Shortpacked! by David Willis

Toys are serious business.
RSS
‹
›
  • Home
  • About
  • Archive
    • by Calendar
  • Cast
  • Store
  • Tumblr
  • DeviantArt
Lee
First First in Chapter Previous Archives Random 91Comments Share Next Latest
Reddit Digg Facebook MySpace Delicious Stumbleupon Buzz Up! Mixx Technorati Google Bookmarks Yahoo Bookmarks Yahoo MyWeb Windows Live Propeller FriendFeed Newsvine Xanga LinkedIn Blinklist Twitter
‹‹ First
‹ Previous
Next ›
Last ››

Lee

by David Willis on August 20, 2010 at 12:01 am
  • 01 - Mike Doesn't Fuck Amber's Mom

└ Tags: amber, drunk mike, faz, mike, stacy

Discussion (91) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Drdvd
    Drdvd
    August 20, 2010 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

    first comment XD

    what the hell is Faz’s last name?

    • Clark
      Clark
      August 20, 2010 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

      O’Lee.

      It’s a pun on a Restaurant. Fazoli’s I think it was?

      • Trae Dorn
        Trae Dorn
        August 20, 2010 at 8:39 am | # | Reply

        His last name is just “Lee” — his middle initial is “O”

    • awa64
      awa64
      August 20, 2010 at 12:08 am | # | Reply

      Look up a few lines from your comment.

    • Sheason
      Sheason
      August 20, 2010 at 12:09 am | # | Reply

      Do… we care? Are we caring about that?

      • No0ne
        No0ne
        August 22, 2010 at 6:52 pm | # | Reply

        Not even No0ne cares about Faz’s last name.

        • Lan Mikoto
          Lan Mikoto
          August 22, 2010 at 10:51 pm | # | Reply

          Yeah. I don’t think even Faz cares about his last name so much as trying to lose his virginity.

          • gwalla
            gwalla
            August 23, 2010 at 12:10 pm | # | Reply

            Faz already lost his virginity, just not the way he wanted.

    • Princesscarlos
      Princesscarlos
      May 17, 2012 at 12:57 am | # | Reply

      Faz IS his last name. His first name is The. Middle name Great.
      The G. Faz

  2. Clark
    Clark
    August 20, 2010 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

    I just love how he can still be an outright, evil jackass and still do it with a smile on his face. Go Mike!

    • David Herbert
      David Herbert
      August 20, 2010 at 5:19 am | # | Reply

      He should always be semi-tipsy so he can be nice and evil at the same time. It just works so well for him.

  3. JumboJetJester
    JumboJetJester
    August 20, 2010 at 12:08 am | # | Reply

    Mike in mid-drunk-tranformation?

  4. Dedlok
    Dedlok
    August 20, 2010 at 12:09 am | # | Reply

    I think the answer you’re looking for is closer than you think.

  5. meanders
    meanders
    August 20, 2010 at 12:25 am | # | Reply

    Completely ignoring Robin and Les’ of course!
    I love Mike, I really do.

  6. Jabberwocky
    Jabberwocky
    August 20, 2010 at 12:25 am | # | Reply

    I didn’t know Faz was Irish.

    • Johaely
      Johaely
      August 20, 2010 at 2:38 am | # | Reply

      At first i tough he was asian but he is aparently of the country of ambigious nationality.

      • Aitherion
        Aitherion
        August 20, 2010 at 5:29 am | # | Reply

        Faz is Korean.

        • Rick Sivart
          Rick Sivart
          August 20, 2010 at 10:57 am | # | Reply

          Faz is Scotch-Korean like the kid in the Starburst commercials.

          • Blaze
            Blaze
            August 20, 2010 at 12:33 pm | # | Reply

            sweet jebus no!
            That just be an excuse for him to go around in a kilt talking about his free hanging junk…

            dammit this means its going to happen doesn’t it?

          • TexasNinjaBuzzard
            TexasNinjaBuzzard
            August 22, 2010 at 4:13 am | # | Reply

            Wait, Internet Personality Vangelus is in a Skittles commercial?

