? Was Amber’s reaction a firm “no” or is she simply overwhelmed by everything she’s heard that morning? Will Amber discover the car park full of dead cats, also proposing? How I mine for fish?
Find out tomorrow.
Same Bat-time
Same Bat-channel
(Or maybe not)
P.S. I’m glad the last proposal in Shortpacked! was a lot more obviously successful than this one.
Now see.
I want to know if Mike actually WAS being sincere in his proposal. Even if he did it in the most asshole way possible, was he sincere? Was he? I lean towards that he wasn’t, especially with how how nonchalantly dusts his pants off and then walks right up to Robin’s chalkboard to cross out his connection with Amber.
Mike, never, ever stop being you.
considering he only crossed out her arrow towards him, and not the other arrow, i’d say he was pretty sincere
He crossed out the two-way arrow between them. The one above it is Ethan –> Mike.
why is everyone still referring to it as a “proposal”? did mike ever say the words “will you marry me?” no. all he did was crush amber’s soul.
the recording from the previous strip said “amber, will you marry me”.
i didn’t even realize what he changed on the chalkboard. it’s so full of stuff! i was anticipating seeing what change he was going to make in tomorrow’s strip.
NO. OH GOD NO. Must. Hold on to hope. -twitchsob-
Well of course she’s sick, I’d be too if the Trix Yogurt commercial was playing in the background.
Congrats, you just got the first laugh out of me in relation to today’s strip.
PLEASE HAVE ALL THE INTERNETS
Seconded.
All of em. Every single one. And the cookies too.
This is my favorite comment on this page.*
*thus far
Reread as:
“I’m Commander Shephard, and this is my favorite comment on the Citadel.”
Even more lolz.
Great, now I’m nauseated and laughing.
CAAAAALLEEEEED IIIIIIIIIT!!
Good. She finally is coming to her senses about the man she was actually thinking of marrying. Mike is the worst.
No Mike is the best. At being the worst.
Mike is awesome, but anyone who marries him is insane.
Whats wrong with being insane? It makes the world more interesting!
the worst? nah. it’s not like he’s genocidal or anything. i don’t even think he’s evil in slightest. he’s just the biggest asshole. you don’t have to be evil to be an asshole, just inconsiderate.
But can she love a man who won’t punch her?
What ever happened to the multi-touch screen that Faz had?
Would you really want to touch something that belonged to Faz?
Especially as he’s her brother. Everyone knows brothers have cooties.
I am so in love with this series. Thank you.
Awesome. Now Kiss Robin Mike just because it will somehow make Leslie jealous and fix everything.
You *SERIOUSLY* want Mike to get himself involved in the Robin/Leslie thing??
this weeks storyline has finally left a bad taste in my mouth. I think I should stop reading for the time being.
Robert, I wouldn’t stop just yet… There’s still one more day in this week… Do you really think this was just resolved? There’s one last thing that’s going to happen, and you do NOT want to miss it.
Except that tomorrow’s strip will probably be a cliffhanger, forcing you to see what happens Monday, creating an endless cycle of webcomic addiction!
I’m with you Robert.
Sooo, here’s the question: he said before that he loved Amber. Was it ALWAYS the long con, or perhaps did he overhear the conversation Amber had with Jacob and agrees with him that she deserves better than him?
I’d lean toward the latter, myself. Mike’s had plenty of opportunities to crush Amber’s spirit before now. And he could have done it back when Amber first realized how out of character her blackmailing him was. Then she would have hated herself. Instead he did it in a way that made her hate him.
It could have been more painful if he had wanted it to be, is what I’m saying.
I was actually considering that too. As much as I dislike their relationship maybe Mike was just trying to, I don’t know, protect her in the long run by momentarily destroying her? Mike seems to know EXACTLY the kind of guy he is and the kind of husband he would be. He shouldn’t be anyone’s husband and there is something seriously disturbing about the fact that Amber would have been willing to stay with him forever. However he has been apparently planning this for a year…
i think he was definately trying to protect her, but not by hurting her. i think he honestly wanted to marry her but knew that he’d always be mike, so he had to try his hardest to make as fucked up a proposal as he could so if she could still say yes afterwards, he’d know she’d be able to take whatever else he could throw at her.
I don’t think he’s been planning it that long, if I had to guess he was hoping to use this for something else. I mean he -did- try to ask her in others ways, this was literally the last of at least 3 shown (and probably many unshown) attempts to get her to say yes without him asking it directly to her. I’m not saying Mike did the right thing, I’m just saying he tried to avoid this specific conclusion to that event. If I had to guess I’d say he was using it for her birthday, like he was hoping to do with the Faz thing.
I don’t think it’s either. I think he genuinely loved her, but had no intention of stopping being himself on her account. So he proposed to her by being as “Mike” as possible – if she couldn’t handle it, then there was no point in staying together, from his perspective.
From Mike’s Bio: “Mike is just an asshole. Claim anything else, and you’re reaching.” I like the theories, but I don’t think they hold water. We’ll see in the days to come though!
I think he meant he loved her he’s just a sick disturbed human being. An Awesome sick disturbed human being but sick and disturbed all the same.
Concerning Marriage Proposals:
Based on my experience (and now Mike’s experience), the following are NOT IDEAL RESPONSES to “Will you marry me.”
“I feel sick.”
“AUUUUUUUUUUGH!”
“Not if you were the last man on earth.”
“THAT WASN’T LITERAL! STOP KILLING ALL THE MEN!”
“Oh yeah, um, I totally would, but… look at the time! I left the oven on!”
“No, but I’ll marry your mom.”
“FAAAAACE!”
“But if I married you, then we couldn’t have premarital hanky-panky anymore.”
“Yes, but only if you can survive this poison.”
“Habbo floogo witzin?”
“I have just died inside, so sure, yeah.”
“Sure. Let’s set the date for after doomsday.”
“But if I married you, then we couldn’t have premarital hanky-panky anymore.”
Actually, as far as rejections go, that’s a pretty good one. I mean, at least you’re still getting some.
Wow…at first I was thought it was Robin who crossed out the line between Amber and Mike but now that I realize it was Mike…damn I don’t know.
YES! YES! YES! Mike is awesome! Mike can NEVER be controlled!
