Shortpacked! by David Willis

Discussion (54) ¬

1. 
   Jen Aside

   February 24, 2011 at 12:03 am | # | Reply

   I’d hate to see someone measuring greater than 1… or is that Mike? =o

   • 
     Amazo

     February 24, 2011 at 12:20 am | # | Reply

     I assume the ADU is a measure of bad parenting. I hope Mike is not a parent of any sort. Can you imagine toddler-Mikespawn? The horror.

     • 
       Madock345

       February 24, 2011 at 12:25 am | # | Reply

       Ahhhh, I assumed that it was a messure of how many affairs the person took part in.
     • 
       David Herbert

       February 24, 2011 at 12:25 am | # | Reply

       They’d be adorable little demons, though I’m guessing their first words would be “I’m going to fuck your mom.”

       • 
         Westacular

         February 25, 2011 at 12:23 am | # | Reply

         And they’d be directed at their father, just to be extra creepy.
     • 
       Doctor Who

       February 24, 2011 at 7:51 am | # | Reply

       I remind you that Amber’s dad produced Faz. Whatever monster might spring from Mike’s loins can’t possibly be that bad.

       Of course, if Mike produces offspring with Amber, the little crotchspawn will share genes with both Faz and Mike.

       That combination might literally be the antichrist. The Walkyverse is doomed! DOOOOMED!

       • 
         Derik

         February 24, 2011 at 1:42 pm | # | Reply

         What if Mike and Faz had a kid?

         • 
           BlueNight

           February 24, 2011 at 7:01 pm | # | Reply

           I’d have said that was impossible, but then I read the notes on the TG-ray strips back in 99.
     • 
       Jetstream

       December 15, 2011 at 12:11 am | # | Reply

       This comment is hilarious in retrospect.

       • 
         tahrey

         June 28, 2012 at 6:12 am | # | Reply

         seconded
       • 
         meanderling

         September 23, 2012 at 2:37 pm | # | Reply

         Oh yeah.
     • 
       Volkai

       September 23, 2012 at 2:46 pm | # | Reply

       Eighteen months later…

       YUP.
2. 
   Wackd

   February 24, 2011 at 12:04 am | # | Reply

   I think this is the first time since 2004 I’ve actually really liked Joe. (Granted, I only just bought Joyce & Walky.)

   • 
     Wackd

     February 24, 2011 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

     Also, that’s referring to Walkyverse!Joe. I keep forgetting there’s two of them now…
3. 
   Mkvenner

   February 24, 2011 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

   Amber’s dad units? explain please.

   • 
     Richard

     February 24, 2011 at 12:15 am | # | Reply

     1 ADUS is how much of a douche Amber’s dad is, presumably.
   • 
     Stephen Bierce

     February 24, 2011 at 12:16 am | # | Reply

     In the Flashbacking chapter in the summer of 2007, it is established that Amber’s father is NOT a nice man.

     • 
       Stephen Bierce

       February 24, 2011 at 12:17 am | # | Reply

       His name is “Blaine”, BTW. For the purpose of tagspotting.
   • 
     Viktor

     February 24, 2011 at 12:16 am | # | Reply

     Read the Shortpacked! archives. Amber’s father was a cheating, abusive asshole. No redeeming qualities whatsoever. Amber being so messed up early on is his fault.

     • 
       Joebo

       February 24, 2011 at 12:17 am | # | Reply

       It is also very likely that he sired Faz, this in itself is a crime against humanity for which there is no recompense.

       • 
         Jen Aside

         February 24, 2011 at 6:09 pm | # | Reply

         DID. Robin did a DNA test on them =/

         • 
           Joebo

           February 24, 2011 at 9:27 pm | # | Reply

           that’s why I said “likely.”
         • 
           Joebo

           February 24, 2011 at 11:51 pm | # | Reply

           oh, DID. When was this? Please cite your sources.
         • 
           Michelle Alford

           February 25, 2011 at 12:56 am | # | Reply

           I will kindly step in to provide Jen’s sources. ^-^ http://www.shortpacked.com/2010/comic/book-12/04-change-is-coming/rockbandthree/
     • 
       Madock345

       February 24, 2011 at 12:23 am | # | Reply

       don’t forget the Mafia (I think it was the Korean Mafia, but whatever, some Criminal Organization)

       • 
         Derik

         February 24, 2011 at 1:44 pm | # | Reply

         And KayBee toys!
4. 
   Alice Macher

   February 24, 2011 at 12:09 am | # | Reply

   D’aww, Joe being sensitive… ♥
5. 
   Joebo

   February 24, 2011 at 12:16 am | # | Reply

   Registered in the International Bureau of Weights and Measures. That’s in France. It’s right next to the Mike.

   • 
     Dean

     February 24, 2011 at 7:18 pm | # | Reply

     Amber’s dad is kept next to the kilogram weight. Except when he’s on the run from the mob, or in jail. Which, admittedly, is most of the time.

     • 
       Joebo

       February 24, 2011 at 9:26 pm | # | Reply

       He’s between “The Mike” and The Kilogram.

       • 
         Mage the Observer

         February 24, 2011 at 10:43 pm | # | Reply

         I think it’d be a little high for a benchmark, though. I mean, why use the worst person you can think of as a baseline? It just encourages people to find someone who’s even worse. Do we really want to see that?

         Then again, most units of measurement are subjective, so that’s probably a minor quibble.
6. 
   Madock345

   February 24, 2011 at 12:27 am | # | Reply

   “the version with Boobs anyway” this means that she is at least a slight improvement, boobs make everything better.

   • 
     Cholma

     February 24, 2011 at 12:33 am | # | Reply

     Can’t argue with that.