    • OldsVistaCruiser
      OldsVistaCruiser
      August 20, 2010 at 5:11 am | # | Reply

      You HAVE heard of Chin Ho Kelly, haven’t you?

  7. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    August 20, 2010 at 12:27 am | # | Reply

    BUGS BUNNY: Mike doesn’t have to kill you now…

    FAZ: Kill me now! Kill me now!

    (Scene of unspeakable carnage…)

    FAZ: You’re despicable.

  8. Vivvav
    Vivvav
    August 20, 2010 at 12:32 am | # | Reply

    Faz hitting on Amber’s mom is horrifying.

  9. raijink
    raijink
    August 20, 2010 at 12:35 am | # | Reply

    Is that shocking backstory I smell? Stacy appears to think Faz looks familiar, like she knows a relative of his. If Faz and Amber turned out to be half-siblings, would Faz still keep after her? Probably.

    • Captain_Cadaver
      Captain_Cadaver
      August 21, 2010 at 1:20 am | # | Reply

      ew… please, no, Willis. Please, no.

      • Viktor
        Viktor
        August 21, 2010 at 10:04 pm | # | Reply

        Faz is Faz. Do you really think it would bug him? Amber will say no whether or not they’re related, so it won’t affect the plot, just the characters. And Faz not chasing her for any reason is out of character.

  10. Ziggy Stardust
    Ziggy Stardust
    August 20, 2010 at 12:39 am | # | Reply

    Haha! It’s still such a lark seeing Mike smiling.

  11. TheAlucinaut
    TheAlucinaut
    August 20, 2010 at 12:40 am | # | Reply

    I thought it was “Faz O. Lee”

    • Davoise
      Davoise
      August 20, 2010 at 3:11 am | # | Reply

      Faz is of Korean descent, so I figured it would be Faz Oh Lee.

      • schoolmarm
        schoolmarm
        August 24, 2010 at 1:20 pm | # | Reply

        But there is no letter Z in Korean, or F. The closest you can get to spelling Faz in Hangeul (Korean writing) is 팢 (Paj). In addition, any final J/ㅈ-sounding consonant will be pronounced “ji” by a native Korean-speaker if there’s no vowel after it to blend the J/ㅈ into. “Faz” would be pronounced “Pah-ji.” 이팢오 would be an incredibly surprising (currently nonexistent, borderline impossible) Korean name, especially shortened to just 팢.

        Of course, this is a comic strip with a sentient car.

        • David Willis
          David Willis
          August 24, 2010 at 1:24 pm | # | Reply

          The person you’re responding to is only talking about Faz’s middle initial. Faz, being born in America, can have any random non-Korean first name his parents wanted.

    • GrassyNoel
      GrassyNoel
      August 20, 2010 at 3:52 am | # | Reply

      Full of beans, that man.

  12. BritNinja
    BritNinja
    August 20, 2010 at 12:57 am | # | Reply

    If Faz could piss off drunk!Mike sufficiently and incite him to behave as sober!Mike towards him (as only Faz could) would this cause Mike’s dual personality to fracture and the two halves flow into each other, forming some kind of balanced and well-adjusted mecha-Mike who can express the entire spectrum of emotions at will? Or would the two halves then cancel each other out leaving Amber bereft and your mom undone in a Mikeless universe? Would that entire universe then be sucked into the resulting vortex? Or would Mike just have another slug of whiskey until even the pain of Faz is numbed?

    • Wack'd
      Wack'd
      August 20, 2010 at 1:29 am | # | Reply

      You got me. Clearly there’s no logic behind how Mike functions. I’m still boggling over his return to the land of the living.

      • Viktor
        Viktor
        August 20, 2010 at 2:18 am | # | Reply

        He did your mom until her yowls woke the dead. That’s what brought him back to life.

      • BritNinja
        BritNinja
        August 20, 2010 at 2:24 am | # | Reply

        I always assumed he was too much of an asshole even for hell (obviously there is no booze in hell).