Seriously though, I’m sooo glad about this. Ever since they got together, I suspected Mike was in for a long con. This is just perfect. I don’t think I’ve ever been this emotionally invested in a comic strip, heck, in any work of fiction. David Willis, you are now my favourite artist/author/creator. Congratulations.
I think there was more to this relationship than just a con, fellow Shortpacked!er.
Careful there Red Mage, one might think you are breaking a dimensional wall of some kind… or smudging numbers….
Isn’t that the best way to do it?
Yeah, I honestly don’t think this was a con on Mike’s part. I think he actually wanted her to say yes, as strange as that sounds.
Hoped she’d say yes but wasn’t holding out for it, I’m sure. Mike’s an asshole but also a realist.
Mike is as cruel to himself as he is to everyone else.
“Mike is as cruel to himself as he is to everyone else.”
^ THIS ^
I want to say that I called it, but Mike’s face in the third panel makes me wonder if he actually wanted her to say yes.
Jesus fuck, its about time, it was never going to work out between those two.
Thank you Willis
Honestly, I’m not sure this is over.
And I think Mike was being sincere about this. I don’t think he would go through this entire relationship for the sake of this one moment. I think he did this to make Amber look who he is, so she would break up with him and not end up with her father. Her asking about marriage was pushing the button that it was time to end it.
Of course, that’s probably just me being naive.
You know, I can’t help but wonder…
and I apologize in advance if this question has already been posed, but…
Does Mike’s efforts to be an asshole to everyone …include himself?
More than likely.
Yeah, their relationship was founded on unhealthy behavior, better it collapses now than they try to build a life around it. That’s like building a city on swampland.
New Orleans?
About fucking time that sham ended.
Waiting for the next strip is already driving me insane.
Oh, didn’t you read the notice about Willis taking a break from drawing this strip until next year?
You Hoopy Frood! I love your screenname, hope you know where your towel is!
She needs to get revenge by spilling the beans on Mike’s other job. That was the original deal: He would be his girlfriend and she wouldn’t rat him out.
He would be “her boyfriend.” Or alternatively, she would be his girlfriend or they would date. And I’m guessing you’re forgetting about the strip where she said it was off and he said that he had never cared about that deal and she could tell everyone whenever she wanted to, if she wanted to. Also, he didn’t break up with her here, as fucked up as it was, he proposed. So her revealing his secret because of this would technically be her breaking the deal when he was still keeping it in good faith.
Amber slowly gets over (not over it completely, but better about it) this on her way home. She calls Faz, tells him she’ll give him something of hers if he dyes his hair brown and comes to her apartment. Mike comes home and lays in bed. And wakes up spooning a naked Faz.
Amber’s revenge.
Amber, why didn’t you head Jason’s warning back when he warned you about Mike when he made a cameo a while back. How long ago was that? like 2 years? I’m losing all sense of time these days.
I don’t recall Jason warning her so much as saying that Mike only does things Mike wants to.
I think he said Mike only does things that he wants to do… but not always for the reasons you’d expect. Pretty ominous…
Ahh yes… the fine print.
Commenting twice due to the many emotions exploding in me at once. I actually feel sick. This calls for both a ‘Well played’ and a ‘Damn you’ Willis.
Urgh. I can’t believe this is happening.
This exactly.
Beautiful plot that makes me want to punch someone.
Willis has succeeded as a storyteller, whatever happens.
Damn well played, you Willis?
No, see, that drawing she did of Amazi-Girl started coming to life and trying to make her lazy. She’s going home to drive a pencil through it before it gains more power.
On a not-obscure-reference note, Mike does look kind of sad in panel three. Same with panel seven, actually–not sad, per say, but kind of soft compared to his usual demeanor. I do think he did kind of hope it’d work out. And him being nonchalant about crossing out the arrow might just be him being a realist about it.
Maybe he’s in on the whole drama-tag thing and is just trying to reduce the couplings before things get out of hand?
Hah! “I Feel Sick!” reference! I thought only I read that!
I definitely think that Mike did this just to get Amber to hate him. And sadly, it seems to have worked.
WHY WILLIS WHY!
(Because that’s how you roll. And we sadly love you for it!)
It’s not Friday yet, folks. We don’t know what cliffhangers are in store for the next strip…
F*ckin’ drama tag, amirite?
Mike almost looks…pleading. Like he’s saying “please” with his eyes.
Well, if you cover up the bottom half of his face, he looks that way.
On second thought, cover it up FOREVER.
Translation:
Mike: I am asking you to marry me, but you have to know who am I, and that I might hurt you. If you aknowledge this, I want to be your husband.
Amber: Let me think about it.
That is exactly what I’m reading about this. Amber doesn’t make spur-of-the-moment decisions. Well, she does, but just as often she’s likely to really think about them. And while she had herself convinced that she would marry Mike, this was a big dose of reality.
I’m guessing it’s not over. Amber’s just taking a step back because she needs to remind herself that she won’t always find Mike’s brand of evil to be “charming.”
Also, yeesh, why are folks happy that Mike “isn’t being controlled” anymore? The relationship hasn’t been blackmail for ages now, and there’s plenty of evidence to suggest that he set it in motion in the first place.
The look on his face, man. He wants her to say yes for his sake and wants her to say no for hers.
wait this is almost exactly how i read it too! i’m hoping that you’re spot on with this one, because then its ok that i still think there’s a chance
Thirded.
I am seeing like that too…
I’d agree with you if Mike didn’t cross off the arrow between him and Amber. That makes it final in my mind.
I think that’s just Mike misjudging Amber. He doesn’t think she’s coming back, so he’s not going to hope. And if, in the process, he can make his asshole image even better, he’ll do it.
My bet: he is NOT crossing the line.
Hey, wait a second. There’s a Ninja Rick tag on this strip, but I don’t see him in it anywhere.
HE’S AMAZING!!!!
That is awesome.
Wait, where the hell is Meredith in this strip?
meredith (and nathan) are on the chalkboard in the second to last panel. they are crossed out above the word “pentagon”.
and on a side note, i’ve noticed in the chalkboard’s debut strip it sad “pentagram”!
Second to last, you see the top of his head drawn on the chalkboard.
I think that’s the top of his head on the chalkboard at the bottom of panel 7.
