Shortpacked! by David Willis

Discussion (47) ¬

1. 
   Touch of Grey

   February 16, 2011 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

   …yup.
2. 
   Nei

   February 16, 2011 at 12:21 am | # | Reply

   :O

   No.

   ….Although I admit I was somewhat charmed by him in that post-apocalyptic world in JL. >_> Apparently all it takes is a little isolation in a corner.

   • 
     Jetstream

     December 14, 2011 at 7:00 pm | # | Reply

     For, like, two billion years.
3. 
   Stephen Bierce

   February 16, 2011 at 12:26 am | # | Reply

   Any relation to Steve Savage, WW1 fighter pilot and archrival of Enemy Ace?

   • 
     David Willis

     February 16, 2011 at 12:28 am | # | Reply

     Probably. Vandal Savage is thousands of years old and has sired countless children in those thousands of years. It’d be more of a surprise if he *weren’t* related somehow, shared last name or no.

     • 
       samuel

       February 16, 2011 at 12:47 am | # | Reply

       Technically speaking, he should be related to nearly everyone on earth(and then some) in the DCU.

       Even more disturbing, more than likely he had kids with the decedents of his kids.

       If one were to think about it, this would create a huge inbreeding problem for the DCU. It’s probably best not to think about it too much.

       • 
         Amazo

         February 16, 2011 at 3:24 am | # | Reply

         Inbreeding ceases to be a problem after the relatives become remote enough. Every human, and all living things for that matter, are interrelated. And no, not in a vague hippie energy field way, we are literally all interrelated by family. Because genetics are modular, there is very little trace of the original relation after a dozen generations or so.

         • 
           samuel

           February 16, 2011 at 4:31 am | # | Reply

           You are absolutely correct.

           The problem arises (if one were to take DCU continuity too seriously) Vandal Savage re-introduces his genetic code every generation or so.

           There wouldn’t be several generations to dilute the original. Furthermore, Savage would be introducing new offspring that would grow exponentially every generation, supposing he stays randy enough.

           Additionally, Savage would introduce “healthy” DNA every time he procreates, while the inbred portion of the population would weaken. In a closed system, Savage’s direct offspring would have an advantage, while the 2nd and 3rd generation decedents would face the effects of inbreeding. This gives a direct advantage to the closest descendants of Vandal Savage, and means a larger portion of the population would tend to be closely related to him.

           Granted, if the population grew large enough, Vandal Savage couldn’t procreate enough to cause any problems. But early on, when the population is small, he could cause some serious problems.

           Of course, if a portion of the population were to get isolated, over time they could overcome they horrors of Vandal Savage’s Dong. Sort of like the Galápagos Islands for humanity.

           Also, this is the DCU. Aliens that can breed with humans show up every other day. There’s no reason to assume that’s a recent thing. A regular injection of alien DNA(BA DA BUMP) would add some diversity to fix the issue.

           This disregards the fact that species from another planet shouldn’t be able to breed with Earth_People.

           Fundamentally, applying this discussion to a fictional world with made-up science is kind of pointless. But it was fun while I’m having insomnia.
         • 
           Alice

           February 17, 2011 at 2:31 pm | # | Reply

           Of course you have to note that he comes in at 50,000 bc and was close to the homo sapiens. It’s also important to note that although he is the only “Homo Sapien Sapien”, there are still thousands, of others that he can mate with, and the variation is already inherent. The only major thing of note is that he is there in each generation to reintroduce his genes, that if beneficial, will lead towards more people being like him, but if his genes do not have a discernible effect, then they spread randomly. This would actually make sense if the super ability genes came from savage and are in fact only found in 5% of humans.
         • 
           I.care.0

           February 17, 2011 at 9:04 pm | # | Reply

           You guys are arguing about genetic variaton in the DCU? Really?
         • 
           kakatana

           April 26, 2011 at 2:38 pm | # | Reply

           Why not? You’re reading a comic about a gay Transformers-obsessed wannabe-standup comedian, and some people out there are smart enough AND geeky enough to take comics just that seriously.
       • 
         Lokitsu

         February 16, 2011 at 5:29 pm | # | Reply

         I’ve wondered if Vandal Savage’s mutant DNA is the reason humans in the DCU gain super powers so easily. I remember in some crossover years ago that the alien Dominion tested 100 humans by exposing them to lethal radiation, exotic chemicals, etc. They expected one human out of the hundred would survive and gain powers. Instead FIVE did.