      • Platonix
        Platonix
        August 20, 2010 at 2:34 am | # | Reply

        Didn’t SEMME have access to a resurrection chamber by the end of IW! ?

        I’m pretty sure I recall the resurrection chamber…

        …then again, We never did learn what Mike’s abductee power is, unless it’s a supernatural sense of how to be the biggest asshole possible in any situation. Maybe it’s an inability to stay dead?

        • Platonix
          Platonix
          August 20, 2010 at 4:52 am | # | Reply

          Okay, just went back through the archives. Resurrection chamber, check (built by Joe from a small piece of a destroyed one). Chamber requires DNA sample of dead guy, humorous moment about source of dead central character’s DNA sample. Mike (and several other people) killed into so very much death that there “probably” isn’t any hope of locating a sufficient DNA sample.

          Yeah, that’s like pushing your enemy off a cliff and leaving in my book. Far too much chance of surprise resurrection one or two seasons later.

          • MrGBH
            MrGBH
            August 20, 2010 at 8:08 am | # | Reply

            But there were a lot of people on the list ahead of Mike to be raised. Grace, Mandy and Guns were specifically mentioned, as well as Tony, Alan and Beefy as questionable. Also, as Joe said, the government would probably step in to use the resurrection chamber for their own ends before they could resurrect everyone.
            And also, it was about nine months from the end date of IW (As posted in the top corner of the panel during Walky’s resurrection) and the start of Shortpacked, leaving time for only one person to be raised. Considering Robin’s reaction upon seeing Mike in Shortpacked, it’s highly improbable that Mike was chosen second.
            Not impossible, just improbable.
            And of course Gallasso also brought back Reagan.
            I have a theory.
            Gallasso owns a resurrection chamber. Mike had worked for him previously and after hearing of Mike’s death on the news, Gallasso resurrected him using some DNA such as a hair on Mike’s work shirt. Gallasso also bought Reagan’s comb on Ebay and used a hair from that to resurrect Reagan.

            However, that clashes with my theory that Mike’s only working for Gallasso to learn his trick of raising people without a chamber so that he can bring back Dinah to make up for him getting her killed.

            So that’s two seperate theories I have.

            • quietdevious1
              quietdevious1
              May 10, 2011 at 7:16 pm | # | Reply

              My theory: Galasso saw the people from SEMME fighting the Martians, and said to himself, “My empire must be ruled by mutants!” He managed to find all the components needed for a resurrection chamber and a box of SEMME stuff from storage (possibly on eBay). The box happened to be the stuff from Mike’s room, because he was dead and couldn’t claim it. When Galasso succeeded in bringing Mike back to life, he said, “You will be my heir!” to which Mike replied “Fuck you.” Mike went to see his parents for a bit, then decided that he didn’t want to legally change his status from being dead and had to find a job where he wouldn’t have to fill out paperwork or could easily have it faked. Galasso brought him back illegally and therefore had to hire Mike “or else”. Agatha knew Mike from SEMME, and helped him get a job at McAwesome’s under the condition that he always shows up drunk to work.

          • thomas0comer
            thomas0comer
            November 24, 2011 at 7:28 pm | # | Reply

            As if SEMME didn’t have other rez chambers made after a short while. Somebody probably swiped one, used a DNA sample (from anything Mike touched, possibly your mom) to bring him back, and told nobody.

      • Tev
        Tev
        August 22, 2010 at 6:50 pm | # | Reply

        http://www.shortpacked.com/blog/comic/book-1-brings-back-the-80s/01-just-a-toy-store/a-9/

        “Months later”… maybe 9 months later?

        • Wack'd
          Wack'd
          May 12, 2012 at 12:58 am | # | Reply

          Nope. Five. I’ve checked.

    • TexasNinjaBuzzard
      TexasNinjaBuzzard
      August 20, 2010 at 2:47 am | # | Reply

      It’s not really a “dual personality”, he’s just a Nice Drunk. Lots of people are ______ Drunks; they go straight to a particular personality aspect/flaw/quirk under the influence and stay that way ’til the hooch wears off. It’s only dissonant enough for comedy purposes because Mike is such an unremitting shit-shucker the rest of the time. No one would giggle at Ethan being a Nice Drunk, although him being a Violent Drunk would be pretty funny.