There should be a Ninja Rick tag on every single comic.
it would make me sick to hear one of my parents getting it on too
If I follow this, Amber is horrified that Jacob had sex with her by proxy (via her mom) AND that Mike used the sound of that to propose marriage without actually saying it.
Well, wouldn’t you be if this happened to you?
About goddamn time. I was wondering when something like this would happen. That relationship needed to end. There was no way there wasn’t all kinds of emotional abuse going on there.
The only thing worse for Amber now is to find her hamsters dead.
Don’t give him ideas.
Mike doesn’t need my help in that department.
Exactly. He can come up with stuff on his own. Don’t give him extra fodder.
I don’t know if it’s the actual drama or the way it’s conveyed in the comic that I think is brilliant. I’m leaning for the latter. That moment with the chalkboard. Pure amazing.
I’ve come to believe that even if Mike actually ever attempted to do something good, the Universe would be forced to morph it into something evil and assholish.
Wow… Mike just… wow…
Mike just made his escape from Amber. He’s finally shattered it, and he knows it.
I think she’s going to end up at Jacob’s.
I think she’ll be going to Jacob’s too. But that will soon be followed by a call to Mike as Amber screams “YESSSSSSS!” on the phone while in Jacob’s bed.
I wouldn’t put it at revenge sex.
If Amber IS going to Jacob’s it would be to punch him for telling her that mike isn’t good for her while hiding the fact that he fucked her mom
It would be incredibly awful of her to lash out at Jake for something she knows Mike manipulated him into, specifically taking advantage of what Jake has openly stated to be an illness which he struggles to control.
She’s also got no right. Her mom and Jacob are both consenting adults and under no obligation to tell her anything about their sex lives.
Just because she’s got no right doesn’t mean she wouldn’t do it.
Oh no, it wouldn’t be revenge sex, it would be proposal acceptance sex. It would be her finally turning dark enough to hit Mike back as hard as he did to her. The final step to being the perfect screwed up couple.
LOL. That’ll be the PERFECT way for her to accept his proposal.
-airfox
Not a chance. Not after Jacob fucked Amber’s mom.
Well, she didn’t say no…? Exactly…?
In any case, this’ll throw an interesting spin on things. I really can’t wait to see how this turns out in the long run.
To me, that expression says: “If I anyone could be The One, it would be you. But only someone who could take this and give back just as good would actually be The One. Can you ta- …. …. Ah. It looks like you can’t. Well. So much for that.”
I have no idea where this is going!
To be honest, I kind of love it.
(Though, um, I really did enjoy MikeXAmber, very very much so. I think my little shipper heart died a little.)
…Is it a blush I see on Mike’s cheeks ? Must check on latest pages if it’s only a change of drawing style…
It’s a blush. Or a very recent change. Like, 3 days old change. Must be that, ’cause seriously, Mike, Blushing ? Naaaah…
To be honest, I didn’t expect Amber to react like that. She seemed so well adapted to Mike’s behavior… Congratulations, Mike, you just found her limits. -__-
OR she just have a shock because he really, actually, officially asked for her hand in marriage ? I wish it would be something like that, but the situation seems pretty hopeless. It makes me a bit sad.
Naw, they all have it. People with glasses have it more.
That’s why I checked on previous pages. Mike hadn’t got those even when other people had, until this last scene.
He’s had faint blush stickers in the last few comics, which is different than his usual appearance. Not quite sure what it means, though.
it means mike was serious about his proposal, contrary to some people’s beliefs.
So…is Mike actually trying to help Robin by thwarting the drama tag?
No, wait. Silly me. What am I saying? The answer’s been in his character description all along. He’s just an asshole.
In what way does this not count as drama?
I figured a “yes” or “no” would be way too easy.
And so it is.
Never commented before, but… I went back a bit, and there is a new arrow pointing at Amber, coming from what’s-his-name, or so it seems. Here’s what it looked like before:
http://www.shortpacked.com/2010/comic/book-12/04-change-is-coming/pentagon/
Jacob. That’s his name. I do believe the new arrow is pointing from Jacob to Amber.
Ooopsie, nevermind… I didn’t read the last part of that comic I linked… I thought Mike drew that new arrow just now… *crawls back into the hole she came out of*
morning sickness
I was waiting for someone to suggest this.
Tomorrow’s surprising twist: Amber’s didn’t walk away because Mike horrified her. She walked away because the little Mike in her belly took this beautiful moment between them as an opportunity to kick her in the bladder.
“Odd, it isn’t morning…”
….She’s pregnant, isn’t she.
Nah. If she were pregnant, she’d be dashing for the restroom, not trudging miserably out of the store. At least, that’s been my (wife’s) experience.
That depends. Sometimes it’s just nausea, sometimes it’s “I’MGONNAPUKERIGHTTHISSECOND!!!” Been through it myself. It varies.
That said, I’m not leaning toward the “she’s pregnant” theory, personally. First, she jerked her hand out of Mike’s, so she’s obviously horrified by what he did. Also, I don’t see her as being careless with the birth control. Of course, if she were on the pill, Mike could have switched them out somehow… he would be the sort to do such a thing…
I wonder if Mike is enough of an asshole to arrange for Amber to get knocked up just so he can make use of his spare coathangers?
The real ironiy would be if Amber was sick due to morning sickness. *strokes chin*
Although, for a while, I thought Mike was progressing from Amber’s influence, I can’t say I’m surprised… Mike has always been an ass.
His character has *always* been an aaaaaaaaaaaaaass.
<//////////3
The part where Mike erases the arrow from the board?
*LIP WIBBLE*
Somehow I feel that this will hurt Mike more than that time he died.
Possibly even more than the time Dina died.
Mike has such an…. odd look on his face.
It’s almost like it’s a pleading look and an apologetic look.
Whatever it is, it’s not his usual scowl.
I’m sad it happened, but I would have been outraged if she took it well.
Well played, Willis, and damn you.
I honestly have to agree. I don’t think Amber deserves Mike, and I don’t think their relationship is healthy in the least. Maybe Mike is actually trying to do her a favor, in his own twisted way. Or maybe he’s just trying to get himself out of the blackmail she put him under.
She hasn’t been blackmailing him for ages. She said flat out she wouldn’t tell anyone his secret even if he left. Mike didn’t need to “escape.”
Kind of amazing how many people keep missing that…
I feel really bad for Amber, but at least she isn’t marrying an asshole. And hey, Mike actually looks pretty miserable throughout this strip! That’s nice.
