It’s Optikk! His name is only pronounceable using a series of blinks, even though he has no eyelids.
Shortpacked! by David Willis
Toys are serious business.
Convention appearances:
Calgary Expo Calgary, AB: April 26-28
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Phoenix Comicon Phoenix, AZ: May 23-26, 2013
BotCon San Diego, CA: June 28-30
San Diego Comic-Con San Diego, CA: July 18-21
SPX Bethesda, MD: September 14-15
Multiplex
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Frumph.NET
Sorcery 101
Templar, AZ
The Transformers Wiki
Hail to the Slash
80 page GIANT
Axe Cop
The Book of Biff
Butt-Taco
Comics Curmudgeon
College Roomies from Hell!!!
Diesel Sweeties
Dinosaur Comics
Dr. McNinja
Dresden Codak
Fans!
Fleen
Gastrophobia
Girl Genius
Girls with Slingshots
Goats
Hark, a vagrant
Hijinks Ensue
Intrepid Girlbot
Legend of Bill
Medium Large
Not Invented Here
Octopus Pie
Overcompensating
Penny Arcade
PhDcomics
Power Nap
Questionable Content
Real Life
Rob and Elliot
Bad Machinery
Schlock Mercenary
Sheldon
So Far Apart
Something Positive
Two Lumps
Wapsi Square
Wonderella
Wondermark
Frumph.NET
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Actually, that makes He-Man a hybrid. So should his name be Prius? (Bad joke, I know).
Dude’s constantly all running on petrol and shit, though.
Sorry Optikk, but when you have a giant eye for a head, you’re a freak.
Seriously, a giant eye for a head is the worst evolution ever. All you have to do is throw sand on his head and he’s be done for.
I will say this though: Optikk is the coolest friggin name ever.
Actually I’d say this is the second worst evolution, with the Ood “we have our brains in our hands” as number 1.
I dunno, Star Trek 6′s “My delicate genitals are on my freaking knees so I kill myself kneeling” could give the Ood a run for their money.
How about the Ballchinians. Anyone?
That is a good point; ditto the Star Trek alien with the genitals in his knees.
But Optikk is definitely in the top three (Behind the Ood and the genital knee alien)
Giraffes have got to be up there; they die if they don’t drink enough, but they also die if they spend too long drinking…
Isn’t that how pretty much every species ever works?
Very few planets are, in fact, not in space.
Yeah, the ones that aren’t orbit your momma.
sorry, that was uncalled for…
But some moons do try to leave.
That’s it, He-Man. Take the moral high ground.
By Crom? Is He-Man Conan’s lost brother?
Pretty much.
He-Man was originally supposed to be a Conan toyline (Skeletor was Thulsa Doom), but in the end they couldn’t secure the rights, so they repurposed the designs.
She-Ra was originally supposed to be a Wonder Woman toyline too, and the same thing happened.
That is incorrect about the She-Ra line. After the Princess of Power line ended, Mattel developed a line similar to that one called “Wonder Woman & the Star Riders.”. The figures were slightly larger (the Princess Tenko line, produced by Mattel is the line that came into existence because the Wonder Woman line didn’t happen). Anyway, the WW & the Star Riders line used the same molds for the horses in the line as the She-Ra line had.
Actually, the Conan/He-Man thing is incorrect as well. He was a generic viking/barbarian originally, horned helmet and all. And his main villain looked more like Beast Man than Skeletor.
Actually, She-Ra line was designed specifically for the a spin-off of He-Man. That series was so popular that Mattel felt they could also get money from little-girls as well as little-boys.
He-Man unfortunately only had four primary female characters (Teela, Sorceress, Evil-in and the Queen), so the new toy-line and series was developed for girls, but still tied into the He-Man series. This would also allow the toy-company to make money of the boys still, due to many boys collectors wanting She-Ra and supporting character to ‘complete the set” if you will. I remember going to the toy story and seeing so many boys awkwardly going into the girl’s toy section to locate the Princess of Power, grabbing the toy and then running like hell.
But now, since the He-Man Classic toys are mail-order, boys can purchase She-Ra without acting like they’re buy porn, and asking the register person to put the toy in a plain brown bag, so their friends don’t see.
Rather crafty of them, if you ask me.
Actually, the story of He-Man is based off of an old sanskrit tablet found under a mountain in southeast Michigan. It tells the story of a former snowboarder turned tupperware salesman. The Mattel archealogical department aquired the tablets from their founder, Soupy Sales, and embellished the story to make a successfull toyline.
She-Ra was based off a failed porn movie about Betty White with all the sex scenes taken out.
I was going to object that Betty White doesn’t do nudity, then I noticed you said it was about her, not starring her.
…carry on.
Have an internet, it’s on the house :]
Ya goofed He-Man’s shield. The cross on it is metal like the border, and extends to the edges. The red on it is actually the background color.
