Shortpacked! by David Willis

Discussion (50) ¬

1. 
   vivvav

   July 26, 2010 at 12:04 am | # | Reply

   Batman is the best at everything, which is why the new DCU Online trailer in which he dies is bullshit.

   • 
     LockeZ

     July 26, 2010 at 12:43 am | # | Reply

     Maybe he’s the best at dying.

     • 
       Samuel

       July 26, 2010 at 12:47 am | # | Reply

       He’s the best at everything. Even dying.

       I mean how many people die just to end up fighting cavemen and Blackbeard.*

       Your afterlife will not involve that much ass kicking.

       *Yes I know he technically didn’t die.
     • 
       vivvav

       July 26, 2010 at 9:14 am | # | Reply

       Yeah, but the problem is that he dies like a bitch.
       He’s tied up with Wonder Woman’s lasso and beaten like a piñata by Deathstroke.
       Or maybe shot by the Joker. It’s not clear.

       • 
         electricmulch

         July 26, 2010 at 12:53 pm | # | Reply

         Clearly its part of his plan. In death he will be more powerful than ever before….

         • 
           DCHorror

           July 26, 2010 at 8:53 pm | # | Reply

           So he retroactively inspired Obi-Wan’s quote about being more powerful than you can imagine if you strike me down?
       • 
         akamaz

         July 28, 2010 at 9:03 am | # | Reply

         was it batman who was the pinata, or earth 3 owlman?
   • 
     Orange Pickles

     March 20, 2011 at 7:18 am | # | Reply

     You obviously didn’t play the game cause he doesn’t die.

     • 
       Sephiroth144

       June 6, 2011 at 11:00 pm | # | Reply

       He doesn’t die in the future, before that timeline’s Luthor comes back…? After, you know, killing the JL?

       And, it does make sense- the one person who would be a true threat for Batman is Luthor, so if he’s pulling responsive strings, Batman could be taken off the board.

       • 
         Glomoro

         January 7, 2012 at 10:14 pm | # | Reply

         He survived and became a bit of a cyborg, he’s the one who helped Lex and some others get the time travel to even work.
2. 
   Stephen Bierce

   July 26, 2010 at 12:07 am | # | Reply

   Meanwhile, Robin sits in the shade of the Engine of Mass Destruction(TM), thinking up a joke while waiting for Batman to finish what he’s doing.

   • 
     TheBananaFish

     July 26, 2010 at 2:26 am | # | Reply

     Holy obsolete sidekick Batman! That’s a lot of chiken!
3. 
   sadie

   July 26, 2010 at 12:11 am | # | Reply

   oh Camilla, how could you!

   • 
     carnackiArdent

     March 1, 2013 at 4:05 am | # | Reply

     … My thought process was scarily close to this.
4. 
   Cassie

   July 26, 2010 at 12:31 am | # | Reply

   I’m not sure if batman is humping the chicken or fighting it.

   • 
     Samuel

     July 26, 2010 at 12:34 am | # | Reply

     Same here.

     I don’t know if Willis is an MMA fan, so I don’t know if batman is pulling guard or getting filled out like an application.
   • 
     Wesley D Willis (no relation)

     July 26, 2010 at 5:38 am | # | Reply

     since Gonzo is a specific type of hardcore pornagraphy genre, i am pretty sure he is humping the chicken…

     • 
       John the Great

       July 26, 2010 at 12:56 pm | # | Reply

       What? I thought he meant Gonzo like the muppet!

       • 
         Beyla

         July 26, 2010 at 11:33 pm | # | Reply

         I thought D. Willis was refering to the journalism.
       • 
         Lollertron

         July 6, 2011 at 11:02 am | # | Reply

         I would say that it’s both, but the implications of saying such a thing would shatter my feebel little mind and completely DESTROY every memory of the Muppets I have.
5. 
   David

   July 26, 2010 at 12:41 am | # | Reply

   It looks like he’s punching the chicken in one photo. Or was that intentional?