Mike’s gaze, for whatever reason, has softened considerably in panel 3 from the previous page.
He seemed to grow more and more frustrated with her imperviousness to his shock tactics, and with her increasing unwillingness to go as dark as he’s gone. (The way she acted nicer to Faz seemed to trouble him a lot.) So… was this his ultimate plan? To cure her of him?
Or was there some small part of him that hoped she could rise (or sink) to his level once and for all, so he wouldn’t have to go through the rest of his life essentially alone?
Or both?
Meanwhile, Malaya shows evidence of compassion for her fellow human beings for her second consecutive appearance. No one will notice.
I don’t think Malaya’s expression reads “compassionate.” It looks more matter-of-factly surprised than anything else to me.
(Also, hi, T!)
My thought exactly, but hey, Leslie shares the same expression and I believe SHE cares, so maybe there is still hope for Malaya…
What is this weird assumption of Monsterdom on the part of Malaya? I’m so confused now.
I’d almost have to agree.. but it does seem a bit more than just surprise.
Wait… Did mike just take one for the universe? The only times he’s really shown vulnerability was when Walky nearly beat him to death, and with Amber. Did he lessen the drama tangle on purpose? Damnit Mike… or Willis… just GAH!
Mike taking one for the universe? Hmm. The drama got worse and worse until it consumed Dina. You may be on to something.
I know! I might be giving Willis too much credit as an artist, but look at mike’s expressions. Yesterday it’s a look of pain at having to do this, and today it’s a look of pleading remorse.
I thought Walky used his fists. Him using Amber as a bludgeon would have been a sight to see, though.
I formally withdraw my earlier comment about liking Amber when she is upset. This is too upset to be enjoyed!
While I get the fact that Mike is a complete and utter sociopath and incapable of being a decent boyfriend/husband…
I shamelessly adore Mike/Amber.
I’m so sad now >.<
It occurs…is Malaya on the board?
Also, Mike’s expression kinda reads, “This is who I am. Do you still want me?”
I’d say that’s always been Mike’s question, from the very beginning of their relationship. And he probably honestly and truly wishes the answer could be yes.
Part of me thinks that he knows it is yes and wishes that it were no. He doesn’t want Dinah to happen again.
And maybe, he’s outdone himself enough that it is.
I really didn’t want Mike and Amber to end up together, there’s just something toxic about it. I had actually resolved to stop reading Shortpacked and stick to Dumbing of Age if they ended up together.
About time; I was never a fan of their relationship.
Also, who the hell is Meredith?
Meredith = Asian Female Mike The girl that broke up Amber and her internet boyfriend.
what will happen when mike gets drunk now? will he feel guilty about this or will he just be happy as usual?
She should have hit him again.
ALTERNATELY: she fucks Mike’s dad
Like her response to his proposal should be her shouting “YES YES YES” as she fucks his dad
A better revenge would be for Amber to tape Jacob having sex with Mike’s mother.
Hah… that would still fail. The reason Mike doesn’t like people meeting his parents was because they fight so hard to keep the classic definition of normalcy despite it being plain and clear that Mike is anything but. If his mom banged some sex addict, it’d give Mike the satisfaction of knowing that finally changed.
This storyline is getting better and better, and Friday is coming. What kind of cliffhanger will Mr. Willis have for us then?! This is going to be so epic!
The truth is Mike probably did that for her own good. He’s nice in his own way.
Mike’s eyes, there in panel three. They’re saying, “I’m sorry. This was the best I could do.”
I salute you, you magnificent bastard.
and I salute you. Awesome reference.
http://www.projectwonderful.com/img/uploads/pics/924-1315410355.png
Just saw this ad
Willis you are actually evil
Christ I hope she’s not pregnant…after this THE LAST thing I want is for him to reproduce.
Ok, I’m just gonna quote myself from yesterday’s strip.
Amber, I am disappoint. This is MIKE.
What the hell did you THINK was gonna happen?
You straight up told him that you wanted to date him at his dickish best, and now that he pulls off the ultimate stunt of his very successful trolling career, NOW you flinch?
Also; Mike looks… afraid in panel 3 of what she’ll do. Panel 6 is a sigh of… expectance? And 7 is a definte pissed look.
I don’t think he wanted her to do that, but he knew he had to be true to himself.
I dunno, I think maybe she’s more horrified at the fact that Jacob slept with her mom than the fact that it was MIKE who orchestrated it. But who knows?
ya know… thinking about it, amber might be less sick about the method of proposal and mikes evil, though im sure it contributes, and more from thinking about, and hearing, her mom having sex w/ jake.
i dunno bout you guys but even the thought of my mom having sex with a friend of mine is almost enough to make me vomit.
So what’s Mike going to draw? He’s picked up the chalk, but he hasn’t drawn another line yet. Hmmmm.
i didn’t notice it until someone commented on it, but mike picked up the chalk to scratch out the line between himself and amber.
Just throwing out an idea, but:
A: Who does Amber ALWAYS run to when she can’t handle a situation?
B: Who else is having issues with their significant other right now?
C: What was the very first strip in this storyline about?
she’s running off to see rodimus?
….yes
Was that intentional Mike?
I mean you’re an ass and all, but is that all there is to this?
Perhaps Mike really likes Amber and knows he isn’t right for her so was sabotaging himself?
I also think Amber made the right choice, but part of me feels bad for Mike despite the horrible thing he did.
Then again maybe Mike is just being an asshole!
Either way this is probably for the best…
~~~
On a side note:
I’m tired of “it’s Mike” being used to justify any situation…
I believe that Mike has the obsessive Compulsive need to be the dominant Asshole for so long, that he cannot stop himself even if acting this way ends up driving away someone he loves.
That doesn’t really matter, people with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder should and are still held accountable for their own actions.
That would be the reason why he does something, not a sign that it’s okay for him to do it and it wouldn’t make him sympathetic.
It would be sad, but it would still something he needs to get help for; not something should people use to excuse his behavior (which if he had OCD he‘s probably be aware was inappropriate anyway; heck it would probably explain his attitude towards the world).
I tire of seeing people hold Mike to a different standard than everyone else and treat him like he’s good when he’s being slightly less of an asshole than usual.