     • 
       zodconvoy

       February 24, 2011 at 4:26 am | # | Reply

       Seconded.

       • 
         LiamKav

         February 24, 2011 at 5:02 am | # | Reply

         Not on men, they don’t.

         • 
           killjoevolume1

           February 24, 2011 at 8:47 am | # | Reply

           YMMV – your mileage may vary…put a pair of Double D’s on the roughest, stinkiest, grizzled biker dude, and he’ll be getting a whole lot more “on the houses” drinks at the road bar.
         • 
           begbert2

           February 24, 2011 at 10:33 am | # | Reply

           Response to the above: I’m picturing less free drinks and more vomiting.
         • 
           I.care.0

           February 25, 2011 at 9:24 am | # | Reply

           His name is Robert Paulson.
7. 
   Erin

   February 24, 2011 at 12:52 am | # | Reply

   continuity! fan bonus, yes!!
8. 
   KiZeR

   February 24, 2011 at 1:14 am | # | Reply

   Even a man 1/5th as bad as one Amber’s Dad is still a world class jerk.
9. 
   Patrick McGraw

   February 24, 2011 at 1:57 am | # | Reply

   So I’m guessing that someone could be ranked with multiple ADUs, since it doesn’t appear to be an absolute scale like the Alyson Hannigan Cuteness Scale or the Heather Nova Sexy Voice Scale.
10. 
    T Campbell

    February 24, 2011 at 6:14 am | # | Reply

    I think “Amber’s Dad Units” refers to the number of times Amber’s dad cheated, since it directly follows Joe asking how many times Robin’s dad cheated. Not sure, though: it could be a measure of awful parenting, too. Being stupid is better than being actively hateful.

    It’s a curious dodge, either way. Joe asks “How many times have you screwed up?” and Robin seems to be preparing a list of all her mistakes before he adds “Cheating-wise?” Then he tries to partly absolve her by comparing her to her contemptible father. Robin responds by comparing her dad to Amber’s dad, taking herself out of that equation. What’s YOUR ADU score right now, Robin?

    It’s great to see Joe doing his best to be a good friend, but it’s even better to see Robin resisting any easy ways out. Not that self-pity is the answer, but neither would be Robin’s usual tactics of denial and laughing off unpleasantness. Still, Joe’s right: the fact that Robin recognizes this pattern means it’s not too late for her to pull out of it.

    Whether it’s too late for her and Leslie is a question to be resolved at a later date. Still, while she’s there, it may be worth asking what happened to Rachel, and how many ADUs Joe earned when he was with her.

    And yeah, Erin, this whole story is like Christmas for continuity wonks like us. Here’s hoping the previous month has placated the Batfans for a bit.

    • 
      MonkeyBiz

      February 24, 2011 at 7:29 am | # | Reply

      I have always found it funny that Joe is the voice of reason most of the time. He is a very well balanced person. No amount of toys or sex seem to tip the scales the other way.
    • 
      sun tzu

      February 24, 2011 at 9:14 am | # | Reply

      “Robin’s usual tactics of denial and laughing off unpleasantness”…As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, my theory is that Robin has been trying to crank herself up to 11 since pulling the drama tag, in the hope that she can infuse enough comedy to keep the comic from turning into a tragedy.
      And, well, she’s now seen that her strategy’s failed.
11. 
    Volkai

    February 24, 2011 at 9:40 am | # | Reply

    I think ADUs measures general bad-parent-ness, since the question preceding its use was not how many times Robin’s dad screwed around, but how many times he screwed up.
12. 
    egreif

    February 24, 2011 at 10:33 am | # | Reply

    I think Amber’s Dad Units isn’t a measure of bad-parent-ness, but a bad-person-ness. Cheating is only a small part of how awful Amber’s Dad is. Amber’s Dad has been involved not just in relationship infidelity, but is actively participating in organized crime as well as being abusive and hurtful with those he interacts with in any capacityl
13. 
    Al the Mighty

    February 24, 2011 at 3:36 pm | # | Reply

    Does Joe know who Amber is?

    • 
      Joebo

      February 24, 2011 at 9:26 pm | # | Reply

      Maybe? I think Amber was a guest at Walky and Joyce’s wedding.

      • 
        Joebo

        February 24, 2011 at 11:49 pm | # | Reply

        By “guest” I mean Mike’s +1
14. 
    Joel

    February 24, 2011 at 4:12 pm | # | Reply

    “Reminded me of my father,” huh? Not “I self-sacrificingly pushed you into the arms of another because that seemed to be what you both wanted?”

    Occam’s Drama Razor, man. Especially when the daddy issues are already covered, yeah?

    I hasten to add that the plotline is awesome in general, though!

    • 
      Wackd

      February 24, 2011 at 4:20 pm | # | Reply

      That bit came later, though. She didn’t fall for him until after she realized him being a womanizing pig didn’t automatically make him a bad guy and by that time he had fallen for someone else.

      • 
        Joel

        February 25, 2011 at 1:43 am | # | Reply

        Hmm, interesting. I’ll admit my memory on that bit’s a little hazy. I’m still not convinced the daddy issues aren’t shoehorned in, and it seems a little crowded in that particular shoe.
15. 
    ColdFusion

    February 24, 2011 at 8:51 pm | # | Reply

    I thought he was Robin’s dad, for a while there.. so .. heh. shows how well I pay attention..
16. 
    thomas0comer

    November 25, 2011 at 5:39 pm | # | Reply

    ADU’s are the douchebag equivalent of Kilonazis, it would seem.
    http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0489.html
    I just KNOW that’s the TVTropes image for something, but I can’t find what…