Here is a strand of hair:
http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y67/tanyeewei/hair2.jpg
You are splitting it.
(Not that I wouldn’t do the same thing…)
Took me a minute to actually be able to follow the order of panels correctly.
Same here, I was pretty confused for awhile.
Looks like a pretty standard panel layout to me.
Nah it’s cos the first panel looks like it’s split in two somehow, so you go on to the second panel without reading He-man’s “by crom!!” thing, and it ends up seeming like big ole eyemonster guy is just sort of talking to himself about this stuff with no real catalyst. But well, actually, it turns the comic from ‘he-man is an idiot’ to ‘guy with eyeballhead has ADD’ so I guess it’s cool.
The dialog box conspires to disrupt the action blocking such that it does seem to seperate in to two panels.
A necessary evil. Where else would the balloon go? Above Optikk? Below He-man in one of those awkward looks-like-a-caption-box-but-is-a-dialog-balloon moments? The flow-of-time within the panel’s “blocking” must override the spatial one. (Which is a pity, because it undercuts the nicely looming alien.)
Poor Optik; I’d give him a pat on the head, but I have a feeling he wouldn’t appreciate it.
Uhm, we don’t know for certain that Queen Marlena is from Earth in the new continuity yet.
oh hell yes, my random avatar is Skeletor!
You’re lucky. I mean, I like Flash, but I would have loved Batman. Is there a random Batman avatar?
Maybe i could just make my own, but screw it.
No one is awesome enough for The Goddamn Batman avatar.
David, be careful. This dude seriously hates on DCAU. “toons for retards!”
No.
I LOVE the DCAU. I hate the idea of DC Animated only characters appearing in DCUC, which is a COMIC line.
you a hater
Not that he should even know who He-Man’s parents are…
But He-Man is Prince Adam but just more naked!
He-Man is Prince Adam?! You lie!
AND more tan.
I try to defend MotU as much as I can, as it’s one of my favorite things, but seriously. Outside of the 2003 cartoon, that whole identity thing was rediculous.
The big eye lets him see the obvious. Prince Adam doesn’t even try using glasses to mask his secret identity. Damn most villains are stupid.
Is Visine like aspirin for Optikk?
You’re head is a giant eyeball? There’s a Visine for that.
Ben Stein is like the Pope.
Does he spend his spare time hanging around the girls dorm? >_>’
Now that the joke is outta’ the way: Oh, by the Gods! I still have his original figure! Just ran across him yesterday! Freakish coincidence? Far as I know that was the only [i]New Adventures of He-Man[/i] figure I owned.
Thanks for pointing out his sale page, Willis! I must own this new version…
And his eye/head still twists by the knob in the back! Awesomeness! Will his arm still spring up when you twist his waist, though?
What’s with the shout out to Primus in his bio? Was there ever a crossover planned with He-Man and Transformers? Was Primus around or even a thought when He-Man was popular?
Why am I asking so many questions?
– agent_of_the_8.
I thought he-man was made by mattel?
Have hasbro and mattel made crossovers before?
Optikk is from the later Sci Fi He-man line Mattel did after the original ended. It was simply set on the planet Primus. (Probably because it sounds sci-fi-ish and means like “first” )
That said I really kinda want the new Optikk toy. Though the cartoon neer thrilled me we had a ton of the Space He-man toys and I’ve got a nostalgia jones for him. Hope they do some more figs from the line.
Waitaminit… Optikk is from the planet Primus???
CROSSOVER!!!!!
(Crossover croooossover, crossover crooooossover…)
Whoops, never mind…
Yeah, he’s from Denebria™, but Sci-Fi He-Man’s friends, the Galactic Defenders, are from Primus.
It’s odd that his planet is trademarked but Primus isn’t…
– a.o.t.8.
Primus appears to be noncopyrightable for whatever reason. 3 comic book characters from Marvel and DC, the TF guy, the He-Man planet the eponymous band all debuted within a 10 year period. I suspect that the ecclesiastical meaning has simply made the name such a ubiquitous staple of speculative fiction that it’s “communal property” like the names of the Zodiac.
Also– Willis has a maximum comment depth set to 5? (I had to hack to get around that.) I can totally think of some CSS that would better address this.
As a MOTUC collector I figure I should clear a few things up:
1) In the Classics line there are “no action features”. A bit of a sticking point when a lot of figures were defined by their action gimmick. Anyhoo the dial on Optikk’s back is a non-functional homage to the original. It’s there, but it don’t move or do anything. Also nothing will happen when you twist the waist other than the torso and waist being unaligned.