That being said: Mike with OCD would be speculation, he could just be an asshole…
When I said Mike has a compulsive need to be an asshole, I didn’t excuse his behaviour, afterall, no decent person would devote their life towards being a total prick to everyone from an early age unless they either had one hell of a Freudian Excuse or just a Bad Seed.
The fact that he is a better person when drunk shows that he has chosen to devote his life to be the ultimate asshole, which he has for so long, he cannot/will not quit even if it hurts him.
Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t assume you tried to excuse his behavior. It’s just that people try to use those kinds of things as an excuse for their favorite character.
Sorry if I offended you by making it seem that I thought you thought that way.
It’s OK I just wanted to avoid any misunderstandings.
There is a number of fictional stories where the people I like as characters are NOT the kind of people I would ever want to deal with in real life.
I expect she’ll be back.
Maybe Amber’s more sick at the idea that she forced Mike to make a proposal… like she saw his face from the previous comic, and how much he was obviously trying to make her regret wanting to get engaged to him with his mean proposals. Maybe she’s “sick” over what she thinks she’s forcing Mike to do… Not that I think so, I think they have a very healthy relationship, in their own way.
*grasping for Mike/Amber straws*
Cut to tomorrow’s strip of Mike in a bar, trying to drown his sorrows for destroying the only positive thing in his life. Last panel: Amber pouncing on Jacob.
Saw your new Shortpacked! add on QC that uses the much more optimistic strip from 2 days ago. Talk about bait and switch. lol
This can’t be the end. Mike reads people incredibly well, and I think he was sincere about proposing and wanting Amber to say yes. His entire life has been dedicated to hurting people in the most painful ways possible (or at least available), but he’d use that power for good if he wanted, which I think he did here.
haha, nice good going Mike you finally drove her away…. or did you?
Do we notice that the people who love Mike and whom Mike (ostensibly) loves seem to end up hurt or dead? Granted I never got the unreleased It’s Walky or Joyce and Walky strips but I noticed it with Dina as well. Mike constantly told her that he didn’t like her, critized her when displaying signs of the opposite feelings (going with her to the museum, checking up on her before she had sex, engineering her break up with Walky). She continued to “love/obcess” over him until her just before her death which Mike seemed uncharacteristically upset about. Maybe he is trying to protect Amber from a similar fate and/or marriage with an asshole (as Mike undoubtably is an asshole and unable or unwilling to change.)? Maybe I’m just trying to rationalize so I can still root for my favorite pairing.
Damn you, Willis, well played.
Amber will do something to get horrible revenge on Mike, and this will only turn him on.
i’m okay with this as long as i don’t have to see that weird mike smile again.
Also (assuming Mike and Amber are truly over). there seems to be a Joss Whedon level of horribly sad break ups recently. All that’s left is Ethan and Drew…
And even there, there’s a storm brewing about Ethan’s toy collecting.
I’ll break fourteen years of radio silence reading your comics to say, “Holy crap on a stick, that was HARSH O.o”
Yeah… Best she be reminded now, before she commits to him permanently – but if they survive this, they’ll survive ANYTHING.
Did Mike set up this entire Xanatos Gambit simply to get rid of her?
Did Mike actually propose tho? he just got down on one knee and played a recording of her mom having sex with the dude who has a crush on her. The intent was to make it LOOK like a proposal, but I don’t think this counts as that.
no.. that was a proposal. he was looking for the most horrifying way of doing it, but I think it was meant. I wonder if perhaps he was trying to give her true insight into the black void where his soul would normally be. I assume this is why liquor makes him happy, the lack of inhibitions makes him feel free to be a nicer person vs the hard work of fucking everyone’s mom in the ass at all times. can you even imagine how many mothers there are on earth at this moment? the man is a saint to keep up all that fucking.
did you read the recording he played for amber? it was a proposal.
Honestly I didn’t, I just skimmed over it assuming it was various sex noises. Now that i payed closer attention to it, that is EVIL. Good going Mike!
I feel as thought Mike has punched my soul through the fourth wall…
It’s more or less what I wanted, but fucksake.
I loveses it. I’ve never been able to understand any kind of fan-support for this relationship – it came about as the result of blackmail from an emotionally-damaged character, and one-half of it is a character who has been an unrepentant monster for over a decade of comics, whose original character profile back in the day made a point of stipulating that there was no *reason* he was this way, and not to look for any good or rationale in him. I’ve always been very twitchy when strips seems to portray Amber and Mike as being in anything resembling a healthy relationship (the Honey-Bun story springs to mind), but now? To believe that the entire thing was a long con by Mike leading up to this point? Fuck and yes.
Wow; I mean yeah you are right, but wow! Looking away from the idea that this may have been used to give Mike some development so he’s not just a cardboard cutout or a flat character. Ignoring that the possibility that the original profile may or may not still be canon…
The pairing?
It’s because Mike is cute.
Sure the fans might get mad. They might come up with excuses or claim I’m flaming them or say I’m being a jerk or any number of things. They might say I hate Mike even though I like him.
But in the end that is what it comes down to. THEY KNOW that is what it comes down to…
Mike is hot and let’s be honest – Amber! Is! Hot! This is all they needed.
Combine that with fantasy fulfillment (people wishing that once in awhile they could act like Mike) and you’ve got Mike/Amber shippers.
Sure after they started dating people got some nice moments that established them as workable to some extent, but these moments are grossly overshadowed by Mike’s personality and consistent actions. Said fans chose to ignore those factors and rationalize Mike’s behavior – coming up with absurd reasons, blaming others, and so forth.
Even if Mike is developing emotions that resemble normal humans (as in the possibility that he really liked Amber) this is not a sign that he is good!
However I’m shocked that you aren’t aware of the common effect in which people brush away villains and bad peoples evil actions (especially if it’s a good looking villain or bad person) so they can fawn over them. It’s common in fandoms.
This often includes
Demonizing nicer characters (Jacob is bad for questioning Amber‘s judgment. Amber is bad for walking away!)
Using logical fallacy to justify a characters behavior (Mike is honest so it’s okay! Amber is happy so it‘s okay!)
Double standards (Anyone else and it would be bad, but with Mike it’s fine)
Coming up with (misused) mental disorders and neurosis that must be influencing the character and totally justify everything about them.
Bringing up (or just making up) tragic back stories for said character that still wouldn’t justify their actions.