    • Jonn
      Jonn
      August 20, 2010 at 5:51 pm | # | Reply

      White Lantern Mike.

      Holy crap.

    • Historyman68
      Historyman68
      September 28, 2011 at 10:18 pm | # | Reply

      A general trend I’ve noticed with Mike is that he’ll generally threaten to do something only if he’s not planning on immediately doing it. Otherwise he’ll generally just do it without warning. eg, all the times he’s threatened to kill the hams, and hasn’t actually done it, versus punching Ethan unprovoked.

  13. Samuel
    Samuel
    August 20, 2010 at 1:22 am | # | Reply

    Haha. That’s awesome.

    Can I still like this comic since its creator hates me? I do anyway.

    • Kumata
      Kumata
      August 20, 2010 at 8:56 am | # | Reply

      Willis hates you? Do tell.

      • Michael
        Michael
        August 20, 2010 at 12:40 pm | # | Reply

        …since you’re already enough of an attention-seeking douche to leave anonymous little comments about the issue on the internets.

        • Kumata
          Kumata
          August 20, 2010 at 4:07 pm | # | Reply

          ..?

          • Samuel
            Samuel
            August 20, 2010 at 4:24 pm | # | Reply

            Kumata, I made some very unpopular statements a few strips ago. Many took issue with what I said, including Mr. Willis.

            If you’re really curious, check the comments to a few days ago.

            As of this point, I am dropping the issue. I will no longer bring it up, even if asked.

          • MrGBH
            MrGBH
            August 20, 2010 at 5:53 pm | # | Reply

            He argued at length with Willis about the intent of one of the characters. That’s pretty much it.

        • Samuel
          Samuel
          August 20, 2010 at 4:20 pm | # | Reply

          My comments are just as anonymous as yours, so…….

          I keep forgetting the internetz is serious business.

          Clearly, my opinion is different than yours. And by simply referencing that opinion, I MUST have a number of serious character flaws.

          Indeed, after finishing this post, I must return to my day to day job of killing orphans with a claw hammer.

          Whereas if I was an echo chamber for what you believe, I would be a pure oracle of absolute truth. And by making an “anonymous” post, I would have simply be doing my part to spread enlightenment throughout the world.

  14. MrGBH
    MrGBH
    August 20, 2010 at 2:13 am | # | Reply

    Please tell me that my earlier prediction isn’t coming true. I’m running low on brain bleach dammit!

  15. Red
    Red
    August 20, 2010 at 4:27 am | # | Reply

    I don’t know what’s creepier…. Mike starting to smile, but not quite there yet or Faz interested in being in a threesome with Mike and Amber.

    • EspanolBot
      EspanolBot
      August 20, 2010 at 5:12 am | # | Reply

      I think that it was more Faz wanting a threesome with Amber and her mum.

      • Red
        Red
        August 20, 2010 at 8:27 am | # | Reply

        Well, considering how many times Faz has messed around with guys (Ninja Jack and giving Ethan a message), either scenerio is a possibility.

        • Rick Sivart
          Rick Sivart
          August 20, 2010 at 11:03 am | # | Reply

          I had the same thought about a Faz-Amber-Mike sandwich. Also, considering how Mike is the one that “helped” Ethan realize that he was gay, it wouldn’t be out of character for Mike to accept the offer of a three-way. Though Mike would then really mess with Faz by making him a bottom and making sure that Faz would not get any time with Amber.

  16. Björn
    Björn
    August 20, 2010 at 4:40 am | # | Reply

    Faz needs to cut his hair.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      August 20, 2010 at 10:52 am | # | Reply

      He needs to grow it more. We can still see his face, and he can still see out to avoid walking into traffic.

      • MrGBH
        MrGBH
        August 20, 2010 at 5:54 pm | # | Reply

        We can but dream.

