Shortpacked! by David Willis
Toys are serious business.
Convention appearances:
Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Multiplex
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
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80 page GIANT
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The Book of Biff
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Comics Curmudgeon
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So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
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Lol! Holy cow, first to comment? Anyway. Poor Riddler. I’d have nightmares.
No nightmares because he is busy being dead…
The Riddler’s seeing double, er triple, uh thirteeble?
Quadriddle.
Tribble.
Oh no, the tribbles!
This comment actually brought up one of the fondest memories I have of high school. My class was learning about Punnett Squares in biology, and there was a quiz question that had to do with Tribbles. BEST. QUIZ. EVER.
I’m Battribble.
Multiple Batmans wouldn’t make the criminals a superstitious and cowardly lot, it’d make them paranoid beyond belief.
Which honestly, sounds like it might be more effective and the old approach. Not as mysterious, but still… the fear of a thousand Batmen running around just itching to beat the ever-loving hell outta ya, might discourage criminals some what more.
Just don’t wear hockey pants.
*pads
*pants
Why not?
Still not sure about Batman Inc, seems like Batman is too paranoid to work with that many people. Still, if they all answered to him I could see it. At least I get to see Dick and Damian work together.
Batman is a lot less paranoid and self-centered than he was before his journey back to the world of the living. His whole character arc in Return of Bruce Wayne involves him coming to admit 1) just how much he’s always been a team player who relies on his allies, despite trying to pretend he’s a loner and 2) that the idea of Batman is way more powerful than the person himself.
Seriously. The whole “Batman as Paranoid Loner” thing just doesn’t hold up, especially not with the Post-Modern Post-Miller Grim And Gritty Bat. The only superhero with more sidekicks, associates and costumed allies than Batman is Green Fragging Lantern.
Where’s part one?
http://www.shortpacked.com/2010/comic/book-12/05-neww-2010-comics/batmaninc/
Add the tag “batman incorporated” to that part too.
I’M BATMAN
I’m Batman and so’s my wife
I’m not Batman, I’m just wearing the uniform so I can sneak in and murder them all with a machine gun when they turn their backs…
Murder who? the Batmen or everyone else?
Yes.
When did Riddler turn into Ned Flanders?
Also. They hit him in the FAAAAAAAAAAAACE!
It seems cruel, but this way, the weaker Batmen will die off, leaving an evolutionarily superior breeding population.
I prefer to believe that a benevolent creator will choose the superior Batman, and the rest will have their bones placed in the Earth to confuse misguided archaeologists who will try to form them into a continuous progression of batmans based on the Lamarkian addition and loss of secondary features like purple gloves and underoos.
suddenly I’m thinking of that Greg Killmaster arc
“I’m THREE Batmans!”
I’m…oh dear, I really don’t want to know what’s going on in Gotham these days, do I?
You and me both, friend. You and me both.
You what’s REALLY controversial about today’s comics? Having a “shocking” new plot direction where Green Arrow is killing bad guys and feeling old. Again. Some more. Like he has for 20+ years. When he’s not dead that is.
Yep.
Cutting edge stuff there.
Batman Inc is really just a publicly funded Batmen of All Nations. And considering most of the Batmen of All Nations were killed off a couple years ago ole Batsy definatly needs new Bat-Allies….
And then the world was populated entirely by Batman. Batmans. Batmen. Whatever.
I believe the correct term is Batpeople. At least one of them has to be female.
For a minute there I was worried when Bruce didn’t even say “I’m Batman” even once. Nice to see it more than made up for.
“Gotham Box Factory” is my favorite thing ever.
*starts looking for work at a cape and cowl factory*
Specifically the Black and or Blue Pointy Eared Cape and Cowl Factory”
Just like Kingdom Come’s Batmen of Many Nations actually. Little by little Ross and Waid’s vision of the the DCU is coming to pass. Now we just need them to start saying I’m Batman in different languages…
Didn’t the Kingdom Come ‘verse also feature a female Kid Flash/Flash named Irey West and her slacker, embittered brother?
Not 100% sure about the brother, but there was a female flash in there. Pretty sure she was also a Batman follower…
Yep, Iris West, Wally’s kid.
-airfox
I’m surprised that today’s strip made no mention of Lord Death Man
This is way dumber than Batman finally just admitting that he needs to build some damn power armor already.
…Wait, if “Batman, Inc.” involves Hombres Murciélagos Para Todo El Mundo, doesn’t that mean some of them are going to be ethnic? I thought ethnics weren’t allowed in the DCU any more since Whitest Day killed off everyone who wasn’t a Manly White Silver Age American Man.
I thought Bruce already owned like, a bajillion suits of power armour?
Which characters are you referring to, exactly? Jason Rusch is a big part of the Firestorm story, plus you’ve got the new Aqualad and Black Manta being prominently featured in the Aquaman storyline. Oh, and the Martian Manhunter is green? Or does that not count because he used to disguise himself as a white guy?
“DC Comics superheroes aren’t all white because the Martian Manhunter is green” is one of the most hilarious assertions I’ve ever heard.
Meanwhile, non-white people have to be content with being sidekicks. That’s enough, right? We’ve thrown them a bone!
Superman, Mon-El, Sodam Yat, Kara Zor El and M’gann M’orrz are all Aliens and they are all still white.
I also feel the need to point out the seventy or so white martians that still exist in comparison to the ONE green martian who had spent the better part of two years dead…
Yeah but the white martians are bad, so it’s totally PC
This is hilarious.. It worked for the three amigos, after all
I’m…pretty sure John Stewart and Black Lightning are still around…
I think those guys strongly fall under the category of “sidekicks.” John Stewart isn’t the main Green Lantern. And does Black Lightning actually ever do anything? Isn’t he just scenery?