Cherry-picking events well ignoring contrary events.
And much much more!.
A similar thing is ignoring good characters bad traits if you relate to them and demonizing those who point out said bad traits. (Calling Drew abusive for being worried that Ethan‘s collecting is getting out of hand)
I blame Disney, or rather i blame the brothers Grimm first then Disney for prettying it up. we have beauty and the beast to blame for Amberike shippers. we see the horrible monster before us, and we want to believe love can change him. we see the aloof and bookish beauty loving the beast for who he is and cheer. here’s the problem… the prince is a pussy, no-one likes a pussy. I don’t think anyone really wants mike to reform, and unless amber can accept her bestiality fetish that ship is going down faster than a virgin on prom night dosed with Gamma-Hydroxybutyric acid.
Why the Brother’s Grimm? They did the same thing Disney did first.
The original Grimm fairy tales were not so nice, but you are correct in a sense. They took existing folklore and repackaged it into stories which they published as their own. Disney just took it one step further and dumbed it down more. The original folklore actually was surprisingly close in the main theme of the adaptation in this case, major difference being the beast basically curled up and died before belle got back. Disney would prefer you to be near death or offscreen when you die. I don’t blame Disney for the stories, I blame them for massproducing them and making them pretty.
Actually the Disney version seems to get misremembered (I blame the horrible mid-quel) or the point missed; it actually avoided the originals issues for the most part. Belle only started getting along with the Beast when HE stopped acting like an ass and tried to shape up. Before that Belle acted like someone who desperately tried to escape and hated her situation. (Unless you count the scene where he saved her from the wolves so she brought him back to the castle and tended to his wounds which I don’t see as particularly bad given that Belle leaving someone who just saved her to die would be callous at best sociopath at it’s worse)
But yeah those “love redeems” relationships tend to get glorified (The original was basically Stockholm Syndrome and/or love makes everything GOOD automatically depending on the ending).
Also as for dumbing them down; depends on the story. I’m not really a Disney fan (Although I love Beauty and the Beast and… well that’s it really), but a lot of people are quick to defend the originals because they came first ignoring that they had like millions of different versions and Disney just made one more which isn‘t all the much more stupid than the original – although they do tend to be less dark (I don‘t like the general assumption that dark = smart).
Although some of the original stories are better or more intelligent.
Mike/Amber does seem to be born for the general assumption that “bad boys” are “cool”.
Just a note. The Brothers Grimm made a lot of the tales nicer. Using the phrase grimmification is a malapropism mostly because people generally came across the darker Grimm stories afterward. Most of the stories were actually darker before they published them. The same can probably even be said of Charles Perrault and so on and so forth. But laying blame to anyone is ridiculous on something that is so ingrained in several cultures.
And this, I fear, is why I don’t ship.
Actually, hun, some of us just like the pairing because in FICTION we like messed up relationships. They’re interesting to read about. I’ve always been a sucker for “evil love”–Xanatos/Fox, Drakken/Shego, that sort of thing, where the folks in the relationship are pretty awful and often to each other, but still stick around. In real life, no, that would suck. But in real life I wouldn’t really want to know most of the SP cast anyway.
Get off your high horse. Not everything is as cut-and-dry as “the squeeing moronic fangirls are distracted by hotness!”
I almost agree.
You see, I don’t care if they’re ship sinks or meets. I can see their relationship working because…
AMBER IS A JERKASS.
Not 100% by any means, of course. But a good amount of the time, she is far more caustic and petty then she ever realizes. In her mind she’s a victim, but she’s really quite a bully most of the time.
Let’s remember that Mike confessed his love for Amber after she punched him, knocking him on his ass and cut his lip.
It would work if Amber wants a relationship that is intentionally abusive.
Mike crossed out HIS attraction to Amber. You know what he did the last time he touched the chalkboard? He made a CORRECTION.
In the other direction,
And the crowd started shouting out…
INTERJECTIONS!
Cheese, I love Schoolhouse Rock!
Surprised I’m the first person to mention this, but…she hasn’t actually said no, at least not yet.
Sorry guys, but that’s a double-ended arrow Mike’s crossed out. Look at the first strip the chalkboard was in. He’s not crossing out just Amber’s attraction to him, or just his to her, he’s crossing out the relationship.
oh the humanity! the Amberike is sinking but the shippers refuse to stop playing their tiny violins… the cynical bastards over on the newly christined Leslaya continue to laugh and party as if there is not a care in the world! the iceberg is coming people! willis spares noone!
He’s kind of like Joss Whedon that way. Real life drama spares no one, and fictional drama is more compelling when it does the same.
i’ll never let go!
Amber’s going outside now?
Just wait ’till she sees the dead cats.
Amber how could you he put alot of work into this to make your mother propose to you! and you just walk out on him *tut tut* shame on you
Mike wins.
I’m sure someone has noticed this before, but Mike’s had pink spots on his cheeks ever since like, 2 or 3 posts ago. And he’s not drunk. That we can see. He may actually be sincere about this…
No Amber goes and nails JAcob
Worse, Amber gets really drunk and wakes up in bed with Faz.
Cannot be unseen
You know, even though I’ve started to like Amber again, and I do feel some sympathy for her (which would have been impossible a couple months ago), I still feel she had this coming. I mean, she blackmailed Mike of all people, basically the equivalent of playing with matches in a gas station. So I’m not the least bit surprised that it blew up in her face. I am surprised Mike took this long to exact his vengeance, but obviously he knew the right time to act. And even if Mike did have genuine feelings for Amber, there’s still no way he could let the blackmail go unpunished. It’s just not how he works.
But Ethan’s going to have a heck of time putting her back together after this. But that’s what a best friend’s for.
Well played, Mr. Warner. Well played.
I noticed the Chalk Board now has it’s own Tag.
This and http://www.shortpacked.com/comics/2011-09-05-fault.png have been the most interesting breaking of the 4th Wall I’ve read since the first run of She-Hulk.
Well, I’m kinda happy. I do think what Mike did to propose was low even by Mike standards, so it’s good to see that he’s not getting rewarded for it.
I don’t think everyone understands how Mike works (possibly including Mike).
Judging by his past behavior, Mike wants to physiologically torture Amber, then take it as Amber beats the living stuffing out of him, and then they get mushy.