2) If you want one of these be aware: they sell out FAST! I can not emphasize this enough. Evil-Lyn and Moss Man (the last 2 figures) sold out in about 5 minutes. And there are issues where you’ll have the figure in your cart and when you try to make the purchase it’s already sold out. Just forewarning it can be rough. If you miss out and still want one you can find him on eBay and BBTS for a bit of a markup or they re-issue figures every month and they usually last a couple days but you may have to wait a year or so.
3) And answering a question from farther down the brand manager has stated that they are tested for kids 4+ but they’re aimed for an older market so the 18+. I know of some parents who buy these for their kids to play with because they grew up playing with He-Man.
1) Aww, yeah. Forgot about that. I mean, DAMN!, they *do* strive for authentic looks, but that’s just nerd-gasm interuptus right there, yo.
2) Bee’s knees about the heads-up. I know toy-geeks get ravenous when it comes to collectors items and I would love to get into the fray for this character… but I’m quite literally poor at the moment and on a tight budget for a while. Looks like it’ll be eBay that will be my FAR FLUNG future choice.
Thanks for all the whole info, Iggy!
– a.o.t.8.
He-Man is not my hero anymore – the racist, hypocritical bastich. Now all I’ve got left for muscle bound brutish Space-Ranger role models is Lobo
…
Perhaps his younger counterpart, Slobo?
>Bad Flashback to Sci-Fi He-Man series from the 90′s! Hold back child-like nerd rage!<
But Skeletor was voiced by Campbell Lane! It was awesome!
Thank you. That’s pretty much all the argument that needs to be given to the haters. If they can’t enjoy at least that much of the show, then there’s just no hope for them.
Sorry Willis and Luke, but even the mighty voice of Campbell Lane couldn’t save the series for me. It just wasn’t He-Man. I was a sad-little 8 year old, when I saw the series and didn’t get to watch Orko, Teela, Beastman or Man-E-Faces.
I wasn’t aware of New Adventures when it was on, and had to catch up via DVD. It’s not a great show, and it’s an even worse He-Man show, but Campbell Lane’s Skeletor single-handedly makes it watchable.
Wait…what?
He-Man’s always been sci-fi. Sci-fi mixed with fantasy, yes, but definitely sci-fi nonetheless.
Yeah, but the 90′s version was pretty much 99.9% sci-fi in a Star Trek-like fashion, and they got rid of all my favorite characters and replaced them with characters who felt like G.I. Joe rejects.
The title of this one cracks me up.
The answer to the question is no. No one can possibly explain why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch. It’s just so fucking DELICIOUS, it’s magical.
Why must we be 18 to buy him? Giant eye parental guidance advised?
I presume because these toys aren’t safety tested, as they would be required to be if they were sold in a toy store.
Does mattel safety test their stuff? It always seems to be mattel who have problems with lead paint or other issues. No one else, just mattel.
I feel like this strip is missing a remark about space mutant inna pants advantages versus non space mutant.
But maybe that’s too obvious.
Great job making Optikk look ashamed in that last panel. That can be difficult when the character doesn’t have a face.
I don’t think he looks ashamed, I think he looks exasperated. Like, *facepalm*.
I imagine that for a giant exposed eyeball, a facepalm would REALLY HURT.
I love it.
I thought for sure He-Man was just gonna stab him. Thats a good way to win an argument. *STABSTAB*
“Mattycollector forum thread: Will you be buying Optikk?
Yes 50%
No 50%
MANTENNA 14
LOVE CASTASPELLAAAAaaaaah …
PLOUF !
NO TO ALL IN ! NO TO ALL IN !”
Just testing oput to see what I get as a gravatar. Not a bad comic today, though I have never seen a single He-man’s episode.
He-man should run for office. He’s such a great debater eh?
clicked on the Optikk link..
Can anyone tell me what the hell a mutant shield is?
A. MUTANT. SHIELD.
Because the shield causes his left hand to become another right hand when he holds it?*
Maybe it’s not been revealed yet, but that’s really a mutant shape-shifter stuck in shield form that Optikk captured a while ago because his feared gun can cause morphing?
It’s only able to be used for mutants such as himself (much like only Mjolnir can be… no, that’s been disproved too many times… uhm, Robocop’s gun can be only fired by him)?
Your guess is as good as mine, d.w.a.s.d..
– a.o.t.8.
*It’s probably just a proto-photo, but I do hope Mattel corrected that before mass producing…
Optikk, the lost member of the Residents.
Can he even blink?
Optikk: Because its consumption immediately triggers a sugar-induced euphoric state?
Smarmy kids: No, it’s because of the sprinkles!
Optikk: That’s what I just said.
Optikk comic! He’s been one of my favorites for years. You earned some points today Willis… you earned some points.
I think the entire He-Man franchise is kind of like Batman. You can use it to make anything funny.
The cross on He-man’s torso is sliiighlty swastika-tilted around the edges, don’t you think?
“By Crom”?
In reference to the title, is it because it cuts your mouth to ribbons?
/eyepalm