   • 
     Samuel

     July 26, 2010 at 12:45 am | # | Reply

     It looks like a punch.
   • 
     Kamino Neko

     July 26, 2010 at 12:52 am | # | Reply

     Pretty sure that’s intentional, what with the weird ‘Batman punches everyone’ meme going on here…
   • 
     gwalla

     July 26, 2010 at 11:40 am | # | Reply

     He’s choking it. HI-YO
6. 
   Ruler Bulon

   July 26, 2010 at 12:55 am | # | Reply

   Keep fucking that chicken.
7. 
   beinsane11

   July 26, 2010 at 1:39 am | # | Reply

   Sorry, but they’ll never live up to the original San Diego Chicken.
8. 
   sarevock

   July 26, 2010 at 2:16 am | # | Reply

   wait till you see batman with batman in a cup
9. 
   Moo

   July 26, 2010 at 2:56 am | # | Reply

   Looks like sexual posing and situations meets fighting. Batman must be on UFC tonight.

   • 
     Samuel

     July 26, 2010 at 4:06 am | # | Reply

     1993 called. It wants its joke back.

     • 
       Samuel

       July 26, 2010 at 4:12 am | # | Reply

       Seriously, the “grappling positions = sexual positions” thing is old, and only viable if you’re willfully ignorant at this point.

       But points for you for nor going for the “grappling is teh gay” homophobic response.

       • 
         Samuel

         July 26, 2010 at 4:18 am | # | Reply

         nor = not
       • 
         Turkishproverb

         July 26, 2010 at 4:31 am | # | Reply

         Then again, he DOES mention Gonzo, someone with a known chicken fetish.

         • 
           Samuel

           July 26, 2010 at 4:34 am | # | Reply

           Yes he does.

           Otherwise, what’s the relevance to this particular discussion?
         • 
           Dylar

           July 26, 2010 at 5:33 am | # | Reply

           The top right photo does go a long way to suggesting that the Caped Crusader is, in fact, taking it in the rear.
10. 
    Sili

    July 26, 2010 at 7:04 am | # | Reply

    Cockfight!
11. 
    Mattimus Prime

    July 26, 2010 at 7:10 am | # | Reply

    Center pic: “I said don’t look at me! (I’m Batman)

    Also: (had to be done)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2tLrvFycHXY

    • 
      Westacular

      July 27, 2010 at 2:20 am | # | Reply

      Did… did you just make a Blue Velvet reference? Because if that was intentional, holy crap, you win the prize for making this EVEN MORE disturbing and confusing. (And entertaining.)
12. 
    Mattimus Prime

    July 26, 2010 at 7:11 am | # | Reply

    * TOP center pic
13. 
    adius

    July 26, 2010 at 8:49 am | # | Reply

    How you can tell you’re more of a game nerd than a toy/comic nerd – if the first thing you thought when you saw this was “These must be Zelda chickens”

    • 
      Turkishproverb

      July 26, 2010 at 1:13 pm | # | Reply

      Zelda has no chickens. They have “Cucco” which are just like chickens.

      No, it doesn’t make sense to me either.
    • 
      Galindorf

      July 27, 2010 at 8:46 am | # | Reply

      That’s EXACTLY what I thought! XD I figured they had all come to lay him out for beating up on the one…
14. 
    izzatrix

    July 26, 2010 at 8:51 am | # | Reply

    At first glance I thought Batman was making his own Robot Chicken.

    • 
      MrGBH

      July 26, 2010 at 11:07 am | # | Reply

      I thought Batman was filling in for Peter Griffin.

      • 
        pabetism

        July 26, 2010 at 3:52 pm | # | Reply

        I checked shortpacked today via cell phone, so I was under the impression it was a Peter Grifin style chicken fight. That is until I got to the third panel down on the left. Is totaly Batman buggeed by domestic fowl.
      • 
        pabetism

        July 26, 2010 at 3:57 pm | # | Reply

        Also: Is maybe Ralph Steadman Gonzo? Not sure how that would work, but then the universe isn’t even sure on Steadman’s Gonzo.
15. 
    Doyle

    July 26, 2010 at 9:08 pm | # | Reply

    I can’t shake the feeling that there’s a Pink Flamingos joke being made here.
16. 
    Jen Aside

    July 26, 2010 at 9:09 pm | # | Reply

    Aw, poor Flora! …but getting whacked by the Bat is the best way to die, I suppose =o
17. 
    Chiparoo

    July 27, 2010 at 11:58 pm | # | Reply

    This just made my day.
18. 
    Fay

    November 28, 2011 at 6:06 am | # | Reply

    Batman loves the cock?
19. 
    Ziggy Stardust

    February 13, 2012 at 4:38 pm | # | Reply

    Oh! Those are SPIKE’s chickens, right?