If my take on this is correct, it would help if Mike just came out and explained the f$#@ed up way he likes it, but I suspect he’s one of those idiots who thinks his ‘true wuv’ will just know. I suspect he thought of Amber as this type of person. Like most people, he has an immature expectation that a good partner will read his mind.
Of course, Amber might accept all of this. It depends if she either wants to try to change him, break up, or accept him. It’s all in her court.
I actually think she is going to get it and accept him. She’s a bit of a jerk-ass herself, and I could see her coming to love pounding Mike to keep him in line.
I wonder if this is how Kris Humphries proposed to Kim Kardashian? Using her own sex tape?
Well Amber you wanted something Twitterable about your marriage proposal.
Mike delivered.
How do you explain that in 140 characters? That’s a whole LJ entry right there.
Three entries and a YouTube video.
I hope Amber goes outside and vomits, then arranges the vomit into a big “YES!”
CHEESE ON A BIKE
I don’t get why Mike did this. I mean, the obvious answer is “It’s Mike, this is what he does” but… He said in an earlier strip that he loved Amber, and she obviously something that makes him happy, even if he doesn’t show it. So why would he hurt her in such a terrible way? Is his own happiness worth a horrible prank that will only make his life worse? Mike’s relationship with Amber despite his apparent horribleness was giving him real depth, but with this, he’s starting to look like a more shallow character. He’s always been my favourite, but this just seems even more awful than his usual behaviour.
@HarrietRants: “I don’t get why Mike did this. I mean, the obvious answer is “It’s Mike, this is what he does” but… He said in an earlier strip that he loved Amber…”
He admitted this after she punched him hard enough to knock him on his ass and make him bleed. She did this after he heckled her into a rage. He loves to psychologically torture people. I’d bet money he likes being punched. Mike loves abusing and getting abuse. His definition of love is probably not yours. (This is a good thing.)
Mike liked it that Amber blackmailed him into dating her. He liked she razed him by dropping the ‘M’ word out of no wear. Mike is not nice and loves what is not nice about Amber.
@HarrietRants:”Mike’s relationship with Amber despite his apparent horribleness was giving him real depth, but with this, he’s starting to look like a more shallow character. He’s always been my favourite, but this just seems even more awful than his usual behaviour.”
Lol!
There is a reason the Meridith and Nathan Tags are on this comic, or did you forget this?
http://www.shortpacked.com/comics/2009-05-21-frame.png
I think you might be experiencing a case of ‘Draco in Leather Pants.’
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/DracoInLeatherPants
I never assumed Mike was better than he’s been set out to be, and I certainly don’t have a case of Draco in Leather Pants. I just thought that when Mike said he loved Amber, he actually meant it.
I think he does mean it. I just don’t think he shares your sense of what love is, or how to show it. This is probably how Mike shows his deep, deep love. It’s scary. Mike’s a scary guy.
He’s really not the guy for Amber unless she decides she wants to be as abusive as him.
Because you assume he MEANT what he said.
Anyone notice it’s Amber’s old look on the chalkboard?
That’s because the chalkboard predates Amber’s makeover.
Also, DAMN YOU WILLIS!
You know what’s sad. I didn’t know he proposed until people started saying it today and I had to go back and read it. At first I was like “Who the hell makes those sex noises?” Shame shame.
So. Thinking back. I guess its a fitting end to a relationship that started with blackmail.
Lol! It’s way too early to write this relationship off as dead.
Remember that Amber’s role-model for a husband will be her dad. Mike at his worst might still be better then her father. And yes, I have been paying attention to Mike at his worst.
I’ll place a bet that she’ll come back, beat him down, and then go off to celebrate.
This is karmic punishment for Amber mocking the power of the Drama Tag.
Prediction for tomorrow’s strip:
Mike walks out the door to go home for the night and finds a parking lot full of dead cats spelling out the word “YES”.
Now to be serious for a moment: I’m not sure who I feel worse for – Amber or Mike.
Just curiosity… Mike managed to break up with Amber in just exactly the way that would prevent her from getting together with Jacob, right after Amber and Jacob finally admitted their mutual attraction to each other. Is this just typical Mike being as asshole to them both or is Mike actually jealous?
Mike is whatever you don’t want him to be, baby.
http://www.shortpacked.com/2006/comic/book-3-is-totally-gay/04-head-of-the-schemin/scientific/
I’m confused, lots of visual symbolism, the patting down & using the chalkboard. With Mike’s non-emotive face and from his declaration of love earlier I’m not sure if he wants to hurt Amber or is in love with her. Too much ambiguity,
I feel the ambiguous End of Evangelion line “Kimochi warui” applies here XD
After all this time with Mike, I’d have thought Amber would have said “Pfft, Yer gonna have to do better than that. Get working on those cats.” and went back to work.
I’m confused by everyone’s reaction to this. Isn’t this how a guy normally goes about breaking up with a crazy chick that originally blackmailed him into a relationship and then expected a marriage proposal? It’s how I usually do it and I make it as public as possible. Because, you know, I’m constantly being blackmailed into relationships with head cases.
Common Denominator’d.
Why are the love heptagon and nonagon missing in the graph? Also, how on earth can the blackboard still say “pentagon” after all this time? It has to be months since Robin found out emotional relations in Shortpacked! are more complicated.
And poor Amber… (almost) like it is written in the book: “Ah, distinctly I remember, it was in the bleak December and each seperate dying Amber wrought its ghost upon the floor.” :’(
Interesting that the middle panel contains all of the women working at the store, and only the women.
I can’t see that now without adding a word balloon for Robin, offering to take Amber’s place in the proposed 3m.
Thinking about it today, I find it interesting how vocal people are about Mike and Amber.
I never liked or disliked them. They’re fictional, if it’s a little unrealistic, that’s okay long as it made for an entertaining story. Fiction means it can be unreal. I don’t know if I can understand.
I…..I honestly don’t know if I want to keep reading this comic. The two reasons I read it are gone now. And my faith in Willis is almost gone. I’m so broken hearted. Why does he have to ruin everything?
I think Willis has a tendency to eventually bring things around to a happy ending, he just does it over a very long period of time. I’m pretty much 100% positive at this point that we’ll be back to Robin+Leslie after a while. Maybe a year or two, though.