         • 
           Brendan

           February 17, 2011 at 7:16 pm | # | Reply

           …well, that was a shitty test then!

           I mean, you’ve got to figure, if they expected one out of a hundred to survive, and tested on a hundred, there’s about a 1/e chance NONE of them would, and they’d have to go round up another hundred people to kill…
         • 
           Pagannerd

           February 18, 2011 at 6:05 am | # | Reply

           The moral of the story is “aliens blow at trial design”.
       • 
         LT

         February 18, 2011 at 11:40 am | # | Reply

         Your spelling makes things interesting … I assume you meant “descendants”, which is not the same as “decedents” (meaning dead people), which actually implies that he was either making babies with his dead children or with people his kids killed. Choose your interpretation, it sounds like the second option is likely true enough.

         • 
           samuel

           February 19, 2011 at 2:31 am | # | Reply

           Yep, I meant descendants.

           That’s what I get for typing fast and not proofreading.

           One day spellcheck will end us all.
     • 
       Daibhid Ceannaideach

       February 16, 2011 at 6:32 am | # | Reply

       Steve Savage was the son of Brian Savage, the Scalphunter. According to the DC Database, Brian was related to Matt Savage, Trailboss in some ill-defined way, and this Savage family has no connection to Vandal Savage. Or Dr Clark Savage Jr.

       While I normally love “character in a relationship seems to be talking to their partner but is actually talking to someone else/an inanimate object” gags, the problem with this one is, it’s Ethan. It would have been more surprising if he had been talking to Drew…
     • 
       Jack

       February 16, 2011 at 1:53 pm | # | Reply

       Well at one point it was confirmed that Roy Harper (aka Speedy aka Arsenal aka Red Arrow aka Arsenal again) is a descendant of Vandal Savage, and one close enough for him to be useful as spare parts for Vandal Savage.

       And Roy is also related to Jim “Guardian” Harper and all his clones, so they’re probably Savage descendants too. And there’s a cop character who is Jim’s niece Jamie, who started off in Gotham then moved to Metropolis and was impregnated by Mon-El.

       And to tie in to another comment here, it turns out thanks to a recent retcon that the entire Daxamite race, and Mon-El by extension, is descended from a human who had sex with a woman from an alien race that itself was the product of breeding between Kryptonians and one of their neighbour species.

       So, given Vandal Savage’s fecundity, he might well be the ancestor of an entire alien species as well as the majority of our own.
   • 
     GrassyNoel

     February 16, 2011 at 12:59 am | # | Reply

     I’m just hoping that he’s not related to Randy Savage. Now there’s a stage name!

     • 
       gwalla

       February 16, 2011 at 3:33 pm | # | Reply

       OHHHHH YEAHHHHHH
     • 
       PedanticJerkass

       February 17, 2011 at 8:58 pm | # | Reply

       BOOOOONNNEEESAAAAWWW IS REEAAADDDYYYYYYYYYYYY!

       • 
         gwalla

         February 20, 2011 at 7:13 pm | # | Reply

         “They call you Hollywood? Don’t make me laugh!
         ‘Cause your movies and your acting skills are both trash
         Your movies straight to video, the box office can’t stand
         While I got myself a feature role in Spider-Man!”
         — Macho Man Randy Savage, “Be A Man”

         …yeah, Randy Savage actually believes that his cameo in Spider-Man was bigger than any of Hulk Hogan’s parts, and said so. In rap form.
     • 
       Bill M.

       February 18, 2011 at 12:53 pm | # | Reply

       You mean Randy Poffo.
4. 
   queenanthai

   February 16, 2011 at 12:34 am | # | Reply

   I want a Scandal Savage.
5. 
   David Herbert

   February 16, 2011 at 12:37 am | # | Reply

   I like Scandal Savage better.

   • 
     Viktor

     February 16, 2011 at 12:41 am | # | Reply

     Is there anyone that doesn’t?

     • 
       samuel

       February 16, 2011 at 12:48 am | # | Reply

       I loathed Scandal’s costume, but the character has really grown on me.