  17. Anonymous
    Anonymous
    August 20, 2010 at 5:13 am | # | Reply

    I’ve been working my way through the It’s Walky! archives, and just out of curiosity… Can someone rank the abductees in terms of strength?
    Or rather, the strong ones. Is Walky stronger than Tony? Mike? Beef? Sal?
    I don’t know if this is considered to be a spoiler or something, being posted at Shortpacked! and all, but I don’t know where else to ask.

    • pakopako
      pakopako
      August 20, 2010 at 11:25 am | # | Reply

      Walky overrides everything, strength-wise. I’d bet Sal fits in there too considering how interchangeable they are. (http://www.walkypedia.com/index.php/Abductee)
      It seems Tony is listed as the 2nd most notable powerhouse while Beef was merely “durable.”
      Huh. It seems everyone has superstrength and ultradurability on some level. Mike, Joyce probably even Joe and Dina.

      • David Willis
        David Willis
        August 20, 2010 at 11:42 am | # | Reply

        I don’t think that page is accurate. Beef is stronger than Walky, and so is Tony.

    • Crimson Magic
      Crimson Magic
      August 20, 2010 at 11:32 am | # | Reply

      Not completely sure but I think it goes something like this in terms of physical strength/endurance:

      Walky > Sal > Joyce > Beef = Tony > Mike = Robin

      Joyce has an aptitude for Martian Technology, and I’m not really sure if she’s really stronger than Beef/Tony or not (memory’s a bit foggy at the moment). I mainly recall her power being remarkable for one reason or another. Mike seems to have the extra strength and durability typical of abductees, but nothing remarkable (as far as we’ve been shown).

      Mind you, Jason has no abductee powers, yet I would consider him more dangerous than most of the SEMME agents – there’s something to be said for a keen mind and a strong will.

      • MrGBH
        MrGBH
        August 20, 2010 at 3:48 pm | # | Reply

        Plus Jason was raised by Britja’s, so his threat level isn’t to be underestimated.

        • BritNinja
          BritNinja
          August 22, 2010 at 8:58 pm | # | Reply

          Also, he’s such a sharp dresser, he could take someone’s eye out.

  18. sinistertwist
    sinistertwist
    August 20, 2010 at 7:54 am | # | Reply

    A wicked thought crossed my mind.

    What if Amber’s mom was asking because she thinks that she might know Faz’s father? What if she was going to marry said father or if Faz’s family was related to Amber’s in some way?

    Wouldn’t that be frightening for Amber? (I think Faz would still chase after her anyway.)

    • Kumata
      Kumata
      August 20, 2010 at 8:38 am | # | Reply

      Well, consider this. Amber’s father got into trouble with the Korean mafia. Faz is of Korean descent.

      • Kamino Neko
        Kamino Neko
        August 20, 2010 at 2:24 pm | # | Reply

        Are you implying that Faz may be Connected?

        That’s a frightening thought.

  19. Milosh
    Milosh
    August 20, 2010 at 9:42 am | # | Reply

    Faz probably has a brother or some other relative in the Korean mafia. There doesn’t seem to be any other reason why the fact that Amber’s mom remains unaware of his last name, after meeting all of the store’s employees, would be explicitly shown. She’d probably recognize the last name if she heard it.

  20. Milosh
    Milosh
    August 20, 2010 at 9:43 am | # | Reply

    Oh, and one more thing – after all these years, Happy Mike never fails to totally creep me out.

  21. begbert2
    begbert2
    August 20, 2010 at 10:55 am | # | Reply

    I was going to remark on how well Stacy seems to have taken meeting the talking car, and then at the last moment I remembered they’re common now.

  22. Zak
    Zak
    August 20, 2010 at 11:25 am | # | Reply

    I know that the resurrection chamber theory is always the lead runner but what about the clone thing? Remember Anti-Head Alien? What if this is Anti-Mike, quick pay attention to minute details in the archives to see if he used to be a southpaw but is now a right hander.

    • Milosh
      Milosh
      August 20, 2010 at 12:36 pm | # | Reply

      No good, he’s always been ambidextrous. At least, I seem to remember Walkypedia saying so, with sources.