Because it’s his? Not that I agree with you that he’s ruining it. Because I don’t. At all. But considering the fact that Shortpacked came from his imagination he has every right to take it where he feels it needs to go. Because it’s his thing. He owns it.
He keeps you guessing, he brings people together which seem to be interesting pairings, has said pairings pay off for a bit, then chips at the foundation so we can watch the building crumble. He is a cruel cruel god. By next year Robin will be in an epic hatefuck relationship with Sydney, Amber will be with Jacob, Mike will be with Faz, and Ethan will be with Reagon. Why? because he is Willis, and he will write it so well you will cheer for them.
Wait, one of the things that kept you reading was an abusive relationship? Twilight really is fucking things up for everyone.
Thank you, I hate Twilight. But keep the assumptions going.
Also, some of us happen to think the relationship was not as abusive as you think. Amber didn’t find it abusive. And frankly, as long as the person is happy, there isn’t a problem. If she’s no longer happy, than there is. But as it’s most likely over, the problem is moot.
Because that’s what the best stories do: strike an emotional impact where it hits the hardest.
I see what you did there….
Start off with a comic that makes the commenters think that Ethan and Drew are headed to Splitsville… leading up to this.
And yes, I do realize that this is my 3rd comment on this strip, shut up. >_> It broke my brain badly enough that it took me this long to put everything together.
Is that a yes? I think that was a yes.
Oh thank goodness, finally!
It might be kind of stupid, but I always hated them together. I love Mike as a character and Amber is pretty cool, too, but the way she tricked him into that relationship was just… meh. I guess I like him when he’s cool and an asshole and Amber kind of made him soft.
*crosses fingers and hopes they won’t get back together* =)
Here’s my thing though. If Mike is JUST an asshole, then he doesn’t make any real sense as a long term character. He has to have an underlying interest in the well being of others in at least a general sense. He didn’t need to fight as hard for SEMME as he did, he didn’t need to push Joyce out of the way as effectively as he did to get the crack in he was making, and there was no asshole reason to fight the Honeybun in Manhattan, or, more importantly, save Amber from falling to her death. Who could seriously argue that that was in his self interest? If he doesn’t have some underlying interest in other people, and Amber, then I don’t get him at all.
Mike is everything you don’t want him to be, those things include deep nuanced compelling and interesting. Noone wants the guy who makes doing your mom jokes to be anything more than a one note asshat. Mike laughs at your perceptions. He had a damn good reason for doing your mom, you won’t find out until much later why. It will shock and amaze you when you find out. You will thank him, but wonder if he was just being an asshole at the same time.
What a way to break things off.
Whoa!
Shortpacked! has one of those shopping cart escalators- sweet!
http://www.shortpacked.com/2009/comic/book-9/09-grand-reopening/tour/
Sweet indeed.
that was rather epic, now all it needs is someone giving him an epic kick to the nertz to really wrap it all up nicely.
Honestly?
I think a lot of you got this all wrong.
Panel 6: Mike looks happy with himself.
Panel 7: This panel needs to be read from right to left. Mike’s entire expression in response to the shock is simply, an unquestioningly…
“What.”
As if to say, “You were expecting maybe Edward Cullen?”
…What a self-destructive person he is. Like a grenade hitting all nearby people with shrapnel~
I swear to god, this is what I’ll do if my girlfriend ever gets too pushy. Mike, you sir, are an inspiration.
Mike actually looks unhappy in that third panel. I wonder if a part of him regrets this. As for Amber… I’m a bit disappointed. I can’t say this couldn’t happen, but I really did expect her to be ready for something like this. After all, its Mike.
Although I have to wonder if Amber will accept this as a break-up. After all, she just left. She never said it was over with them.
I have two sides to this.
Now all you need to do is make sure that this doesn’t lead to any big problems. XD
My male side: Great Job Mike. You just got a pushy girl off your back.
My female side(since I am a girl): WTH MIKE! I know Amber was…well annoying, but that took is a little to far. You know that Amber is suppose to be the one to push forward with her feelings, and when she took it to far you decided to break off literally the whole thing…unless it means that Mike likes her back, but wants her to go at his pace. Either way we’ll find out what happens in a little.
In all this is just one huge mind fudge! >.<
I love Mike for the same reason I love the Joker – they’re both insane and evil and make life miserable for other characters I like. I’m the kind of person who enjoys platonic hurt/comfort fic because seeing my favorites in pain and working it out makes me all happy inside.
That said, I can’t decide whether I love this or hate this. It is a true tribute to Mike’s ability to make life miserable… but I can’t help but think it is also making HIM miserable at the same time.
I just want people to be happy. But this is fiction, and conflict is the root of all fiction. Just as long as it eventually settles onto a happy note, please? A little angst and drama is all well and good for a little while, but then I get depressed.
I know I’m like the fiftieth person to do this, but it honestly was the very first thing that popped into my head when I read this.
NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
She knew he was a manipulative jerk and said she liked it, I guess he wanted to put that to the test.
See, while everyone else was either noticing or not noticing the “drunk Mike” tag, I decided to click on the “chalkboard” tag. And that was when I noticed what Mike was really doing there: Scratching out the arrow connecting himself and Amber.
And leaving in the arrow connecting Jacob and Amber, which Mike himself drew last October.
So Mike has figured out that, in the long run, Amber would be happier with Jacob (who, sex-addiction aside, seems like a nice guy) than she would be with him. Plus, it seems that Jacob is an obsessive collector like Ethan. Who Amber kinda wanted to be with before he came out.
So Mike figures that Jacob, being basically a hetero version of Ethan, is the best fit for Amber.
But sober Mike can’t break up with her, because his asshole-ness is too deeply engrained to let him do something genuinely good. The only way he can do what’s best for Amber is by doing it while drunk, because Drunk Mike is a nice guy.
And since he really does love her, drunk or sober, we kinda have Sober Mike and Drunk Mike working together to do what’s best for Amber.
Super-effed-up, but also kinda sweet.
Aaaaand… No Friday update.
DAMN YOU, WILLIS!!
I knew it. He’s setting us up for a reboot.
Never change, Mike. Never change.
I think I lucked out when my real life got in the way of my web comic habit just long enough to miss this arc, go back and read it quickly just to catch up and get my WTF moment, and then go back again when I really had time so I could thoroughly enjoy this without having to wait until tomorrow.