       Hell, all the Secret Six has.
6. 
   Shift

   February 16, 2011 at 1:18 am | # | Reply

   You totally know that if Ethan ever proposes to Drew it’s not going to be this heartfelt and romantic but rather, “Well, you’ve got a big apartment with a lot of shelf-space for my toys, so I was thinking we should get married.” And then he smiles a very obliviously stupid but oddly adorable vacant-eye smile.
7. 
   arjay2813

   February 16, 2011 at 1:58 am | # | Reply

   does he have perverse sexual lust for all villains, or is this bad-boy thing just for Vandal http://www.shortpacked.com/2011/comic/book-12/08-this-is-so-babies/six since its another villain/ethan strip

   • 
     Shift

     February 16, 2011 at 3:53 am | # | Reply

     I honestly think his obsessive compulsive desire for toys, has, as a result, affected all aspects of his life. So since toys are his primary joy, Drew has to use assorted toy related stimuli to maintain Ethans’ attention.

     That or Ethan is just a bit wacky.
   • 
     Shade

     February 16, 2011 at 4:25 am | # | Reply

     Ah but you see he dresses as the Riddler, so Drew can be Batman and capture him. Seems he’s way more interested in Batman. Though one could argue Batman though a hero is a bad-boy…

     @Shift: I don’t know what comic you’ve been reading but they’re all wacky.
8. 
   TemplarKnight

   February 16, 2011 at 2:07 am | # | Reply

   Whose boots are those? It reminds me a lot of the Spider-man costume from the new movie.

   Though my guess would be Vigilante, because it’s dc.

   • 
     Shift

     February 16, 2011 at 3:55 am | # | Reply

     Its Superman’s costume, from the episode of JLU in which he was lost in time, but everyone back in the present thought he was dead. If you look at the picture that Willis has posted of Savage, you can see the Superman toy with the beard.
9. 
   Doctor Who

   February 16, 2011 at 7:39 am | # | Reply

   So I take it Ethan has found a away to protect his toys from Singularikitty? Otherwise getting attached to your new ones seems like a bad idea.
10. 
    ziggy78eog

    February 16, 2011 at 9:06 am | # | Reply

    Whew, it is only a Vandal Savage toy. For a brief moment, I thought it was going to be Coors, or Bud Light, or whatever beer commercial has those faux dating site commercials.
11. 
    hectoruno

    February 16, 2011 at 12:53 pm | # | Reply

    Was it ever decided if Vandal Savage is the real Biblical Cain. If so this could be a religious moment.

    • 
      IkaTaii

      February 18, 2011 at 12:35 pm | # | Reply

      The newest Question book, Pipeline, effectively confirms this. It also has Renee kicking SO MUCH ASS.

      • 
        gwalla

        February 20, 2011 at 7:15 pm | # | Reply

        Can’t be, he doesn’t have glasses and Wolverine hair.
12. 
    Liam

    February 16, 2011 at 1:26 pm | # | Reply

    Is this strip referencing anything specific in the dialog and setup? It looks like it is.
13. 
    Matt of Steel

    February 16, 2011 at 1:54 pm | # | Reply

    I’m pretty sure that Vandal Savage could form a group called the “Savage Six-Pack” with himself, Adam Savage, Fred Savage, Randy Savage, Herschel Savage, and Doc Savage.
14. 
    Kneel!

    February 16, 2011 at 2:04 pm | # | Reply

    Is anybody else going to get this toy just to pretend it’s actually General Zod? I know I am.

    • 
      Trae Dorn

      February 16, 2011 at 9:42 pm | # | Reply

      I’m gonna pretend it’s The Master.

      • 
        Pagannerd

        February 18, 2011 at 6:08 am | # | Reply

        It is the Master. After all, he is everyone, and everyone is him…
15. 
    Dierna

    February 16, 2011 at 2:07 pm | # | Reply

    Awesome!! A Vandal Savage fig!! I hope Dean Cain returns as Vandal before Smallville ends. Smallville’s take on Vandal Savage is such a tragic character.
16. 
    James

    February 17, 2011 at 12:53 am | # | Reply

    Pah! There is only room for Doom in the hearts of Men.
17. 
    Mole204

    February 17, 2011 at 3:33 am | # | Reply

    This is about as ‘surrender to the dark side’ as Ethan gets without talking posters. If he got any more twisted around Ethan would be dressing up as Lashina.
18. 
    Zahariel

    February 18, 2011 at 3:29 am | # | Reply

    And here I seem to remember him saying at some point that no meat was sweeter than that of his own offspring, which was why there weren’t that many around.
    I’m trying to find proof but if it exists it’s buried somewhere in a room full of a decade’s worth of comics.
    Does anyone remember something on that subject?