    • Platonix
      Platonix
      August 21, 2010 at 1:44 pm | # | Reply

      Highly doubtful. Anti-Mike would certainly be nice while sober, which this Mike is most definitely not.

  23. ziggy78eog
    ziggy78eog
    August 20, 2010 at 12:56 pm | # | Reply

    Even friendly, drunk, Mike wants to hurt Faz. Now that says something; it takes a certain level of annoyance to cause even friendly drunks to want to hurt a person.

  24. Blazey
    Blazey
    August 20, 2010 at 1:42 pm | # | Reply

    I think it’s just that he’s warning Faz what he’ll do sober.

    Mike is cognizant of how he behaves sober while he’s drunk.

  25. begbert2
    begbert2
    August 20, 2010 at 3:53 pm | # | Reply

    I was just poking around Walkypedia and it appears that every link to a Shortpacked column there is broken, and just comes to the current comic. In case anyone cares.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      August 20, 2010 at 3:54 pm | # | Reply

      Every link to a shortpacked *comic*, I meant. D’oh.

    • Strannik
      Strannik
      August 20, 2010 at 4:28 pm | # | Reply

      The website has been revamped from the ground up. The links haven’t been updated accordingly.

  26. Neon
    Neon
    August 20, 2010 at 4:26 pm | # | Reply

    Dude, happy Mike scares the ever loving shit outta me… but I like how he knows he’s still likely to hurt Faz.

  27. Captain Rufus
    Captain Rufus
    August 20, 2010 at 6:20 pm | # | Reply

    Is it wrong that I gave happy Mike threatening to kill Faz James Woods’ voice?

  28. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    August 21, 2010 at 2:00 am | # | Reply

    Not incidentally, Willis, what happened to the members-only J&W! strips? Have they been updating since March and I just didn’t get the notice (that my subscription ran out)?

    • David Willis
      David Willis
      August 21, 2010 at 8:57 am | # | Reply

      They are on hiatus because I am dumb.

      • Jen Aside
        Jen Aside
        August 21, 2010 at 1:08 pm | # | Reply

        Oh… Is dumbness curable by throwing money at you? =p

        • David Willis
          David Willis
          August 21, 2010 at 1:55 pm | # | Reply

          You’ve sent plenty! Send no more! I just need to take a week off SP! soon to finish it.

  29. Zudarkness
    Zudarkness
    August 21, 2010 at 2:51 pm | # | Reply

    Mike cracks me up. You just know that he’s gonna get Amber back for this later.

  30. Kitt
    Kitt
    May 22, 2011 at 10:42 pm | # | Reply

    Is it just me or does Faz seem like F.E.Z. from That Seventies Show? You know, Foreign Exchange Student from God Knows Where, with a name you can’t pronounce?

  31. Kitt
    Kitt
    May 22, 2011 at 10:44 pm | # | Reply

    FES, I mean. Or was it Fez, for the fact that he may/may not be Moroccan and the hats they wear are called Fez? Am I reading too much into this? I mean, Fes/z was also hated by the cast for similar reasons as Faz

  32. SonicBlueRanger
    SonicBlueRanger
    August 22, 2011 at 1:13 pm | # | Reply

    I love it’s Drunk Mike who want’s to kill Faz.

Comment ¬
Cancel reply

NOTE - You can use these HTML tags and attributes:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Convention appearances:

Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15

Roomies! It's Walky! Joyce and Walky!
Multiplex
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ

The Transformers Wiki

Hail to the Slash

80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark

Frumph.NET

Search tags

Tags

amber animated batman botcon conquest conventions dark of the moon david willis dinobot drew duncan ethan faz galasso generations gijoe guest strip hamsters homosexuality jacob jesus joe justice league ken leslie lucy malaya megatron merch mike ninja rick nipple optimus prime politics religion robin desanto ronald reagan roz sdcc shattered glass star wars tni strips transformers transformers prime ultra car

©2005-2013 David Willis | Powered by WordPress with ComicPress | Subscribe: RSS | Back to Top ↑