I was gonna say Virgil Hawkins was around, but he’s part of the Titans, which is essentially the sidekick team.
Oh. Well, I was referring to all non whites getting “killed off”, but I guess the same sidekick thing can be said for Steel. Mr. Terrific? He’s…terrific and stuff?
I think Mr. Terrific and The Question might be the only legacy characters that still get to be their New Ethnic Version. I love Mr. Terrific. He should show up more.
Ya know… I wonder how the criminals are going to feel about there being multiple Batmen. Will it make the idea of killing the Bat more appealing or less appealing? I mean, wouldn’t the status value of killing Batman be lost, knowing there is more than one?
You know, like how in X-Men toys, the rare female character is often more desired and more valuable than the thousands of Wolverine toys? Would this make Red Robin or Batgirl or Batwoman more of an impressive kill than Batman?
Surely they’d just compete with sheer numbers.
Crook #1: I’m the baddest baddie you’ll ever meet.
Crook #2: Oh yeah? I killed Batman.
Crook #1: So what, I killed three Batmen.
Crook #3: That’s nothing, I killed three Batmen, at the same time.
Crook #4: Well I killed four Batmen, each with their own weapons.
Crook #5: I killed a Batman by using another Batman as a blunt instrument.
Oh my god, I love that, I am going to have to quote that to my friends, I lol’d
Well from the comics, I know Joker for one just isn’t feeling the same spark for Dick as Batman. Maybe he just won’t have the heart with like 50 Bats. And Bane’s just going to get tired of breaking all those spines eventually. So there’s two down.
Didn’t Bane reform?
I could see the Joker going on a Batman killing spree so that he could find the original Batsy.
Sort of. If you count hanging out with the Secret Six “reform”.
Screw a batarang. That guy brought a folding chair! He wins the batman contest. Oh… Except for maybe the batman about to do the Star Fleet standard-issue Axe-handle… That’s a good one too… Tough call.
“I’m Batman.” “No, I’M Batman.” “No, I’M Spartacus. Wait, what were we doing?”
DID ANYONE ELSE JUST REALIZE HOW THEY WANT THEIR LIFE TO END??
There needs to be a giant version of that second to last panel. Preferably as a poster.
RIDDLE A DIDDLE!!!!
Awesome, just awesome. I’ll expect Batman Inc to turn into a mess of Batmen always coming to investigate the same crime from now on.
Sure, they’ll all Batman. But which one is the Goddamn Batman?
The one right behind us, about break our pelvises.
Pelves.
Pelvii.
Whatever.
Alternatively, the one trying to cave in Riddlers’ head with a chair.
I’m not Batman, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.
Sure, it’s working out now… But sooner or later they will turn on each other and call on the Battening. There can only be one!
It’s the new “I’m Spartacus.”
“I’m Spartacus!”
“I’M Spartacus!”
“Dude, you can’t be Spartacus. I just said I was Spartacus.”
“I want to be Spartacus!”
“You only want to be Spartacus because I said I was Spartacus!”
“Come on, pleeeeeease!”
“Fine, you be Spartacus.”
“YAY! I’m Spartacus!”
“I’m Batman.”
“I’M Batman!”
“Oh for the love of…”
“I’m Bat-Spartacus!”
Dude can I use this the next time I need a two man skit?
It’s the internet! I wouldn’t have put it up there if I didn’t expect to lose it. Use away!
I am now positive that the Riddler is secretly Robin. >_> I mean, hey, they talk the same. XD
I don’t get it.
Desanto, not The Boy Wonder
Haha, thanks. XD Guess I didn’t specify.
Ha, Gotham Box Factory.
Introducing the next Chainsawsuit sensation!
“I accidentally bought a Batman, Inc. franchise twice, now I’m–
TWO BATMEN”
There can be only one answer to this – they are all clones with all the knowledge and skills of the original – just some slight variations on the almost zero personality.
Batman Gotham *crick-crick*
Batman New-joy-see *p-tuoi*
Batman Moscova *hick*
Batman East LA *K-chik-click*
Batman Tokyo *veeeee*
Batman London *bo-biddle-wo-biddle-wo-biddle-wo-weee-oooo*
Poor Riddler. Everybody keeps forgetting he’s a good guy now.
Only because he probably realized that he’s the funnest to beat up.
(Wherein “beating up the Riddler” is my favorite euphemism for masturbation.)
Should I be aroused by this, or horrified?
Yes.
Beating up The Riddler = Masturbation
Capturing The Riddler = Gay Sex
Got anymore euphemisms involving The Riddler?
I’m just wondering, if Luthor gave a great percentage of humanity super powers with braniac’s little robots, then why are there so many Batmen?
At first I wasn’t certain if this was going to be a Batman Incorporated punchline or Ethan commenting on the sheer quantity of Batman figures released compared to his rogue gallery.
Is anyone else reminded of the Loony Toons short about the Tortoise and the Hare where it ends with the tortoise having about a hundred identical relatives?
How are they going to find that many people who watched their parents killed right in front of him/her?
Easy. They have a “Killing parents in front of children”-department at Batman Inc.
Wasn’t that the plot of “Batman: Beyond”…?
This is the best comic
THis looks as silly, it could be in one of those wacky Brave and the BOld episodes…
Seriously, I’m just reminded how glad I am I stopped reading DC comics alltogether. Rainbow Lantern corps, people killed off and brought back in a matter of 1-2 issues, Batman killing Darkseid with a gun, caveman Batman, pirate Batman… it’s like a bad dream indeed. I’ll rather re-watch Batman TAS and JLU…
JE SUIS BATMAN
Nous sommes Batman.
I bet Riddler has nightmares that go like this.
Fo’ shiddle.